This is a no-holds-barred discourse for young women, waiting for the man of their dreams.

1) Define yourself; determine what you will or will not take, what standards and values you will not compromise on. I can tell a whole lot what you think about yourself by the kind of man you choose to be with. A girl who has low self confidence will give herself to any man at a huge discount. You must stand up for yourself, appreciate your strengths, downplay your weakness and decide the level of life you want to play at.

2) Don’t be with someone at any level lower than where you are at, socially, educationally or economically except you are convinced of his potentials and you are sure without a doubt that he is bigger than the place where he currently is.

3) He must bring more to the table than you do; he mustn’t be dependent on you in any way. He must have a place to stay, drive his own car and pay his own bills, the day you start to prop him up that day you have in your hands a liability. Don’t get me wrong here he doesn’t have to own a house or drive a car, however he shouldn’t be living in your apartment and driving the car you bought while you use public transport. After you are married, of course he should be able to use your things, perhaps life deals him a hard blow and he needs time to recuperate, that’s fine. But before the marriage, before you say I do, make sure he is not using you as a crutch.

4) He must buy you gifts; this is a sure sign that he is seriously with you. Do not take the lack of money as an excuse. The thought of giving you a gift no matter how inexpensive it is, is what is most important. He must get you a gift on your birthday at least. Note that if he forgot your birthday it’s not a crime, some people are bad with dates so that’s fine. He can make it a belated birthday gift.

5) You must be proud to show him off to your family and friends, he could be short and fat and ugly but if you love him, you will be fine with his looks.

6) Don’t manage him ever; if you don’t really know if you love him and are just cordial to him, you are probably with him because you feel you are getting old. Well wine gets finer with age so who cares, (flips weave). It’s better to be 40 and have peace than be 30 and unhappy with broken ribs.

7) Let him be the one to impress you not the other way round; before you are married to him, you shouldn’t be the one trying to impress him, you are the queen, the princess, it is on you that the choice ultimately rests. Now I am not saying that you should be high handed and rude. I am just saying be sure you are not doing for him, what he is supposed to do for you.

8. ) The people that matter most in your life should at least be comfortable with him, your parents and siblings and close friends.

9) Remember that he will not change the story of the princess kissing a frog and turning him into a prince is a fairytale. If he beats you, gets drunk, flirts around, is irresponsible before you get married, he will be exactly the same man after the marriage.

10) There are good men around; don’t think the good men have finished and stick to one who treats you badly. If he is treating you the way you do not want to be treated, don’t for once think that that is the way all men are. Be sure that he doesn’t have issues to deal with. If he was molested as a child, or came from a background of domestic violence the truth is that he will have issues to deal with. Be sure that you don’t want to live with the consequence of another person’s actions because you are special and you deserve the best.

So why settle for less…?

Copied from - http://femmelounge.ng/

nwao

Y not involve JTF or SSS...since its now by COMPULSION to get MARRIED.
MARRIAGE is now EMPLOYMENT.!!!!!
MARRIAGE is now permanent JOB!!!!

some women are daydreaming, and it is no joke o..... see madness!!!! instead of telling young women to BE HAPPY with what they have, here is the OP telling them to sell themselves to the highest spender, NONSENSE!

1) the following had me in tears:"A girl who has low self confidence will give herself to any man at a huge discount"...... with such state of mind, no wonder so many women fail in life.

2) what has levels got to do with anything? if you find someone, you love each other, he provides you with the care and attention you require....then, whether he is on a lower level in life than you (or not) its OK. most women who think like the OP are the ones who are quick to leave a man when he is down, and therefore these are women who are only worthy as mistresses. marrying a woman with such state of mind is the beginning of the end. if a woman does not value/desire you when you are down then she has no business being in your life when you are up!

3) another issue where people are failing miserably, when bringing more to the table than someone will automatically make it a better r/ship. a very poor state of mind, to say the least. if a man makes less than a woman then let them both work together to better their union. women who think with such state of mind dont know the meaning of UNION/UNIT and they are simply looking for a free ride in life. who wanna married such liability?

4) AY CARAMBA!!!!! when did gifts suddenly become a confirmation that someone was serious?! should women also give gifts to show that they are serious, or you are only on the receiving end of this gift nonsense? people should give gifts when their partner DESERVE ONE, and that YOU decide to give them one, nothing else!

6) yet men should manage women, right?!

7) it seems like the person who wrote these points is seriously lacking in self esteem. its all about ME ME ME! you guys should simply BE YOURSELF, thats all that matters in the long run, and thats what you will settle with when all the "fakeness" is gone. no wonder so many women are failing miserably in life, when men can pretend to be who they are not, and deluded women (with such poor state of mind) will fall for it.

8 ) if that man is good FOR YOU, then who really cares what anyone in your life thinks? only a clingy immature person would have such state of mind. if your parents/siblings and close friends are so important to you then let THEM go and find you a man, et voila.

9) and the same goes for deluded women who have poor/cheap state of mind.

10) there are also good women out there, no men should settle for some selfish immature person who has no idea what r/ship or marriage means. many people have had issues in their lives/past, and thats ok so long as they treat/care for you the right way TODAY. there are issues in life, and anyone who expects life to be without any issues is simply NOT ready for the real world, and is simply daydreaming.....and should certainly never be taken seriously. we are all the best, not just these women

If I had taken into consideration all these, I probably wont still be married now. Thank God I married in ignorance.