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You Know You Are Nigerian If: - Culture - Nairaland

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You Know You Are Nigerian If: by Tolaaaaannni(f): 7:04pm On Aug 15, 2012
You know you are Nigerian If:

. You have ever called a stranger aunty or uncle before

. You eat rice daily or at least once a week

. You have yelled "Up Nepa!' at least once in your life.

. You have long complicated names like: Olamuyiwa, olaoluwa, Adebimpe, Gbolahan, oluwajomiloju, jesutomiwo, Chukwuemeka e.t.c

. You have names that you didn't know you had.

. Foreigners find your name difficult to pronounce.

. You have experienced Nepa take light for 48 hours straight.

. You have experienced iko (a knock on the head) or Abara (A slap on the back)

. Your parents brag about you outside, but insult you at home.

. Your parents have compared you to other people before.

. A stranger has given you money before.

. You have at least one aunty or uncle in abroad that you have never met before.

. You have stool down, or knelt down and face the wall.


Please feel free to add to this list. smiley

4 Likes

Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by Acidosis(m): 7:46pm On Aug 15, 2012
^ ^ is that your pix in your profile?
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by Nobody: 7:47pm On Aug 15, 2012
9th on d list is soo freaking true about Naija parents


You get scolded by your parents for getting an A-
You've bought gala in traffic before
You hv to wait for ur parents to bless ur edible gifts as a child b4 u eat it

1 Like

Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by ifyalways(f): 8:09pm On Aug 15, 2012
I can only relate with the NEPA stuff, the rest is not unique with just Nigerians.
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by odumchi: 1:56am On Aug 16, 2012
Nice thread! Here are some more:

You're Nigerian if:

- you call 'q tips' 'cotton board'

- you spit on your fingers before you count your money or turn a page

- you stand with two hands behind your back

- your parents click their tongue in annoyance

- you eat Agege or Our Lady bread

- your elder brother returns only with bread after spending years in the city

- you turn your back to count your money

- you keep your money in your underwear

- you feed your dogs fesis

- you think RSVP means rice and stew very plenty

- everyone in your community owns a generator


grin

1 Like

Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by MrsChima(f): 3:34am On Aug 16, 2012
odumchi: Nice thread! Here are some more:

You're Nigerian if:

- you call 'q tips' 'cotton board'

[size=22pt]- you spit on your fingers before you count your money or turn a page[/size]

- you stand with two hands behind your back

- your parents click their tongue in annoyance

- you eat Agege or Our Lady bread

- your elder brother returns only with bread after spending years in the city

- you turn your back to count your money

- you keep your money in your underwear

- you feed your dogs fesis

- you think RSVP means rice and stew very plenty

- everyone in your community owns a generator


grin

My husband does that ALL THE TIME!!! grin grin And with that same finger he always try grab my face to kiss me!! Eew!! angry
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by nairamanforever: 9:59am On Aug 16, 2012
You're Nigerian if:

- You have taken okada atleast once in your life

- You have bribed an official before

- You have wished you werent nigerian before
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by Eiregirl(f): 11:52am On Aug 16, 2012
odumchi: Nice thread! Here are some more:

You're Nigerian if:

- you call 'q tips' 'cotton board'

- you spit on your fingers before you count your money or turn a page

- you stand with two hands behind your back

- your parents click their tongue in annoyance

- you eat Agege or Our Lady bread

- your elder brother returns only with bread after spending years in the city

- you turn your back to count your money

- you keep your money in your underwear

- you feed your dogs fesis

- you think RSVP means rice and stew very plenty

grin grin grin grin
- everyone in your community owns a generator


grin
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by PhysicsQED(m): 12:13pm On Aug 16, 2012
odumchi: Nice thread! Here are some more:

You're Nigerian if:


- you feed your dogs fesis


Dog ownership is rare among Nigerians, but who among those that do own dogs actually feeds them 'fesis'? That doesn't sound like it makes sense.
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by Nobody: 2:54pm On Aug 16, 2012
i was scared too oo, i was like nobody feeds dog feces in Nigeria, hmmm some ppl sef ehn undecided
HABA, Naija dog that would not even eat rice if you don't mix it with meat, fish, pedigree or foetus...KAI! Our dogs back home like too much shakara
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by Tolaaaaannni(f): 4:12pm On Aug 16, 2012
odumchi: Nice thread! Here are some more:

- you feed your dogs fesis

Lol at dog feces. haba now, nigerians are not that wicked.But all the other stuff were spot on.
Shollypopz: 9th on d list is soo freaking true about Naija parents


You get scolded by your parents for getting an A-
You've bought gala in traffic before
You hv to wait for ur parents to bless ur edible gifts as a child b4 u eat it
Omg, that is so true, i remember when i was in high school i was punished for getting a B in Maths. shocked

nairamanforever: You're Nigerian if:

- You have taken okada atleast once in your life

- You have bribed an official before

- You have wished you werent nigerian before

Nice one.
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by yamakuza: 7:03pm On Aug 16, 2012
PhysicsQED:

Dog ownership is rare among Nigerians, but who among those that do own dogs actually feeds them 'fesis'? That doesn't sound like it makes sense.

they actually do, in the villages.

read it somewhere in Things Fall Apart or one of those books ...

Nursing mothers used to keep dogs so they wont have to clean up the poo from their babies.

That was probably before pampers got to the villages.
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by bittyend(m): 7:15pm On Aug 16, 2012
I've never done all these things, does that mean I'm not Nigerian? shocked

I bleed GREEN WHITE GREEN, that's the most important thing! cool
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by odumchi: 7:17pm On Aug 16, 2012
PhysicsQED:

Dog ownership is rare among Nigerians, but who among those that do own dogs actually feeds them 'fesis'? That doesn't sound like it makes sense.


In the countryside, dogs are traditionally fed feces along with other scraps they are given, lol.
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by MrsChima(f): 8:18pm On Aug 16, 2012
No wonder those dogs breath was shitty!!!
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by kengis: 10:23pm On Aug 16, 2012
You know you are nigerian
If when you are around nigerians your accent gets thicker
If you have a lot of relatives in London or Texas
If you or yours parents have stereotypes about another nigerian tribes
If you get slapped or yelled at for handing things to your elders with your left hand
If you can hear your parents talking on the phone from the outside
If not properly greet an elder land you into trouble
If you arrive hours late at an African party and they are still just getting started*
If Nigeria comes on the news you go and turn up the volume on tv
If you know who genevieve Nnaji is

1 Like

Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by kengis: 10:40pm On Aug 16, 2012
You know you are nigerian
If you go to the store and your mum ,your sister or your aunty start talking about a person's outfit or hairstyle really loudly and then cussing in your language
If you ever had your ear pulled for asking a question
If your parents brag about your accomplishments to their friends
If you ever had to kneel down and raise your hands
If your parents want you to be a doctor ,a lawyer or a nurse

2 Likes

Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by Tolaaaaannni(f): 11:31pm On Aug 16, 2012
^^^ Those are so true! grin grin. Especially the career and the store thing.
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by PhysicsQED(m): 12:01am On Aug 17, 2012
yamakuza:

they actually do, in the villages.

read it somewhere in Things Fall Apart or one of those books ...

Nursing mothers used to keep dogs so they wont have to clean up the poo from their babies.

That was probably before pampers got to the villages.




odumchi:


In the countryside, dogs are traditionally fed feces along with other scraps they are given, lol.


Damn that's gross.

Nigerians don't give a sh1t about dogs. undecided
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by dyabman(m): 7:31am On Sep 02, 2012
if you ever cry b4 goin 2 skul back in nursery nd primary sch.
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by Nobody: 8:54pm On Sep 02, 2012
odumchi: Nice thread! Here are some more:

You're Nigerian if:

- you spit on your fingers before you count your money or turn a page
- you turn your back to count your money
grin
lol
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by OkikiOluwa1(m): 12:14am On Sep 03, 2012
I neva laf o! All d post no funny reach.
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by Nobody: 12:24am On Sep 03, 2012
^^why u no post ur own wey funny naa angry
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by Tolaaaaannni(f): 12:37am On Sep 03, 2012
Okiki_Oluwa: I neva laf o! All d post no funny reach.

I don't think the post were meant to make you laugh,considering that this is not the joke section. If you are looking for something that will make you laugh, i would recommend you click on the joke section.
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by OkikiOluwa1(m): 3:02pm On Sep 03, 2012
*Shollypopz:
^^why u no post ur own wey funny naa angry
@shollypopz to fine, no mind me buh d thread & d posts neva komot d lafter 4rm my body. D thread s okay sha!

Tolaaaaannni:

I don't think the post were meant to make you laugh,considering that this is not the joke section. If you are looking for something that will make you laugh, i would recommend you click on the joke section.
u no need waka go joke section b4 u crack ur ribs. I saw a thread & posts dat was written 2 amuse d readers & d tin no just shack me lyk odas.
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by Tolaaaaannni(f): 10:03pm On Sep 03, 2012
u no need waka go joke section b4 u crack ur ribs. I saw a thread & posts dat was written 2 amuse d readers & d tin no just shack me lyk odas.
undecided I guess everything isn't meant to be funny. We all have different sense of humor, what's funny to me might be lame to you. It only makes us human.
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by dyabman(m): 1:24pm On Sep 06, 2012
TOLANI !, TOLANI !! , TOLANI !!!
Re: You Know You Are Nigerian If: by Tolaaaaannni(f): 12:16am On Sep 07, 2012
dyabman: TOLANI !, TOLANI !! , TOLANI !!!
Whats up? kilode? se ina jo ni?

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