₦airaland Forum

Hmmmmm......

Hi peeps,its ur gurl Doira. Pls vote n comment to show ur love for Taiwo Amusa Doira @ "Miss Motors Nigeria 2012". Let's join hands to vote/comment for "Taiwo Amusa" who is representing our country Nigeria @ Miss motors international. Am begging u all to help BC dis message on BB,Facebook,twitter n let it go across d globe.Ur vote counts ({}) :* GOD bless u all for ur supporthttp://m.facebook.com/pages/Miss-Motors-International-Nigeria/187080421370514?id=187080421370514&_rdr
Just showing love fr a friend,she is a wonderful girl.

[/quote][/color][quote author=e-herbal]the draconic traffic law which confisificates peoples rides,sentence to three years imprisonment,etc.these are traits of a man deprived as a child.a man that is so much in dire need of attention,he doesn't care whoose ox is gored,even if it's that of the electorates.all the activities of his wickd govt is to make life difficult for the struggling populace.from the mmbuka mechanic village in lawanson,tejuosho traders,yaba traders,makoko residents .even the tenancy law that was supposed to champion the cause of the poor man was not pursued to a logical conclusion.if he sentences offenders to three years for traffic offences,then he should be prepared to serve 30years for financial misappropriation at the end of his tenure[/quote]My guy why u go talk like dat na!..if u dnt violate d law ur car won't be confisticated na,its a simple n clear law fr a city in menace like Lagos.because we. were raised in dis mess doesn't make it right,change is inevitable.d makokos n co u mentioned are all illegal bt because dey av bin dere fr ages doesn't make dem legal!...

1. When in doubt, accelerate!

2. Be prepared to ram into anything stopping you that is wearing uniform in Lagos (police, traffic warden, FRSC, Kai brigade, fire brigade, VIO, LASTMA, LAMATA, LASWA)

3. If you get caught by any chance, do not allow them to enter your car, if they happen to get in do not drive from that spot (veer off traffic & settle promply), and if they don’t agree, pretend that you are calling your uncle who is in the army (believe me it always works), never follow them to any sort of office except you are ready to pay ten times more than what was demanded.

4. Never give police or VIO your original particulars (whether expired or up to date).

5. Danfo drivers believe they are immortal. Never yield to the temptation to teach them otherwise.

6. Okada riders have a pact with suicide, avoid them like a plaque.

7. Avoid BRT buses in all ramifications, they have no brakes.

8. Taxi cabs (oko asewo) should always have the right of way, all of them have been driving in Lagos for 25 years.

9. Never, ever, stop for a pedestrian unless he flings himself under the wheels of your car.

10. The first parking space you see will be the last parking space you see. Grab it. Survival of the fittest you may say!

11. Learn to swerve abruptly. In Lagos, potholes (and sometimes car-holes) are put in key locations to test drivers’ reflexes and shock absorbers,( I saw one man fishing in one of the potholes last week).

12. There is no such thing as “one-way” in Lagos. Expect traffic from any direction at all times. The okada riders are the experts in this area.

13. Never get in the way of a car that needs extensive bodywork, except you want to spend your whole Saturday at the panel beater’s place.

Morning rush hours

14. Morning rush-hours are equivalent to Lagos grand prix (who gets to the junction first).

15. There is no such thing as a short-cut during rush-hour traffic in Lagos. Everybody might be inclined to take that ’short-cut’.

16. When asking for directions, always ask at least three people. Lagosians always claim to know every inch of the city – even areas they’ve never been to.

17. Use extreme caution when pulling into service lanes. Service lanes are not for breaking down the traffic, but for speeding, especially during rush hour.

18. Never use directional signals, since they only confound and distract other Lagos drivers, who are not used to them.

19. Similarly, never attempt to give hand signals. Lagos drivers, unused to such courtesies, will think you are making obscene gestures to them. This could be very bad for you in Lagos.

20. Hazard lights (popularly called “double pointer”) is not, (as commonly supposed) used to indicate a hazard. It is a warning to you that he is a bonafide Lagos driver, he’s headed ’straight’ and as such, will not stop under any circumstance. Take him extremely seriously especially if he backs it up with a continuous blast from his “horn”.

21. At any given time, do not stand on the zebra crossing expecting traffic to yield to you, or else you will have to explain to the on coming traffic whether you look like a zebra.

22. Speed limits are arbitrary figures posted only to make you feel guilty.

23. Remember that the goal of every driver is to get there first by whatever means necessary.

24. In Lagos every spot is a potential bus stop. FRSC and LASTMA know that too. It is in their constitution.

25. Above all, keep moving. Even with a flat tyre!!!

HORNING IN LAGOS 

Horn’ when someone executes a dangerous maneouvre.

‘Horn’ when you’re about to move off.

‘Horn’ when you’re about to overtake.

‘Horn’ when someone is about to overtake you.

‘Horn’ when turning into a road.

‘Horn’ when emerging from a road.

‘Horn’ back when someone horns at you. It’s considered good etiquette.

‘Horn’ when you hear a chorus of horns. Don’t worry if you don’t know what all the ‘horning’ is about.

‘Horn’ when you’re happy.

‘Horn’ to the beat when you’re playing music in your car.

Good luck, as you expeditiously navigate through Lagos and hustle and bustle!

Source: Mayowa Owoeye (facebook notes)

Airtel jooor!!

Am with u on dis bro,but it was actually Sen Gbenga Ashafa dat replaced Sen Mamora nd nt Tinubu's wife....I think d Ashafa guy was heading d bureau of lands in Lagos then
Its a shame hw we could lose such a fine senator at dis critical time!

Dis is great!...I will love to attend d mainland edition inshaallahu...ma salam

Benissues: Wat of d song:rainbow!

And "bother u"."dance in d rain",infact u nid to listen to d album more often to feel 2baba phenomenom...o bad gan!

One of d vry few patriotic Nigerian,Tunde Bakare.
I would say ignore d messenger n ponder on d message itsef nd let's remove all sentiments of religion n ethnicity...it is said dat wen God is displeased wit a nation he gives it bad leaders.Nigeria must be great again!

Comments I disgust most reading on NL is "dis piece is too long,can sumone summarize"...even wen d piece is nt up to a page! Aaaarrgh!!

Php+Ajax programmer wanted for immediate employment. Pls contact: talk2davosoft@yahoo.com or dm to @daveodus ASAP........
Jus got dis info frm a fwend on my bbm contact.As me no qualify,I say make I share

Saw dis thread on frontpage ystday,n I almost got late fr an appointment wit ma fone batt flat.....like a poster said b4, neva gone past 3 pages on a thread nd posting fr d 2nd time on NL.I shake my bombom fr u!

If I can just throw in my opinion on dis issue.I wil put dis way,if d atheist believe dia is no God nd die as such nd truely after death it is confirmed dat no God exist,good fr d person!.but if odawise dat is a great misfortune.in essence it is wise to believe in d existence of God to b on d safer side in d hereafter if dia is anytin like dat.afterall d atheist has nt proclaim any punishment fr dos dat believe in God.