Me

Brb

Damn...I just wasted my data....for this shit!!!

Sit her down (the perv gal) and give her your 21 rules and the need of decency.

Have u noticed that a bunch of ladies in social media now quote their ages to the 40s and 50s when their profile pic shows them to b less than 35.

What happened to the age of reducing their ages by 20 years now they increase it by 25 years.....


What's d game plan? Men still know u r younger than dat.

Damcalcaleb:
Who are they,are they couples?

In all fairness, na only u waka come

― If you didn't kill earthworm with salt.
― If you didn't play rubber band.
― If you never bathed in the rain.
― If nobody told you about India vs Nigeria 99-1.
― If you didn't sleep on the couch and wake up on the bed.
― If you didn't go 2 steal cashew and guava in d next street and the owner's dog comes through the backyard waiting for you to come down from the tree.
― if u didn't throw your milk tooth on the roof for the lizards to take it and give you new ones.
― If you didn't just wash your hands and legs instead of bathing when going to school.
― If you didn't act film in uncompleted building or under bed with friends.
― If you never flew a kite.
- If you didn't use ur two legs to build houses with sand.
- If u didn't write ur name on paper and insert it into ur pen so that no one will steal it.
- if you didn't play soccer with bottle drinks cover..
- If u didn't close d fridge door really slowly to see when d lights went off.
- If u neva waved @ white birds expectin ur nails to b whiter
- If u neva heard of a ghost dat stays under mango trees @nights
- If u didn't drive a single car Tyre with a stick and called it ur car!
- If u didnt mix garri n sugar in ur pocket and eat while walking in the street.
- If u never did mama and papa play i.e. cookin grass nd sand witout fire.
- If you didn't play table soccer. with bottle cover.....
.....then I guess ur Childhood wasn't fun!
Oya choose which one u do... include the others you did in case you don't see it in this list.

Please see what my good friend told me:
Xavier my guy, I'm tired of all this nonsense.. So because I gave Obama my phone number, I can no longer rest again.
He has been disturbing me calling me on phone, sending me text messages and just recently he added me on Whatsapp..
Imagine any small problem he encounters he 'll just rush his phone and call me for advice. Just last week Obama woke me up from my dear sleep with his phone call just to tell me that his daughter is getting married..!!!
So if Ur daughter wan marry make I run comot from Lagos ni.
2weeks ago Jay-z called me on phone apparently Obama gave him my number. Imagine small Jay-z called me to tell me that his wife Beyonce is pleading for my autograph for their child Blue Ivy...
Which kyn wahala be dis one.!
Because I gave Bill Gate money, I can no longer rest for Dangote.!! he's always coming to my house asking me to give him money which I have given him enough but he won't just stop coming.. naija greedy sha...
Now that 2015 is around the corner, countless politicians are gunning for my house and all over me telling me to help them to win the election.. Damn what's all this.

It is becoming alarming that many young girls have big hips and backyard. How did they acquire that - by drugs or did it appear over night?

I boarded a taxi and sitting next to me is this pretty orange clothed babe. Skin so smooth and her voice so cool. I started a conversation and we chatted. I took her fone number.

Along the way, I lost the number and I have not forgiven myself since.

Later I ask myself: what is this? Is it for real?

My question is still unanswered