DEAR LADIES:I saw this somewhere and I think its useful:
COMMON MISTAKES WOMEN MAKE WHEN DISCOVERING AN AFFAIR:

When You Have just Discovered That Your Man Is Cheating On
You...Please DONT DO THE FOLLOWING:-

(1). DEMANDING TO KNOW ABOUT THE OTHER WOMAN:
The truth may hurt you. Can you handle the truth?

(2). INSULTING THE OTHER WOMAN:
You are giving her power, she doesn't deserve. Especially if you insult her to your husband e.g. how is your slut doing?

(3) .FORCING HIM TO CHOOSE, THINKING HE WILL CHOOSE YOU:
There is no competition here-you will lose this one! She is new & they are in the honeymoon phase, you on the other hand are an old habit.

(4). CALLING HIM EXCESSIVELY TO CHECK ON HIM LIKE A PRISONER:
He may start to avoid your calls even if he is not doing anything bad just to protect his freedom.

(5). BEATING THE OTHER WOMAN UP:
You are creating sympathy for her. Now she looks like your victim to him. With this one you are still giving her power.

(6). THREATENING TO LEAVE JUST TO SCARE HIM:
You are giving him ideas. You make the grass seem greener on the other side.

(7). CRYING:
He wont feel sympathy for you-he will feel burdened by the tears.

(. SNOOPING:
Dont hurt yourself unnecessarily. You will find what you are looking for. Dont break into his e-mails. Dont scroll his phone & dont go through his messages.

(9).BEING IN DENIAL EVEN THOUGH THE SIGNS ARE THERE:
Do something about your knowledge or you will make yourself sick. Some diseases are stress-related. Deal with your issues; dont bottle them up.

(10). TELLING HIS MOTHER:
For crying out loud! This is his mother!

(11) .COMMITTING SUICIDE: Seriously, Once you're gone, you're gone!

Put The Phone Down.
It Is Wise To Leave His Phone Alone. when you are hurting, deal with Your Disappointment Instead of Going through his phone only to find More Truths that will hurt you.

When His Phone rings, Leave The Room Even if its Ringing unattended To, Leave it Alone. Dont answer his phone. Learn To Be Strong And Ignore it.

I hope sisters are taking note. These tips work like magic...but they don't work for all men. These will work mostly if the lady knows where she stands with her man.

How to and how not to

braine: I hope sisters are taking note. These tips work like magic...but they don't work for all men. These will work mostly if the lady knows where she stands with her man.

Seconded

Another thread that encourages people to condone cheating. May be these tips work when it is boyfriend and girlfriend because you have not exchanged any vows and each party can still do whatever they like. But sorry to say, if it is husband and wife, some of these advice just don't

1. You need to know who the other woman is. It might be a friend, relative or anyone else. You need to know how many and the kind of women your husband sleep with so that you can assess your own safety in terms of STDs. Sorry you should know.

3/6. An unrepentant cheat should not be condoned. If your husband is blatantly cheating and has chosen to continue with some woman, you should ask him if he is still interested in the marriage. You can forgive a cheating husband if he is ready to stop, but if he continues, then may be he needs to chose who he really wants to be with so that the woman can also move on if need be.

10. Telling his mother might be necessary. May be he needs someone else to talk sense into him and his family should also know who their son really is, so that if the woman decides to leave, then they can know why

7. Crying is not for sympathy, it just hurts to find out your husband is cheating.

Finally, would this same rules apply to the man if the woman was cheating? I think we should start educating our woman to know they are not helpless slaves in marriage and men also need to understand the importance of being faithful. The topic just seems to encourage men to cheat because there is nothing their wives can do about it abi? If she cant do all of these, what should she do? Aplogise to the man?

Nashville: Another thread that encourages people to condone cheating. May be these tips work when it is boyfriend and girlfriend because you have not exchanged any vows and each party can still do whatever they like. But sorry to say, if it is husband and wife, some of these advice just don't

1. You need to know who the other woman is. It might be a friend, relative or anyone else. You need to know how many and the kind of women your husband sleep with so that you can assess your own safety in terms of STDs. Sorry you should know.

3/6. An unrepentant cheat should not be condoned. If your husband is blatantly cheating and has chosen to continue with some woman, you should ask him if he is still interested in the marriage. You can forgive a cheating husband if he is ready to stop, but if he continues, then may be he needs to chose who he really wants to be with so that the woman can also move on if need be.

10. Telling his mother might be necessary. May be he needs someone else to talk sense into him and his family should also know who their son really is, so that if the woman decides to leave, then they can know why

7. Crying is not for sympathy, it just hurts to find out your husband is cheating.

Finally, would this same rules apply to the man if the woman was cheating? I think we should start educating our woman to know they are not helpless slaves in marriage and men also need to understand the importance of being faithful. The topic just seems to encourage men to cheat because there is nothing their wives can do about it abi? If she cant do all of these, what should she do? Aplogise to the man?

Nashville don't you read the Nigerian Bible?

Infact, I think the mods should start banning handles which post topics that don't add meaning to the society.

This ur post does not make sense. so when all these happen, what should the woman do? endure till she die? this kind of write-up does not enlighten women at all. i just waste my MB opening this thrend.

Smh... Don't I just feel sad

No need giving the woman relevance, but if your husband is cheating I think you need to know. Playing dumb, deaf or hide and seek may harm you more. You expose yourself to deadly diseases and sometimes to a psychopath. I think people should give ultimatum's when you are truly done. If you still want the marriage and you give ultimatum, hmmm. We all know what we can handle, so if you can't handle a cheat, don't marry one or tell him its ok before marriage. And you die of hypertension during the marriage.

bukatyne:

Nashville don't you read the Nigerian Bible?

Nigerian bible? Pls where can I get it.maybe it will help me to grasps what d poster wrote a bit. Hv read and re-read it,it doesn't add. Maybe that's me anyway

@op sorry to say,but this ur post is senseless

I feel sorry for women with this mentality,Living in bondage redefined.Nashville spoke my mind,its a shame a man knows what women should know but which they refused to learn.

easier said than done..... minding my bizzness! >:

you've just told us to do nothing which in my opinion is not possible if you love your man.

Fellow women will never listen. A cheating husband is just engaging in physical exercise with his girlfriend. Most of those relationships are just to satisfy sexual urge in the immediate, and they may most often not love the ladies in question. A gud wife will position herself to be a good soul mate and companion which he can't do without. The man will always come back if you are his true friend. Just leave him alone. Women should develop strong mind and stop monitoring their husbands.

It is absolutely wrong for a man to cheat on his wife n (vice versa) for GODS sake. Any woman dat can look the other way, i hail. But it only shows she doesnt love that man. As far as am concern. If she leaves her husband alone , is it u she will come n hold?
U people dat say give him space i wonder. If i wanted space i wudnt have gotten married to him in d first place for crying out loud haba. TOTAL Denial....