Husbands, why dont you workout with your wives? Why do you allow them look fat and shapeless after just one baby? Women why do you let yourselves go just because you had babies? Most women say they dont have time to excercise and lose the weight, if you really cant find the time to take care of yourself and look good, what do you have time for? Lets hear everyone's views

I don't think they deliberately want to look fat or shapeless. They need a lot of support from we the husbands. Its not easy for them. Personally I do a lot to encourage my wife.

The stress they go through on daily basis is something else. Most women don't even know that they are getting out of shape. Its d responsibility of the husband to point it out with love and care and suggest a workable solution. There is no need to start comparison class with those single ladies who are in their early twenties. All they need is love and encouragement to keep fit. I buy my wife what I love to see on her.

I teLl my wife she looks like 200naira agege bread anytime she adds extra fat, then she hits d gym and I'm left with just fatty a$$...my fav!

I will always encourage my future wife to do exercise and look good after child-birth.

My sister that I know that is lepa(thin) before, after she gave birth she's now getting fat and I use tell her to burn those fat.

Even me that is unmarried realised i was almost loosin my shape.my friends keep saying shewa see your tummy,the truth of the matter is that i stopped going to the gym because there is no time.monday to friday is soooo loaded with work.saturdays and sundays are the only time i rest and even after closing from work on week days,i have to settle down to cook and its late at night.so about 3 weeks ago,i went to see my doctor and he said shewa let me even check your weight,stand on this stuff.so i weighed xyz.after he did the calculation with my height,he said babes,you are getting over weight.you have to loose 6kg.you were never like this before,you were so conscious of yourself,what happened




ok tell me about your diet,what you eat and when you eat.i told him at work i eat junks.i take a can of malt almost on a daily basis because its in the fridge with spring rolls.i didnt see fruits and where they are selling it is far.


Anyway i resumed back to the gym on weekends and because i stopped gyming,i started feeling pains,good enough i have lost some kgs.so the point is




no matter how busy you are,you have to create time for YOUR BODY.nobody will take care of your body LIKE YOU.all the flabby arms,flabby tummy,huge thighs with massive stretch marks shouldnt even be there in the first place if you curbed it on time.


If you give birth and after some weeks,you start exercising,doing sit ups,eating less,taking more fruits and when you have the urge to take coke,fanta,malt and all these carbonated drinks,buy oranges or pineapple,blend it and keep in the fridge.DONT PUT SUGAR INSIDE O less oil swimming inside soups and beans,less meats.if you take 3 reduce it to one,no suya,ice cream,replace all that with fruits and if you must take them,do that very minimally and rarely.


Instead of taking bus,whenever the opportunity comes,trek more.



That way you get to have the body you want.whether or not you have kids.dont leave your body unattended to,whatever you dont take care of/maintain starts to degenerate and in the course of your hustling and bustling,one day you look at the mirror naked and wonder where all your shape has gone too.



People see me now and be like,see shape,see shewa's body.no one understand all the meat pie, puff puff, hot dog and mende mende i have to remove my eyes away from.no one sees me when i go to the gym to work out

Every day before i go out,i do like 10 sit ups every day,skip like 5o times and do press up and drink 2 glasses of water before taking maybe 1 toast bread and am out.all this things come with discipline.whether you have giving birth or not.



My friends hairdresser is as big as eniola badmus ( that yoruba actress) and she loads her fridge with half a crate of carbonated drinks,choclate,sweets etc.the painful part is that she will be giving her 8 months baby cold coke.that one now doesnt want to drink water again after eating.its coke and of course the baby is fat.


I told her,you know your husband is working in a university campus and he is exposed to many girls,yet you keep eating any how,leaving every part of your body to sag,see folds and flabs on your body.see your tummy falling towards your private part.continue. Let your husby jam one smallee.you will soon go and spend your money on doctors

chaircover: edited brb

I see you CC,

kulyie: Every day before i go out,i do like 10 sit ups every day,skip like 5o times and do press up and drink 2 glasses of water before taking maybe 1 toast bread and am out.all this things come with discipline.whether you have giving birth or not.



My friends hairdresser is as big as eniola badmus ( that yoruba actress) and she loads her fridge with half a crate of carbonated drinks,choclate,sweets etc.the painful part is that she will be giving her 8 months baby cold coke.that one now doesnt want to drink water again after eating.its coke and of course the baby is fat.


I told her,you know your husband is working in a university campus and he is exposed to many girls,yet you keep eating any how,leaving every part of your body to sag,see folds and flabs on your body.see your tummy falling towards your private part.continue. Let your husby jam one smallee.you will soon go and spend your money on doctors

You make me laugh with your 10sit up and 50 skip.

I usually do 100 sit-up, 500 skip with other moves and I'm considering on increasing it, now it's a challenge for you to increase yours....I dare you!

As per topic, it's not easy esp with kids, you never know until you put yourself in the shoes.
But if you really want, start walking a lot when you are pregnant, like that you won't feel so weak after childbirth to continue.

Watch what you eat, the hormones making you eat too much, try and eat in portion control, make sure you don't have too much food in the house ( some ppl actually don't like wasting food, they rather put It in their mouth/ stomach instead of wasting) and walk around more.
After childbirth, still watch what you eat, I didn't do much exercise the Initial time but I selected what I eat.
Plenty veges, fruits, very little rice and pasta. I could count the no of times I ate garri. I only lick the soup. Drink a lot of water before eating to fill up space in my stomach.

Breastfeeding also makes one add a lot of weight if you don't know the technique involved. It makes you hungry and tend to eat more than the baby had taken from you.

Anyway, strict diet and exercising is the key!

Chillisauce:

I see you CC,



You make me laugh with your 10sit up and 50 skip.

I usually do 100 sit-up, 500 skip with other moves and I'm considering on increasing it, now it's a challenge for you to increase yours....I dare you!

As per topic, it's not easy esp with kids, you never know until you put yourself in the shoes.
But if you really want, start walking a lot when you are pregnant, like that you won't feel so weak after childbirth to continue.

Watch what you eat, the hormones making you eat too much, try and eat in portion control, make sure you don't have too much food in the house ( some ppl actually don't like wasting food, they rather put It in their mouth/ stomach instead of wasting) and walk around more.
After childbirth, still watch what you eat, I didn't do much exercise the Initial time but I selected what I eat.
Plenty veges, fruits, very little rice and pasta. I could count the no of times I ate garri. I only lick the soup. Drink a lot of water before eating to fill up space in my stomach.

Breastfeeding also makes one add a lot of weight if you don't know the technique involved. It makes you hungry and tend to eat more than the baby had taken from you.

Anyway, strict diet and exercising is the key!

lol,that sit ups and skipping is to save time,on weekends i do more than that.meanwhile if a nursing mom doesnt have time,weekend is there for her


meanwhile,i dont use lifts except on rare occasions when i am in a hurry.i use the stirs

If u r the type that hv been exercising b4 marriage, chances r u will continue after childbirth. A 10 minutes exercise can do wonders.
Most of us don't eat healthy foods. I become lepa when pregy bc of lack of food and frequent throwing up but will double in size after giving birth. Once I'm fit by my own standards, I will start doing those indoor things I normaly do and they pay off. I can exercise in my kitchen, bathroom, sitting and watching tv. Even dancing! Anything that will make ur heart pound is good to go!

If not for keeping fit, at least for health benefits.

Also, men instead of whinning, exercise with ur spouse. Its another way to catch fun and that motivates most ladies.
Also, help her in taking care of the family so she can hv small time for herself. Very necessary.
Don't forget that some contraceptives makes some ladies fat.(Another topic entirely)
Whether u r naturally on d big side or lekpa side, just keep fit and look it.

How u look tells a lot about u!

Nursing mum esp during the first months hardly have time to get up from her bed because of lack of sleep . I didn't do any exercise when nursing during the first three months oh, but I usually eat right. No sweet drinks, Lipton tea without milk before going to bed, with little milk and sugar for breakfast, more veges etc.

After three months, I resumed work and formula feeding started, partner was there to help too. Bought breastpump, wey the time sef to pump am?

Increase your sit up now, it takes less than 15 min for the skip and sit up. Like that your body will be in great shape before you start family. Once you start, you need extra motivation to keep It going. Trust me, EXTRA!
You say, let me leave it when the kids are bigger, na lie! Na dia worse. This one is shouting for this, that one is pulling your shirt. You never jam

Post PARTUM DEPRESSION IS REAL!
Is is not easy. . . .

Kanwulia: Post PARTUM DEPRESSION IS REAL!
Is is not easy. . . .

they can always work out after the depression. Some just dont bother.

Thanks to all posters. This is a very educative thread. I checked my weight yesterday and discovered that I have gained 8kg, a whole 8kg. God help your pikin.

No Qualms: Thanks to all posters. This is a very educative thread. I checked my weight yesterday and discovered that I have gained 8kg, a whole 8kg. God help your pikin.

amen o!

Poster

May I ask if you have kids of your own, even if it's just one? The truth is if you don't you won't understand that indeed there is hardly time for personal care of that nature (i.e work outs). Children practically take over your life especially the new born babies, you constantly suffer sleep deprivation and when your body isn't well rested believe me it won't respond well to exercise.

Sleep deprivation is just one aspect, it is also EXTREMELY difficult to focus on weight loss when you have stressful situations in your life as well. Women especially in this part of the world (Africa) experience really tough challenges that we men cannot even begin to fathom, she's expected to play the role of wife, mother, housekeeper, income earner to support her family whilst her needs, desires and interests practically takes the back seat in her life, she is most times overwhelmed with her numerous responsibilities and the weight just creeps up on her.

sihom: Poster

May I ask if you have kids of your own, even if it's just one? The truth is if you don't you won't understand that indeed there is hardly time for personal care of that nature (i.e work outs). Children practically take over your life especially the new born babies, you constantly suffer sleep deprivation and when your body isn't well rested believe me it won't respond well to exercise.

Sleep deprivation is just one aspect, it is also EXTREMELY difficult to focus on weight loss when you have stressful situations in your life as well. Women especially in this part of the world (Africa) experience really tough challenges that we men cannot even begin to fathom, she's expected to play the role of wife, mother, housekeeper, income earner to support her family whilst her needs, desires and interests practically takes the back seat in her life, she is most times overwhelmed with her numerous responsibilities and the weight just creeps up on her.

The best post by a mile and you hit the nail squarely on its head!

The key word here is overwhelmed. These women don't deliberately let themselves go. Who would want to lose her shape, gain excess weight and be a candidate for high bp, high cholesterol or even heart failure? No, they've just got so much on their plate, taking time out to look after themselves is a task in itself.

Rather than stigmatize these women (which usually backfires and they go down the comfort eating route), they should be encouraged to adopt healthy lifestyles.

Take dieting for example. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day and should never be skipped. Thus following the saying: eat like a king for breakfast, then eat like a queen for lunch and then like a pauper for supper - reason being that your body's metabolism is highest in the morning / start of the day and lowest in the evening / end of the day.

Fact of the matter is this: You are what you eat.

sihom: Poster

May I ask if you have kids of your own, even if it's just one? The truth is if you don't you won't understand that indeed there is hardly time for personal care of that nature (i.e work outs). Children practically take over your life especially the new born babies, you constantly suffer sleep deprivation and when your body isn't well rested believe me it won't respond well to exercise.

Sleep deprivation is just one aspect, it is also EXTREMELY difficult to focus on weight loss when you have stressful situations in your life as well. Women especially in this part of the world (Africa) experience really tough challenges that we men cannot even begin to fathom, she's expected to play the role of wife, mother, housekeeper, income earner to support her family whilst her needs, desires and interests practically takes the back seat in her life, she is most times overwhelmed with her numerous responsibilities and the weight just creeps up on her.

Thanks for your support of women BUT does she not owe it to herself to get back in shape. The excuses you gave for her are the expectations of others. "She is expected to play the role of wife, mother, housekeeper, income earner to support her family whilst her needs, desires and interests practically takes the back seat in her life". She should make it a priority to get out to the gym three times a week. Sure it might take 30 minutes to drive there and another 30 back but that is just what she needs to do. She can also work out at home. Take the baby and hand the baby to daddy then go work out. The biggest issue here is women probably thinking that people will look at them as lazy and not serious if they leave the home for 2 hours plus just to focus on themselves. Another big part of getting fat is what we eat. Most times it is the woman that decides what everyone eats in the home. Stop frying ever doggone thing. Let the whole family including husband get with the program. On the weekends you guys can eat the fried stuff and on weekdays keep the food healthy which is easy to do in Nigeria anyway. No sweets. No cookies. No juice. Not good for you or the kids. You might never return back to the size 4 you were before the babies but there is hardly any excuse to carry a size 16 body around. Please women teach other people how to treat you by treating yourself like you are valuable.

Efemena

Help me tell her, but my problem with these kinds of threads or rather you WOMEN in particular is that you are always the ones to cast the first stone at your fellow women and I just don't get it. You women seem oblivious of the challenges that exist for your gender.

A woman will be the first one to say something nasty like Shewa is 30+ single and frustrated, Look at you 4 years in marriage and you don't have children, my children are finer than yours and the list goes on and then now we have this weight issue thread asking why women let themselves go.

Why not ask us men why we let ourselves go? That question would be more befitting for my gender because we are not overly tasked or saddled with the responsibilities you women are. WHEN WILL ALL OF YOU (YES YOU WOMEN I'M TALKING TO YOU) LEARN THE BOND OF SISTERHOOD AND STICK TOGETHER AND STICK UP FOR EACH OTHER?

Soul glo

Believe me I wasn't trying to make excuses for women my objective was to point out the fact that women generally have a mountain load of responsibilities to handle and in the course of juggling these responsibilities they unintentionally and unconsciously neglect themselves not just physically but mentally and in some cases spiritually as well WHILE putting other peoples needs ahead of theirs.

I've had to babysit and take care of my 2 two year old nephew in the absence of his parents they were absent for good reasons but I won't go into that. I am very conscious about health and fitness but in a period of one month I packed on weight like crazy, mind you my job wasn't just to babysit I was doing practically everything a house wife does from cooking to cleaning the house etc

That whole business of raising a family even one kid is hard work and I simply bow & tremble for all the women who hold it down so well and don't lose their minds in the process. So I'm vexed when these women start threads like these is the aim to bash your fellow woman who has lost it and flatter yourself because you haven't?

At the risk of sounding like a man with a grudge and problem I rest my case.

But come oooh, soul glo how many men do you know whom stick around to watch their own children and let wifey take a break or work out? Most of the married ones I know are irritable and really don't want to be bothered, and even when they assume responsibility for five minutes they feel flustered and begin to look for Mama Nkechi to come and take her child.

sihom: Efemena

Help me tell her, but my problem with these kinds of threads or rather you WOMEN in particular is that you are always the ones to cast the first stone at your fellow women and I just don't get it. You women seem oblivious of the challenges that arise for your gender.

A woman will be the first one to say something nasty like Shewa is 30+ single and frustrated, Look at you 4 years in marriage and you don't have children, my children are finer than yours and the list goes on and then now we have this weight issue thread asking why women let themselves go.

Why not ask us men why we let ourselves go? That question would be more befitting for my gender because we are not overly tasked or saddled with the responsibilities you women are. WHEN WILL ALL OF YOU (YES YOU WOMEN I'M TALKING TO YOU) LEARN THE BOND OF SISTERHOOD AND STICK TOGETHER AND STICK UP FOR EACH OTHER?

Pls don't generalise and stigmatise all women with the same brush.

I've never come across the class of women you've just described - must be the sort of women you roll with, and if that's the case, then I'll advise you to change friends. Get realistic people on board.

Anyway, it's easy for anyone to point the finger be it male or female. The fact is, for most Nigerian women battling with weight issues after the birth of their child(ren), the husbands play a big role in the women letting themselves go. Now what do I mean?

Take diet for example. Your average Naija brother expects to eat proper eba / pounded yam/ amala / fufu with smoking hot Egusi / Ogbolo / Banga soup with an assortment of cow legs, chicken drum sticks, stock fish, fresh fish, etc to the point where they wipe their sweaty brows with one hand while reaching for the glass of chilled bear with the other hand, then belch and find it difficult to get up. How can a sister cook such an appetizing meal for hubby then turn her back on it and settle for 'rabbit food' (i.e lettuce, salads, etc)?

If hubby really wants his wife to get back in shape, he too should be prepared to let go of those high in carbohydrates and fatty-oil-based foods and soups. It's no use him eating traditional meals while wifey has to stick to leaner foods. It won't work simply because the temptation will be too much for her to handle.

Efe

No be fight now, I was only speaking the truth not necessarily generalising or trying to stigmatize your gender.
Even here on NL I see the way you women go at each other with such nastiness, it gets even worse in the real world.
I've seen that attitude at my work place, with my own relations as well.

sihom: Efe

No be fight now, I was only speaking the truth not necessarily generalising or trying to stigmatize your gender.
Even here on NL I see the way you women go at each other with such nastiness, it gets even worse in the real world.
I've seen that attitude at my work place, with my own relations as well.

All the more reason for you to change the sort of females you mix with, seeing as they reek of negativity.

Efemena_xy:


Anyway, it's easy for anyone to point the finger be it male or female. The fact is, for most Nigerian women battling with weight issues after the birth of their child(ren), the husbands play a big role in the women letting themselves go. Now what do I mean?

Take diet for example. Your average Naija brother expects to eat proper eba / pounded yam/ amala / fufu with smoking hot Egusi / Ogbolo / Banga soup with an assortment of cow legs, chicken drum sticks, stock fish, fresh fish, etc to the point where they wipe their sweaty brows with one hand while reaching for the glass of chilled bear with the other hand, then belch and find it difficult to get up. How can a sister cook such an appetizing meal for hubby then turn her back on it and settle for 'rabbit food' (i.e lettuce, salads, etc)?

If hubby really wants his wife to get back in shape, he too should be prepared to let go of those high in carbohydrates and fatty-oil-based foods and soups. It's no use him eating traditional meals while wifey has to stick to leaner foods. It won't work simply because the temptation will be too much for her to handle.

sihom: Soul glo

Believe me I wasn't trying to make excuses for women my objective was to point out the fact that women generally have a mountain load of responsibilities to handle and in the course of juggling these responsibilities they unintentionally and unconsciously neglect themselves not just physically but mentally and in some cases spiritually as well WHILE putting other peoples needs ahead of theirs.

I've had to babysit and take care of my 2 two year old nephew in the absence of his parents they were absent for good reasons but I won't go into that. I am very conscious about health and fitness but in a period of one month I packed on weight like crazy, mind you my job wasn't just to babysit I was doing practically everything a house wife does from cooking to cleaning the house etc

That whole business of raising a family even one kid is hard work and I simply bow & tremble for all the women who hold it down so well and don't lose their minds in the process. So I'm vexed when these women start threads like these is the aim to bash your fellow woman who has lost it and flatter yourself because you haven't?

At the risk of sounding like a man with a grudge and problem I rest my case.

But come oooh, soul glo how many men do you know whom stick around to watch their own children and let wifey take a break or work out? Most of the married ones I know are irritable and really don't want to be bothered, and even when they assume responsibility for five minutes they feel flustered and begin to look for Mama Nkechi to come and take her child.

I quoted both your posts because it basically answers the question. It is a matter of choices and prioritizing. You can leave the baby three nights a week with the husband to hit the gym. He will not die if he watches the baby. Your roof will not cave in if you do not vacuum everyday. Your in laws might wonder why they look in your fridge and do not see assorted fried meats but you will only have baked chicken there because you have decided to make the health of you and your immediate family the priority rather than how you will look to people. Your pastors wife might wonder why you do not come fore bible study on Monday, Women's fellowship on Tuesday, evangelism of Thursday but yet you have time for the gym but that is her problem. How many Nigerian women or women in general actually can be successful at doing these things without feeling guilty. This is why I like men and their often simplistic way of approaching things. I am a strong supporter of everything WOMAN but we need to learn from men to take it easy sometimes. Tell a man to dress a child for church and then tell mommy to dress that same child. The way he will do it will be so irritating to you but at the end of the day that child will be dressed for church. Sure one sock might be longer than the other but they are both white and the husband's blood pressure stays at 120/80. Tell a woman to do the same thing. She will first insult herself for not realizing that she laid out two different socks then she will change the whole outfit because the socks were different. Meanwhile husband is now in the car honking the horn waiting for her. At the end of the whole thing her blood pressure will be 150/138 over dressing the baby and husband is looking calm as can be. He will not even realize that the baby's clothes have completely changed. What we are encouraging women to do is to direct some of the energy they put into those things that are not so important to things that are important. Losing the weight is not just about looking good. It is more about being healthy.

In direct response to your question about how many men will agree to look after the baby. really? He will get used to it. When he starts lookign around for "Mama Nkechi" he will realize that she is half an hour away at the gym and he will rearrange himself. The truth is most men just like most human beings can adapt. The husband will adapt just like the wife will adapt and even the baby too would have to adapt to mommy not being there for two hours or so.

sihom: Efemena

Help me tell her, but my problem with these kinds of threads or rather you WOMEN in particular is that you are always the ones to cast the first stone at your fellow women and I just don't get it. You women seem oblivious of the challenges that exist for your gender.

A woman will be the first one to say something nasty like Shewa is 30+ single and frustrated, Look at you 4 years in marriage and you don't have children, my children are finer than yours and the list goes on and then now we have this weight issue thread asking why women let themselves go.

Why not ask us men why we let ourselves go? That question would be more befitting for my gender because we are not overly tasked or saddled with the responsibilities you women are. WHEN WILL ALL OF YOU (YES YOU WOMEN I'M TALKING TO YOU) LEARN THE BOND OF SISTERHOOD AND STICK TOGETHER AND STICK UP FOR EACH OTHER?

this thread is not a 'woman bashing thread' , it was created to talk about this problem and help create solutions. I did not talk about men because men don't give birth.

Despite all that's been said and done, I believe many of the married women who manage to get back in shape after giving birth, do so mainly because of the support they get from their spouses / husbands.

It's no use shouting from the rooftop that your wifey has let herself go. The valid question to ask is this: What are you doing to help and support her get back into shape?

Support her by giving her the time and space and a little 'me' time - and you'll be pleasantly surprised with the results.

Efemena_xy: Despite all that's been said and done, I believe many of the married women who manage to get back in shape after giving birth, do so mainly because of the support they get from their spouses / husbands.

It's no use shouting from the rooftop that your wifey has let herself go. The valid question to ask is this: What are you doing to help and support her get back into shape?

Support her by giving her the time and space and a little 'me' time - and you'll be pleasantly surprised with the results.

thats true. Another thing is the kind of lifestyle you had before the baby. If you are fit or if you have a healthy lifestyle of eating right and working out, it will also help because if you already know the value of exercise, you will find time to continue no matter how stressful it becomes. That is why singles shld also workout.

When single, they tend to do whatever is possible to attract a man for marriage then after they succeeded in catching one and have a baby or children, then anything can go. Anyway not all of them that behaves that way.

My attempt to wake up this thread!