i dont even know how to explain it but i feel really bad.For some time now,i've been enduring what my father does but it has gotten to a point that i've been pushed to the wallThishas really opened my eyes and has made me think about why he treats me this way.i've come up with some reasons.Put youself in my father's shoes and see if he is justified to treat me this way.                                                                                                  Firstly,we go to cele and since I was about 11 they said i was a witch.To get the evil spirit out,you will kneel down btw 3 elders and they will beat u with palmfronds for lets say 20 minutes(usually they sing 3 songs while they dust the evil spirit from your body.) Just so u know,the lady who gave the 'message' is my stepmothers friend.they did the work for me for three days.It happened to be during the children's harvest so people were much @ church.Imagine the embarassment,not to even say the  small bruises i got. @ skull when my teacher asked i had to tell him that we did night vigil and I slept on the floor so ants bit me thats why my face was like that. Not long after that my step mother went to her village and came back about two weeks after,next thing i know,she gets pregnat,about six months into the pregnancy she and my father fought.she moved to church and she was staying there.after she gave birth,my father did not let her come back,thats when she started getting friendly with me.she told me that when she went home it was because she got pregnant and she lost the baby.that's when i started thinking and i realised that there was a day i was at church and I was talking to the assistant pastor and he said something like i should leave the way so that my step mother would have her child.thats when i figured that she must have been trying to get pregnant and maybe she could not so she must have told her prophetess friend who said they should do the work for me.all the while i was a simple 11 year old girl who bore no ill will to anybody.i was even happy to have a step mother to be with my dad and take care of us.   later on it was back to my dad preparing the meals and such.That work started coming again that i was a witch,this time,iwas 13 and the work was different,they took u 2 a bush,with a stool and 3 brooms.to cut the long story short they will sing 3 songs while they were beating u with this broom.                                                                                                                                            at 16 they did it for me again,not even up to a year later,i got the message again.              now im i supposed to see myself as a witch especially when i dont even think bad of people.my father used to work in an oil company but he resigned because they sold the company and he was reaching retirement age.the second to the last time they gave me this 'work',they said it was me and my mother's fault that my father's retirement plans werent going according to plan.they said my mother is a withch too and she has infected me.i finished secondary sch 2 yrs ago.if my father had the money he would send me to a private university but because he spent all his retirement money on a businesss that failed woefully and now we barely get money to buy foodstuffs.its a challenge to tell him meat or chicken or what ever has finished in the hse he'll accuse me of wasting it.    as it is,the stew finished and i was hoping his girlfriend would help me tell him that stew has finished in the hse when my sister(the child of tthe other woman) told my dad.he called me and he was like why ddint i tell him.i said i did not know how to and he said "i may think im doing him but im doing myself".i went downstairs and i started thinking, what could i have done to make my father say that i think im doing him? has it got that bad.does he really believe i have evil powers and i will hurt him with them? what will i gain? now there is no money,my mates will be finishing school in two or three yeasrs time.i just got admission and it does'nt look like he has money to pay for my school fees.  if he thinks im evil then he is justified with the way he treats me.but something makes me wonder,this is my father,iv been living with him for 14years,he ought to know me.why would he believe i am a witch when i hardly fall sick,i follow him to church,even after what my other step moter put me through i still try not to treat her child badly.my mother doesnt stay with us ,my parents where divorced even b4 i was born.(when i was still in the womb).4 years after I was born.this man comes and says the church said that our mother was trying to kill us(me and my brother) and that he should take us away from her.thats how i started living with daddy.b4 then i never even knew i had a father.the so called witch(my mother)is re married and has moved on.  my brother is sort of indifferent to me. this whole situation will make me do something very bad.then we'll see who the witch is.

the psychological trauma is enough. if i were you, i will run away maybe to Lagos where they will never see me. you have suffered so much.

study hard so that you can pass well and get into the Uni that way you get away from them.

all this naija lie lie church sef. cele is a lie lie church where their pastors or wayo prophet get drunk, speak drunkenly and they say it is speaking in tongues. . .ummm

you are in God's shadow. all is well with you.

why did you end your narration with "grins"?
what about your mum?dont you have any distant relative that can accommodate you till you find your feet?
Dont just run away with no destination,its a bigger and worse world out there,look for a relative or family friend that wud accommodate you.
BTW what do you mean by " this whole situation will make me do something very bad.then we'll see who the witch is."
Are you saying you are diabolical
Get closer to God too and Goodluck.

tRoOE:

Well can't you live with your mother for the main time

not a bad idea

Your story sounds a like something from,

Merry Xmas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thanks u guyz.really its not the church or my dad that is to blame.i really put the blame on those pple who let the devil posses them like my stepmom,her prophetess friend,the pastors(shephards) who tell my dad what he wants to hear and not the truth.posting this thing has really helped me let off some steam.i believe everything will be okay if i stick with GOD.im sure that as long as i dont decide to take revenge for myself,GOD will definitly judge the whole issue.THANKS GUYZ,THANKS NAIRALAND&THANKS GOD.MERRY CHRISTMAS

joyAA:

thanks u guys.really its not the church or my dad that is to blame.i really put the blame on those people who let the devil posses them like my stepmom,her prophetess friend,the pastors(shephards) who tell my dad what he wants to hear and not the truth.posting this thing has really helped me let off some steam.i believe everything will be okay if i stick with GOD.I'm sure that as long as i don't decide to take revenge for myself,GOD will definitly judge the whole issue.THANKS guys,THANKS NAIRALAND&THANKS GOD.MERRY CHRISTMAS

u seem to be a little bit confused , the people your blaming are they not form your church? the so called "sherpherd" etc u seem to have a good idea of the right path, but u can only succede on that path if ur head is clear and not in ur confused state.

getting closer to God is the only way out for u(rule out revenge, u'll hurt ur self further)
and get to know God personnally(definitly not thru ur church, if possible change church if not seek him thru ur personal prayers and bible reading).

if you can move in with ur mum or other relatives u'll definitly be better off,cos ur links with negativity will never enable u prosper or move farwad.
lastly as u seek God shine ya eyes well well (He takes no delight in fools) aka confused peps

Well spoken!

sad sad sad.

Start planning your way out. It might be difficult but when you leave just leave for good. I feel sad for you but just be strong until there is a way out.

this is really sad,especially the potential long term effects on her self esteem
@poster
dont let it get you down or overwhelm you as you v survived it for this long and it can only get better as its gotten this worse,planning ahead like others have said is the key and making sure you get stuck in to whatever you r doing at the moment presumably education, you ll look back and dismiss it all many years from now as i have experienced same thing before as well,but i was actually bad

CCC
My dear u have heard enough advice from fellow nairalanders, pray hard for God to direct u to a bible believing church, I wonder how long it will take CCC to deliver a witchcraft spirit away from some1 they claimed she is a witch. Or are u stronger than them than them lolllllllllssss The truth is that, they liars, feltish and powerless, they are not doing what the bible instructed them to do so therefore find ur way to a place where u will have the fullness and divine spirit of God. may God continue to strenghten u.

@poster,
There is a time in our life when things must go wrong. You sounded like a good fellow because their is no bitterness in your post. That, in itself, show that you can live with it.

The problem with people that consult divinity either from churches or shrine is that, they believes that all their problems are caused by enemies. I can see that someone had set a precedence and everyone had to see you as the architech of their problems. That is Africa for you.

Wait, could they be telling the truth? Perhaps you have unusual gift that you didn't notice. Can you tell us if you have notice any such behavior? Strange dreams at a strange places? Or dreams that come to pass?

I asked the questions for a purpose. I shall use your answer to see if I can think of something.

Cheer!

olanajim:

@poster,
There is a time in our life when things must go wrong. You sounded like a good fellow because their is no bitterness in your post. That, in itself, show that you can live with it.

The problem with people that consult divinity either from churches or shrine is that, they believes that all their problems are caused by enemies. I can see that someone had set a precedence and everyone had to see you as the architech of their problems. That is Africa for you.

Wait, could they be telling the truth? Perhaps you have unusual gift that you didn't notice. Can you tell us if you have notice any such behavior? Strange dreams at a strange places? Or dreams that come to pass?

I asked the questions for a purpose. I shall use your answer to see if I can think of something.

Cheer!

.they definitely r not telling the truth,they blamed me 4 my fathers failed business,my step mothers miscarriage and others,all of which i was not even aware of their happening(especially my step moms pregnancy.when things got though financially thats when i knew my fathers business was not going well) if at all i have powers,it a premonition kind of thing,which has saved me from falling hard.For example,knowing the kind of soft person i am i ought to have been crazy by now,but somehow,all those while i always knew what they were saying of me i was just never sure because till this day,my father and ex stepmom never said it to my face,and so i prepared myself for the worst.I cannot stay with my mom because our dad does not even let us see her.we r not allowed to take anything from her,because they said in church that she is trying to kill us.As for relatives,my fathers family is a hot bed of family feuds,so bad that i have seen only one,out of four of my fathers survivig siblings.,My uncle who is aware of what is going on but tries his best to avoid us altogether,though he stays with us he goes back 2 UK to his family occasionally.my mother remarried 5 yrs ago,she'll be 50 next yr,her husband's people refuse 2 totally accept her as a wife because she does not want 2 give her husband a child. she says she is too old for the rigours of child birth.she is still struggling with that,u can imagine if she brings me to staying with her,the family will say she has brought her children to take over thier brothers inheritance.Their brother being the only one to have made it in the family,so i dont really have a choice here.

Joy,

It is possible that some people your father offended are behind his travails. It is also possible that it might be due to his own carelessness. From your story, he had married at least 3 times. And didn't get on well with his own sibblings talkless of his wives. Maybe that is what occationed his consistent broken marriage. Maybe evil men are truly at work.

You have choices to make. Do you want to end up as a nobody living in that shadow until you are unable to proceed on your education?

Do you enjoy being labelled a witch? Mark you, it may affect your own future relationship too. Especially if your future husband start believing the lies.

There is this saying that IF YOU REPEAT A LIE TOO OFTEN, IT WILL BECOME A TRUTH.

I suggest that you secretly establish relationship with your dad sibling, especially anyone that is sympathetic to your cause. You will then state your facts. As the two of you get familiar, you must ensure that you make your study and career your priority. Work hard. Then, seek assistance of your distance relative and proceed on study far, far from your home! If you can travel out, it is great. Just stay away from your dad once you are in school and bury yourself in works. I am sure they will find another witch once you are out of sight. That is long term solution, in my own view.

On the interim, remain good to your dad and everyone. Stay out of trouble. Pray alot. Don't hate your dad. Don't do things that may lead to your being branded a witch.

Most important, you have got to talk to your dad!

How? First endear yourself to him and let him see how good you are. Second, find a time he is relax and see if you can talk to him. This is a critical part and it depend on the kind of father you have. If he is a stubborn one, it will be tough.

What should you tell him?

1. Just ask him why his sibblings don't visit you. Let him tell you what went wrong at least for d sake of posterity. Listen to him.
2. Ask him whether he truly believe you are a

@ Olanajim your advice sounds very good,Joy i hope this can help u a liitle ,good luck

olanajim:

Joy,

It is possible that some people your father offended are behind his travails. It is also possible that it might be due to his own carelessness. From your story, he had married at least 3 times. And didn't get on well with his own sibblings talkless of his wives. Maybe that is what occationed his consistent broken marriage. Maybe evil men are truly at work.

You have choices to make. Do you want to end up as a nobody living in that shadow until you are unable to proceed on your education?

Do you enjoy being labelled a witch? Mark you, it may affect your own future relationship too. Especially if your future husband start believing the lies.

There is this saying that IF YOU REPEAT A LIE TOO OFTEN, IT WILL BECOME A TRUTH.

I suggest that you secretly establish relationship with your dad sibling, especially anyone that is sympathetic to your cause. You will then state your facts. As the two of you get familiar, you must ensure that you make your study and career your priority. Work hard. Then, seek assistance of your distance relative and proceed on study far, far from your home! If you can travel out, it is great. Just stay away from your dad once you are in school and bury yourself in works. I am sure they will find another witch once you are out of sight. That is long term solution, in my own view.

On the interim, remain good to your dad and everyone. Stay out of trouble. Pray alot. Don't hate your dad. Don't do things that may lead to your being branded a witch.

Most important, you have got to talk to your dad!

How? First endear yourself to him and let him see how good you are. Second, find a time he is relax and see if you can talk to him. This is a critical part and it depend on the kind of father you have. If he is a stubborn one, it will be tough.

What should you tell him?

1. Just ask him why his sibblings don't visit you. Let him tell you what went wrong at least for d sake of posterity. Listen to him.
2. Ask him whether he truly believe you are a

I wanted to cry.You're so brave. After all you've gone through you're not at all bitter. You've got the right stuff. Well,you know Africa and the occult. People want to blame other people for their failures. It's easier than facing the fact that they're responsible for their own problems.

Your situation is horrible. Your father has relinquished control of his life to his church. They have to deliver what he wants and you're the unlucky scapegoat. I agree with those who say you need a different environment, before this permanently mars you psychologically. I shudder to think of the damage it's already done, and how very very hurt you must feel. I urge you to look for your mother. Since she was a victim of the same church she should be able to sympathise. And she is your mother, no way is she going to be 'indifferent' to you. Perhaps you just assume she is. Please find her and convince her to let you live with her. You really need a friend and at your age can be your mother's friend. She doesn't think you're a witch, and being around normal people who don't see the devil when they see you might help heal some of the pain your father's inflicted on you,and restore your sense of worth. I love that you don't hate your father. You're so strong.

#sigh... It really was a difficult time, but I'm glad I'm in a better place atm. I graduated from uni, currently rounding off service, uni was sponsored entirely by mom, thank God for her!
Stuff got worse for my Dad- I can't even begin to say how bad, but I know all will be well...after all, he's still my dad, wish I could do more than I'm doing for him and mom.
I've dealt with all the confusion, hatred depression, sadness, low self esteem and all, I'm a better person.
#betternotbitter
#thebestrevengeissuccess
Thank you all for the advice

joyAA:
#sigh... It really was a difficult time, but I'm glad I'm in a better place atm. I graduated from uni, currently rounding off service, uni was sponsored entirely by mom, thank God for her!
Stuff got worse for my Dad- I can't even begin to say how bad, but I know all will be well...after all, he's still my dad, wish I could do more than I'm doing for him and mom.
I've dealt with all the confusion, hatred depression, sadness, low self esteem and all, I'm a better person.
#betternotbitter
#thebestrevengeissuccess
Thank you all for the advice

Wow, Congrats dear . . . very happy for you.

You are lucky to have both parents care deeply for you, most children from broken homes are not that lucky. Keep praying for your father, God will surely restore him.

Good luck.

joyAA:
#sigh... It really was a difficult time, but I'm glad I'm in a better place atm. I graduated from uni, currently rounding off service, uni was sponsored entirely by mom, thank God for her!
Stuff got worse for my Dad- I can't even begin to say how bad, but I know all will be well...after all, he's still my dad, wish I could do more than I'm doing for him and mom.
I've dealt with all the confusion, hatred depression, sadness, low self esteem and all, I'm a better person.
#betternotbitter
#thebestrevengeissuccess
Thank you all for the advice

I just saw your thread and I celebrate with you that you have pulled through.
I'm happy you're not bitter or full of revenge.You can b e on your own and not have to deal with all those confused cele church people and your stepmother.
Take care of your parents(forgive them,they were ignorant).

Most importantly,please take your time before rushing to marry.Lay a very good foundation first.Get to know the guy well.

Wowww....
Congrats... Happy for you.

It's like seven years since you first posted your story.

Life is a process.

Little by little, one goes far..

Wow , your story made me cry sincerely but thank you survived .





Congrat dear.

I feel u very well cos i went thru similar stuff not that they labelled me a witch but my step mom and her older children was hell bent on making my life hell when momsy left...it was all good one big happy family until i was in my senior years in sec school like ss1 For no reason this woman started hating on me & my younger ones,i could no longer play with my step brothers anymore cos she was steady poisoning their minds against me & my younger ones that i am possessed by a demonic force which controls me and influences me to bring ill luck to ppl..but me stubborn sha if u give me one i give u ten.My dad was d only one i respected and they did all they could to separate me and him and all thru he played neutral which i hated alot cos i wanted him to be on my side..a lot of ill sh!t that i experienced & some spiritual attacks that i cannot mention here(real life)...i was just a kid whose mom was thrown out by his dad while he was 8-9 yrs old and the ppl i was closed to became far from me even tho we stayed in same house..only d younger ones who were my mates didn't change their attitude completely & i got sympathy from my uncles/aunties who knew what was going on.Even her own ppl some where totally against her ..I remember seeing someone point accusing fingers @ me during every major exams i had and one thing would always make my results useless if its not seized/cancelled.I had to look for means to get in touch with momsy on a permanent level although she used to come see us once in a while.It was then i had my bible and learned how to pray i began to overcome bit by bit i got into the uni and that same being came again but this time i saw it/him breaking in pieces like glass being shattered immediately it started the bloody routine and that was the end of that chapter.It got to the point that she would even make sure to look for a way to drive any house help that came working:then no house help lasted more than a month.I remember coming home every holiday like asking my dad's driver or the gate man una madam don bring another one come again? and we would joke abt it.They however finally succeeded in breaking me and popsy when in my final yr-grad period..in short i did it myself nobody..I got involved with d wrong crowd on my first yr in school,tot i would find solace there but found hell and i had no choice(so i tot @ the time) but to embrace the devil and when sh!t hit d fan in my finals i was called to face the school senate of the student affairs division as i was this close to rustication..i even hid from popsy bt hd to let him knw one way or the other...was lucky to clear my names off and get my certs and here i am finally free and u know the crazy thing these same ppl who hurt u will still expect ur love when they r old..i saw her this yr when i went to see my dad n she was forming the loving mother she never was..its hard growing up in a polygamous/broken home theres hardly ever love to go around but what can we do if they now start showing us love? i guess we show them back and everyone dies happy after wasting and delaying someones life...well lemme get back to my hustle make junior no go ask me question tomorrow say where i dey when my mates dey hustle money

thorpido:
I just saw your thread and I celebrate with you that you have pulled through.
I'm happy you're not bitter or full of revenge.You can b e on your own and not have to deal with all those confused cele church people and your stepmother.
Take care of your parents(forgive them,they were ignorant).

Most importantly,please take your time before rushing to marry.Lay a very good foundation first.Get to know the guy well.

Yea, I'm trying to take care of them the best way I can, and it's been all good.
The updated story excludes a lot of frustration and disappointment but in all, I'm not where I used to be, and I know I'm headed somewhere great. Thanks

joyAA:


Yea, I'm trying to take care of them the best way I can, and it's been all good.
The updated story excludes a lot of frustration and disappointment but in all, I'm not where I used to be, and I know I'm headed somewhere great. Thanks

Yea,I know there would have been a lot of frustrations but things are definitely better than before.Keep your head up.

As I'm not the type that post on nairaland except for some reasons, your thread is something out of this world!
With all the problems you faced as a child and after seven years of your initial post you are still existing and far better?! all I can say is...WOW!
You are far younger than I am but you inspire me.
I thank God for your life and I pray you grow better still.
God bless You.


PS: Stay away from pastors and prophets, read the bible, pray and praise God at all times and if you need to go to church, go to ones that are about worship and praises and cross-check sermons at all times so that they would not lead you astray.

I don't just get how flogging someone with a broom and singing could do anything...I hope people has stopped such thing because it is just sick...

OP, ur dad doesn't hate u or think u were evil....
U were not used to seeing a frustrated person that's why u were so concern...

Your dad was comfortable before, working and getting paid... The joy of every normal dad will be to provide for his family... The situation was not the case any more...

Sometime he will remember how buoyant he was before and how his present situation is.. it angers him... he might not be happy that he cannot provide for his children's education and other things as he should... that's it.. not that he thought u were evil...

Thank god for you dear op.may His name be praised for ever over the victory ,so so happy for you, not many got it this way o.dont. Like talking about polygamy,if I do, this whole section might not be able to do justice to my write ups,let's just thank god for you, it's you page and am gonna restrict it to that,once again thank God for u.

Ujoan:


Wow, Congrats dear . . . very happy for you.

You are lucky to have both parents care deeply for you, most children from broken homes are not that lucky. Keep praying for your father, God will surely restore him.

Good luck.

Thanks!
Most times, it's the kids that suffer the most in a broken home, some more than others, I'm just grateful to God for bringing me thus far.