...

Your story is much. I don't even know where to start from but I'll just pick one striking point and start from there -sex. I think the fault was all yours because you saw it coming but you didn't take action then. I wonder why you never scream then. So, why now? Know two things here when it comes to sex and women: they may deprive you sex because you have a low sex drive and hence cannot satisfy them. So instead of starting what you cannot end, it's better you don't start at all. Or the they may have a low sex drive and hence cannot withstand your much urge. So, who is the problem here? Again, you married her jobless, so why complaining of financing everything now? Again, don't complain spending for your own self please. You want to ask how? Well, the day both of you got married, you became one flesh. Now, if you spend, you spend for yourself and not just for her. So, please take it easy on her and try to apply some understandings.

why_me1944: I don't believe I was born as a man to come and help a woman live a fulfilling life while I live in depression. Life looks very empty to me.

Based on what you posted, I don't believe your wife is fulfilled either. She is likely just as miserable as you are. Good on you for providing 100% but perhaps having her take up a job may allow you afford to be able to spend more time together instead of you being away half the time. Also, you don't live in Nigeria, do you live in the west? There are myriads of marriage counselor's you can avail yourselves of their services. Find one and go there together to get to the origin of how things ended up the way they are.

why is she not working

I think before posting all these marital issues on NL,the spouses should talk first. Like someone here has suggested, I also think your wife is also miserable. from what you've said here, u seem like a good man, please do talk with your wife before thinking of a divorce.

OUCH! I feel you but have you told her any of the things you've written here or even all of it? That would be a good place to start, I once knew a fellow in a similar situation who threatened his wife with divorce that quickly wiped her into shape but he told me & a few friends he never meant to go through with it i.e the divorce

It was nice though (for him) to watch his wife arrange her parade and make their marriage work. The same tactic may or may not work for you but you need to rock the boat one way or the other to see what happens. You could slash her allowance, arrange a job or some sort of business for her when the baby is born and she can get back on her feet. You may have to force her into getting work, you know her better push the buttons you know will work on her.

And for those of you who are good at saying

1. Didn't you know she was like this before you married her?
2. You haven't told us the whole story ooo, there are always two sides to a story
3. Until I hear the wife's side of the story I can't comment blah blah blah....

PLS cut the poster some slack and let us all assume his story is genuine, give your advice on the basis of that and don't start with any of the 3 questions above abeg.

I want to believe that the wman will have reasons for her actions, why dont you ask her first why she's doing all that to hurt/torment you, perhaps, her responses will be d starting point for you to know where and how to address this issue.
All marriages have their ups and downs, but proper and effective communication can help to solve many of these problems. So, call her and communicate with her, just like when you pple are still courting. May God grant you d required wisdom to do this.
Wishing you goodluck.

Y complain here? Didn't u c all these b4 u married her?. Itz now 4 beta or worse, sort it out btwn urselves and make ur marriage work. I can't tell u to unmarry/divorce her and dnt bloody fink of having a mistress, it'll only make matters worse

This guy you need to talk to your wife about the things that bother you. You can talk to me cos I cant help you. Talk to her and explain how you feel in an honest sincere manner. Please dont yell @ her. Pregnancy does crazy things to a woman I can testify to that. Just take it easy and talk to her, let her understand. I'm sure the 2 of you want to be happy so you need to work on it. Marriage is a crazy thing that requires a lot of work. Goodluck

OP was looking for a virgin instead of a wife? you were intimate with your exes and dumped them.....NOW F#&*CK OFF, you deserve no sympathy.

You have to know being married is not easy

Talk to your wife, op about the way you feel, calmly and firmly.. Communication is the answer, not withdrawal.

That's why , it's good to test drive before getting married.. Cause some pple have high sexual drive, while some is average and some very low( it takes the grace and miracles of God to wake such type of pple up). A neighbour divorced his wife , just because she does not meet up , to his sexual drive and she will then report him to their pastor , who will return talk to him. After explaining to their Pastor, all the pastor will say , is he shouldn't lay much emphasis on his sexual urges, but try and be spiritual minded , so that he can cope with his wife . The third time, the wife reported him again, he simply told her.. It's over and and he has feelings too, that can't be ignored cos he is a worker in church. Do u know he left the church, left his wife and stays alone in another apartment, at another area.
But poster that does not mean , u should leave your wife.. Let both of you, open up about yourselves and how you both want the marriage to be.

@op,why did you modify your original post, dont you want advice any longer, seems you are not sincere with yur post here, or truth hurts.
Well, anyhow sha, open up a communication link with your wifey and stop making her feel like the devil.
May God help you.

You are spilling your heart to us but may be on your way to solving the problems if you boldly tell her as it is. Let her know how unsatisfactory your s*ex life is and other areas you find her wanting. You have me wondering whether there was courtship here at all or did you meet as strangers and get married.

All the same if she is pregnant you should be helping her with the chores and having to do your own laundry when she can't shouldn't be counted out for her. Do patiently accost the problems that you have okay.

greatgod2012: @op,why did you modify your original post, dont you want advice any longer, seems you are not sincere with yur post here, or truth hurts.
Well, anyhow sha, open up a communication link with your wifey and stop making her feel like the devil.
May God help you.

Thats what im saying

What happened to the story?