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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Culture / Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? (24369 Views)
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Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Abiagirl777(f): 7:29am On Jul 02, 2014 |
OP,u r Talking bunkum,you go fear international bride price conference. Why not Africans advocate elimination of white wedding which in my understandin is just anoda way to make de groom poorer. I hav attended a traditional wedding where the couple's pastor joined dem after de trad. Rites thunda fire anybody dat'll support dis OP 4 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by sebyluv(m): 7:31am On Jul 02, 2014 |
Tic4tac: This is complete Rubbish joor... Y sld we always adopt d white man's system.. I tire OOO Pls Wr r dey today? They still learn English, speak it, subtitle dr movies in english, write dr books in english and most of dem are still very poor up till dis day |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Anugod(f): 7:34am On Jul 02, 2014 |
mhizbanega: Oh, okay!! Where are you from?I am from Kogi state, an Igala by tribe. Although the tradition is peculiar to my own communal clan and not the whole tribe. 4 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by marvelito: 7:42am On Jul 02, 2014 |
its only d foolishnes and movies dat is makng OP talk dis way. Every community has its pride 4 dia daughters.dats d bride price. Let me tell dia is notin like white wedding d bible.d hebrews stick to dia traditnal marriage right til dat,so is d chinnese,indians,south america. White wedding is a religous tin nt traditnal.church wedding can nt hold without ur ppl aceptng a bride price.which makes traditnal rights superior.white wedding has too much errors aswel.tel me y somebdy shold ask me if i wil take a woman as my wife wen d family has given me as a wife.actualy b4 u went to d altar u were already married all those questn frm pastors are unecesary.ppl shld go to altar 4 church blessing.period. I dey vex 4 OP. 4 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by kechywillz(m): 7:51am On Jul 02, 2014 |
i like dis |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by mencade5(m): 7:52am On Jul 02, 2014 |
Op you must be drunk with staled palm wine. White wedding is not even christian tradition. Go and google it. It is a european tradition adopted so that the increased atrocities done those days by couples in europe should stop. Later christians adopted it into their system. Why do we africans always like copying things? Traditional rites tells that you actually have a beginning, a home, a people. Am ashamed that black people are tge most confused people on earth. Lokk at the asians, the indians, the chinese, japanese, arabs, up till today they still adopt their system. Op if you are lost then contonue to get lost in the white man's traditional. No wonder they keep trating us bad in that place, they dont respect us, they racially abuse us. They embarrass us in their airport for enough search whole other race are allowed without much disturbance. Na wa for una oooo 5 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by marvelito: 7:56am On Jul 02, 2014 |
sebyluv: This is sooooo true. I don't think d traditional rites shud b necessary anymore. If we have decided to embrace d xtian or muslim religion as most of us have, den our religious rite shud b enuf. it doesn't even make sense dat after d trad, couples r still not allowed by dr churches to have sex until dey r wedded in church. Away with all ds Senseless Trad rites and on with our Simple Church weddings.religion is nt traditn. Tell wia did Jesus turn water to wine. Synagouge abi na traditnal marriage, how abt jacob and isaac they both paid bride price 4 dia wives.if u study d bible u wil c dat its basics is d way of life of d hebrews.religion jst to guild them.wit d mentality we hv started havng abt ourselves in africa soon we wil b notin without d whites. 2 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Nobody: 7:56am On Jul 02, 2014 |
An extremely multi-faceted article. I'm not sure what to address first! I think about all this quite a bit. Like you, I'm on the fence regarding the topic of bride prices. Interesting are the sentiments expressed in the song you shared btw! Personally, I feel it's an outdated practice. Still, despite having been born and spent most of our time in the West, all my older siblings have gone the traditional route, bride price included. Not surprisingly, when I expressed my thoughts, my folks had the exact same old-world parental reaction expressed in the article; it was inconceivable. Nowadays, I've even noticed people compete in the areas of "grandest bride price" and "grandest wedding"! Inter-ethnic African unions/relationships are still full of hurdles, at least in my case, but I feel it shouldn't be so terribly hard to incorporate something of both cultures within the ceremony. Like you, I value the idea of a cultural wedding, and like you, I also feel there are quite a few traditional practices that are better buried in the past - weddings aside. It's very easy for those of us living outside the "box" to cherry pick what we like about our respective cultures, but there are those who live it everyday, and in reality it is they who hold the reigns. Changing even one aspect of a local culture is easier said than done. There is a certain comfort in tradition, and people are generally not creatures of change. Society also has a way of shaping the perceptions of the populace. Before some purist suffers an aneurysm: when I say change, I do not mean westernization but rather a local cultural innovation, especially within certain areas, and within reason. It shouldn't mean a complete change of identity. I feel we desperately need to free our minds in order to move forward. 4 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by stevikenna: 8:00am On Jul 02, 2014 |
people like the op make me wonder where we are going as nigerians.you want to do away with traditional marriage so na white wedding better pass abi..abeg op go park well 4 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Okeycima: 8:02am On Jul 02, 2014 |
CongoleseQueen: Marriage has an important significance in every society. In African societies, there are three marriage ceremonies, traditional, court and white. The traditional marriage is the most important of all three. It’s not just a celebration of unbinding love between two individuals – it’s the creation of a deep union between two families and communities.rubbish,nonsense infact what u r saying is a view of a person who do know and sont want to know about sometin,that which is AFRICAN TRADITION and culture.I said so becos had it been u know african culture and traditions u will know that's what made u an african man,ok let me ask u if we put and end to it what will we embrace?WHITE WEDDING or asian way of marriage?.if is the ist one then I can see that u must b a slave of western culture or civilization 1 Like |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by fejeerow(f): 8:05am On Jul 02, 2014 |
The only thing i critize abt traditional marriage is about when those village people starts demanding for ridiculous amount of money from d husband..them wan open market for our head....that s not far to me o...abi them want make my husband run? Anyways, i still love traditional marriage.....i respect my culture alot 3 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Amhappy(f): 8:05am On Jul 02, 2014 |
Check all those places you want us to copy OP and see how marriage institution have been bastardized. There is nothing wrong with brideprice,the greed involved is what should be curbed. 5 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Alexk2(m): 8:06am On Jul 02, 2014 |
] I'm with you on that except that the way and manner the said bride price is been collected and by who should be looked into. i totall disagree with the fact that in most african culture, relatives who didnt know anything about how the lady grew up are the major beneficiary..i mean, the parents are only given a little fractn from the whole lot... we should also ensure the burden are not too much on the guy since the bride isnt a commodity to be bought... in some culture (especially in the SS), bride price are mostly beyond par. 1 Like |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Nobody: 8:06am On Jul 02, 2014 |
This article is an illustration of how Africans don't fully appreciate Africa: the inferiority complex phenomenon. Now tell us writer, can the amount of money spent on engagement/wedding rings ( the symbol of white weddings ) not rather be converted to payment for bride price if we wish to economise? Why must it be the other way round? In fact, why spend money on white wedding at all; shouldn't the traditional marriage ceremony be sufficient by itself? If at all there's anything to fight for, then you should be fighting for Africa and not against Africa, because writing an article that somehow downgrades a legitimate African practice is fighting against Africa. That we are educated doesn't mean we should forget who we are. Well I can't say I know about you, but will tell you with authority that I AM AN AFRICAN. 7 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by mencade5(m): 8:08am On Jul 02, 2014 |
Anugod: In my place, we don't accept bride price.abeg i will like to come and marry in your place ooo. So many tribes in nigeria her selling their daughters from N200,000 to N5 million in that range in benue state and some south south and south eastern state. Please are you available 2 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by bukatyne(f): 8:10am On Jul 02, 2014 |
@OP: Nice article and I share your thoughts.The song you refed is also on point. The term bride price paints the woman as a good traded to the hubby. That's why you hear 'my husband's house' rather than 'my matrimonial home'. We have come a long way and still have a long way to go. Now, most tribes in Yorubaland return/do not request for it. I doubt most posters read the same article I read anyways. 2 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Alexk2(m): 8:10am On Jul 02, 2014 |
Abiagirl777 wa gbayi!...this is purely what i'll do by God's grace. |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by chucky234(m): 8:18am On Jul 02, 2014 |
shaggy007:Ignorance they say is a serious disease, from the article common sense will tell you that the writer is not a Nigerian. You prolly have problem understanding written texts. 1 Like |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Abiagirl777(f): 8:19am On Jul 02, 2014 |
Alexk2: the thing dey vex |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Nobody: 8:25am On Jul 02, 2014 |
Lets stop white wedding instead. 2 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by shaggy007(m): 8:26am On Jul 02, 2014 |
chucky234: Ignorance they say is a serious disease, from the article common sense will tell you that the writer is not a Nigerian. The smartest man on earth, do I look like someone that has the time to read a useless article? The topic says it all. If you went to a good school, you should know that when the topic of an article starts which a question, it means you are free to answer, whether you read the article or not. Smelly confused Aboki. 6 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by ewizard1: 8:28am On Jul 02, 2014 |
chucky234: Ignorance they say is a serious disease, from the article common sense will tell you that the writer is not a Nigerian. 1 Like |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Nobody: 8:33am On Jul 02, 2014 |
ITbomb: Rubbish, instead let's fine a way and stop white wedding, after the traditional wedding, the priest or Pastor should pray for the couple at the reception then they go and get registered at the court. Any method that will reduce the burden of expenditure incurred by men in getting a wife is welcome.. 1 Like |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by deandavid(m): 8:33am On Jul 02, 2014 |
most of these people complaining are from the east or probably married someone from the east, i know and very sure if u marrying a girl from imo state, u will pay the pride prize according to the level of education of the girl. in my tribe, we dnt do that, we dnt sell our girls, the pride prize is usually #10(not sure of the exact amount) or so and they give u #5 back telling they aint selling their daughter to u. and family do not demand some exorbitant fee what so ever, u buy, the father cap, walking stick and hot, then the mother wrapper, shoe and bag. then palm wine, some money to support. |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by ojubi(m): 8:33am On Jul 02, 2014 |
I will never marry a girl from Mbese, calabari in Rivers state, and Akwaibom as a whole. God4bit this people will milk you dry and give u a list as if u are going to open supper market. 2 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by cannonnier(m): 8:34am On Jul 02, 2014 |
DesChyko: Rather, the exhorbitant demand should be hashed.ours is especially cheap. A bride can wed for free if she wish. Money is a matter of ability, and whatever is paid goes to the bride's pocket, (it's her's). And ofcourse there is limit(something around 15k maximum). As I said earlier, ABILITY; if the groom wishes he can pay a MILLION. |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Nobody: 8:36am On Jul 02, 2014 |
aboyaji: could you imagine in december 2013, one of my cousins was having her traditional marriage and the village people were requesting a sum of 50k from her husband and when i asked, i was told that its their rite. That the money will be shared to the villagers. This money is being charged right there on the D-day. If him no bring am, katakata go dey for the traditional marriage o. bleep marriage rites How.much do you think is enough to waste before going home with your wife ? Don't let what you support hunt you in case you are still single.. |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Nobody: 8:38am On Jul 02, 2014 |
Well said. In some cultures, the groom takes huge loans just to cover the list. My friend married a 'certain tribe' and it W's mandated on him to send her brother to school aside the ridiculous list of 2000# that in like 15 places no be small money na. Hian It's the greed that needs to b addressed. I still insist, anything done in my father's large sitting room is good enough for me. I don't like crowds. This reception idea where you rent big hall and spend thousands is just silly. I'm in the events planning business and I know how unnecessary some events 'to do' can be. bukatyne: @OP: 1 Like |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Jilo83(m): 8:39am On Jul 02, 2014 |
Its a pity dat some don't understand what bride price means. Some even return d bride price with d notion dat their daughter is nt 4 sale. D bride family is wicked cos of all what groom family offered its only bride price (token meant 4 their daughter) is returned. What of other goods. BRIDE PRICE IS 4 D BRIDE NOT 4 D FAMILY. 1 Like |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Chrisjane(f): 8:43am On Jul 02, 2014 |
l feel there is no need for white wedding after traditional and vice versa. 4 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by obayaya(m): 8:48am On Jul 02, 2014 |
Africans always trying to be more English than the queen. Traditional Marriage over white wedding anytime, any day 5 Likes |
Re: Africa: Is It Time To Put An End To Traditional Wedding Rites? by Anugod(f): 8:59am On Jul 02, 2014 |
mencade5: abeg i will like to come and marry in your place ooo. So many tribes in nigeria her selling their daughters from N200,000 to N5 million in that range in benue state and some south south and south eastern state.Ha ha ha. Understanding matters. My people do it to safeguard their daughter's interests. Since they are not 'bought', no man has any right to maltreat them or demean their worth by treating them as common commodities. As for being available, I have many sisters, cousins, nieces, etc that are nice, lol. 3 Likes |
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