Courtesy of MyThoughtsToScreenBlog



I have tried to refrain from
commenting on the issue of people (especially
men) and infidelity in relationships/marriage simply
because I feel the issue has been really
overemphasized over time. I feel the question
“WHY DO MEN CHEAT?” is now somewhat similar
to the question “WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS
THE ROAD? ” (when I was being asked in nursery
and primary school). But in my heart and soul I
felt this was worth breaking my restraints for.
I decided to turn on the car stereo on my way
home from work a few days back and there was
this “relationship” show on. Listeners with
relationship issues to share or seek solutions to
called in or sent messages.


The first call I listened to was from a married man,
he said he had been married for about four years
and he has been cheating on his wife since the
first year of their marriage and that he’s aware its
wrong (oh yes he actually called to report himself).
He went on to say that it wasn’t technically his
fault. Apparently in the first year of their marriage,
the girl (who happens to be their neighbour) came
on to him (yes, she did know he was married; I
shall address this other issue some other time)
and he couldn’t resist the temptation. He
concluded by saying that his wife knew about it
and she knows “THAT’S HOW MEN ARE” and she
has been hoping he’ll CHANGE and as such she
hasn’t taken any DRASTIC measures.


The second caller was a lady who I termed to be
quite very stupid (forgive my language). According
to her, after dating the guy for about four years, he
asked her to get pregnant for him before he could
marry her, out of love stupidity she agreed. After
she got pregnant he left her for someone else, and
she didn’t hear from him again. She had the child
and on the child’s second birthday, he came back
begging. My question is “ where he go since?”
After 2years and 8 or 9months She concluded
by saying she thinks he has CHANGED and as
such she’s considering taking him back.
The third call was from a woman who said she had
been married for 35years (since 1979) and her
husband had been promiscuous one time or the
other but she had always looked the other way
because she knows “MEN ARE BOUND TO CHEAT”.
But then he started dating their daughter’s friend,
she then had to confront him, but he still didn’t
stop.


I listened in till the end of the show and all
through, only one guy called in to share a situation
with his ex girlfriend. It’s either men weren’t
interested in pouring out their issues on air or
women aren’t cheating on their men (which is an
absolute lie by the way, so I’m picking the first
option). The movement and awareness against
men cheating has gained even more voice than the
fight against HIV/AIDS and EVD combined and
yet……


After a little pondering, I coined a conclusion in my
head; MEN won’t change or have refused to
change because of WOMEN. Yes WOMEN. In recent
times, anywhere infidelity on the part of men is
mentioned, you hear women go “ Na so them be ”
or “ Men are meant to cheat” or “it’s in their DNA”
or “If your man doesn’t cheat, then he’s not a
man” . The same women will still come and be
crying up and down and acting all suicidal when
they catch their men in the act; what are the tears
for biko


Women have succeeded in making men some sort
of untouchable lot that should get away with
anything when it comes to infidelity (Go out there
and cheat kinda situation). Biko where is it stated
in your bible that men are meant to cheat? (sha
don’t quote old testament for me except you are in
2014 BC) or has a gene that codes for infidelity
been discovered Why have we come to accept
men as cheats?


The fact that we have come to the “All men should
be cheats” conclusion has over time fueled their
tendency to become cheats and as such almost
ruined any chances of infidelity phasing out of
relationships/marriages and having an infidelity
free generation . We need an ideology shift!!!!!