I woke up this morning,the only recurring thought in my head is this: basically i went to school like any other Nigerian,after my tertiary education i started working for a multi-national,the pay was good such that when i was preparing for my wedding i only told my parent when the wedding date was two month's time.

After my wedding,life continued the same way;i was moving up the corporate ladder,things became challenging: i had meetings here and there....most times i stayed in the office till 10pm.my wife started complaining,then i started contemplating resignation.

I would not have resigned the time i did;but my immediate boss who is a white South African, was having problems with his son who was a college student in SA: the son was always threatening that he would shoot himself cos his Dad was not always around;he eventually did! my boss had to relocate back to SA,he was a very close person; infact we had a business arrangement then.with my wife incessant complaints of not being arround coupled with my boss' sudden exit ihad to resign.

I waited for another 8 months before another job came.this time the job lesser than the one i used to have but as a family man now the stakes are higher,we were managing.after, i was promoted;i had to travel arround Nigeria- so the same vicious cycle started again:

for instance,last year i was in calabar between march and october during this period my wife was pregnant,when i got back,it was a few weeks to her EDD; so i took a 2 week off work to be with her but unfortunately i lost her during child birth due to some complications.

So when i woke up this morning ,rushing to the bathroom,forgetting today is sunday I ask myself would life have been different/interesting/more fun if i was just a taxi Driver or a palm wine tapper.my loss regardless.

Oh! I am sorry for ur loss but did u think u lost ur wife as a result of ur continued absence Bros, some people are damn looking for the type of opportunity u had without success.

I'm sorry for your loss.

But I think with education life is more interesting and fun.
It all depends on the kind of job their are some job that gives one enough time with one's family and their are others who dont.


Come to think of it,most people will never pray to be a taxi driver or palm wine tapper

The only purpose of education is not a profession or career. There is nothing wrong with education.
Our jobs, careers are very often a problem. I feel you there.
Sometimes we have to ask ourselves, do we really need a career / this PARTICULAR job?
Could we find a different one? Can we do with less money? Is quality tie with our families not more important?
These are questions everyone needs to answer for himself / herself.

Hmm, I feel your pain. Its never easy losing a lost one but you cant blame yourself. You are a man with a family so you had to work to take care of your family. Im sure wherever your wife is right now, she is looking down at you, happy that she married a good man.

I'm truly sorry and my sympathies bro.

You see I don't believe if your profession is a palm wine tapper or taxi driver , your situation now will be different,

What will be will be... it's your success and you earned it so please don't regret having a good job cos many people want to be in your shoes when it comes to career.

I wish you can talk to that serubawon guy so he can give you a word of wisdom , he was a widower and it sure wasn't easy for him too and you must be going thru s lot of regrets and what ifs.

It is well and The Lord is your strength .

People become slaves for their job not because they love it but because the job demands that it be so. So, they have to do it to take care of their families. Look on the brighter side. Some Taxi drivers are even more frustrated than you because when they see their mates riding the best cars and buying palacious houses they start regretting why they never went to school while some other taxi drivers and people who do menial jobs are happy because they're content with the littl they have. So, it all boils down ton you and your immediate needs.

I always believe the essence of employed work is to earn enough money and connections to be your own boss.
.
When u r too into ur job , trying to meet deadlines and impressing the board to be considered for promotion , it takes the drain out of ur life.
.
No matter the prospect , I don't plan working for more than 15 years for any person or group of persons.
.
#HOPETOTALISNOTREADINGTHIS

@OP
Your signature sums it up!

Accept my heartfelt sympathy for your loss, I know its not easy but the lord is your strength.
My dear brother, many people are praying daily to have the opportunity you have, don't think you lost her because you weren't always around, you might even be worse off as a taxi driver or palm wine tapper who knows? many of them are equally frustrated if not more.

Legit1: @OP
Your signature sums it up!

LMAO. His signature pretty contradicts his post

Legit1: @OP
Your signature sums it up!

.

Every morning I get up and look through the
Forbes list of the richest people in Nigeria. If I’m not there, I go to work.

Sorry bro, u don't get into Forbes list by working for people.
Refocus ur mind

sorry my bro 4 ur lost wife, u c there is notin wrong with being educated bt where d BIG problem is , is d reason behind going 2 shool. most nigerians especially our parents believe dat d reason we must go 2 skul is 2 acquire a certificate n get a good job, NO dat is very very wrong, we shld go 2 skul 2 get knowledge n information n apply it in our daily lives which will lead us in2 becoming an entrepreneur(our own boss), so pls make sure ur children do not do dsame mistake dat u made by working 4 other people n enslaving themselves bt u hv 2 educate them.

Rooneyboy: See them NL babes salivating over this widower ;using "condolence" as a shield.
A widower with so much prospects .

Nothing do u poster, u can just pick one NL babe on this thread to be ur mistress and I bet u she'll take good care of the home and the kids without any complaints @ all even if u are posted to kafanchan, so as long as u dey send money back monthly.

I'm very flattered !

uzodimma4sunnex: sorry my bro 4 ur lost wife, u c there is notin wrong with being educated bt where d BIG problem is , is d reason behind going 2 shool. most nigerians especially our parents believe dat d reason we must go 2 skul is 2 acquire a certificate n get a good job, NO dat is very very wrong, we shld go 2 skul 2 get knowledge n information n apply it in our daily lives which will lead us in2 becoming an entrepreneur(our own boss), so pls make sure ur children do not do dsame mistake dat u made by working 4 other people n enslaving themselves bt u hv 2 educate them.

What are you talking about sir?

Everybody should be an entrepreneur to be able to be in control of their own schedule in order to avoid death in a family?? Like seriously?? Jeez!!

ITbomb: I always believe the essence of employed work is to earn enough money and connections to be your own boss.
.
When u r too into ur job , trying to meet deadlines and impressing the board to be considered for promotion , it takes the drain out of ur life.
.
No matter the prospect , I don't plan working for more than 15 years for any person or group of person.
#HOPETOTALISNOTREADINGTHIS

you mean 15 years? Gosh! That's fucking too much! You mean u wan to be a slave for a hole 15 years..pls have a rethink ok.

this is one of the reasons this country is not moving forward if educated person (OP) calling taxi drivers illitrate! abi no bi training the taxi driver is using and likewise the palmmy tapper.

RIchibabe: you mean 15 years? Gosh! That's fucking too much! You mean u wan to be a slave for a hole 15 years..pls have a rethink ok.

Yea , I had planned for 7 before but I had to take it up so that I do a phased change over .
While working I will use the last 7 years to build up my business .

Awww, so sorry. I think life would have been so much simpler. Education brought the rat race, keeping up with the jones's and just so many other complex things. But it also has so many advantages, one important thing is that we are more enlightened. Most important is that we live longer. My dear, imagine, without education you would have been in your twilight years o. Life expectancy was about 40-45. So in all things, let us give thanks to God. I hope you heal from all what life has brought you. We all have out problems and challenges in this life. As a man, you chose a demanding job to provide for your family. It is normal and expected, and you shouldn't blame yourself for that. You didn't say if your baby survived. Life is for the living, so live it and enjoy it while it lasts. Maybe you should find a woman that is as mobile as you job wise or one that stays at home and you log them around. Business trips with the partner should be fun. It will cost you extra, but you and your family will experience life together while you do your job.

never remain in paid employment for too long. only do so till u get enough money to start ur own thing so u can have all the money u need and time to spend with ur family or do what ever u like. entrepreneurship is the only way to get on that forbes list u so desire. nobody on it is in paid employment, they are all BOSSES. sorry bout ur loss but i doubt it had anything to do with ur absence so dont blame urself too much.

My brother take heart.



Que Sera Sera:

When I was just a little girl
I asked my mother, what will I be
Will I be pretty, will I be rich
Here's what she said to me.

Que Sera, Sera,
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours, to see
Que Sera, Sera
What will be, will be.

When I was young, I fell in love
I asked my sweetheart what lies ahead
Will we have rainbows, day after day
Here's what my sweetheart said.

Que Sera, Sera,
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours, to see
Que Sera, Sera
What will be, will be.

Now I have children of my own
They ask their mother, what will I be
Will I be handsome, will I be rich
I tell them tenderly.

Que Sera, Sera,
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours, to see
Que Sera, Sera
What will be, will be.

Sowie 4 d loss bro... May God gif U d grace 2 move on,n beta tins await U...

Back 2 d post,if we dnt work we can't eat,daz d moto of an hussler in African.. We all want a beta job,zo as 2 meet up wif current standard of livin.. Most of d tins we studied in skool ® nt Wat we use in workin @ our various area of specialization,except 4 d medical experts n d engineers.

Education on d hand as lots of advantages alzo,cos daz d only criteria of gettin a beta job in our dearest country..

I think some peep got the op wrong. From what I could infer, I think, the op didn't mean he lost his wife because of his tight schedule rather never spent quality time with his wife due to his work schedule. Which boils down to his asking, if being a palm wine tapper or taxi driver would have afforded him, the "luxury" of spending quality time with the wife while she was alive?

calcal: this is one of the reasons this country is not moving forward if educated person (OP) calling taxi drivers illitrate! abi no bi training the taxi driver is using and likewise the palmmy tapper.

@ calcal,i never said taxi drivers and palm wine tapper are any less human and illiterates...FYI, my father was a transporter/truck driverand he was able to train 7 children.

woodcook: I think some peep got the op wrong. From what I could infer, I think, the op didn't mean he lost his wife because of his tight schedule rather never spent quality time with his wife due to his work schedule. Which boils down to his asking, if being a palm wine tapper or taxi driver would have afforded him, the "luxury" of spending quality time with the wife while she was alive?

@woodcook....God bless you,that's exactly what i meant!

I really register my condolence for the loss of your dear wife but that shouldn't be the end.Education is a vital tool most especially at this century of ours and thank God u have a good job to show for it cos u would have been a frustrated young man coupled with the loss of your wife as a taxi driver or palmwine tapper.You won' even be on nairaland takless of seeking formal advice if not educated!

I dnt think so

I DONT KNOW ABOUT LIFE BEING MORE INTERESTING BUT FROM MY INTERACTION WITH PEOPLE (ESPECIALLY ON THIS FORUM) I DO BELIEVE THAT EDUCATION WAS NOT MEANT FOR EVERYONE & SOME PEOPLE DEFINITELY MISSED THEIR CALLING IN LIFE BY GETTING A FORMAL EDUCATION.

Everything in life is a choice. The biggest problem we face in life as humans is not been able to define want we want. We always use circumstances to define our goals. The best question anyone can ask him/herself in life is, what's most important to me?...in answering this question, one can always find ways to achieve this most important goal. Your work or business should be your servant and not the other way round. A lot of business owners are in worse situation, so it's not about whether you own a business or you are an employee. Rather, it's all about specifically protecting our most important priority.

My father, successfully showed me this, when he's always around for us, his business never left his home, which means we always resumed at his office once we left school, and though there were tough times, his priority, which I believe was his family scaled through successfully.

For some other people, they might be able to get a 9am - 5pm job that pays say: 30-40% of what a wake up 4am - leave office 10pm job... this job might even be a walking distance from where they are... but they made a choice to go for the fatter pay...

Let it be clear, it shouldn't be easy starting out, but at a stage the choices and options will be there. And it's left for you. Life is so simple, but we make it complicated

@OP
I was thinking your topic was just the usual work-life balance situations we all have to deal with until I got to the part where you mentioned your wife's death. I am deeply sorry for that. Hope you get enough strength and courage to bear the loss.
The truth about life is that challenges comes to both literates and illiterates, rich and poor, males and females alike.
I think the most important prayer is that we be strong on the day of adversity.
Some people's wives have died right in their arms, some people have also had all their kids delivered safely while they are never around.
A friend of mine had to bury his wife who died of same complications after delivery of twins. He was very much around with the wife.
Believe me, if you were a poor taxi driver and had this same issue, you may tend to blame it on the fact that you couldn't afford a better quality health care.
Thank God for what you've got and look forward to the future.

Hey guys sorry am not responding to the post, i just joined nairaland and can comment now, after been a guest for 2 years, :-) Hey guys sorry am not responding to the post, i just joined nairaland and can comment now, after been a guest for 2 years, :-)