Dear Hiring Manager,

I am writing to indicate my interest in the Graduate
Management Trainee position currently advertised on Jobberman. The position really calls for qualifications and skills that represent my academic and professional background.

As a graduate of marketing and a chartered administrator, I am fully prepared to utilise my skills in this role. I have worked as a front desk officer in a four star hotel where I assisted in administrative and office support role, and also as a marketing executive intern at Accent Digital Resources where I developed social media platforms to generate leads, arranged and delivered sales presentation using PowerPoint at major events.

Aside meeting the qualifications and having developed my skills in various business settings, my research on the organisation’s services tally with my career ambitions.

I look forward to your response. Find attached a copy of my resume for review.

Yours faithfully,
Akpos Ebola (lol)

1.) Which one is Dear Hiring Manager
2.) Your letter doesn't have a title
3.) Everything is muddled up under a single lengthy paragraph
4.) You didn't introduce yourself well before jumping into your litany of experience

U re right abt d errors bt cover letter do nt hve tittle

purplesummer: 1.) Which one is Dear Hiring Manager
2.) Your letter doesn't have a title
3.) Everything is muddled up under a single lengthy paragraph
4.) You didn't introduce yourself well before jumping into your litany of experience

U re right abt d errors bt cover letter do nt hve tittle

Sherville:
U re right abt d errors bt cover letter do nt hve tittle

Really? Thanks for enlightening me

I'm sorry, is there a line or professionals of "chartered administrators" in Nigeria?...I mean "chartered"?
Isn't that only for accountants?

Crocz: I'm sorry, is there a line or professionals of "chartered administrators" in Nigeria?...I mean "chartered"?
Isn't that only for accountants?

Institute of Chartered Secretaries and Administrators

Crocz: I'm sorry, is there a line or professionals of "chartered administrators" in Nigeria?...I mean "chartered"?
Isn't that only for accountants?

. We do bro, its Chartered Institute of Administration of Nigeria (CIA). Google it for more details.

bakingsoda:
Institute of Chartered Secretaries and Administrators

Really?...just knowing o

Thanks anyways...gonna find out more

Cover letter is basically a highlight of your resumè or CV. As purplesummer rightly noted, u didn't highlight your personal information vividly cos that's what makes an employer even want to read your "Love letter" in the first place...(Due to the age limit ish in Naija job mkt). Try to give adequate paragraph for each point. Apart from these, its a thumbs up!

purplesummer: 1.) Which one is Dear Hiring Manager
2.) Your letter doesn't have a title
3.) Everything is muddled up under a single lengthy paragraph
4.) You didn't introduce yourself well before jumping into your litany of experience

. Thank you for your observation, cover letter does not have a title. I guess the introduction you mean is my educational background?

eduxerxes: Cover letter is basically a highlight of your resumè or CV. As purplesummer rightly noted, u didn't highlight your personal information vividly cos that's what makes an employer even want to read your "Love letter" in the first place...(Due to the age limit ish in Naija job mkt). Try to give adequate paragraph for each point. Apart from these, its a thumbs up!

. Thank you Eduxerxes for your wonderful inputs. I was thinking that the personal stuff wuld fall under the CV instead of repeating them on the letter.

Common guys I wouldn't change a thing on this letter. The English is perfecct and he has tried to highlight his expertise. The only thing missing is ur course of study? Age, and probably class of degree which should come in first paragraph. I came on the thread expecting to laugh but u proved me different. Nice write up.

michaeled45: Common guys I wouldn't change a thing on this letter. The English is perfecct and he has tried to highlight his expertise. The only thing missing is ur course of study? Age, and probably class of degree which should come in first paragraph. I came on the thread expecting to laugh but u proved me different. Nice write up.

. What an inspirational statement! Tanx a lot for ur observation Mic.

Godditex: . Thank you for your observation, cover letter does not have a title. I guess the introduction you mean is my educational background?

I think every cover letter has a title indicating the position you are applying for.

Godditex: . Thank you for your observation, cover letter does not have a title. I guess the introduction you mean is my educational background?

I think every cover letter has a title indicating the position you are applying for. Right?.

vycee01:

I think every cover letter has a title indicating the position you are applying for.

. Do you mean sumtin like......'RE: Sales Manager?'

michaeled45: Common guys I wouldn't change a thing on this letter. The English is perfecct and he has tried to highlight his expertise. The only thing missing is ur course of study? Age, and probably class of degree which should come in first paragraph. I came on the thread expecting to laugh but u proved me different. Nice write up.

It's "come on". No offense intended.

purplesummer: 1.) Which one is Dear Hiring Manager

Is this really wrong? na this salutation I dey use since oooooooo.

What is the right thing?

I tot u must include urs sincerely, name etc

HenryThegreat1: I tot u must include urs sincerely, name etc

You used dat wen u knw d name of d hiring manager, bt if u dnt, u use Dear sir/ma + urs faithfully.

Dis thread is really educating, thumbs up to everyone who has contributed..........oya toyde, sit down and learn.

First your letter should carry your name. The letter should be addressed to someone in particular ,try and include the name where possible. Where you found the job position and date if possible.There is no date on that letter. The company's name should be included if not the recruiter would think you are just lazy and that you send the same copy to every hr manager. Why are you interested in the position and the company. That should be there also . You readiness to be interviewed should be there also.it should be in a maximum of 4 paragraphs.

Please wen employers say candidates shld send dia cv, is it expected dat we also send a letter as an attachment or compose our letter as a mail and den attach our cv? Shld a cover letter carry a title also? Thanks for ur contributions.

Godditex: . Do you mean sumtin like......'RE: Sales Manager?'

Something like that, bolded and in the middle of the page after dear Sir/madam.

So they'll understand the intent of the letter.

On the issue of title or no title IMO, if you're writing a letter that you will attach separately it should have a title like: application for management trainee or whatever, nd should also include the 2 addresses: That's ur address nd theirs,theirs would read sth like
the human resources manager
....plc
Lagos......
Sir /Ma
then the title
with all the yours faithfully nd ur name.....
But on the other hand if u choose to just insert your cover letter in the body of the mail like I do most times, you could just leave out the title( the position applied for can be stated somewhere inside the body ) and start with Sir/Ma, there is no dear in that place cos it's a formal letter nd nobody will crucify u for not putting the name since we don't know their names most times, nd at the end you may decide to have the yours faithfully but I just use regards with my name on the next line.
the first paragraph should state briefly your course of study nd maybe ur grade but I don't think ur age has to be there. just try to put each idea in a paragraph so u have like 3 or 4 paragraghs not mumbling all of it up in one piece. aside that your cover letter is ok.

Noted

At OP,

Please note the following;

1. There is absolutely nothing wrong with Dear Hiring Manager or even Dear Human Resources Manager. This is an acceptable salutation (greeting) to use when you do not know the name of the person recruiting. Please do not use the phrase Dear Sir/Ma , its gone out of style in modern day professional communication.

2. A cover letter when written in email format can have a title in the subject line e.g. Executive Assistant then you proceed with the letter. DO NOT put a title within the body of your email. A hardcopy cover letter should have a title as well in capital letters and made bold.

3. A cover letter should be brief and simple, there's absolutely no need to introduce yourself personally your resume/CV can & should do that. If you can keep your cover letter to just 3 or 4 paragraphs its fine.

4. Personally I like your cover letter, It definitely caught my attention because you didn't ramble on and on, rather you went straight to the point selling yourself to me by telling me what you've done and what you can do plus your written English is good. If I were a hiring manager I would shortlist you for an interview.

5. Please Yours faithfully is acceptable BUT also out of style, I think Best Regards would work well.

6. I see paragraphs in your letter but they need to be clearly spaced out for easy reading.

If you're sending it by mail, the position you're applying for should be the subject of the mail. Eg. Application; Banking Officer.

Be careful with the age thing because the prospective employer may stop reading your letter the moment he discovers you're above the age limit he has in mind.

If you're sending it by mail, you don't need to add the company address or your address, but don't forget to add your name at the end.

sihom: At OP,

Please note the following;

1. There is absolutely nothing wrong with Dear Hiring Manager or even Dear Human Resources Manager. This is an acceptable salutation (greeting) to use when you do not know the name of the person recruiting. Please do not use phrase Dear Sir/Ma , its gone out of style in modern day professional communication.

2. A cover letter when written in email format can have a title in the subject line e.g. Executive Assistant then you proceed with the letter. DO NOT put a title within the body of your email. A hardcopy cover letter should have a title as well in capital letters and made bold.

3. A cover letter should be brief and simple, there's absolutely no need to introduce yourself personally your resume/CV can & should do that. If you can keep your cover letter to just 3 or 4 paragraphs its fine.

4. Personally I like your cover letter, It definitely caught my attention because you didn't ramble on and on, rather you went straight to the point selling yourself to me by telling me what you've done and what you can do plus your written English is good. If I were a hiring manager I would shortlist you for an interview.

5. Please Yours faithfully is acceptable BUT also out of style, I think Best Regards would work well.

6. I see paragraphs in your letter but they need to be clearly spaced out for easy reading.

I really appreciate you for taking time to peruse d letter and ur wonderful contribution. Gracias!

vycee01:

Something like that, bolded and in the middle of the page after dear Sir/madam.

So they'll understand the intent of the letter.

Read d comments below to find out.

@ OP

You are welcome but please always remember to paragraph and punctuate your work appropriately.

If you sent me that letter the way it is, here on NL I'll throw it out even though I like your written English and the content of the letter.

I can't stand it when people stress my eyes unnecessarily because I have eye problem. LOL