₦airaland Forum

I'm MARCH 01...

worworgirl:
Babe how far? You no com marry that man again ? See as confusion tie person wrapper

No I haven't. That's part of it, thinking of marrying someone I don't love. I don't want to marry out of frustration or because he's just the one available. You know I have come to realize that life is not fair, loving someone who doesn't really love u, then another loving you yet you don't care.

Catalin:
What is the cause of your depression? is it lack of money or lack of job or admission/school?

it's non of the above. Let me say it's heart break

austine4real:
u beta don't kill ursef oo


life is tooo short start going out n make new friends


is like u'r n introvert?

I am an introvert, I don't really hv friends here in Port Harcourt. It's not long I relocated to ph

chimdi101:
where do you stay?

I stay in Port Harcourt

okirewaju:
Stay strong brother

Thanks... I'm a sister

I am hrt broken, depressed and sad. I feel worthless. This life makes no meaning to me anymore. I'm down emotionally and psychologically. I need help, I need someone to pour out my heart to

dingbang:
Please can u specify what sort of help you need?

I need help emotionally , psychologically and other wise. Nothing makes me happy anymore.

I am depressed, hrt broken, sad. I need friends that can help me. Sometimes I get tired of living.

I represent MARCH 01. Do I hv a birthday mate?

nnamdiokere45:
are u on any medication

No

What can make one to miss her period apart from pregnancy? Is it a serious health problem?

Thank you all

Richy4:
I will suggest you stop wasting the young man's time... Tell him honestly that it will not work..... If you do not know how to break up with him, use the ancient style...."It is not you, it's me......" at least it is true...

Why are you still holding on to him....air time he would have used to call other sisters that has been fasting and praying for any how man, he was using it to call you....Biko free him....Besides that time and age your mum was talking about, where man or a woman learn to love each other is no longer existing except in India...So do not kid yourself in holding on....

I have told him I don't love him. But he said I'm the one for him that he doesn't feel peace with another woman, that he has tried to forget about me but he couldn't. He said I should pray about it and seriously praying for someone u don't love it's difficult, I prayed but I didn't see or hear anything. I had to call our pastor to tell him that I don't love this guy. How else do I do it. I don't call him, I don't always pick his calls, I don't say I miss or love him

Diplomaticbeing:
Hahaha! See me way de find means to learn some big english from you, here you come de yab me indirectly.

On a more serious note, and on the contrary to your contribution nay counter to some of my opinions here, the OP didn't state why she doesn't find the available guy attractive. So there's no point to conclude yet. Yes, the eyes must first eat and get satisfied before any other thing follows, when one want to establish a honest and purposeful relationship with an opposite sex. But I don't think that the OP dislike his physical structure, else they wouldn't have been friends since 5 past years as she claimed (I may be wrong). If my guess is correct, then what's it that the OP doesn't find attractive about him? This necessitated my questions and counsel's to her in that first post here.

For instance, she not liking her voice on the least could be as a result of built-up prejudice. And she loving the other men that didn't love her could be because of a mundane thing like those men arrogant exhibitions instead of a good thing like their civility.

Happy Sunday.

Thank you. But what I mean by being friends for more than five years is due to the fact that we attend the same church, we used to be in the same Sunday sch class, I think I should rather use the word brethren not friends. We are just church members though I know he likes me because he gets little gift for me when I'm bk home for holidays. I hv never told him I love him, in fact the day he proposed I was shocked because we have never dated, I don't call him, I don't even know his birthday. I don't visit him in his house because I feel bored with him. I remembered there was a time I tried to love him, I told him to visit me when I was serving so as to know if we can work out something, but can you believe I barely stay up to 30mins with him without finding fault, I don't let him hold my hands, not to talk of hug, the day he tried to just put his hand on my shoulder I felt it was soldier and that was there. I warned him never to hold me or touch me. So u see I don't have any emotional feelings for him. I can be in a room with him for a month and nothing will happen.

Thank you all for the comments

NLbully:
Don't go for him if you dont love him cz your mum isn't the one to get you the man you love,just be patient and the right man will come

#Peace

Thank you

Diplomaticbeing:
@OP

Treat the fundamental issues first to avoid making a costlier future life mistake.

Firstly, could you pinpoint the actual reason(s) the men you loved dumped you (broke your heart)? There's a real need for you to better yourself first. If you have a bad attribute that had caused the men you loved to break your heart, then learn the good version of such attribute and have it as an attitude.

What's your definition of a romantic love? As ambiguous as its, yet one's ability to define what truly constitute love for oneself, is the first step towards finding a matching partner. Definiteness of purpose is very important when wishing to establish anything meaningful.

Do you know of at least 10 good attributes an opposite sex can possess that would make you stick with him in good and bad situations? This is about self-realization. . . . Only a self-realized person should talk about committing to a marriage which is a lifetime union - under sane and sincere arrangement.

The above assignment when done with honesty would enable you to know if the present guy that loves you - one whom you dislike - would make a good husband for you in the long run.

I don't see any reason why they treated me the way they did. I'm not trying to be bias here but I know I'm a good person. I have known this guy in question for more than five years, in fact we attended the same church from childhood. All this while I knew he likes me but I don't feel anything for him. I only see him as a brother and friend. Now my confusion is this, is he right one for? Is that why I have been having failed relationships? Why is he still there after all these years? Is it possible for God to give me someone I feel nothing for as a husband?

I have posted similar thing In the romance section but I'm still confused. That's why I still have to seek of the opinions of the married. A guy loves me so much and wants to get married to me but I don't love him at all. I have tried to love him but I don't seem to find anything attractive about him. Meanwhile I have loved other guys in the past who broke my heart. Now I don't want to just settle for this guy since he's still there because I seriously don't feel anything for him. His calls alone irritates me. Now my mum is forcing me to settle down with the guy, she claims I wld learn to love him, that after all the ones I love hv all disappointed me. Please help me out

emryxleena:
https://static.pulse.ng/img/incoming/origs3559230/2761855869-w640-h640/black-bride-1.jpg


Guys come up with all sorts of stories these days about marriage, when truly they actually want to do damage. As a lady you should be smart to read between the lines and see the vivid signs.
But it all lies in your hands to act and take the needed decision. It is not about dragging the horse to the water, it’s whether the horse really wants to drink.
Read these signs carefully and make them your best friend. These sure signs will help you detect the time waster from afar.


1. He says it: If your guy asks you how you want your dream wedding to be , your preferred wedding colours, ring size or likes to raise some important aspect of the wedding he is particular about, then he is definitely planning to settle down with you.

2. He plans with you in mind: Men naturally are wired to know the details and intricacies of every project they want to get involved in. Yes! project. A wedding is like a project to a man, and factors such as accommodation, career development, finances etc. are considered. The interesting thing about this is that he plans all this with you in mind. He is genuinely concerned about how these seemingly minute details will affect your life

3. He delights in your happiness: If a guy goes out of his way consistently and genuinely to do tasks or go on events he normally would not go to, just to make you happy, he is definitely gearing to pop up the marriage question. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean those “escortoryors”-professional escorts on the prowl who pretend to please you. The serious marriage minded guy does not complain about it. He does not care how he is going to look before his friends. Watch out for his body language when he is accompanying you, Is he comfortable? He might not be excited, but is he there mind, body and soul? Is he genuinely Interested in knowing more about what you love?

4. He helps you become better: A guy who is ready to get married to a woman, genuinely wants her to make progress. Guys want their women to rep them in a good way, so they want to help their women become better. He always wants to know about your career, job, hobby or craft. Does he proffer solutions to challenges that seem to weigh you down? Now I do not mean being possessive, judgemental and demeaning. Traits of jealousy and competition are a NO-NO

5. He entrusts you with his life: Hey! Ladies, this is not to say if your guy is not telling you things, he is not ready to get married. One thing you have to understand is that trust is earned. A guy who wants to get married to you, will eventually open up to you, when he finds out you are genuinely concerned about his welfare. We call it wife material. When a guy finds his “wife material” he starts asking for your opinion on everything, he opens his inner thoughts, fears and deep feelings. He practically shares his life with you. That does not mean he is not ready for marriage if he is not doing all this now. It is a gradual process. Give him time, and give him that motherly love and care without judging him.

6. Family links: If your guy wants you to meet his family, be around him at family events, meet his siblings and people he loves, he really wants to settle down with you. He has seen you as a member of his family.


7. He wants you: Guys get emotional and soft when they have found the woman they want to spend their lives with. They are not scared to let you know how they feel. He is not ashamed to tell you how much you mean to him. He is always telling you how special you are to him.

8. Kids: When your guy jokingly asks about the names of your kids, or the number of kids you want to have, he is actually considering the motherly side of the woman he wants to spend his life with. You have to understand that it takes commitment to raise kids, and for a guy to talk or joke about them often, he really means to spend his life with you.

I have seen a guy who did all of these things and still dumped the girl. Men can't be predicted

davepepple:
What is your discipline?

information science

Information science

I am graduate. Need a job in Lagos. I reside in ph presently but I want to relocate, want to change environment. Please help a sister.

Hmmm! I'm learning... Thank you all for your contributions. Guess I will tell him to wait a little more, let me use this time to see if I could love him a little because he planned to do the traditional this December

Zedoo:
Hmmm zinny.... PM me.

please how do I send a PM