Hmmmmmmmm, wonders shall never end. Recently, a struggling couple won Visa lottery and everybody was happy that at last solution has come to their problems, but little did they know that it was the beginning of some startling revelations and problems in the marriage.

The requirement for granting the visa is that there should be a DNA test to confirm the paternity of the children. The test was conducted and it was discovered that two of the children are not the husband's children. This has caused a lot of stress in the home.

If you were the husband, what would you do?

I don't believe a DNA test is required for visa processing, which leads me to doubt your story

tuneh

@Tuneh

I've never really had to deal with those idiots at the american embassy b/4 but i know that when my uncle went for his residence visa, paternity test via DNA was required and it was performed on all their children b/4 visa was granted. The only thing i wondered was why DNA test was so expensive in Nigeria. Even i can perform one with all the equipment available, especially the gel and the electrophoresic slabs. Nigerian scientists need to wake up.

I think tuneh is cute, i like the simplicity.

tuneh:

I don't believe a DNA test is required for visa processing, which leads me to doubt your story

tuneh

Now that you have heard from another person, i hope you will believe now. So to the question, if you were the husband, what would be your response?

He he he he he he he!!!

E don happen!!!

In Nigeria especially, about 50% of children in any giving home do not belong to the "man" of the house.  IF DNA tests were to be carried out on all children in Nigeria, it would be a national shocker to see what the results would be. 

Let us just say that too much keeping of "night vigils" could be detrimental to most marriages.

watched a yoruba movie and this was exactly the story !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! am serious.

almondjoy:

He he he he he he he!!!

E don happen!!!

In Nigeria especially, about 50% of children in any giving home do not belong to the "man" of the house. IF DNA tests were to be carried out on all children in Nigeria, it would be a national shocker to see what the results would be.

Let us just say that too much keeping of "night vigils" could be detrimental to most marriages.

But if what Almondjoy said is true, should the children of such people become victim of the situation, knowing well that they are not the architects of the situations surrounding their birth? And when will the women folk know how to preserve the sanctity of the home?

The children should not be made to suffer for what happened. It is not their fault. As much as you try to be objective, one cannot help but be sad and angry at the betrayal. Some people will say I will love the children just the same after all, I considered them my children from when they were born.

Others will simply walk away. I personally wouldn't. I'm not in that situation and I say it as an outsider but God help me to make the right decision if it ever happens to me. I wouldn't walk away from them. I don't know if the woman and I will be together again but I cannot break the bond that I have with the children.

I for once agree with Almondjoy on this. There are lots of fathers who are taking care of other peoples children. Sadly one only finds out in cases like this. This isn't Maury Povich saying 'you are not the father'

I wouldn't particularly blame just the women because men also have children outside their marriages. It sucks either way you look at it but a man gets away with his philandering if he has the resources to take of both sets of children.

My own beef is that I guess some of the women who are quick to label men as cheats are not so clean/careful after all.

Oga o this sounds like a Maury show.

Well, if i was the dad - i would really just move out cause looking at the kids would be constant reminders.

And if i was the mother, i would just move to America and start my life all over.

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-13738.0.html

Read the above link

almondjoy:

He he he he he he he!!!

E don happen!!!

In Nigeria especially, about 50% of children in any giving home do not belong to the "man" of the house. IF DNA tests were to be carried out on all children in Nigeria, it would be a national shocker to see what the results would be.

In essence 50% of the children in your house do not belong to your dad, i love that line of reasoning, talk is cheap they say, have a lovely day ahead baby

aysometin:

watched a yoruba movie and this was exactly the story !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! am serious.

Exactly! i watched dat movie on Africa Magic. . . anyway, shit happens!

@ poster! not 2 under-estimate ur story but DNA for Visa Lottery i dont really agree with dat though but if 4 other reasons yeah maybe but when Visa Lottery is in question dont think so except dere is a disput btw either d man or his wife. And besides d woman begin d biological mother regardless d father still has d right to her kids so dat is justifiable 4 a visa to b issued to them.

Personal Opinion" if i was d man in question and all dis yrs i have treated d children like mine i wouldnt stop doin dat cos i have played a fatherly role in their lives already. And 4 d woman in question i would b dissappointed with her for keepin d truth 4rm me all dis yrs. i would go ahead and finish d visa processin and eventually if it doesnt work out would legally give her a divorce but if it does would keep livin with her like nothin happened

Besides 2 err is human ,

Sista longest time

niceuzor:

Sista longest time

"Hey Happy New Yr"! How Bodi?

CAN ANY ONE SPEAK FOR THE CHILDREN, HOW WILL THEY HANDLE THE NEWS THAT THEY MAN THEY CALLED DADDY IS NOT DADDY AFTERALL, WELL FOR ME HOW I WILL HANDLE THE MATTER WILL DEPEND ON HOW WE AS A "FAMILY" DECIDES ON THE ISSUE, THE WOMAN,CHILDREN AND ME, WE WILL HOLD A CONFERENCE ON THE MATTER BEFORE TAKING IT TO THE EXTENDED FAMILY LEVEL,

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, I am amaze that the stories we some time watch on the TV is real. But Infidelity is a crime against God and humanity. For me I shall not accept what does not belong to me. The child most be return to the father and I can only be responsible if the father so wish. The woman that was impregnated by another man without prior knowledge of the situation by the husband can kill the husband. What it mean is that the wife does not have true love for husband rather is love is for material things and gains.
The highest sacrifice I could do is just to walk away, I mean give them some property to maintain them and wish them luck.
But May God forbid this!

Hmmmmmmmm, wonders shall never end. Recently, a struggling couple won Visa lottery and everybody was happy that at last solution has come to their problems, but little did they know that it was the beginning of some startling revelations and problems in the marriage.

The requirement for granting the visa is that there should be a DNA test to confirm the paternity of the children. The test was conducted and it was discovered that two of the children are not the husband's children. This has caused a lot of stress in the home.

If you were the husband:

1. what would you do, first to the wife?

2. What would you do to the children?

what would the US embassy do to that family (husband, wife and children)?

stoneman91:

CAN ANY ONE SPEAK FOR THE CHILDREN, HOW WILL THEY HANDLE THE NEWS THAT THEY MAN THEY CALLED DADDY IS NOT DADDY AFTERALL, WELL FOR ME HOW I WILL HANDLE THE MATTER WILL DEPEND ON HOW WE AS A "FAMILY" DECIDES ON THE ISSUE, THE WOMAN,CHILDREN AND ME, WE WILL HOLD A CONFERENCE ON THE MATTER BEFORE TAKING IT TO THE EXTENDED FAMILY LEVEL,

You mean you will seat the children and tell them that their mother has been jumping from one bed to another? Well, i guess the children should be spared the dirty details o, especially, if they are still young.

question:

what would the US embassy do to that family (husband, wife and children)?

It's simple now. They lost the chance for giving false information on the paternity of the children. You know those people want any excuse to refuse you visa.

chiegemba:



Personal Opinion" if i was d man in question and all this years i have treated d children like mine i wouldnt stop doin that because i have played a fatherly role in their lives already. And 4 d woman in question i would b dissappointed with her for keepin d truth from me all this years. i would go ahead and finish d visa processin and eventually if it doesnt work out would legally give her a divorce but if it does would keep livin with her like nothin happened

Besides 2 err is human ,

Is it really possible to live with a woman after doing that to you? please , let's be realistic. it will be tormenting to do that.

jintujinta:

You mean you will seat the children and tell them that their mother has been jumping from one bed to another? Well, i guess the children should be spared the dirty details o, especially, if they are still young.

It's simple now. They lost the chance for giving false information on the paternity of the children. You know those people want any excuse to refuse you visa.

Is it really possible to live with a woman after doing that to you? please , let's be realistic. it will be tormenting to do that.

Yes it is that's when your forgivin nature should come 2 play a role as a believer of Christ that's what should b practiced because if Our Heavenly Father does 4give our sins how much more u being human 4give human like yourself. I never said it would b easy i just said its possible, very possible as a matter of fact

There is nothing hidden under the surface of the sun, so or later the truth shall prevail.

[size=16pt]Medical Information[/size]
[size=14pt]Information Sheet For Genetic (DNA) Testing[/size]

This information sheet is free and can be obtained any Monday, Tuesday, Thursday or Friday during business hours from the US. Consulate.

The testing program allows a DNA sample to be collected from the beneficiary in Nigeria and from the petitioner in the United States.

HOW TO PROCEED

The beneficiary is advised to read this information sheet and discuss pursuing DNA testing with the petitioner. If the petitioner and beneficiary both wish to proceed with DNA testing, the beneficiary must complete the agreement on page 2 and return it to the Consulate on any business day except Wednesday at 12 noon.

INFORMATION FOR THE PETITIONER IN THE UNITED STATES

The petitioner must contact a laboratory indicated on the attached list for information concerning the buccal swab DNA testing method. This method (removing a small amount of genetic material from the inside of the mouth) is simple, clean, non-invasive, and provides the same level of accuracy as blood testing. DNA testing for applicants in Nigeria can only be performed with specimens collected using the buccal swab procedure, because blood samples cannot be transported from Nigeria to the United States in a timely fashion. The laboratory in the US. must notify the Consulate when the DNA sample has been taken and all fees have been paid. The petitioner must also arrange for the laboratory to send a buccal swab collection kit for each beneficiary to the Consulate in Lagos at one of the following addresses:

US Consulate
8300 Lagos Place
Washington, D.C. 20521-8300
(delivery within 2-3 weeks)

or

Consulate of the United States of America
2 Walter Carrington Crescent,
Victoria Island, Lagos
ATTN: Immigrant Visa Section
(for delivery via courier services)

When test results are available, the originals must be mailed directly to the US. Consulate by the US. laboratory. The cost of testing and all expenses related to testing are the responsibility of the petitioner and beneficiary.

INFORMATION FOR THE BENEFICIARY IN NIGERIA

Approximately one month after the buccal swab kit has been sent to Lagos, the beneficiary should begin checking with the Consulate to confirm the kit's arrival and to schedule an appointment with a Consulate panel physician. The petitioner and the beneficiary must initiate and pursue the testing procedure and they are responsible for paying all related fees. In Nigeria, all fees must be paid in advance of service.

On the appointment day, the beneficiary must appear in person with two color passport photographs and a valid passport. Failure to produce satisfactory documentation will result in delays. The beneficiary must pay a fee to the panel physician at the time of sample collection. The current fee is 3,000 Naira for up to two applicants, and 1,500 Naira for each additional applicant.

Test samples will be sealed in a secure container for shipment to the United States. The panel physician will receive payment from the beneficiary for courier delivery of the test sample to the selected US. laboratory for comparison with the petitioner's sample. The current fee for courier service is 6,430 Naira. In instances where a petitioner has arranged for samples to be collected from several beneficiaries, the courier fee for the shipment of kits may be higher.

If the genetic test results support the claimed relationship, the consular section will invite the beneficiary to the Consulate to notify him/her of the positive results and to complete remaining documentation. If the beneficiary is not otherwise ineligible, an immigrant visa will be issued upon payment of the appropriate fee.

If the genetic test results indicates the claimed relationship does not exist, the petition will be returned to the Immigration and Naturalization Service in the United States accompanied by a recommendation by the consular section that the petition be revoked. The case will be closed and no further documents or evidence will be accepted by the Consulate.

PLEASE NOTE THE FOLLOWING:

*
[size=14pt]Genetic testing is voluntary[/size];
*
DNA testing for applicants in Nigeria can only be performed with specimens collected using the buccal swab procedure;
*
The cost of testing and all expenses relating to testing (such as doctors' fees, mailing fees, purchase of buccal swab testing packages, etc.) are the responsibility of the petitioner and beneficiary and must be paid in advance;
*
The Consulate does not provide refunds for unused DNA kits;
*
For purposes of visa issuance, the Consulate will only accept original genetic test results that have been sent to the Consulate directly by the laboratory conducting the test. This is to ensure all necessary safeguards in conformity with US. visa regulations are followed;
*
The Consulate does not assume responsibility for the professional caliber or practice of any of the AABB (American Association of Blood Banks) accredited parentage testing laboratories;
*
Submitting to testing in no way guarantees the subsequent issuance of an immigrant visa;
*
While the genetic test is pending, all other investigations related to the case will be suspended until the testing process is completed;
*
Petitions returned to the Immigration and Naturalization Service (INS) in the United States based on negative results may be revoked or denied by the INS. The Consulate reminds all applicants that penalties exist for making false statements in the filing of immigrant visa applications.

Source: http://nigeria.usembassy.gov/genetic_dna_testing.html

From the post above, it's clear that one of the following is true:

1. The poster either was not privy to all the details of what transpired between the couple and the US embassy, or he willfully posted a hypothetical scenario or simply, fiction.

2. The information found here, on the website of the United States Diplomatic Mission to Nigeria is false.


Note that all diversity visas fall under the category of immigrant visas.

RichyBlacK:

From the post above, it's clear that one of the following is true:

1. The poster either was not privy to all the details of what transpired between the couple and the US embassy, or he willfully posted a hypothetical scenario or simply, fiction.

2. The information found here, on the website of the United States Diplomatic Mission to Nigeria is false.


Note that all diversity visas fall under the category of immigrant visas.

I am not really close to the couple in question but the reliable information has it that they needed to do the DNA test, that was why they did it in the first place. I believed it because i know that all nations are trying to curb child trafficking and impersonation. I also know that a couple also said they were asked to do DNA before they could take their children to the UK after winning the HSMP. Every possible effort is directed at stopping child trafficking and abuse, so anything is possible.

DNA is usually ordered when there are some doubts by the consular officer to whether or not the child or children belong to the couple has claimed. They will usually have their reasons.

So it is not compulsory but can be mandated if there is a reasonable suspicion that the child does not belong to them as claimed.

jintujinta:

I am not really close to the couple in question but the reliable information has it that they needed to do the DNA test, that was why they did it in the first place. I believed it because i know that all nations are trying to curb child trafficking and impersonation. I also know that a couple also said they were asked to do DNA before they could take their children to the UK after winning the HSMP. Every possible effort is directed at stopping child trafficking and abuse, so anything is possible.

Even if they order DNA test (wonder why when their website clearly states that it's voluntary ), a DNA test does not imply a paternity test! That it is revealed that the man is not the father of the child cannot imply fraud (child trafficking, etc) by the couple, since the husband is likely to be as surprised as the consular officer over such a revelation. This of course assumes that the consular officer is convinced that they are a married couple. Such a revelation shows that the wife is an adulteress.

Question: Was the DNA test ordered for only the man? If so, why? Why not the woman?

If this story is true, the US consular office may be using the adultery of a wife as grounds for visa disqualification. As long as the marriage of the couple is not in doubt, using the DNA test result from the woman and children, will sidestep the issue of infidelity on the part of the wife and focus on the issue of parentage.

I wonder if those ignorant Americans cannot distinguish infidelity from child trafficking.

vigasimple:

DNA is usually ordered when there are some doubts by the consular officer to whether or not the child or children belong to the couple has claimed. They will usually have their reasons.

So it is not compulsory but can be mandated if there is a reasonable suspicion that the child does not belong to them as claimed.

But this is not the same as a paternity test! That is, if the test showed that the man is not the father of a child, but that the woman is the mother of the said child, how does it make any sense for them to be denied the visa based on that?

jintujinta (m)
Nigeria
Posts: 158

Online

  Re: Visa Lottery Reveals Wife's Infidelity
« #6 on: January 11, 2008, 02:44 PM » 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Quote from: almondjoy on January 10, 2008, 11:35 PM
He he he he he he he!!!

E don happen!!!

In Nigeria especially, about 50% of children in any giving home do not belong to the "man" of the house.  IF DNA tests were to be carried out on all children in Nigeria, it would be a national shocker to see what the results would be. 

Let us just say that too much keeping of "night vigils" could be detrimental to most marriages.


But if what Almondjoy said is true, should the children of such people become victim of the situation, knowing well that they are not the architects of the situations surrounding their birth?

And when will the women folk know how to preserve the sanctity of the home?

Human nature can only try to preserve sanctity. Men have violated the sanctities of their matrimonial homes since time immemorial. So this is no different because it involves a woman. I guess the family has 2 options. Stay together and work it out or split!

There is no sanctity to preserve in this instance, since all rules have been broken.  All a woman can do is "damage control".  Be honest with the man and let the chips fall where they may.  To make up for such an "indiscretion" is up to how the man takes it and how attached he is to the child or children.  However, the most important thing here is the welfare of these children who are caught up in these situation.  That comes first! Not the man or the woman. It is really none of the children's business the way they are conceived is it?

mazaje (m)
B4 in Cyprus now in Finland
Posts: 793

Offline

  Re: Visa Lottery Reveals Wife's Infidelity
« #10 on: January 13, 2008, 06:02 PM » 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Quote from: almondjoy on January 10, 2008, 11:35 PM
He he he he he he he!!!

E don happen!!!

In Nigeria especially, about 50% of children in any giving home do not belong to the "man" of the house.  IF DNA tests were to be carried out on all children in Nigeria, it would be a national shocker to see what the results would be. 


In essence 50% of the children in your house do not  belong to your dad,  i love that line of reasoning, talk is cheap they say, have a lovely day ahead baby

Maybe!  We never did any DNA tests and my father does not intend to!  All are happily accounted for and it is too late to do that now.  In any case if that was the case, I don't think at this stage it would matter much to him since both have been through thick and thin together and have made a decision to stay married for the love of each other!

I love my brothers and sister and do not really care who the real daddy/ies or mommy/ies is or are!  Life is great!

Personally, in my own case, Mr. Almondo made sure all his kids had DNA tests right in the hospitals there with blood type and all.  I wonder why?   I guess trust is hard to establish these days.

_{Which one "consine" me sef?}

So far he has been pleased with the results---I had no doubts anyway.  A woman always knows her baby daddies even before conception!

almondjoy:

Maybe! We never did any DNA tests and my father does not intend to! All are happily accounted for and it is too late to do that now. In any case if that was the case, I don't think at this stage it would matter much to him since both have been through thick and thin together and have made a decision to stay married for the love of each other!

I love my brothers and sister and do not really care who the real daddy/ies or mommy/ies is or are! Life is great!

Personally, in my own case, Mr. Almondo made sure all his kids had DNA tests right in the hospitals there with blood type and all. I wonder why? I guess trust is hard to establish these days.

_{Which one "consine" me sef?}

So far he has been pleased with the results---I had no doubts anyway. A woman always knows her baby daddies even before conception!

Hmmm, i dont mean to be personal but i just want to ask this: did you not feel offended by his action?

jintujinta:

Hmmm, i don't mean to be personal but i just want to ask this: did you not feel offended by his action?

Why should I feel offended?  In real life it takes a lot to offend me. I really take life easy. Only the guilty are afraid and full of defenses.  I had nothing to hide and I welcomed the idea to avoid any "switching" baby syndrome. There has been cases of baby switching in many hospitals over here and I definitely would want to know that my kids are mine.  Not down the road without explanation.

There are many ways to establish trust.  Especially with an African man.

@richyblack and co-doubters,

yes, the embassy website said that dna testing is voluntary but in reality, the consular staff will always demand it for a family applying under visa lottery. this is because nigerians have so abused and bastardized the visa lottery. people actually pay visa lottery winners to take their kid to their relatives in the us by pretending the kid belongs to the visa lottery winners. in some families, the visa lottery winner is made to present his sister or her brother to the embassy as the spouse so that the sibling can escape to america - i personally know one family who did such. the siblings will now divorce themselves after they obtain green card.

it was because of all these things that the us embassy now has an informal rule that visa lottery winners claiming to have kids must present dna to prove the kids is theirs.