“Hi Ray. I was listening to a debate you had the other day and I was very happy to hear you say you don't hear Gods voice in your head. I am trying to develop a relationship with God, but how do I know he hears me and wants a relationship with me? ...How do you know your relationship with God is real?” Bob Solo

Christians often talk about hearing God audibly speak to them. I’m not saying that He doesn’t, but I find that when I press these people, although they are sincere in their convictions, they either don’t know the difference between God speaking to them and the voice of their conscience. Or they had an “impression” that God was telling them to do something, but they didn’t really hear a “voice.” It’s a matter of Christianese, and it’s sometimes rooted in pride.

We speak to God through prayer and He speaks to us through His Word. The Bible says of itself that it's "a lamp to our feet and a light to our path." People who continually hear voices “in their head” should get professional help, preferably their pastor.
To express an important point, let’s liken your desire to develop a relationship with God to trying to develop a relationship with the Queen of England. Should you write a letter, make a phone call, and then wait for her to drop around to your house? More than likely you’d be waiting for a long time. If you are fortunate enough to get an audience with The Queen you would have to go on her terms. You may have to clean up a little, wear a suit and tie, comb your hair, and humbly stand to one side until you are called.

Now put that thought on steroids. You are asking about getting an audience, not with another human being, but with the Creator of the Universe, the One who gave you your life, and Him who justly proclaimed the death sentence upon you because of your sins. You want a relationship with the One who is absolute moral perfection, when we are criminals in His holy eyes, calling for nothing but His wrath.
If you find that hard to believe it will almost certainly be because you don’t see how holy He is, and how sinful we are. To get a tiny glimpse of this, do this test with a humble and honest attitude: www.needGod.com It will help you to go in the direction you need to go…if you want to find everlasting life.

To your last question: “How do you know your relationship with God is real?” First, I know He is real because the alternative is to believe the impossibility that nothing created everything. Creation (nature) tells us that there is a Maker. I then know that my relationship with Him is real because He transformed my life in an instant. In a moment I was “born again,” with a deep love for my Creator, when I didn’t give Him one second’s serious thought in the entire 22 years of my godless life. That fact blew me away and 40 years later it still leaves me with my mouth open.

There are many other ways to know that my relationship with Him is real (the dead and dry Bible coming alive, its prophecies substantiating its inspiration, a love for other Christians I didn’t have before, an all-consuming desire to do what pleases God, a hatred for the sin I once loved, etc.) But it all comes down to trust rather than subjectivity, and that childlike trust rests on this immutable biblical foundation: “It is impossible for God to lie.” He is faithful. Start with that premise and you won’t go wrong.

Source: www.livingwaters.com