₦airaland Forum

Divay22:
Hmmmm....she likes the both of you equally,she doesn't wanna lose you she doesn't wanna lose him...my advice....
Tell her to list Wat she likes about you and what she dislikes about you,same thing she'll do for the other guy ,she can take a week off and shouldn't talk to any of you,Tell.her to be sincere with herself,Because she can't eat her cake and have it back......
Don't self pity her, be strict,After all this she should come to a conclusion of either dating you or the other guy,Don't let her tears move you,Tell her you can't afford to share her with anybody.........
She's confused,the both of you are equal before her,whatever that happens DON'T BE HER BACK UP PLAN.....

U watch too many hollywood movies.. D girl likes op but the both of them need to start using their head... Shikena

caukerzee:
Well it goes like this; I met this girl some months ago. I instantly had a liking for her reason being that she looked so much like an old friend. We got talking and as time went on, feelings began to set it. I made my intentions clear to her about wanting to date her and she was like "let's see how it goes". We hung out a couple of times, from the signs I was getting it became obvious that she was intrested in me.
One night we got chatting on whatsApp after we came back from an outing. I asked her: "hope you had fun today? " she replied: "yes. Thanks for making my day. It was generally a good day except that I'm having issues with my boyfriend ". ["Did I just hear boyfriend ?"; I said in my mind] Trying to play it cool I said: "Sorry about that". At this point I told many thoughts began to cross my mind. Not wanting to be a girlfriend snatcher I let it pass. We continued chatting. After a few convos she asked me: "Hope you're not hurt ?" "About?" (Pretending not to know what she was talking about ): I replied. "About the boyfriend stuff? "
"Nah...why should I?"
"But I have feelings for you and would have really like if we could work out I'm sorry ".
"Now I'm going to cry in my pillow for weeks (I said jokingly )".
"Lol. You're funny ".
"Do me a favour ".
"what ?"
"You're going to be responsible for getting me the second most beautiful and amazing girl now that I can not have you".
"Lol ".
Long story short, she began trying to convince me to give it a try. Telling me how her boyfriend stays outside town and how they only see once in a while. I let her know that I can't share my woman with another man, how I can't be the side guy. She kept insisting telling me to trust her. I still let her know that more than affection I need comitment and how it's impossible to be commited to two people and all the emotional baggage that comes with it (having witness a similar scenario ). She told me to pretend I didn't know about another man in her life. She kept insisting. I then asked: "If you have a boyfriend what that make me?"
"Boyfriend": she replied. We kept going back and forth about the scenario until I told her to forget it as I cannot be a "Backup plan". She claimed I did not care about her feelings.
The following evening her roommate called me asking me what I did to her friend and how she had been crying all evening. I felt bad and asked to meet so we could talk things over. I eventually agreed to date her giving her the following terms :
1. That she figures which of us she's going to continue with and a day will come when she has to decide or it's over.
2. That she never brings him up whenever we're together.
She was very happy and took the offer. Things got off to a great start. Time went on and we increasingly got fon of each other.
The first day we kissed, she told me she was feeling guilty. Trying not to be a drama queen, I reacted cooly. I just reminded her about our agreement of not bringing stuff like that up. She cries any time we have sextet and as time went on I made her feel comfortable about sex.
The relationship went on. We had fights, we reconciled every time like every other normal relationship.
A few days ago when she was supposed to leave town to her family for the Christmas, we had our goodbye sex and all that. We said our 'byes' and 'i miss you(s)' & parted ways. Latter that evening, she called me and was crying over the phone. I told her to calm down and tell me what the matter was. She told me that what she did with me earlier in the day, she did with the other guy. My heart shattred. I was so furious and didn't know what to say. I just ended the call. She kept calling and texting to apologise saying she won't bring him up again and that she needed someone to talk to at that point that's why she called. Ignored her for a while then I replied her; if she wants us to work out, she we have to meet up and talk about our relationship should be ideally. But she seems not to be able to make up her mind. I feel this is a typical case of trying to eat your cake and have it.
What do I do?

So baba, d punnany was so sweet that you have to come to nairaland to tell how u refuse to share... Baba this ur story sef, u get journalistic problems and dat ur sex mate na better OGBANJE.

ebonflexy:
Selfishness and other parasitic female behaviours will not make her see any of this your logic right now

Ah so Freaky 101 is a lady... so I think she shld beg him a lil more to repair d phone... Cook alongside d gal in the kitchen... try to encourage ur brother and advise him on toasting skills... and pls baby Freaky 101, dnt be jealous... I can bring u home and by u an Iphone 7 if u start doing ur broda more good than bad... sorry to have to quote all u ebonyflexy... Cheers

@Freaky 101.. did u ever beg your brother to help you with money to repair ur touchpad? Do you have the wisdom to talk to your brother about ur plight with this girl using the right choice of words? wen u complain about ur phone and things are you with all due respect saying that your family is so broke that ur bro shldnt just path with 90k+ on someone he just met? Was ur sister very disrespectful wen she confronted him abt d matter? Has ur brother ever done this with another girl and do u think if u were in his shoes u might hve done at least 20k on d lady?.. Wat do u think u can do between u, ur bro and ur family to at least make d relationship work? Wen u can answer these questions brilliantly, then u wl b makin a headstart.