STATEN ISLAND, N.Y. -- Brigitte Harris never had a childhood.

Abandoned by her mother in a Park Hill apartment at age 2, she was shuffled between homes and abusive relatives on Staten Island, Long Island, Rhode Island and Liberia. She was repeatedly molested, raped and beaten by a father who was supposed to protect her. She was betrayed by a family who likely knew what was happening, but neither said nor did anything to stop it.

It wasn't until Ms. Harris killed her father two and a half years ago that she finally started to get the help she needed -- and the chance for a better future.

Ms. Harris, who is now 29, lured her 55-year-old father, St. George resident Eric Goodridge, into her Far Rockaway apartment on June 28, 2007. After wrestling Goodridge to the ground, she handcuffed him, stuffed a towel in his mouth, and then severed his penis with a scalpel.

During her murder trial in September, Ms. Harris told a jury she did not mean to kill him -- just "take away his weapon" so he could not use it again. They found her guilty of the lesser charge of second-degree manslaughter, and acquitted her of more serious charges of second-degree murder and first-degree manslaughter.

They found her story so compelling that seven members of the panel wrote to the judge to ask that he sentence her to time served so she can get psychiatric help.

But Judge Arthur Cooperman sentenced her to the maximum five to 15 years in Queens Supreme Court Friday anyway.

In an interview with the Advance, Ms. Harris said she should have sought an alternative to the brutal act.

CLICK HERE FOR AN EXCLUSIVE VIDEO OF HER JAILHOUSE INTERVIEW.

"I don't think killing him was the answer," Ms. Harris said. "I can't believe I actually did it. The only thing I had in my mind was to stop him."

"I probably should have talked to someone earlier. So many people say it's not your fault, but you don't believe them," she added.

Ms. Harris spoke about preparing for a life ahead she never thought she would have. During her time at the Rikers Island Correctional Facility in Queens, she has been learning culinary arts and taking college-level classes through the Prison Education Initiative (PEI). She gets regular psychiatric treatment -- Ms. Harris was diagnosed with severe post-traumatic stress disorder and a personality disorder -- and medication.

When she gets out, she said she would like to work with the advocacy group, STEPS to End Family Violence, and tell others about her experience. She also wants to finish college and open a restaurant.

"I was a totally different person then. I've been able to tell my story to so many people now," she added.

The first time Ms. Harris ever received professional help was when she checked herself into the psychiatric ward at Bayley Seton Hospital in Clifton on the night of the murder. Until then, she had always been suspicious of authority figures.

Ms. Harris tried to tell relatives about the unspeakable things her father was doing to her, including her sister Carleen Goodridge, who claims she was also being sexually abused by their father. No one wanted to hear it.

In the close-knit Liberian expatriate community in Park Hill, rumors spread about the Goodridge family's dark secret. Several members of the community, who spoke with an Advance reporter at the time of the killing, said they had suspicions.

"A lot of people spoke about it. It's hard to keep a secret around here," said one man who identified himself as a friend of Goodridge.

Ms. Harris had reason to believe the police could not help. Goodridge was charged on Staten Island with reckless endangerment in 1978 and menacing in 1982. Both charges resulted in no convictions. Police were also called to the family's home on Long Island several times on reports of domestic abuse, but no charges were brought against her father, according to documents released at the trial.

Ms. Harris she had to take matters into her own hands when she discovered her father intended to take her 7-year-old niece to his native Liberia two summers ago. That was where much of the abuse had taken place. Goodridge was staying with Carleen and her three children in her Daniel Low Terrace apartment at the time.

"I knew exactly what I had gone through and I couldn't see it happening to another generation. It just had to stop," Ms. Harris said.

During the three-week trial, Ms. Harris appeared calm when she described the hellish childhood that led to a frenzied plan to cut off her father's penis. She first tried with a pair of scissors, then with a scalpel she purchased on the Internet. She burned the severed penis on the stove, and tossed it under a Far Rockaway boardwalk, she said, so it could not be reattached.

The trial was "humiliating," Ms. Harris said, but also proved to be therapeutic. For the first time in her life, she felt people believed her. When the verdict came back, she nearly cracked a smile.

Ms. Harris was smiling often during her interview with the Advance. She doesn't know if she'll ever be able to have an intimate relationship with anyone, or a family of her own, she said. She still has trouble sleeping, and will likely be haunted by her memories forever. But she is optimistic about her future.

"I'm pretty sure I'm going to be OK," she said.

Peter N. Spencer covers City Hall for the Advance. He can be reached at spencer@siadvance.com.
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http://www.silive.com/news/index.ssf/2009/11/childhood_hell_then_revenge_--.html

NICE JOB WOMAN. I love ur courage ,enough is enough."IF POLICE NO WORK,SCISSORS AND RAZOR BLADE MUST WORK" . Lol

Good for that incestous beast of a father! Of all the women wey full america, na him children sweet am pass....DOGTARD!

When I read the stupid comments here I really wonder at the level of people that post. Then I remembered, these are the people that lynch people on the roadsides.

Johndoe100: When I read the stupid comments here I really wonder at the level of people that post. Then I remembered, these are the people that lynch people on the roadsides.

what's your point?

Johndoe100: When I read the stupid comments here I really wonder at the level of people that post. Then I remembered, these are the people that lynch people on the roadsides.

agreed.