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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / Simplfied English? (853 Views)
Simplfied English? by folanusi(m): 5:21am On Jan 03, 2008 |
European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English'. In the first year, the letter 's' will replace the soft 'c'. creating words like Sertainly & sivil servants. The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter. In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away. By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v'. During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a real sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas. If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. Peas and lov to yu. Let us all start speaking this simplified English |
Re: Simplfied English? by Migines(m): 8:10am On Jan 03, 2008 |
Its d best thing for everybody. |
Re: Simplfied English? by brimbrack(m): 9:10am On Jan 03, 2008 |
ze konfusion of englisk languag vill no longa pose a froblem fo oda uropian nations |
Re: Simplfied English? by Lolabbey: 12:03pm On Apr 07, 2009 |
dis is a gud 1.am gona adopt dis no mor bein sorry bt sory no mor lateness bt latenes no mor actually bt aktualy i tink i lik dis |
Re: Simplfied English? by Moyola(f): 12:07pm On Apr 07, 2009 |
hehe!! Zhis iz a feli 9z wey tu speek! |
Re: Simplfied English? by romsky: 12:08pm On Apr 07, 2009 |
spokes on |
Re: Simplfied English? by Lolabbey: 12:12pm On Apr 07, 2009 |
comot 4 rod jo,let me pose 4 my wedin fotograf |
Re: Simplfied English? by romsky: 12:19pm On Apr 07, 2009 |
u expekt me to accept ur komplicated fiz pose? |
Re: Simplfied English? by Moyola(f): 12:20pm On Apr 07, 2009 |
Yels nau! |
Re: Simplfied English? by romsky: 12:24pm On Apr 07, 2009 |
tufia |
Re: Simplfied English? by Lolabbey: 12:48pm On Apr 07, 2009 |
werin apen |
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