Sometimes u meet a lady and everything falls in place,she makes you feel really comfortable to the extent of you expressing ur love after just 3weeks after u met.you may see everything you want in a wife in her during the first 2months,you wont even care abt her lil flaws cos shes close to perfection and every mans dream but my question is can a guy propose after 3 months? ladies can you accept his proposal after dating for just 3months

fijiano202: Sometimes u meet a lady and everything falls in place,she makes you feel really comfortable to the extent of you expressing ur love after just 3weeks after u met.you may see everything you want in a wife in her during the first 2months,you wont even care abt her lil flaws cos shes close to perfection and every mans dream but my question is can a guy propose after 3 months? ladies can you accept his proposal after dating for just 3months

No.

And if you're in that situation, I'll advice you to take a bit more time. There is more to marriage than just feeling comfortable with someone. You say you see everything you want in a wife in her - what exactly are you seeing?

The reason I ask is because you haven't mentioned sitting down to discuss important real-life issues that will eventually come up whilst married. For example, have you discussed finances? Career prospects when the children start arriving? Religion (assuming you're both from differing religious backgrounds) and many more.

Spending a couple more months getting to know each other better isn't asking too much especially if you plan on embarking on a life-long enterprise (marriage).

Bro thanks for the wonderful advice,it was wow and educative,i have questions ,how long should an engagement period take be marriage? assuming we delayed our wedding for a year is that enough for me to have serious future talk and understand her more?

^^ There are no set timeframes for how long one should wait to be deemed appropriate. The important thing is that you both discuss, discuss and discuss some more. You are both individuals in your own rights and are bound to have differing opinions on certain issues. Now is your golden opportunity to find out what they are, and lay them out bare, in the open.

Don't worry if it causes conflict between you both. Conflict is good and normal for a healthy relationship. The important thing (most important thing, I daresay) is how you both handle and resolve any conflict that arises. That is the true test of a relationship.

It seems like some pple always assume u r a guy Efe.
Even me, was suprised to c where somebody described me as a guy in romance section.
Why is it so?

Poster, slow down pls.
Don't rush in.
Study each other and discuss a lot(from d discussion, u will sieve a lot).
Ask, ask and ask relevant questions.
Most importantly depending on ur faith, seek God in prayer.

Efemena_xy: ^^ There are no set timeframes for how long one should wait to be deemed appropriate. The important thing is that you both discuss, discuss and discuss some more. You are both individuals in your own rights and are bound to have differing opinions on certain issues. Now is your golden opportunity to find out what they are, and lay them out bare, in the open.
Don't worry if it causes conflict between you both. Conflict is good and normal for a healthy relationship. The important thing (most important thing, I daresay) is how you both handle and resolve any conflict that arises. That is the true test of a relationship.

thanks for the comment and am really sorry for mistakes of identifying u as a Male Miss Efemena am not really good with igbo names

fijiano202: thanks for the comment and am really sorry for mistakes of identifying u as a Male Miss Efemena am not really good with igbo names

Lemme help you out here, she is a MRS, Efemena is delta not igbo.

Yes! I don't believe in long, STALE courtships!

I would say YESSSSS!!!! with excitement






if i am 50 and hitting menopause!!!

kreami diva: I would say YESSSSS!!!! with excitement
if i am 50 and hitting menopause!!!

i was like wow until i saw the menopause at 50 funny lol

SOMETIMES,WHEN I READ POST LIKE THIS,I FEEL SO DIFFERENT AND GREATFUL TO GOD.WHY DO I SAY SO,BECAUSE I MET A LADY,PROPOSE TO HER TWO WEEKS LATER.AT FIRST,SHE DECLINE BUT I WAS PATIENCE.IN LESS THAN TWO MONTHS LATER SHE ASK ME TO PROPOSE AGAIN.I WAS SO HAPPY AS I DID.A MONTH LATER,WE GOT MARRIED...BY NEXT MONTH IT WILL BE FOUR YRS SINCE WE GOT MARRIED.AND WE ARE VERY HAPPY...@POSTER,NO MATTER HOW LONG YOUR RELATIONSHIP GOES WITH A WOMAN,YOU MAY NEVER UNDERSTAND HER REAL SELF.BUT ONE THING YOU MUST UNDERSTAND IS TO BE A LOVABLE FIANCE TO A MORE WONDERFUL HUSBAND,AND LEAVE THE REST TO GOD....BUT MIND YOU,PRAY BEFORE DECISION...GOODLUCK

Depends on the mechanism you employed in understanding and understudying the person in question. Even if you stay in courtship for eons without adopting the right measures, it will still not be enough.

Yes, you can propose within three months of meeting a lady if only you know what you want and what to look out for in a woman away from frivolities. I proposed to my wife within 3months of meeting her. I have got no time for long courtship.

What I usually suggest is at least 6 months serious and exclusive dating where you live close together and see each other at least 1-2 times a week before proposal. No online or long distance

And before wedding few months (3months) of cohabitation

I want no surprises

dad007: SOMETIMES,WHEN I READ POST LIKE THIS,I FEEL SO DIFFERENT AND GREATFUL TO GOD.WHY DO I SAY SO,BECAUSE I MET A LADY,PROPOSE TO HER TWO WEEKS LATER.AT FIRST,SHE DECLINE BUT I WAS PATIENCE.IN LESS THAN TWO MONTHS LATER SHE ASK ME TO PROPOSE AGAIN.I WAS SO HAPPY AS I DID.A MONTH LATER,WE GOT MARRIED...BY NEXT MONTH IT WILL BE FOUR YRS SINCE WE GOT MARRIED.AND WE ARE VERY HAPPY...@POSTER,NO MATTER HOW LONG YOUR RELATIONSHIP GOES WITH A WOMAN,YOU MAY NEVER UNDERSTAND HER REAL SELF.BUT ONE THING YOU MUST UNDERSTAND IS TO BE A LOVABLE FIANCE TO A MORE WONDERFUL HUSBAND,AND LEAVE THE REST TO GOD....BUT MIND YOU,PRAY BEFORE DECISION...GOODLUCK

wow thats amazing,sometimes it doesnt take month to meet ur other half,when you see or meet them every other things fall in place

dayokanu: What I usually suggest is at least 6 months serious and exclusive dating where you live close together and see each other at least 1-2 times a week before proposal. No online or long distance

And before wedding few months (3months) of cohabitation

I want no surprises

Abeg, explain the bolded further...

OP, of you are grown enough to know you want to get married and you know what you want. Then go with your intuition and do what feels right to you. Some people have dated for 10years and are miserable. Others 2weeks and they are happily married. You should know who you are and should be honest with yourself about what you are looking for in a spouse. I feel if you go in with seriousness and with your head not your heart you will be able to make a sound decision. There is no set time, and there are no set rules. Do what you feel comfortable and satisfied with knowing this is a choice that may affect your life forever. Whether positively or negatively. But don't waste too much time. If she is someone any man would want to have, know that you are not the only one interested in her. She may think you are unserious and consider other proposals. Just show seriousness and carry out all your investigations, plans, questions and all. Goodluck

Efemena_xy:

Abeg, explain the bolded further...

Self explanatory na.. live together as couples for a whileand see what is hidden from everyone.

Not that after marriage you would discover that the guy snores, na paper tiger, or the girls boobs is small like groundnut hidden under padded bra. I even hear girls wear buttpads nowadays. Also the Efe test. Aka "missed p" at least once

Efemena_xy:

Abeg, explain the bolded further...

He said If the thing no fit stand now.
He does not want up fall up fall kin.

armyofone: He said If the thing no fit stand now.
He does not want up fall up fall kin.

When you see what lies beneath some push up bras its like bathroom slippers.

Honestly I have been with a girl that after removing the chest padding what was left was a flat chest with thick black n1pples

The kind of boobby pikin would even reject and point at armyofone's knockerss

Let me go sleep first

dayokanu:

When you see what lies beneath some push up bras its like bathroom slippers.

Honestly I have been with a girl that after removing the chest padding what was left was a flat chest with thick black nipples

The kind of booby pikin would even reject and point at armyofone's

dayokanu:

When you see what lies beneath some push up bras its like bathroom slippers.

Honestly I have been with a girl that after removing the chest padding what was left was a flat chest with thick black nipples

The kind of booby pikin would even reject and point at armyofone's

Buhahahaha


Padded everything.

Including padded character.

Lady tells you she has some bills to pay, and the bill is 230k but she has 180k saved up.
How won't you want to raise her the "small change" when she sef don "try"?


When in actual sense all the money she needed was just 50k.


Hahahaha.
I don meet people for life o.


Padded behaviour !!!!!

dayokanu:

Self explanatory na.. live together as couples for a whileand see what is hidden from everyone.

Not that after marriage you would discover that the guy snores, na paper tiger, or the girls boobs is small like groundnut hidden under padded bra. I even hear girls wear buttpads nowadays. Also the Efe test. Aka "missed p" at least once

Yes o!

I'm not into mind games. When a girl wants something, she'd better go for it. No time for sme-sme. Just grab that carrot while singing hallelujah from cloud 9 every evening, and make sure your tank is topped up wella in the morning before going to work.

***Disclaimer: For adults intending to get married only. Try Efe's method at your own risk. ***

dayokanu:

When you see what lies beneath some push up bras its like bathroom slippers.

Honestly I have been with a girl that after removing the chest padding what was left was a flat chest with thick black n1pples

The kind of boobby pikin would even reject and point at armyofone's knockerss

Dayo

That's sooooooo rude of you!

A sign of a desperate man o.
If he is Nigerian, I no marry
Next thing na to carry me do baby factory.

OYO.

An example below

zinnyy: Thanks Babymama for this great thread,
am actually going crazy bit by bit
my marriage is just 8 months old and am just not feeling it any longer
first of all, we didnt really court before marriage(no intimate meetings), although we've known each other for a year plus before marriage
after marriage, i found out that we are just so different
yes, he is all i wanted in a man, but our sex life is nothing to write home about
he was my first, but i know there is something about sex am missing
it's so bad now that i dont enjoy it any longer. he too is not a sex freak either
we can stay for a whole week without sex.
that one apart* i feel so not loved* he doesnt pet, cuddle and hardly call me pet names, when i try to tease him that he doesnt love me
he comes with this his favorite line* am not an emotional person i dont profess luv bt i act it* bla bla bla(still waiting for the action)
he complains a lot* your legs are like that of footballers, you should shave the hairs on your legs, so so person does it
i've always dated and wanted to marry a very fair lady and so on i cant write here
i asked him why he came to me since am not that fair
he said he didnt look at the physical, but the spiritual.

He is a good man though, but this was not what i bargained for.
still praying for a change.

Nope,i can't. IMO 6 months is even too small coz marriage is everlasting

Chillisauce: A sign of a desperate man o.
If he is Nigerian, I no marry
Next thing na to carry me do baby factory.

OYO.

Baby factory!....u can say that again.... I dread such guys like crazy ... What most of these desperate guys know, is impregnate the babe, sharp sharp... Then later, she's on her own...and excuses start coming up, of how extremely busy he is @ the office...infact he becomes incommunicado .....I no fit laugh....oh lord , save us from desperadoes....lol..

Why not? I could. Three months is more than enough time to get to know someone well and know if you guys have a future together. If you both know what you want , why the delay?

Poster it depends on many factors, like the maturity and sincerity of the couple involved. The truth is a wise man knows if he can marry a woman between 1 to 3 months of dating her so i don't believe in long and unnecessary courtships and i hate men who waste women time.

I mentioned sincerity to emphasize the place of openness and complete truth while both parties are dating. And there is this thing you cant explain, sometimes you just know she is the one.

I knew my woman was the one just after one month of meeting her but i never revealed my intentions until few months later. I just waited as a form of insurance not like i couldnt have proposed after 1 month. She also helped a great deal because i met a blunt and unpretentious lady. There was no drama.

I don't like long distance courtships they are capable of springing unpleasant surprises.