₦airaland Forum

Yashita:
If you go to most universities/polytechnics in Nigeria (behind schools) you’d always find a baby/foetus dumped there.

If you find one, you can pick up and report to the police then adopt her.

Stay off drugs.

glossy6:
Please where did you get your kid so easily? I am interested. Very much interested.

I know this post is old but I'm also very interested in adopting a female child. I'm a mum of 1 but don't to go through biological births again..tnx

Ay04z:
So. U mean ur younger ones don't do anything if dey re around ... I don't believe this write up jare.....

you don't have to believe it. It's her story and that's what matters.

As one first born daughter to another..I will tell you this for free.

IT WILL NEVER END! And sadly, it will not get better. I posted my ordeal in the family thread under "Ungrateful Siblings). The fact that you are beginning to realize this simply means that you are already burnout both mentally and physically. This however is also the Universe telling you to do something..You need to take action already!!!.

You see , the greatest resource is time and families know how to waste it for first born daughters. They will guilt trip you constantly for trying to do things differently or trying to better yourself, they'd rather use you as an unpaid caregiver and assistant mother.
Meanwhile your siblings are developing both social , mental and financial skills. In time, they'd begin to bring home their spouses ...that is when the real disrespect and snide remarks from both your parents ( same folks who didn't allow you to socialize or develop relevant social capabilities) and siblings begin to rear its head. They will wonder why you're not married and begin to carry your name from one church to another while also comparing you to the neighbors daughter who married a "young rich doctor". That's when everyone becomes a matchmaker for you😂.

When your parents die no one will care that you don't have a decent paying job .They will apportion the bulk of expenses to you as an "ADA". Mind you the major bulk of the family fortune/inheritance (if any) wouldn't even come to you at the demise of your parents.. It'll go to the male child 😂.

Learn from me and many others who have travelled this route. Invest in yourself. No one is coming to save you dear..You will have to take a decision regarding you OR ELSE you will remember this conversation years later when you become financially and socially inept, disgruntled and resentful wondering where your youth went. DON'T DO IT..

PUT Yourself First.

Wish you all the best❤️

Lance008:
This generation family I no understand to be honest
Brother go gossip he brother give outsiders
This words really gave me hope I went down because of family and stil been gossip by them with zero help

It's sad really but someday I hope you find yourself back up. Humans may forget but God never does. 🙌

In a short while,the religious mercenaries and goons will crawl over this post and totally miss the point. @op well said.

One mistake that has become normalized in Nigeria stems from pressure parents place on first daughters, especially regarding younger siblings.Many first daughters make huge sacrifices like with the hopes that some day,these young ones will not only reciprocate but at least show gratitude. I'll summarize a very long story.

For years, I was 'struck' with the first daughter curse.I denied myself opportunities just so my younger ones would excel,
trained everyone till they got at least a BA. (mind you , i only started a part-time programme after they had all graduated), borrowed money to send our youngest sister abroad. I even singlehandedly catered to our terminally ill parent for years etc . Why? I didn't want to bother them.I guess somewhere in my mind's eye ,I still considered them the tiny little babies that were born into my hands...

Years later, life happened and I became broke..that was when it all came tumbling down. I almost lost my mind from the shame, disrespect and abandonment. These same peeps called me names and laughed to my face.. I hoped they'd at least help with my son's fees or care ? How wrong I was...shishi I no see🙂, encouragement nko? whosai!!!. I received more help from outsiders.

However, I was determined to make it. I went back to school (I already had a first degree) to study Chinese (Mandarin), started a painting company and became a published writer. Guess who's coming back to ask for favors? Wanting my connect with power brokers I met in the course of my translation gigs both within and outside the country? The same ingrates!.

This is not a rant.
I'm not angry...
I am at peace with the entire situation. I have accepted my fate. However , I am no fo.ol and very mindful of how I expend my resources...
I know that they only want to reconnect because , well with my new found fortune, I have finally attained the status of "human being". It's sad how shallow,and materialistic we are as a people. Working with the Koreans and Chinese have thought me to not only appreciate the simple things in life but also to remain humble regardless of how much you have. I'm not perfect but I do my best.

Any way , my new mantra is simple : Fool me once...

This message is for anyone going through the pain of rejection, shame and ingratitude from loved ones, whom you invested in. Remember that it's not the people you help that would pay back. Consider it a debt to the Universe..
Wipe your tears..It will be well.Its just time it will take,but you will recover all that you lost. And when you finally do , don't forget to pour more into yourself.Like the Chinese would say:
"别担心， 一切都会好的!"❤️🙌

On a final note, success is indeed the the ultimate revenge! Hustle like your life depends on it ....cos in a way,it actually does😂

Merry Christmas y'all
我也祝你们新年快乐！

[quote author=dnawah post=118181260]:' 💕❤️

09

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