Men am very very happy today about this info. Strange things are happening around me

@p why did u go into prying into ur life? U are now in a dilemma. The DNA test is subject to error, as any human invention. I would rather u disregard the result and let ur dad remain ur dad. If not, u risk making both ur mum and dad ur enemies - ur dad for not being ur real dad, and mum for her waywardness culminating in conceiving a bastard. Would u now disown the man u hav always regarded as father? Islamic law is specific on this, in that a child's paternity is attributed to the husband if the wife remains married to him for more than six months prior to his birth - excellent.

@op life goes on o....stay strong

Please where in Lagos can I do this test?

Take heart damsel! Just get busy @least u r grown up. Move on wit life

This uncomfortable situation would have been avoided, and easily + cheaply uncovered if we stayed true to our ancestral traditions. With Ifa there is no hiding place. In this present but soon-to-be-destroyed global system where sexual immorality (including rape - e.g. if a wife/wife-to-be is raped but keeps quiet about it) is encouraged there would surely be illegitimate children in many homes.

kushbab: Some samples taken from me shows that my 'dad' is not my biological father so i need to know if the mouth swab is a reliable way of determining DNA. I need responses from matured minds please. Thanks.

Saliva is a good source of DNA. The test was correct unless they goofed up at the lab and switched the samples.

emiye: Roughly N150,000 in Nigeria.

wow!

emiye: Roughly N150,000 in Nigeria.

wow!

kushbab: Some samples taken from me shows that my 'dad' is not my biological father so i need to know if the mouth swab is a reliable way of determining DNA. I need responses from matured minds please. Thanks.

am å mother and ι̥ will advise u to go to ΰя̩̥̊ mother. The mind of å woman is like å migth oceans Ɣφΰ cnt image wat goes on in it. Every mother knws the true father of her child

Okija_juju: OP

Try taking samples from your childhood houseboy, Gateman, neighbour, The Pastor that prayed for your birth, etc..


Your mumsy don play away match be that!

Can't U̶̲̥̅̊ b serious 4 a moment?
U̶̲̥̅̊ think dis is smtin 2 joke with?
Grow up dude!

yea, you can use it for DNA testing. To get an accurate result, do not smoke or drink alcohol, or use any mouthwash with alcohol in it. Also, do not kiss or give a bj at least 24hrs before the swab samples are taken.

yes it is, also a piece of his hair, skin, but mouth swab is usually the easiest way. btw most nigerian men father children that are not theirs. If there was a show like maury in naija that exposes paternity, a lot of marriages would not last. usually n our cultures if a woman you are married to gives birth while married to you, that child no matter the paternity is yours. I dont know if you read a story about a family friend of mine i wrote a while ago about how he ended up finding out his parents neither mother nor father was his parents, he was a stolen child. I will tell you dont cause yourself any pain, sometimes ignorance is bliss. I know for my friend till today he is still trying to find his parents.

emiye: Roughly N150,000 in Nigeria.

ehhh!?are u tryin to say #150?...or #1500?...or.. Pikin oya,make we dey go,u b my son

sweety, just move on, is not your fault, move to your mum if she can cater for u, if she cant...try other means..... dont get distracted..... keep your head and life goes on, with or with out them...... should you have problems paying your school fees and all that, come to Nairaland i am sure some of us can help.

mu2sa2: @p why did u go into prying into ur life? U are now in a dilemma. The DNA test is subject to error, as any human invention. I would rather u disregard the result and let ur dad remain ur dad. If not, u risk making both ur mum and dad ur enemies - ur dad for not being ur real dad, and mum for her waywardness culminating in conceiving a bastard. Would u now disown the man u hav always regarded as father? Islamic law is specific on this, in that a child's paternity is attributed to the husband if the wife remains married to him for more than six months prior to his birth - excellent.

i'm nt prying we were all supposed to take a vacation to france so d embassy requested it.

Okija_juju: OP

Try taking samples from your childhood houseboy, Gateman, neighbour, The Pastor that prayed for your birth, etc..


Your mumsy don play away match be that!

if u dnt hv anything better to say pls keep off. FYI my mum was never married to my dad, jst boyfriend/girlfriend stuff.

oludayomi: am å mother and ι̥ will advise u to go to ΰя̩̥̊ mother. The mind of å woman is like å migth oceans Ɣφΰ cnt image wat goes on in it. Every mother knws the true father of her child

some mothers don't know if they had several sëxual partners within the same cycle!!!

razznaija: ehyah sorry o, I hope you are coping well with this new development.

nt at all nd he is not making it easy 4 me

I live in Canada, my family just went for DNA, the samples were taken from an identified office in Lagos, and i was asked to submit my samples here in Canada, they only took my mouth swap, later they sent the samples to a canadian recognized lab, and all was well. The DNA is in the saliva. It was 99.99999 corect

oludayomi: am å mother and ι̥ will advise u to go to ΰя̩̥̊ mother. The mind of å woman is like å migth oceans Ɣφΰ cnt image wat goes on in it. Every mother knws the true father of her child

Not true. My pregnant friend is unsure who her babys father is.

But yes.. take it to your mum and obviously there was a reason for the dna test to begin with?? ............ read more..... geez. Your mum has some explaining to do!

This is serious.

kushbab: Some samples taken from me shows that my 'dad' is not my biological father so i need to know if the mouth swab is a reliable way of determining DNA. I need responses from matured minds please. Thanks.

DNA fingerprint is easily done using fluids of the body. Other solid state samples are tissue, hair papilla etc. Saliva used for mouth swab is the fastest and cheapest means of obtain DNA but as a confirmatory test to eliminate all false positive results, DNA fingerprint is done using blood sample or s e x cell (gamete).

emiye: Roughly N150,000 in Nigeria.

Result are 99.9% accurate
$10 US $ for the kit
Lab charges $89.

you just discover this I wonder how u Will feel now about the person u thought eas ur dad...
Well mum knows best.

boy oh boy! This must be a shock.

@OP.... Sorry about the DNA of a thing... First you should understand that your "dad" will be pissed of for the first two weeks or so, but try and make him understand that sending you out like that is not the best way to get back at your mum, he is more or less punishing you for what you know nothing about. The fact still remains that he had something with your mum which is why he couldn't deny you from the inception.

Results are 99.9% accurate
$10.00 US$ for the kit
$99. Lab work.
Goodluck.

Hmmm na wa o.
If this can be happening in times past then what will happen in this generation BB girls.we don finish b dat

I must ensure I get every of my child tested b4 I start training another man pikin.

kushbab: the major thing bothering me nw is that he is angry and has told his relative to take me back formally to my mum's people and all the while i've been, he never allowed me visit my mum or her family members. Am very scared of hw am goin to cope considering that am in my final year.

Hi kushbab,
Sorry about your predicament, that is "life' for you, ...shyte happenz, as they say!

Like people have advised, the Swab test is between 97 - 99.7% accurate (l read that from a Medical website).
Doctors have mentioned that the problem, when the test go wrong, are usually associated with the "chain-of-handling" process i.e.:

*Samples could be contaminated along the line, samples could be swapped unknowingly, final results could also be swapped, e.t.c, all giving WRONG RESULTS!

What people normally do to rule out "any-eventuality" is to take a second confirmatory test, using a different Laboratory/service provider and a different type of sample (BLOOD this time, its just a small jab on your finger, like a normal test).
On that note, l will suggest you ask your Dad that you take a BLOOD DNA test and use a different provider....just to play safe.


Having said that, there is already "an issue" on ground ....that is your relationship with your "physical Dad".
Whether we like it or not, there is ALWAYS something that draws us to or makes us want to find out who our real Dad is ...even if we have no bond with him whatsoever!

You will ALWAYS want to know, even if its for curiosity's sake, who your Biological Father is.
That one is your Mum's palaver, if you need to know.

But currently, that Man (current Dad, funny it sounds that way?) is the person you had bonded with all your life.
You see him as your Dad and he sees you as his daughter.

Right now, he is very ANGRY, DISTURBED, DISAPPOINTED, CHEATED ...AND PROBABLY RUNNING CRAZY WITH VENGEANCE! ...and truly so!!
We must try and see things from the other person's perspective, as well.
Put yourself in his "shoes", how will you be feeling right now?
By doing this, you will be able to cope with his "wrong disposition" towards you at this moment.

Believe me, HE STILL LOVES YOU DEARLY BUT HIS EMOTIONS ARE IN A STATE OF CHAOS RIGHT NOW.

You need to give him "time and space" to calm down and overcome his inner turmoil. He will calm down eventually.
(Dont go running to your Mum's people right now, some of them might cause you more emotional damage, seeing it as an opportunity to get their own pound of flesh back, from you ...since you did not come to see them all this while when things were fine or just to get back at your Mum!)
If you have a friend, colleague or neighbor you can stay with, please do ...and keep this thing "quiet" for now, from people in your "immediate environment"...for now at least, till your emotions are back and solid)

If l could talk to him, this is part of what l would tell him (and this is where him having "experienced and matured friends" that you can involve, will play an important role. A 3rd party will easily talk more sense into him, at the initial stage, than you doing it yourself):

1) I would ask him if he thinks you asked him or any one, to "father" you?
2) I would ask him if you are the one responsible or played any part in your Mum giving you to him ...and not the person that truly inseminated her?
3) I will ask him if you have ever displayed any symptom of 'you not being his child before'?
4) I would ask him if he has ever loved you less than "his daughter" ...till the DNA revelation came out?
5) I would ask him if he thinks it is right to punish you for the sins of your Mother?
6) I would ask him if he valued the relationship both of you have shared all this while/ in the past?
7) I would ask him that "if the next test prove he is your father", if he can undo any damage he is doing now ... and if he would love you as he did before?

I would ask him MANY other questions that time and space wont allow me to state here ....and l would make sure he ANSWERS EVERY SINGLE QUESTION, record the "Q & A" cum "counseling session" and ask him to play it to himself at least ten times, in the next few days.
The idea is to make him "reflect deeply".

When l see him again, l will ask him to tell/convince himself that he is NOT your biological father but he should consider you as an orphan/fatherless ....and as "a gift and responsibility", by the almighty, to care-for and nurture, on HIS behalf.

I would remind him that since you have NO HAND in the event that transpired, he must not allow those "event" (which are mostly in the past), to affect the relationship between the two of you. If YOU dont want him is another matter.

I will ask him and remind him that "what if" you happen to be the only child he has, will he disown you on the basis of this DNA result or would he patch-up with you?

I believe, with God's help, l can convince him to take the "Upper Road, be matured about his pains" (and they are eternal pains, believe me) and maintain his relationship with you. God would intervene. Your case wont be the first ..and wont be the last!

The next stage would be to also counsel YOU:
I can imagine how you feel and how easy it is to tell you "concentrate on your exams"!
Where is the concentration going to come from?
How can you concentrate when the whole essence of your life has just been shattered? The "world" you know is crashing around you right now!

We will sit down and discuss and try to get you over how you feel right now (LOST, UNWANTED, BETRAYED, UNLOVED, DISAPPOINTED, e.t.c)


The thing is NONE OF YOU DESERVES ANY BLAME IN THIS FIASCO.
YOU ARE BOTH VICTIMS OF EITHER A DELIBERATE ACTION OR A "MISTAKE", BY YOUR MUM.


We will then arrange a "meeting of minds" and reconciliation between YOU and your Dad.
There and then you will rebuild your relationship with him and trust me, it will even be stronger than before.


But for now, you have to be strong and keep reminding yourself that you have no fault or "cause" in all these.
Dont let any guilt creep on you, you are blameless in the situation.

Also, dont begrudge your Mother about this. Time heals most, if not all wounds.


Lastpage!

If you need to talk privately, you can PM me and l will get back to you.
I will even be in Lagos next week... and if that is where you are, we can work-out something.
Cheer up, its not the end of the world ...and if it is, the "blameless" will go to heaven naah!

@Op, Just tell Ur Dad, without mincing words, to go & sought out d issue with Ur mum. Whn He is done, he can come and give U feedback.

Dis is distracting U in sch. Tell him dat if U fail because he cannot handle dis issue maturedly, He shld know dat He cannot set fire 2 his roof and go in 2sleep.

Besides, stay away frm d house now. Stay in sch and dont go home till U're thru wt Ur final yr. Be careful wt calls dat U will distract U. Only U can shape wat U will become, father or no father. It begins now!