A family friend of mine divorced her husband a very long time ago. She has lovely daughters from her first marriage. Having observed her loneliness for a while, I advised her to remarry. She gave me a straight-forward answer, “I can’t let a man I call my husband be sleeping with my daughters or his sons, if he has, doing the same”. She is trying to prevent incest.

WHAT IS INCEST?
Sex between close relatives: sexual activity between two people who are considered, for moral or genetic reasons, too closely related to have such a relationship. Incest is regarded as a serious taboo in almost every society, although cultures differ as to the extent to which marriages are allowed between relatives. (Encarta Dictionaries)

CATEGORIES OF INCEST
These include incest between blood relatives (consanguinal incest); relatives by adoption or marriage (affinal incest), and quasi-relatives (for example, a live-in partner/lover or foster parent).
Sexual relations between the most closely related blood relatives, that is, within the nuclear family (between parent and child and between siblings), are the most forbidden because they have the most serious potential for harm and destruction. Parent-child incest, which in most cases means father- or stepfather-daughter involvement, is consistently reported as the most damaging type of incest, followed by sibling incest perpetrated by brothers
Cross-Generational Incest:

Cross-generational incest involves sexual contact with a considerably older partner who is a step-parent, in-law, grandparent, aunt, uncle, or second cousin. It may also involve a quasi-relative who plays a parental or guardian role in the child's life and from whom the child should be able to expect sexual distance.

Peer Incest:
Peer incest involves sexual contact between individuals who are close in age. Most sibling (including step- and half-sibling) and cousin incest falls within this category, although when a large age difference exists between participants, cross-generational incest may be the more appropriate category.

Opposite-sex and same-sex Incest:
Research suggests that same-sex incest, whether it involves males or females (although same-sex incest seems to involve boys more than girls), is vastly under reported and under investigated because its occurrence involves breaking two taboos, incest and homosexuality. It is, of course, confusing and traumatising for the victim and often causes a questioning of his or her own sexual orientation.

FAMILY DYNAMICS AND INCEST
There appears to be two main family types in which incest occurs most regularly: the dysfunctional family and the superficially "normal" family. The dysfunctional family is characterised by problems spanning generations, relatively low socio-economic standing, marginal functioning of individual family members, and the family as a whole (for example, drug or alcohol abuse). In this family, it is not unusual for several family members to be sexually involved with one another, for pregnancies to result, and for the resulting children to be raised in the family.
Children in dysfunctional families are basically left to raise themselves, and without adult supervision, are vulnerable to all forms of abuse inside and outside of the family. While some become caretakers, others become rebels.
The superficially normal family appears to be solid and well-functioning. The parents have usually been in a long-term marriage. They are socially and financially stable, and seem well-respected by the community. Typically the family follows the traditional model of the husband as "head of the household" and the wife as subordinate. This is everyone’s dream family.
The family, however, is not as stable internally as it appears to be on the surface. The parents often lack the emotional capacity to adequately nurture one another, much less their children. As a result, both are emotionally needy and impoverished, perhaps due to the abusive upbringing of one or both parents. Over time the parents become estranged from one another, not only emotionally but also sexually. Sometimes they develop work schedules that allow them to avoid interacting with one another on much more than a superficial level. Alcoholism or other problems are often evident and contribute to the barren emotional family climate. The mother turns to her daughter for help in running the household, and the father turns to his daughter for emotional and sexual sustenance. Children, then, often turn to one another to meet their own emotional or other needs, and sometimes the relationship becomes sexual.
As a family, be it ‘the happy’ family or the chaotic family; intact homes or disintegrating homes, divorced or widowed, we have a responsibility to be very observant. For those who have remarried or planning to remarry, you need to be extra careful especially if you have children vulnerable around because data have shown that incest largely occurs in step-parents-step-child relationship.
"Denying that such acts occur among Nigerians is counterproductive. We need to recognise that educational attainment, ethnicity, geographical location or social class does not limit incest. Look around you. That withdrawn child in your Sunday school class or mosque might be a victim of child sexual abuse. That promiscuous girl on your street may be an incest survivor. That nice woman (or man) in your office may be a perpetrator". Dr Osundeko

SIGNS OF INCEST
Behavioural change/emotional swings
Fear
Obsession with a particular family member
Unusual anger
There are so many signs to watch out for but the most important is the first one I mentioned.

HOW TO PREVENT INCEST
For the ‘regular’ family:
Avoid room ‘over population’
Monitor ‘cousins’ living in your house
Sex education
Fill your home with love

For those remarrying:
Do a background check on your partner
Pay surprise visits to your house
Watch out for excessive gifts towards your children (that maybe a consolation prize from the affair)
Talk to your children. Gain full trust.
Be on top of your game.

Thanks for reading.

Thanks op for sharing. this will open a lot of parents' eyes and save a lot of children.

Front page worthy

No worries!
I gat FOUR different kinds of SECURITY systems ALL OVER MY HOME! Motion sensors EVERYWHERE! Monitored from my phone 24/7! Straight to 911! I don’t allow people/Nigerian relatives in my home. Social distancing and isolation is my specialty!

The children are well educated about such occurrences too. The rest. . . Na protection from higher powers! I “done did” my part!


No need for too much talk, I dey watch like HAWK!