Enonymous:
Interview Proper
Biological mother was called in. She was quizzed on why she abandoned her daughter. Asked questions about her new husband, and why he wouldn’t take this child in. Then other general questions about the child.
Biological father was quizzed in order to compare responses. I had no fear. I had warned both parents to stick to the truth. We didn;t rehearse anything. I told them to be very honest. I had not lied in my application, and if things don’t work out, let it be so. Bio father was also married to another woman who was not committed towards this child. There had been cases of abuse and mistrust, and he made them known. Biological father admitted he’d been having difficulty because he was yet to make it in the entertainment industry. Both parents agreed that they loved their child, but were in difficult positions and were unable to raise her properly.
My wife and I were called in for final judgement.
Note: words are not exact, but hold similar meanings
First question was why we adopted the child
I explained that we saw a kid that needed care and attention. My wife added that the kid needed a home and stability. And that’s why we brought her in.
Why did you adopt her now?
Because as Canadian enthusiasts, we must abide by Canadian laws. In Nigeria, you can hold a family meeting, and adopt a kid, and raise them as your own, but that would be strange in Canada. So we commenced the adoption because we wanted to confirm with Canadian laws.
She calls you uncle and aunt? She will never see you as her parents
Yes, we understand that. We cannot force her to call us mom and dad, and we are not discouraged by it. We want it to grow on her naturally.
What if your brother wants her back after she’s in Canada?
He can’t. We’ll hold a family meeting on his head. Besides he’s signed away his parental rights to me. We won’t give her back.
What if she’s crying that she wants to go back?
She won’t. She is a part of us now. She is our daughter, and we’ll make decisions that are best for her. Her bio father could not take care of her. We couldn’t let her rot, so we took her as our own.
You don’t speak well about your brother?
I’m being sincere. He does not have the means to raise her properly.
You’re not loyal to your brother?
I love my brother, but I am loyal to my family.
Your brother has been in the entertainment industry for 12 years, he’s doing well. (Scrolls through his facebook, pointing at pictures of banky W and other Naija celebrities.) I think he can raise her.
He can’t afford to raise her. Social media is not always reality. He is my brother, I know the truth, and I am telling you the whole truth.
Then be backlash!
You do not believe in your brother. It seems because you have more money you think that you can just take his kid or do how you please. The guy does his best, he visits her 3 times every year. Both parents say they really do love her. Why are you taking her away from them?
Before we picked her up, she wasn’t even living with any of them. She was alone with people who did not consider her to be a child.
I could not say so much about this, but my family has a tradition of spending xmas together every year. So we all meet up at home, and that may have been what she believed were paternal visits
You are adopting her just for her to have access to the opportunities and benefits in Canada?
No. She started living with us in 2017, even before we heard or had interest in the express entry. (Points at evidence of school fee payments from way back)
I cannot make a decision on this because both parents still love their daughter. They have emotional ties. There should be no ties whatsoever.
It’s hard for parents to not love their own child. The parents were sincere. Even those who abandon their kids at roadsides love them, but have to face the reality of not being able to provide for them.
Do you love this child like your own?
Yes, we do. She has as much rights as our kids do. If she does not go with us, it will cause a massive void especially for our 3-year old that is very fond of her. It will be like she lost a sister.
If she doesn’t go with you to Canada, where will she return to?
Silence, for like 2 minutes…
Response: We’re uncertain about what would happen to her. She will head back to the village, where she will not be recognized as a child. (I explained some other personal stuff)
I will consult with my boss before I make a decision on this, you may leave now.
Alright. Should we wait outside.
No. Just go. We’ll contact you.
Note: There were more questions than i can recall. But most were statements presented as facts. A lot of pictures and status updates were pulled from facebook. She noted that our adoption process was a sham because it was too fast. I told her i followed the process by the book. No cut corners. She also asked how much I paid my lawyer
It was sad. So we left. Everyone was moody, but we all told the truth. I had estimated a wait period of 2 weeks. If I didn’t read from them, communication would continue. I thought they would have us take out the child. I was scared already, the little English she could speak would all crumble into nothing. All the education, effort especially from my wife, The patience to raise a child who was strange to even use a normal toilet, or sleeping on a good bed.
Well, we told our truth. We consoled ourselves with that.
We went back to the hotel, rested for a while, visited the mall, enjoyed a treat at KFC, hotel again, then headed to the airport at 11 pm for our 2:40 am flight. We layered upon our infant to avoid her catching cold. We were cold ourselves, but the airport was quite interesting so we just passed time enjoying hot coffee and tasting things we’ve never had before.
Landed Lagos 5 am. Headed to MMA 2, boarded another flight to PH, landed PH 8 am. Got home around 9.
I got an email about an update in my account, and another one about a new message. I kept trying to log in but it continued in an endless loop, telling me to choose English or French. Battery was low, but I no send. I kept at it until it opened.
Downloaded the message, Opened it up.
Dear E,
YOUR IMMIGRANT VISA(S) APPEARS READY TO BE ISSUED.
PPR - Nov 28th.
No one was going to be left behind. Our good did not kill us at last!
I am grateful to Canada for finding us worthy despite all the complications.
I am extremey grateful to my wife for all the support. It was tough for her, especially with the pregnancy, and having to cope with traveling to Accra with an infant. I knew she could do it because she’s a super woman. I intend to buy her a Tesla in canada, but she’ll rather put the money in Educational Trust Fund. I marry beta wife from self contain to Canada. I am happy to be sharing this moment with her.
I’m giving out a special shoutout to Opeyemi from the AVO group. I wont say much about her because words can’t express how much I appreciate her support. She was with me all the way from the first day I joined the AVO group. The minute I ran into the MTN office for wifi coverage, all her messages just poured in. I’m not sure why she has human flesh, she should be an angel. She’s the reason I decided to document my experience. It would be wrong to not let people know about such person.
I also want to appreciate the sticker king of April/May 2019 AOR group. You wont believe a guy I have never met sent me financial support for the accra trip. He has been asking for my address so he can load me up with Musibau bags. How can somebody be concerned about me like this 
My partner in money-making, LadyMarshall. Imagine admiring brilliance on nairaland, and ending up in thesame whatsapp group with thesame person. Faith knows everything, and she’s definitely not going to be your average everyday Canadian. Get her autograph now that you can.
The Akarakiris… I love una name die. I am extremely happy on the progress you have made so far. I know that lines will fall in pleasant places for you.
Amie, My AOR mate. She checks up on me like a thief in the night. She was my group Alobam. Thanks you for all the encouragement and support.
Foladearest (Adunnee), everything about you is dear. You are exceptional and very kind, Thank you for your love support.
The list is endless, Chigo, Rilwan, Acumen, Local Man David, Babs, The two Dibias, Quest, Frank, Lola, Toyeen, Engr Greg, Ingenim, Lawkamoa, HappyGirl, Lizzie, Gladys, Salamat, bamidele, Halima, lateefat, and many others. I thank you all for being a part of this story. We will continue to celebrate together, even unto greater heights.
For all those in AVO, I saw activity. Things will move for you very soon, Be encouraged.
Extras!
During my waiting time, I decided to start exploring income opportunities in Canada. I created a junk youtube channel which i will fully utilize when i’m ready. For now, it’s just gathering views so as to pass monetization.
I also researched on driving in canada and started a blog on it. At the moment, it seems like the blog can generate enough monthly income for my phone bills in canada. I am confident that by next year’s ending, the blog should be able to pay our monthly rent.
www.nairaland.com/attachments/10652171_screenshot20191130at00_35_57_pnge5ea84a30afdb3fc659c7118aa572501
I’m adding this here to help us understand that the wait time can be invested into something profitable. Don’t just sulk.
The End!
Congratulation on this breakthrough. I have a similar adoption situation, my AOR is August 2018 and file was transferred to AVO February 2019. I got ADR in respect of the adoption in June 2019, Up till AVO haven't contacted me. Please I would appreciate if I can get a means to contact you to ask a few questions. or you can kindly reach me on 08071112201. Thank you and congratulations once again. 1 Like |
Travel / Re: Canada Visit/tourist Visa Discussion. by toskin2003: 5:29am On Jul 21, 2023