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Wife Version 1.0 - Programming - Nairaland

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Wife Version 1.0 by jimblaze(m): 10:26pm On May 16, 2008
THIS IS WHAT A GUY WROTE TO A SYSTEM ANALYST;
Dear Systems Department,
I am desperate for some help! I recently upgraded my program from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that the new program began unexpected child processing and also took up a lot
of space and valuable resources.

This wasn't mentioned in the product brochure. In addition Wife 1.0 Installs itself into all other programs and launches during systems Initialization and then it monitors all other system activities.

Applications such as "Boys' Night out 2.5" and "Golf 5.3" no longer Run, and crashes the system whenever selected.

Attempting to operate Selected "Saturday Rugby 6.3" always fails and "Saturday Shopping 7.1" runs instead.

I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background whilst attempting to run any of my favourite applications. Be it online or offline.

I am thinking of going back to "Girlfriend7. 0", but uninstall doesn't work on this program.

Can you please help?

, AND THIS WHAT THE ANALYST SAID;

Dear Customer,
This is a very common problem resulting from a basic misunderstanding of the functions of the "wife1.0 "program.

Many customers upgrade from "Girlfriend 7.0" to “Wife 1.0” , thinking that "Wife 1.0" is merely a UTILITY AND ENTERTAINMENT PROGRAM.

Actually, "Wife 1.0" is an OPERATING SYSTEM designed by it's Creator to Run everything. You are unlikely to be able to purge "Wife 1.0 "and still convert back to "Girlfriend 7.0 ", as "Wife 1.0 " was not designed to do this and it is Impossible to uninstall, delete or purge the program files from the System once it is installed.

Some people have tried to install "Girlfriend 8.0 "or "Wife 2.0 " but have ended up with even more problems. (See manual under Alimony/Child Support and Solicitors' Fees).
Having " Wife 1.0 " installed, I recommend you keep it installed And deal with the difficulties as best as you can. When any faults or problems Occur, whatever you think has caused them, you must run the C:\APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME Program and avoid attempting to use the *Esc-Key for it will freeze the entire system. It may be necessary to run C:\APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME for a number of times, and eventually hope that the operating system will return to normal.

"Wife 1.0 ", although a very high maintenance
program, can be very rewarding. To get the most out of it, consider buying additional
Software such as "Flowers 2.0" and "Chocolates 5.0" or "HUGS\KISSES 600.0" or TENDERNESS \UNDERSTANDING 1000.0", or even "Eating Out Without the Kids 7.2.1" if child processing has already started). DO NOT under any circumstances install "Secretary
2.1"(Short Skirt Version) or "One Nightstand 3.2" (Any Mood Version), as this is not a supported Application for "Wife 1.0 "and the system will almost certainly CRASH.

Thanks

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Wife Version 1.0 by jimblaze(m): 10:29pm On May 16, 2008
credit to cybertron12k for this post
Re: Wife Version 1.0 by Emma4dfuture(m): 11:17pm On May 16, 2008
Men that was nice,that was gongo aso.Keepit up.
Re: Wife Version 1.0 by Hardballer(m): 10:06am On May 22, 2008
lol
Re: Wife Version 1.0 by javalove(m): 4:37pm On May 22, 2008
that was funny, actually i have not purchased the wife 1.0 program cos its a bit expensive. After the purchase, remember u need to get some updates and the price varies depending on which tribe u are. As a yoruba boy, purchasing Wife 1.0 would mean breaking the bank as the price goes higher and higher by the day.

But girlfriend 1.0 is easier to maintain infact i am currently using the 7th version, GirlFriend 7.0 and she has always proven to be better than the previous versions. I am not always looking to upgrade to Wife 1.0 now but would do that much later. Right now, GiirlFriend 7.0 gives me all i want. She runs without errors, and even if she does, it costs just a few thousands to fix. I am enjoying life with girlfriend 7.0 and version 8.0 is in the pipeline. I heared it would be released any moment from now and uninstalling my previous version wud be a bit difficult but its a must,

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