 Politics / Re: Presidency Visiting Nairaland Daily ( Photo) by Comsol: 12:36pm On Jan 20, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
هga shhhhhhh*
what will your comments do?
get your PVC and vote for your choice  Was it not our comments that brought them here? 3 Likes |
| Phone/Internet Market / Re: Bricked Tecno S9 For Sale by hovatek: 10:05am On Jan 20, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
how? lets start from the beginning . how did the phone get bricked and what have you tried so far. I need details |
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| Phone/Internet Market / Re: Bricked Tecno S9 For Sale by hovatek: 7:45pm On Jan 19, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
darling sorry!
mine is already accumulating dust.
same d9..
takn it to every phne engineer in lag but no solution you've been taking it to the wrong engineers. its not difficult to fix at all |
| Phone/Internet Market / Re: Bricked Tecno S9 For Sale by melicent: 7:05pm On Jan 19, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
darling sorry!
mine is already accumulating dust.
same d9..
takn it to every phne engineer in lag but no solution i don tire oooo tecno na bad market for me. |
| Family / Re: 6 Sure Ways To Save Your Marriage by jadelyn007(f): 7:04pm On Jan 19, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
Tgirl4real, RoyalRoy?  . You will grow old. Unless you are bashing nigerian female folks or advising the female folk to be subservient your thread ain't going to smell frontpage. But just incase it gets to frontpage lemme drop my own comment; Nice piece especially when both spouses are committed to doing all these, if its just one party doing all these, you are on a long thing cos it won't take long for the sacrificing one to feel frustrated and resentful, before you know the marriage comes crashing down like a pack of badly arranged cards |
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| Romance / Re: Stop Hypin Nl Dudes. by joseph1832(m): 3:59pm On Jan 18, 2015 |
thrizzle:
From what I have noticed from going through this thread is when you start getting into this nairaland ish it messes with your head when a grown man like unibenstudent has multiple accts and converses with them then you know it's not normal, even this annoying poser lilmaxfidel is just as bad. I think people just have too much time on their hands, that's all. Well majority of the movers and shakers on the Romance section are still in School and those who aren't students are housewives!. That's why they have too much time on their hands. IMO. |
| Romance / Re: Stop Hypin Nl Dudes. by Idowuogbo(f): 3:56pm On Jan 18, 2015 |
thrizzle:
[b]From what I have noticed from going through this thread is when you start getting into this nairaland ish it messes with your head when a grown man like unibenstudent has multiple accts and converses with them then you know it's not normal, [/b ]even this annoying poser lilmaxfidel is just as bad. I think people just have too much time on their hands, that's all. lmaooo! E no normal tru tru  1 Like |
| Romance / Re: Stop Hypin Nl Dudes. by thrizzle(m): 3:52pm On Jan 18, 2015 |
joseph1832:
So this whole brouhaha is happening because someone use one of his/her alternate account to defend his or herself?. If this is true, I say: "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone".
The sinners have already casted the stone forgetting they are also guilty of what they accuse the said kristina1 of doing. From what I have noticed from going through this thread is when you start getting into this nairaland ish it messes with your head when a grown man like unibenstudent has multiple accts and converses with them then you know it's not normal, even this annoying poser lilmaxfidel is just as bad. I think people just have too much time on their hands, that's all. |
| Romance / Re: Stop Hypin Nl Dudes. by lilmax(m): 10:10am On Jan 18, 2015 |
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| Romance / Re: Stop Hypin Nl Dudes. by Nobody: 10:06am On Jan 18, 2015 |
lilmax:
And she will come back with the “1“ in another moniker
Unibenstudent you sleep at all? yes I did boss are u also lilmaxfidel? |
| Family / Re: 6 Sure Ways To Save Your Marriage by englishmart(m): 9:29am On Jan 18, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
[i][/i]
written by lilmaxfidel we know say na you write am |
| Romance / Re: 7 Things You Must Never Do After A Break Up by iceberylin(m): 12:32pm On Jan 16, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
never see him/her in your dreams no matter how ukwulicious...
iceberylin i lie  Omo it depends how big Nigga |
| Family / 6 Sure Ways To Save Your Marriage by Nobody: 11:49am On Jan 16, 2015 |
If your marriage is struggling, or if you’re working to keep it strong, these six ideas will help you learn how to be selfless in your most important relationships.
1. Put your spouse's needs first
It may seem difficult to put your needs aside and focus entirely on your spouse’s, but that trust and commitment is what will strengthen your relationship and allow you to feel and express love. This idea works best if both spouses are serving each other equally.
2. Love unconditionally
One of the worst things you can do in a marriage is keep track of mistakes and weaknesses and use them against your spouse. If you are selfless, you love unconditionally. There are some behaviors that cannot be condoned, like any form of abuse, but small personality flaws and bad days should be overlooked. When you love unconditionally, you feel motivated to help your spouse be happy, succeed and feel loved by you.
3. Find ways to serve
If being selfless is new to you, it may take some practice. Start by finding small ways to serve your spouse. Take his turn doing the dishes. Make the bed in the morning before she does. Vacuum out his car or take the dog out in the morning so she can sleep in. Service promotes love and acts of service in return. It may take time for your spouse to reciprocate or for the idea to take hold, but keep trying. If you are in a good habit of service, continue.
4. Be a good listener
You can be selfless as you help your spouse emotionally. Be the person your spouse turns to as he vents about a bad day at work. Don’t try to fix things for your wife, just validate her feelings and offer suggestions if she asks for them. When listening, be engaged. Try holding hands and looking at your spouse’s face to read his expressions. Develop the quality of empathy so you can be more emotionally connected.
5. Learn to compromise
Being selfless does not mean being a martyr. You don’t have to give up your favorite period drama to watch his action movies for the rest of your life. Sometimes, being selfless merely means compromising.
Compromises bring you closer together. Cultivate the ability to compromise if you can’t quite agree on something. Let go of the need to be right or always get your way.
6. Pray for strength and help
have a firm belief that God wants you to be happy and for your marriage to be successful.Praying for selflessness helps you have more love and energy to spend on your partner.People have a tendency toward selfishness. Praying to overcome selfishness is important as you strive to be more selfless.
No marriage is perfect, but every marriage (and relationship) can be made better by developing just one's characteristics and selflessness. Implement these ideas and see how your marriage improves.
written by lilmaxfidel 1 Like |
| Literature / Re: Bleep And Run by losprince(m): 9:16pm On Jan 15, 2015 |
thanks guys for following me with patience. make una do buy car  cause the ride go soon rough  tags- iceberylin, Elparaiso lilmaxfidel Nmeri17 debonairprinx Elparaiso sleekbody proficienc Positivist aboyaj jhimmy Nuges11  2 Likes |
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| Phone/Internet Market / Re: Bricked Tecno S9 For Sale by falcon01: 9:27am On Jan 15, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
cant are you able to enter recovery mode .. volum plus and then power.. hold for ten scnds untill you see a liittle androdi icon like this 
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| Family / Re: 6 Ways To Avoid Marrying The Wrong Person by InvertedHammer: 4:14am On Jan 15, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
There is a right way and a wrong way to get to know someone for marriage. The wrong way is to get caught up in the excitement and nuance of a budding relationship and in the process completely forget to ask the critical questions that help determine compatibility.
so based on my observations, here are seven ways to avoid marrying the wrong partner.
Do Not Marry Potential
Oftentimes men consider marrying a woman hoping she never changes while a woman considers marrying a man she hopes she can change. This is the wrong approach on both accounts. Don’t assume that you can change a person after you’re married to them or that they will reach their potential. There is no guarantee, after all, that those changes will be for the better. In fact, it’s often for the worse. If you can’t accept someone or imagine living with them as they are then don’t marry them. These differences can include a number of things such as ideological or practical differences in religion, habits, hygiene, communication skills, etc.
Choose Character over Chemistry
While chemistry and attraction are no doubt important, character precedes them both. A famous quote follows, “Chemistry ignites the fire, but character keeps it burning.” The idea of falling “in love” should never be the sole reason for marrying someone; it is very easy to confuse infatuation and lust for love. The most important character traits to look for include humility, kindness, responsibility, & happiness.
Avoid Pre-Marital Sexual/Physical Activity
Recognize that there is incredible wisdom in why God has ordered us to refrain from intimacy before marriage; they are to prevent great harms as well as to keep sacred what is the most blessed part of a relationship between a man and a woman.
Aside from the obvious spiritual consequences, when a relationship gets physical before its time, important issues like character, life philosophy, and compatibility go to the wayside. Consequently, everything is romanticized and it becomes difficult to even remember the important issues let alone talk about them.
Avoid Lack of Emotional Connection
There are four questions that you must answer YES to; Do I respect and admire this person? What specifically do I respect and admire about this person?
Do I trust this person? Can I rely on them? Do I trust their judgment? Do I trust their word? Can I believe what they say?
Do I feel Safe? Do I feel emotionally safe with this person? Can I be vulnerable? Can I be myself? Can I be open? Can I express myself?
Do I feel calm and at peace with this person?
If the answer is “I don’t know, I’m not sure, etc.” keep evaluating until you know for sure and truly understand how you feel. If you don’t feel safe now, you won’t feel safe when you are married. If you don’t trust now, this won’t change when you are married!
Pay Attention to Your Own Emotional Anxiety
Choosing someone you don’t feel safe with emotionally is not a good recipe for a long-lasting and loving marriage. Feeling emotionally safe is the foundation of a strong and healthy marriage. When you don’t feel safe, you can’t express your feelings and opinions. Learn how to identify whether you are in an abusive relationship. If you feel you always have to monitor what you say, if you are with someone and you feel you can’t really express yourself and are always walking on eggshells, then it’s very likely you are in an abusive relationship which is potentially leading to a wrong marriage in all standards.
Beware of Lack of Openness In Your Partner
Many couples make the mistake of not putting everything on the table for discussion from the onset. Ask yourself, “What do I need to know to be absolutely certain I want to marry this person?” “What bothers me about this person or the relationship?” It’s very important to identify what’s bothering you, things that concern you, and things you are afraid to bring up for discussion. Then you must have an honest discussion about them. This is a great way to test the strength of your relationship. Bringing up issues when there’s conflict is a great opportunity to really evaluate how well you communicate, negotiate, and work together as a team. When people get into power struggles and blame each other, it’s an indication they don’t work well as a team. Also important is being vulnerable around each other. Ask deep questions of each other and see how your partner responds. How do they handle it? Are they defensive? Do they attack? Do they withdraw? Do they get annoyed? Do they blame you? Do they ignore it? Do they hide or rationalize it? [/b]Don’t just listen to what they say but watch for how they say it!
[i]With all this put into considerations, you could really head to a successful marriage
http://mentalhealth4muslims.com/2010/03/31/10-ways-to-marry-the-wrong-person/comment-page-2/#&panel1-5
/ We know all these already. Do you know how to differentiate between "packaged" and real deal? Now that's the one I am interested in learning not the obvious things. Honestly, no one knows their spouse until they live together for some years which is why people pray for divine guidance instead of checking a list of shallow characteristics/traits. \ 2 Likes |
| Family / Re: 6 Ways To Avoid Marrying The Wrong Person by Adaeze003(f): 10:30pm On Jan 14, 2015 |
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| Family / Re: 6 Ways To Avoid Marrying The Wrong Person by steve6: 7:40pm On Jan 14, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
There is a right way and a wrong way to get to know someone for marriage. The wrong way is to get caught up in the excitement and nuance of a budding relationship and in the process completely forget to ask the critical questions that help determine compatibility.
so based on my observations, here are seven ways to avoid marrying the wrong partner.
Do Not Marry Potential
Oftentimes men consider marrying a woman hoping she never changes while a woman considers marrying a man she hopes she can change. This is the wrong approach on both accounts. Don’t assume that you can change a person after you’re married to them or that they will reach their potential. There is no guarantee, after all, that those changes will be for the better. In fact, it’s often for the worse. If you can’t accept someone or imagine living with them as they are then don’t marry them. These differences can include a number of things such as ideological or practical differences in religion, habits, hygiene, communication skills, etc.
Choose Character over Chemistry
While chemistry and attraction are no doubt important, character precedes them both. A famous quote follows, “Chemistry ignites the fire, but character keeps it burning.” The idea of falling “in love” should never be the sole reason for marrying someone; it is very easy to confuse infatuation and lust for love. The most important character traits to look for include humility, kindness, responsibility, & happiness.
Avoid Pre-Marital Sexual/Physical Activity
Recognize that there is incredible wisdom in why God has ordered us to refrain from intimacy before marriage; they are to prevent great harms as well as to keep sacred what is the most blessed part of a relationship between a man and a woman.
Aside from the obvious spiritual consequences, when a relationship gets physical before its time, important issues like character, life philosophy, and compatibility go to the wayside. Consequently, everything is romanticized and it becomes difficult to even remember the important issues let alone talk about them.
Avoid Lack of Emotional Connection
There are four questions that you must answer YES to; Do I respect and admire this person? What specifically do I respect and admire about this person?
Do I trust this person? Can I rely on them? Do I trust their judgment? Do I trust their word? Can I believe what they say?
Do I feel Safe? Do I feel emotionally safe with this person? Can I be vulnerable? Can I be myself? Can I be open? Can I express myself?
Do I feel calm and at peace with this person?
If the answer is “I don’t know, I’m not sure, etc.” keep evaluating until you know for sure and truly understand how you feel. If you don’t feel safe now, you won’t feel safe when you are married. If you don’t trust now, this won’t change when you are married!
Pay Attention to Your Own Emotional Anxiety
Choosing someone you don’t feel safe with emotionally is not a good recipe for a long-lasting and loving marriage. Feeling emotionally safe is the foundation of a strong and healthy marriage. When you don’t feel safe, you can’t express your feelings and opinions. Learn how to identify whether you are in an abusive relationship. If you feel you always have to monitor what you say, if you are with someone and you feel you can’t really express yourself and are always walking on eggshells, then it’s very likely you are in an abusive relationship which is potentially leading to a wrong marriage in all standards.
Beware of Lack of Openness In Your Partner
Many couples make the mistake of not putting everything on the table for discussion from the onset. Ask yourself, “What do I need to know to be absolutely certain I want to marry this person?” “What bothers me about this person or the relationship?” It’s very important to identify what’s bothering you, things that concern you, and things you are afraid to bring up for discussion. Then you must have an honest discussion about them. This is a great way to test the strength of your relationship. Bringing up issues when there’s conflict is a great opportunity to really evaluate how well you communicate, negotiate, and work together as a team. When people get into power struggles and blame each other, it’s an indication they don’t work well as a team. Also important is being vulnerable around each other. Ask deep questions of each other and see how your partner responds. How do they handle it? Are they defensive? Do they attack? Do they withdraw? Do they get annoyed? Do they blame you? Do they ignore it? Do they hide or rationalize it? [/b]Don’t just listen to what they say but watch for how they say it!
[i]With all this put into considerations, you could really head to a successful marriage
http://mentalhealth4muslims.com/2010/03/31/10-ways-to-marry-the-wrong-person/comment-page-2/#&panel1-5
Nice |
| Fashion / Re: Is It Bad To Wear Mens Sandals To Job Interview? They Laughed At Me [pics] by demmy0325(m): 3:51pm On Jan 14, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
my picture says it all…take heart .. Lmao.. |
| Family / Re: 6 Ways To Avoid Marrying The Wrong Person by naijaboiy: 3:47pm On Jan 14, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
in 6years to come..remember this thread  Lool...bookmarked for future use  |
| Family / Re: 6 Ways To Avoid Marrying The Wrong Person by justwise(m): 3:16pm On Jan 14, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
Choose Character over Chemistry
While chemistry and attraction are no doubt important, character precedes them both. A famous quote follows, “Chemistry ignites the fire, but character keeps it burning.” The idea of falling “in love” should never be the sole reason for marrying someone; it is very easy to confuse infatuation and lust for love. The most important character traits to look for include humility, kindness, responsibility, & happiness. Both are equally important, its marriage and not business partner, without chemistry then you can as well live as a friend. 1 Like |
| Family / Re: 6 Ways To Avoid Marrying The Wrong Person by naijaboiy: 3:09pm On Jan 14, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
you cant unfollow this thread..
a must follow
Lol...its actually a good thread...
But those points are not that important to me right now. |
| Family / Re: 6 Ways To Avoid Marrying The Wrong Person by naijaboiy: 3:06pm On Jan 14, 2015 |
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| Politics / Re: 68.8 Million Nigerians To Vote In Feb. Elections –INEC by holatin(m): 1:22pm On Jan 14, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
in your dreams in real life, but wake up from dream before you counter me |
| Romance / Re: my E Crush by Nobody: 12:14pm On Jan 14, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
already apologised owkay nice but i dont see the reason y you apologised but anyway that good. |
| Romance / Re: my E Crush by Nobody: 11:56am On Jan 14, 2015 |
lilmaxfidel:
adverse effect of alchohol  lol really,you are funny.#modify the post then tell her say na mistake!*i smell lies here |
| Romance / Re: my E Crush by Nobody: 11:32am On Jan 14, 2015 |
prettythicksme:
I cant believe lilmaxfidel open this kind thread,guy y naa?the chick wont take you serious i bet you.Y dont you email her privately that will be better than this#my advice tho adverse effect of alchohol |
