For those of us that were born in homes where eyes are used for 50% of the communication to kids, I have been imagining what my mom's non-verbal eye signal will be should I be found playing at the gate of the house of senator Ahmed Yerima, the pro-child marriage emissary. Woe betide that girl that day that didn't understand my mom's nod, eye widening, false verbal acceptance before strangers, neck wiping, eye itching, long winking or that very subtle "we shall see at home” smile. Woe betide that daughter who is not in front of her Social studies notebook with a close-of-day, blow-by-blow account of what she has read. Some thanks to African Culture.

Before now, I used to think Nigeria had many multifaceted challenges where electricity issues should be more important than erection and education should prevail over ejaculation. I used to think the administrative capacity of Senator Yerima will be most needed been a former state governor. But unfortunately when I heard the pro-child marriage arguments from a man who some Nigerian kids won't mind making a role model, I was sorry. I wonder how people attain leadership positions in Nigeria and almost concluded that a sick leadership is the reward of well watered illiteracy and poverty. Everything in life climaxes with a consequence.

While it will be wrong to stop Senator Yerima from excercising his fundamental human right of freedom of religion, I begin to question what cultural bondage, religious nuances and prevailing circumstances that seeks and dictatorially desires to hijack the extraordinary expressions of a human mind or compel it to submit(this time not to bombs but to a "horseband" or die.The human mind is like a garden. You plant the right seeds with adequate watering, tendering in a girl-child's mind and you produce a solution driven mind, a great wife, an intellectual, a loving mother, a leading mentor and a role model. There is a genius and grace lying in everywoman. And this garden is better harnessed with education, good parenting, consentual marriage , the right husband, funding, diet, health, love and a non-selfish service to God.

I was one of those shy pretty girls that left boarding school in SS2 for the long holidays. I had started menstruating some nine months earlier but I added close to one feet in less than a month and so did my bosom grow big during the holidays. I worriedly kept touching my butts which suddenly bloated overnight! As soon as I resumed in school in SS3 ,I became the talk. 14 guys made advances in first week SS3! And I enjoyed some distraction or sorry attention, crushes, flattery and overpampering that never stood the test of time. And generally men don’t allow you grow anymore as long as your body has grown. I remained a child but had a big babes body! Looking back now, I can't imagine myself getting married then. Thank God for disciplined parents. It could have only been a disaster.

Comparing teenage romantic inflammation and consentual marriage, I insist there may be questions and logic which our dear senator must get right and answer. First who should be responsible for the consequences and decisions of marriage?If placing a motorcycle engine in an SUV won't make it an SUV, does wearing an adult's body or dress make a child an adult? Is child marriage not the real cause of high rates of Vesico-vaginal Fistula disease in Nigeria ?What are the consequences when both mother and child are still in need of parenting?What does early parenting do to a 13 year old mother? How many of the 13 years old girls he married has made it through university education? How many Female professors and female Problem solvers have we produced that got married at 13 years old? Is a man that has sexual feelings for a 13 years old not due for mental examination?

If paedophiles can get a law to protect them after abusing half-conscious kids, pro-incest cases may be won also in court one day. Many of these girl-wives still end up falling genuinely in love with another man after the age of consent but they already found themselves in a helpless situation with a dictator that rapes instead of making love and help produce several kids that have no sense of belonging. Yerima should always remember that there are 160million people in this country whose reasoning is not in default settings.

The responsibilities of marriage is enormous and should not be for kids. Babies should not give birth to babies. The maturity, wisdom, diligence needed to raise a child that will be a star is not available in girl-kidswho are trying to escape youthful exuberance and juvenile deliquency. When a girl calls you father, be a good one. No wonder most ordinary people that experiment Yerima’s argument end up in count-losing polygamy, divorce, poverty, illiteracy to produce almajiris, area boys etc. Fiveyears after that marriage, She only ends up becoming the sixthwife at 25 years old. They are also sometimes the factory for Nigeria’s population explosion that makes “womb-child” count ahead of brain child. A child well trained and nurtured is a problem solving arrow for the world. And vice versa!

If Yerima likes, let him give out all his daughters at 6years old.Nigeria will not legislate child marriage. He is simply shallow in thinking and cannot see the realities of events happening to the life of a girl child in a changing world. However, parents should grow above dowries, bride price, cultural bondage, covenants, religious nuances and take the right decisions in the interest of their kids. We hope the Nigerian legislative house will take right decisions and keep paedophiles and rapists where they belong.

Tunde Wale Adegbite
Ourwale@gmail.com

Boring!

Op thanks...Quite interesting

icon8: Boring!

senator , how tins na...U lyk am o , u nor lyk am o , d idea of u marrying babies wont work .Yeye craddle robber

petrov 10: senator , how tins na...U lyk am o , u nor lyk am o , d idea of u marrying babies wont work .Yeye craddle robber

This story too long for me to understand, good nigerian should pls summarize it for me.