₦airaland Forum

Dat awkward moment wen u tink u r d only one at home n feels u can bathe without closing d door only to see ur housemaid askin if she shld bring ur ringing phone ..pam.

A professor was traveling by boat,on their way he
asked the sailor (Akpors) 'Do you know Biology?
Econlogy?
Zoology? Epidemology? No 'said the sailor
Professor what the hell do you know? You will die
of illitracy.1 hour later,the boat stated sinking , then
akpors looked at the professor and said,do you
know
swiminology and Escapeology from Sharkology?
No
said the professor Well that means Crocodilelogy will eat your
Headology and you will dieology with your
Knowledgeology because of your Badmouthology

Teacher: correct this sentence. I wear okada to
school.
Akpors: okada wear me go school. - "Girlfriend: Darling could u pls give me 25k for my
bathing soap? Akpors: whaaaat? Are u washing
away
your sins? Haba!!!" - Teacher:- What do you call a
Bee that live in America?
Akpors: USB - Ekaitte: My luv my bis about 2 finish wat am i gona
do? Akpors: return the BB 2 d seller and buy nokia
torch light

Akpors last week moved with his wife to Victoria
Island, Lagos.
A thief came to his house one night and threatened
to inject him with blood containing the HIV virus if
he didn't drop all the money he collected from the
bank the day before. Akpors: Are you going to leave me with the money
if I allow you to inject me with the HIVvirus? The Thief: I will not collect the money and I will
leave you.
On hearing this, he told the thief to give him 2
minutes and he went to the toilet. When he came
back from the toilet, he asked the thief to inject him
with the HIV virus. The frustrated thief injected him with the HIV virus
and left immediately. Immediately the thief left, the wife became hysterical The Wife: What the hell did you just do?
Akpors: Don't mind the silly thief, he doesn't know
that I put on a condom the other time Iwent to the
toilet

PRESENTER AKPORS:Wats ur contribution? CALLER:There is dis lady i wanted in my life shortly
after my NYSC,Bt all my efforts proved abortive, She
wouldn't pick ma calls, she would laff at me while
passin
by for reasons best known to her, 5 months later, i
was able 2 get an apartment, get a new car courtesy of a contract job i secured with a major oil
company. Now most of d missed calls i have are
hers, barrage of sms and all dat, i am confused on
wot 2 do, Plz advice me. PRESENTER AKPORS: Listen up give her a call letting
her knw
u'll be at her house in 2hrs, Wen its tym call her up
and delay for anoda 2hrs,Take a cool Shower, wear
a nice outfit and attention catching perfume, When
its tym drive 2 her house, Walk 2 her door and knock,once she
opens, with d sexiest smile u've got, look stylishly
into
her eyes, draw her slowly to urself, take ur mouth
close to her ear and whisper ''THUNDER FIRE U'

Girl: If we get married, stop smoking.
Akpors: Ok!
Girl: Drinking too.
Akpors: Ok!
Girl: N going to the night club too.
Akpors:- Yes. Girl:-You stop watchin soccer matches with yo boyz
Akpors: Okay!
Girl:- What else can u leave??
Akpors:- The idea of marrying You

c a father christmas of a school

Kkkkkk. Mumu

MAybe u r blind ni....u no c question mark der ni? Na u no go school

A boy proposed to A girl., d girl declined d proposal.d boy keeps trying
D boy den takes d girl in his boat n he sailed her to the middle of A big sea with snakes and crocodile
D boy now say, "marry me or get out of d boatl''
What wl u do if u r d girl?

Akpos thought dat LOL meAns ''lot of love'' so he sent An SMS to his. GirLfriend saying..."dear m sorry abt d deAth of ur mum,LOL!


Teacher ; pls stUdents pay attention.
Akpos; how much ma?


Doctor; do u know ur sperm count?
Akpos; I don't know sperm were dat clever


Teacher; where d hell is your maths homework?
Akpos ; it committed suicide cos it had too many problems


StAndin At museum looking At an Egyptian Mummy wit 12277BC written below it, ochuko; wat does dat mean?
Akpos;it must b r BB pin


Ochuko;I just bought a new Samsung galaxy tablet
Akpos; sorry bro,get well soon


Cook; Akpos'why did u put ur radio in d freezer
Akpos I wAnt to listen to Cool FM


TeAcher; give an example of drug Abuse?
Akpos ;panadol is a fool


Teacher;is corn oil is gotten from corn and vegetAble oil is gotten from vegetable.what is baby oil gotten frm?
Akpos;babies


Akpos;how much for haircut?
barber;N300
Akpos;how muCh for A shave?
Barber;N50
Akpos;ok, shave my head very well

teacher: why do we drink water?

Akpos; cos we can't Eat water

teacher: what wl u call ur. Mum's younger. Elder sister?

Akpos ; miniMuM n maxiMuM

Boy; I cry
Girl ; I cry
Boy ;I laugh
Girl ; I laugh
Boy ; {jumps out of d window}
Girl ; looks down n lAugh

Question frm A student

If A single teacher cAn't teAch all d subjects....Ao do u expect A single student to leArn All subjects?

lol

Wao......d funny master is NW in d building .....lots of laughter is now in d door....wish me welcome to boost my morale ;DWao......d funny master is NW in d building .....lots of laughter is now in d door....wish me welcome to boost my morale