I have a friend who is currently going through a rough patch in his married life. He has been married for three years. According to him, he started to suspect his wife of heist after a year of marriage. His money would disappear whenever he is not careful with its safe keeping at home. At a point, he had to confront her but she denied flatly and the matter caused a lot of problems in the marriage. So, in order not to shatter his young marriage, he decided to mellow and let things return to normalcy. Now what is causing him great headache, according to him, is that she seems to have taken the ignoble behaviour outside when two days ago a missing phone was found in her possession. When questioned to know how the phone came into her possession she blatantly told the crowd, that had gathered to search for the phone, that she saw the phone rigging and decided to keep it for the owner. This excuse is flimsy because she deliberately switched off the phone after she had 'taken' it and even when the phone owner checked it after she had given him back the phone, he did not see any missed call. This is happening just after my friend bought her a brand new phone worth 28k while he uses a phone worth 5k. He is just discombobulated by her act because the whole affair seems to be getting worse by the day. According to him, the thought of him spending his whole life with her is increasingly becoming torturous to him. He is scared to death that some day she might be caught in a market, which we all know is the peak of that shameful act, and drench him with embarrassment. I've also done my investigations on her and what I unearthed seems to corroborate the bad image she is projecting as many a friend of hers told me many cases of her stealing money and valuables. I don't know how truthful their accounts are and have decided not to share it with her husband. When I queried them why they didn't tell my friend this invaluable pieces of information before he married their friend, they said they had to play safe and didn't want to pour sand into their friend's proposed marriage garri. The question is: How do you deal with a wife that steals? And what advice should I give to my friend, her husband?

This woman has a problem. She's suffering from kleptomania. And the only solution to this is prayers and communication. The husband needs to sit down and talk to his wife. Maybe she's not satisfied with what she has, or it could just be greed. Anyhow, he needs to know the reason behind this problem. He could also visit a counsellor to advice him on what he could do. As for me, if my husband steals, because of love I will not leave him. I believe there is a God who is the solution to all my problems.

marieolae: This woman has a problem. She's suffering from kleptomania. And the only solution to this is prayers and communication. The husband needs to sit down and talk to his wife. Maybe she's not satisfied with what she has, or it could just be greed. Anyhow, he needs to know the reason behind this problem. He could also visit a counsellor to advice him on what he could do. As for me, if my husband steals, because of love I will not leave him. I believe there is a God who is the solution to all my problems.

She dey steal money, she dey steal phone, SHE B Unarmed Robber......

is she a young lady?.

she needs deliverance.
she should also be punished for petty theiving. 2 nights in a police cell will do.

belamour:

She dey steal money, she dey steal phone, SHE B Unarmed Robber......

lmao

Lol.. God forbid I marry this kinda wife.

marieolae: This woman has a problem. She's suffering from kleptomania. And the only solution to this is prayers and communication. The husband needs to sit down and talk to his wife. Maybe she's not satisfied with what she has, or it could just be greed. Anyhow, he needs to know the reason behind this problem. He could also visit a counsellor to advice him on what he could do. As for me, if my husband steals, because of love I will not leave him. I believe there is a God who is the solution to all my problems.

I doubt if it is a case of kleptomania. The communication option appears more plausible to me and will be tried. You know Nigerians are religious and my friend belongs to that group.

You need to tell her parents before she disgraces you further. They brought her up and you need to tell them what she has turned into. Tell them before you hear one day that your wife has been beaten and her clothes torn in public for stealing.

berem: You need to tell her parents before she disgraces you further. They brought her up and you need to tell them what she has turned into. Tell them before you hear one day that your wife has been beaten and her clothes torn in public for stealing.

I will certainly pass across this your contribution. You sounded like I'm the victim when I'm only a friend. He is a fast friend and I'm seeking advice on behalf of him because a friend in need is a friend indeed.

Welrez: I will certainly pass across this your contribution. You sounded like I'm the victim when I'm only a friend. He is a fast friend and I'm seeking advice on behalf of him because a friend in need is a friend indeed.

the advice is for your friend and not you. Does it look like I am advising you?

berem: the advice is for your friend and not you. Does it look like I am advising you?

It reads so. All the same, your advice is welcomed. Thanks.

She needs prayers, counselling and deliverance.
But wait oh, didn't your friend notice this trait while they were dating. It couldn't have been possible to hide going by the writeup.

If she is stealing ur money, I don't think there is any big deal, all u need do is to be very careful. I wud have said u shud sit her down and talk to her to know what her problem is, but its obvious her problem is well known. Just call a family meeting on her head. If it persists, get her arrested. Afterall thieves are meànt to face the law.

A One-Hour compulsory Heart to Heart talk would do the miracle. He should ask her to highlight her problem, if she's okay with stealing or she find it difficult to withhold herself from picking anything unfamiliar (her own).

If she finds it okay, try to tell her the effects as well as the dangers in it.. all in an attempt to discourage her because if she likes it then deliverance would be hard.

But if she finds it hard to stay away from what belongs to her, then start a series of prayers with her.. alongside fasting ( please do the fasting alone to avoid stories of her legitimately stealing for food) since there is nothing God cannot do.. see a Pastor or a counsellor and also her parents to know if the thing is in their lineage or its just her..

But in all DON'T STOP LOVING HER.. as Love is the solution to all problems..

ERF: A One-Hour compulsory Heart to Heart talk would do the miracle. He should ask her to highlight her problem, if she's okay with stealing or she find it difficult to withhold herself from picking anything unfamiliar (her own).

If she finds it okay, try to tell her the effects as well as the dangers in it.. all in an attempt to discourage her because if she likes it then deliverance would be hard.

But if she finds it hard to stay away from what belongs to her, then start a series of prayers with her.. alongside fasting ( please do the fasting alone to avoid stories of her legitimately stealing for food) since there is nothing God cannot do.. see a Pastor or a counsellor and also her parents to know if the thing is in their lineage or its just her..

But in all DON'T STOP LOVING HER.. as Love is the solution to all problems..

One knotty side to this issue is that the wife has refused to agree to the glaring fact that she is a thief, and any attempt to make her feel or look so has been rebuffed. This is one aspect that complicates the whole matter. This is partly due to the fact that she is yet to be caught red-handed pilfering either money or valuables. The case about the phone is the closest she has had. I've accepted your advice and I deeply appreciate it.

Meaning she perfectly pretended all through your courting days,which in turn means she might have more surprises to show you,which means you should tighten your seat belt and expect more or you should take her øn a monkey journey back to her parents.Counselling might help

Wives who do steal re not fit to be call wives, stealin is work for umarried girls roamin the street but it is unfortunate that some house wives do steal. His nitemare of her been caught in the market stealin maybe realistic if he dont take some drastic action. You friend is fortunate to found a thief as a spouse...my heart fell for him

marieolae: This woman has a problem. She's suffering from kleptomania. And the only solution to this is prayers and communication. The husband needs to sit down and talk to his wife. Maybe she's not satisfied with what she has, or it could just be greed. Anyhow, he needs to know the reason behind this problem. He could also visit a counsellor to advice him on what he could do. As for me, if my husband steals, because of love I will not leave him. I believe there is a God who is the solution to all my problems.

I bet men dont engage themselves in all these petty petty stealin...thou you are right on the counsellin idea

If you check that woman out she will also have a common trait that unifies GREED, STEALING AND CHEATING........the ability to lie without shame!

Your friend may have bigger issues to deal with. You cannot separate one from the other.

Hmmm husband don enter one chance be that o. If it were his wallet alone one can peg it to husband's stinginess Whew!

Since she denies,let him set her up and catch her red handed. Then they can talk,seek counsel and pray. You have to accept there is a problem to handle it.

This would be soooo embarassing and the husband could be one of those who doesnt like his business in the public eye, I so pity him. The main issue is: does the wife realise she has a problem? Till she can admit her wrong and is ready for change, the husband would just be running from pilar to post without results. If after counselling she keeps it up, locking her up in a police cell for a few days like someone suggested wouldnt be a bad idea. My fear for her is being lynched to death by an angry crowd, knowing my fellow nigerians, this wouldnt be too difficult for stealing a 2k5 phone.

How did your friend not notice when they were dating?

There are real horror videos, local content of people brutally killed for stealing things as petty as pepper. I suggest your friend plays one for the wife, let her know that such fate would befall her soon.

Counselling is also a good one. Problem is where would they see such a counsellor in Naija?

Welrez: One knotty side to this issue is that the wife has refused to agree to the glaring fact that she is a thief, and any attempt to make her feel or look so has been rebuffed. This is one aspect that complicates the whole matter. This is partly due to the fact that she is yet to be caught red-handed pilfering either money or valuables. The case about the phone is the closest she has had. I've accepted your advice and I deeply appreciate it.

Thats the problem.. so in this case, she dont agree to steal.

That means you've got to start praying before it gets outta hand.. maybe gets you into trouble.

One other thing is you getting to knw her friends, they might be of help too for you to know where to start tackling the problem from.. its really a problem.

@alll

We shouldnt talk about their courtship or dating times, that's past and cant be changed. But something can be dne to the present..

odikwa serious o nothing we never see for nl, from cheating wife, selfish wife, witch wife and now stealing wife @op, your friend's wife must have stolen something belonging to someone during her youthful age and she denied it, hence a curse was placed on her that she would continue to steal. If not her then it should be her parents. Find out from them and the only thing they can do to break the curse is restitution.

Welrez: One knotty side to this issue is that the wife has refused to agree to the glaring fact that she is a thief, and any attempt to make her feel or look so has been rebuffed. This is one aspect that complicates the whole matter. This is partly due to the fact that she is yet to be caught red-handed pilfering either money or valuables. The case about the phone is the closest she has had. I've accepted your advice and I deeply appreciate it.

Was going to say that it'd be difficult to have a heart to heart with her if she keeps denying stealing the items. Deliverance is the best option. There is something wrong somewhere. But like a poster said, let your friend keep loving her. Marriage is for better for worse.me

She needs Jesus..

kreamidiva:


Was going to say that it'd be difficult to have a heart to heart with her if she keeps denying stealing the items. Deliverance is the best option. There is something wrong somewhere. But like a poster said, let your friend keep loving her. Marriage is for better for worse.me

I dont wanna say it cuz it may hurt my believe as xtian buh it seem not right to continue to habour a criminal in my house. i will next time hand over to the police or send her packin...better to remain a divoucee than to leave with a criminal as a spouse

Ivanspring: She needs prayers, counselling and deliverance.
But wait oh, didn't your friend notice this trait while they were dating. It couldn't have been possible to hide going by the writeup.

He couldn't have noticed. 'Pastor' would have said they must not spend so much time together or sleep over. LoL. Personally, I believe a faulty dating stage made him unable to detect. From the psychology point of view, they need to know why she steals and offer physiotherapy and counselling. If such is unchecked, a person who steals can kill.

I do agree with the suggestion that she be set up and arrested,it is while there in a jail cell,that she be strongly rebuked.

Exjoker: I dont wannsma say it cuz it may hurt my believe as xtian buh it seem not right to continue to habour a criminal in my house. i will next time hand over to the police or send her packin...better to remain a divoucee than to leave with a criminal as a spouse

I tell you my brother, that is the best time to show her unconditional love. Prayer is the key. Pray for her, fast for her and protect her from outsiders. At least you owe her that much.