computergeek:
Ladies, let's gist.
If you ask the average 16-20-year-old to tell you what she wants in a man, it's not uncommon to hear her launch into a list of Messiah-like qualities.
It's funny to us now, but we all had similar lists at some point (some still do, and please enjoy it while it lasts).
My list scared me so much that sometimes, I felt I was going to remain single forever. Even when I prayed at night, I'd take so long reciting everything on my list so that God would know who he was sending my way. My friends and I spent a lot of time back then reading romance novels and the way the authors described the heroes fvcked up our imaginations  .
I wanted:
-Tall
-Italian half-caste with very yellow skin
-Gorgeous shoulder-length jet-black hair
- Eight packs
-Catholic like me
-Tech savvy like me
- Extremely intelligent
-Smiling and cheerful
- stinkingly rich
-God-fearing (ever lady's list features this, even the atheists )
- Cool-tempered
- light brown eyes
- full red lips (lol, I was literally dreaming for a man doll)
-Amazing in za oza room
And all the other regular stuff like loving, romantic, funny, caring, gentle, kind, and so on.
Yimnu, no be like that ooo... By the time I hit 21 - 22, me was not doing again . I just wanted someone with whom I shared a strong attraction. A decent man who had a good head on his shoulders, a steady source of income and ambition.
When my list became reasonable and meaningful, I guess I found one who checked out . Guess what? I married that "big head".
He had some of the qualities on my first list shaa, like he's Catholic and tech savvy, tall and intelligent. But uncle is not Italian, he has brown skin and he does not like smiling .
**********************
It's different when a woman decides that she does not want to get married. Marriage is not for everyone and society needs to evolve to a time when it stops shaming single ladies.
However, some who may really want to be married are getting held up by the unrealistic qualities they seek in a life partner. It's your life, sure, but only Jesus is perfect Nne. Chase attraction and compatibility and quit looking for perfection. This doesn't mean you should settle for the first shit-head that comes your way or over-lowering your standards, but let's try not to chase a reflection of our 8-year-old imaginations.
So ladies, what changed about your own list? Even if you're not married yet, give us your evolved status .
...
Pocohantas, Ishilove and Bukatyne - The three musketeers . Come and get the party started here. My babes from the Diary section, Pateffy, Tiffany07, MelaninQueen, Henriettttta, Luckygurl, Hermionegranger, Bloomingbud, Peacefulhome, y'all get in here! Lol. Funny enough, I didn't have any of these lists about physical qualities between 16-20. I don't know if it was because I saw most of the guys around me as buddies then, so I didn't crush much. But I still have Tall, dark and handsome Yoruba men topping my non existent list. Nobody should just come for me if I end up marrying a fair, average height man sha. But I doubt it. |
NYSC › Re: What are the effects of missing NYSC Clearance For A Month? by Tiffany07(op): 9:01am On Jan 04, 2020
