A Certain Professor drives into a petrol station in his sleek state of the art Range Rover Sports Utility Vehicle.
Professor: Ma guy, abeg, give me full tank.
Fuel Attendant: Sir, I don't speak pidgin, I only speak English
Professor: Ok! Good Morning. I currently feel a profound desire to replenish the propelling force of my motorized automobile. Therefore I cordially request you to transfer from your subterranean reservoir a sufficient quantity of the combustible fluid of the highest octane rating to fill the appropriate receptacle of the said means of perambulation to the brim.
Fuel Attendant: Errrrrrmmmm.... How much fuel you wan buy bros?

That's a nice one. That's the reward for pretence.