crackhaus:
Going to the farm, birthing babies, and doing all the household work plus cooking is how you want to be treated?

that's how I treat my wife
and she loves it

alutacontinua:

that's how I treat my wife
and she loves it

I hear ya

Mondisweets: this is 2014 women are now helping them so half of their role of putting food on the table

lemme get this straight, are you saying now its supposed to be some sort of responsibility for the husband to handle chores simply beacause the wife earns too?

Mondisweets: so if he can't pay all the bills solely for sometime and he asks her to "help out with the bills" will it come out as rude?

don't get this wrong, my point is its not a bad idea to help your spouse with chores.. But its a choice.. Just because she supports her husband should not make it a must for him to handle some chores! Na!

Dam007, do you expect your working wife to contribute financially to your household? If so, then she has same choice as you when house chores are concern. So you expect her help pay the bills with her salary and MUST do all house chores duty. But you, who also have salary and contribute financially only HAVE CHOICE to do house chores??

Ok, did I even read that correctly?

alutacontinua: As a real african man that I am, I believe women should do their job in the kitchen and let me do mine in the bedroom

dam007: don't get this wrong, my point is its not a bad idea to help your spouse with chores.. But its a choice.. Just because she supports her husband should not make it a must for him to handle some chores! Na!

no one said its mandatory but ordinary common sense will tell u that if she works just as hard as you to put food on the table, its logical to help her at home because as someone of the "weaker sex" like u like to call them she wont be able to deal with the work load on a daily basis by herself.

If u expect her to help u with the bills, then expect her to require your help with house chores. If u don't expect her to help with financial contributions, only then will it be understandable if u decide not to help her with house chores

@ topic
There's no 'view' when the wife is winning bread alongside hubby. It's normal. It's what a responsible wife does.

But when the man needs to do his share of house keeping, 'view' enters the equation.

All these views you're viewing.
Ok.
Kontinuu

Yea just like it's her 'choice' to decide to support the home financially or not.

Some men be wanting to eat their cakes and have it since 1900bc

dam007: don't get this wrong, my point is its not a bad idea to help your spouse with chores.. But its a choice.. Just because she supports her husband should not make it a must for him to handle some chores! Na!

dam007: lemme get this straight, are you saying now its supposed to be some sort of responsibility for the husband to handle chores simply beacause the wife earns too?

exactly she cant be doing 50% of your role and u still expect her to do 100% of her role by herself. Its common sense, she wont be able to balance the 2 alone

No.
If they both get back from work like say 7pm,
She's supposed to rush into the kitchen and handle that with some martha stewart prowess,bathe,feed the kids,help them with their homework and tuck them into bed simultaneously,while running the laundry in the back and cleaning the house that y'all probably left in a mess while hurrying to work.

Oh let me not forget. Do the dishes meanwhile checking your favorite dinner so it doesn't burn.
Then serve you delicious poundo yam with banga soup in front of the Telly where you've been stretched out before retiring for the night.

To wake up early next morning to prepare you for work and the kids for school/daycare while preparing herself too.

If you help out with house work,you're being kind and generous but
If she helps out with the bread winning,it's her responsibility

,

dam007: lemme get this straight, are you saying now its supposed to be some sort of responsibility for the husband to handle chores simply beacause the wife earns too?

OmoAlata1: Dam007, do you expect your working wife to contribute financially to your household? If so, then she has same choice as you when house chores are concern. So you expect her help pay the bills with her salary and MUST do all house chores duty. But you, who also have salary and contribute financially only HAVE CHOICE to do house chores??

Ok, did I even read that correctly?

my favorite part of your post!? Your last question! Hell to the "NO" you missed the point...

Mondisweets: no one said its mandatory but ordinary common sense will tell u that if she works just as hard as you to put food on the table, its logical to help her at home because as someone of the "weaker sex" like u like to call them she wont be able to deal with the work load on a daily basis by herself.

If u expect her to help u with the bills, then expect her to require your help with house chores. If u don't expect her to help with financial contributions, only then will it be understandable if u decide not to help her with house chores

hey!! Did you read the post? No offense.. Not hating on your point either.. I don't remember including finance in the equation... I'm actually on the same side with you.

cococandy: No.
If they both get back from work like say 7pm,
She's supposed to rush into the kitchen and handle that with some martha stewart prowess,bathe,feed the kids,help them with their homework and tuck them into bed simultaneously,while running the laundry in the back and cleaning the house that y'all probably left in a mess while hurrying to work.

Oh let me not forget. Do the dishes meanwhile checking your favorite dinner so it doesn't burn.
Then serve you delicious poundo yam with banga soup in front of the Telly where you've been stretched out before retiring for the night.

To wake up early next morning to prepare you for work and the kids for school/daycare while preparing herself too.

If you help out with house work,you're being kind and generous but
If she helps out with the bread winning,it's her responsibility

,

Exactly the point I seek to justify.. Please read the post again if you don't get my stand on this... I'm clearly saying.. Contrary to what most men believe.. Its not such a wrong idea.. Besides.. A smart wife most likely wouldn't even expect you to do chores with her when she knows you should be at work... I help my partner often coz the nature of my job leaves me more time.. and she returns quite late and tired often.. Its only fair of me to at least lend a hand.. The contention here is this.. I FEEL ITS BY CHOICE, AND NOT OBLIGATORY ON THE MAN'S PART.. The only defense most ladies rely on is his efficiency as a husband!

If finances are shared then chores too should be shared

Mondisweets: dont mind some of these goats they scream gender equality when its only to their benefit and then scream african culture and values when it comes to another thing

i feel your comment is drastically discourteous considering the fact that the thread requested your opinion, not criticism.. Please read the post before commenting next time!

dam007: i feel your comment is drastically discourteous considering the fact that the thread requested your opinion, not criticism.. Please read the post before commenting next time!

last time i checked giving criticism still is expressing an opnion please consult your dictionary before commenting next time

Mondisweets: last time i checked giving criticism still is expressing an opnion please consult your dictionary before commenting next time

before you criticize next time I suggest you read the post, digest it or probably have someone explain it to you, then you may pass a comment that's in line with the post.

I got you clearly the first time.
No it is not by choice. That's my point.
When two people are married,you don't 'chose' to help or not when it pleases you.
You're under obligation to help.

I'd spit fire at any woman who prefers to fold her hands and watch her husband suffer alone to cater for the whole family's every need when she has the means to help but prefer to stand on the sideline because it's not her traditional role.
Or choses to help out sparingly because the man should be doing it.
Or seeks special awards and recognition because she helps him.

So why will I agree that the man should 'chose' to help in her own area?
I prefer to say he's obliged to help.

dam007: Exactly the point I seek to justify.. Please read the post again if you don't get my stand on this... I'm clearly saying.. Contrary to what most men believe.. Its not such a wrong idea.. Besides.. A smart wife most likely wouldn't even expect you to do chores with her when she knows you should be at work... I help my partner often coz the nature of my job leaves me more time.. and she returns quite late and tired often.. Its only fair of me to at least lend a hand.. The contention here is this.. I FEEL ITS BY CHOICE, AND NOT OBLIGATORY ON THE MAN'S PART.. The only defense most ladies rely on is his efficiency as a husband!

dam007: before you criticize next time I suggest you read the post, digest it or probably have someone explain it to you, then you may pass a comment that's in line with the post.

because i gave my opinion you disagree with?

Come to think of it, marriage is suppose to be about friendship, love, mutual respect, loyalty, and submissiveness (list is not exhausted). Going by that, helping your wife with the chores shouldn't be much of a problem especially when you do it willingly. It's high time we stop this mentality of seeing our partner as another person. I mean, doing chores should be a nice way of starting the weekend. In 2014, we should open our mind and stop holding on to the archaic mentality that it's a woman's duty to do all chores. For someone like me that adores a neat home (I believe we all do), helping should be very easy for me.



I see it more as being insensitive sitting on the couch with remote control in hand watching my darling Arsenal FC gun down opponents while she labours from kitchen to toilet, to sweeping the compound, the living room and bedroom, and to the market and back to the kitchen again. Haba!!! If you marry someone whom you have deep emotional connection with built on genuine friendship, then house chores will be fun for both of you.

^^bless you.

cococandy: I got you clearly the first time.
No it is not by choice. That's my point.
When two people are married,you don't 'chose' to help or not when it pleases you.
You're under obligation to help.

I'd spit fire at any woman who prefers to fold her hands and watch her husband suffer alone to cater for the whole family's every need when she has the means to help but prefer to stand on the sideline because it's not her traditional role.
Or choses to help out sparingly because the man should be doing it.
Or seeks special awards and recognition because she helps hims.

So why will I agree that the man should 'chose' to help in her own area?
I prefer to say he's obliged to help.

I humbly align myself with your position... I think its more about the individuals.. Because from that aspect, everything is shared! Got that candy! thankss

Mondisweets: because i gave my opinion you disagree with?

because your "opinion" is clearly not on the post!

SirBigH: Come to think of it, marriage is suppose to be about friendship, love, mutual respect, loyalty, and submissiveness (list is not exhausted). Going by that, helping your wife with the chores shouldn't be much of a problem especially when you do it willingly. It's high time we stop this mentality of seeing our partner as another person. I mean, doing chores should be a nice way of starting the weekend. In 2014, we should open our mind and stop holding on to the archaic mentality that it's a woman's duty to do all chores. For someone like me that adores a neat home (I believe we all do), helping should be very easy for me.



I see it more as being insensitive sitting on the couch with remote control in hand watching my darling Arsenal FC gun down opponents while she labours from kitchen to toilet, to sweeping the compound, the living room and bedroom, and to the market and back to the kitchen again. Haba!!! If you marry someone whom you have deep emotional connection with built on genuine friendship, then house chores will be fun for both of you.

I'm of that stand too actually.. Its just as tho the society has a different view of it

dam007: because your "opinion" is clearly not on the post!

how old are u on a serious note though?

I simply stated the fact that you dont have to wait to help someone simply because she is too tired or she is unable to do something. Its your house and if u contributed to the mess it only requires common sense that to u help even she is not too tired or unable to do something. The same way a woman doesnt have to wait for bills to choke her husband before she decides to pitch in and make things easier for the both of them

and the romance is kept alive

dam007: I humbly align myself with your position... I think its more about the individuals.. Because from that aspect, everything is shared! Got that candy! thankss

Pics of some GOGA or Adonbilivit

alutacontinua:

that's how I treat my wife
and she loves it

Mondisweets: how old are u on a serious note though?

I simply stated the fact that you dont have to wait to help someone simply because she is too tired or she is unable to do something. Its your house and if u contributed to the mess it only requires common sense that to u help even she is not too tired or unable to do something. The same way a woman doesnt have to wait for bills to choke her husband before she decides to pitch in and make things easier for the both of them

honestly, i think there' s a huge misunderstanding here... the reason i quoted that initial comment was because you went too far and if you ask me i'd say we're saying pretty much the same thing... i am basically saying its not what applies in most families.. besides the post included my stand on the issue.. matter of fact, i see it as stupidity and unfairness to think because you pay the bills, you have the ground not to help or that helping is irrelevant because you play your role as a husband! get it And btw, i have no idea as to why my age is in question.. mind telling me? mondi?

OmoAlata1: Dam007, do you expect your working wife to contribute financially to your household? If so, then she has same choice as you when house chores are concern. So you expect her help pay the bills with her salary and MUST do all house chores duty. But you, who also have salary and contribute financially only HAVE CHOICE to do house chores??

Ok, did I even read that correctly?

Babe, I don't know if you married or not...but quit the fronting and foaming at the mouth.

If your husband says/decides his not in the mood or for some other reasons, chooses not to do chores...you ain't gonna do nothing about it.
You ladies should try being real here for once. The worst you would do is still ask him nicely or talk about it.

I guarantee that you and the other females on here would never leave it (chores) undone because your husband(s) didn't do it.
Men who help with chores do it because they want to, not because they're supposed to...the best a woman can wish and be thankful for is that she marries/married a man who's willing to help.

Actually no one can force anyone to do anything they don't want to do.
At most it will lead to serious tension and/or breakdown.
I'm sure no one wants that for their marriage.
The scenario you painted would also apply if your wife decides she's not going to help out financially.
What will you do crackhaus?

crackhaus:
Babe, I don't know if you married or not...but quit the fronting and foaming at the mouth.

If your husband says/decides his not in the mood or for some other reasons, chooses not to do chores...you ain't gonna do nothing about it.
You ladies should try being real here for once. The worst you would do is still ask him nicely or talk about it.

I guarantee that you and the other females on here would never leave it (chores) undone because your husband(s) didn't do it.
Men who help with chores do it because they want to, not because they're supposed to...the best a woman can wish and be thankful for is that she marries/married a man who's willing to help.

cococandy: Actually no one can force anyone to do anything they don't want to do.
At most it will lead to serious tension and/or breakdown.
I'm sure no one wants that for their marriage.
The scenario you painted would also apply if your wife decides she's not going to help out financially.
What will you do crackhaus?

Why wouldn't she want to help out if she has the means?

I'm sorry, but your question is highly unlikely.