Forgiveness

Assuming you were falsely accused by someone for a heinous crime and got a 50 to life sentence. After serving 10 years for that crime, it was determined by science that you are innocent. Being a born again christian, you are required by God to forgive and forget. Do you think you can forgive the person that accused you falsely and made you lose 10 yrs of your short life in solitary confinement with no strings attached?.

What if the person killed a loved member of your family[mother, father, siblings etc]. Do you trust yourself that you can walk up to him, preach the gospel of Jesus Christ to him and walk away without at least abusing him?.

How strong is your christian/muslim faith and do you think you can practice what you preach in these dire circumstances?

The same Iwo Funmi who promised to arm youself to the teeth and fight the Muslim northern folks? How do you now preach forgiveness? Are you just saying it or you are for real?

I beg woman, Practice forgiveness, if you are preaching it here.

Tee hee hee

i guess i should, but i seriously doubt that i can. at least, not with my present state of mind. the best i can do is try to erase him from my memory and avoid meeting him

The same Iwo Funmi who promised to arm youself to the teeth and fight the Muslim northern folks? How do you now preach forgiveness? Are you just saying it or you are for real?

I beg woman, Practice forgiveness, if you are preaching it here.

Olodo; Did you read the questions at all?. Where did I say i practice fervently what i preach or that I am holy?. It's only fellow olodos like you that will laugh loud and fart uncontrollably because comprehension is an integral part of the problem from where they emanate. The only language they understand is massacre.

Forgive what?. We say it in the lords prayer everyday but when faced with a situation like that, your emotions will surely becloud your religious belief. How do you start forgiving someone that raped and killed your sister or mother?.

olabowale:

The same Iwo Funmi who promised to arm youself to the teeth and fight the Muslim northern folks? How do you now preach forgiveness? Are you just saying it or you are for real?

I beg woman, Practice forgiveness, if you are preaching it here.

olabs can't you let my aunty have her peace? enjoy this

The power of forgiveness
by Mary Southerland

Printer version




Sometimes the hardest thing to say is "I'm sorry," to admit that we have hurt someone. The only thing that can be harder is to forgive those who have hurt us. Most of us are familiar with the love chapter of the Bible, 1 Corinthians 13, where Paul defines true love:

Love is patient.
Love is kind.
Love does not envy.
Love is not easily angered.
Love keeps no record of wrongs.
The reality is that we all need forgiveness, and we all must learn to forgive.

I grew up in a small Texas town that we moved to the day after my father's funeral. We were poor, living in what some would call a "shack" on the edge of town. My amazing mother worked three jobs to support three children as well as my grandmother who lived with us. Her main job was working as a nurse in the hospital nursery where she took care of newborns.

As a child, I was frequently sick with colds, ear infections, and the flu. It seemed as if I was at the doctor's office almost every week during the winter. We had no insurance and very little money, but we did have a family doctor who was a friend and colleague of my mother's. In fact, they worked side-by-side each day at the one and only hospital in town. Knowing our financial circumstances, this doctor and his wife often asked my mom to babysit to earn extra money. Since they had five children, I was often recruited to go with her as a backup.

Over the years, this doctor often took care of our medical needs, charging us nothing. Little did I know the high price that I would have to pay. This doctor was my friend, a man I respected, and a man I trusted – until the day he molested me in his office. The hurt, pain, and betrayal were so great that I locked it away in some dark corner of my soul, refusing to admit it had ever happened. I told no one.

Uncovering the wounds

Fast forward 20 years when I was happily married to Dan Southerland, a pastor and my best friend, and had two wonderful children. Our church was exploding in growth. I had started traveling and speaking for women's conferences and retreats, and loved it! Everything on the outside looked great, successful, and very right – but inside the past slowly ate away at my very being until one day, my world collapsed and I sank into a pit of clinical depression. I was paralyzed emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually. The simple tasks seemed like impossible mountains to climb. Panic attacks became a daily event. I stepped out of ministry and out of life as I had known it.

I began to uncover the wounds I had so desperately tried to ignore most of my life. Instead of dealing with those wounds, I kept insanely busy in a vain attempt to earn God's favor and the approval of others. My worth seemed to rest on the foundation of doing, instead of being. I soon discovered that one of the main reasons I had fallen into that pit was because I refused to face and deal with the pain of my past, but with the help of a loving husband, a Christian psychiatrist, and a brilliant family doctor, I began to make slow but steady progress in climbing out of that dark, slimy pit. Then, I remembered.

I remembered that day in the doctor's office. I remembered it all, and when that awful memory slammed into my life, I fell apart. I hated that man. I wanted him to pay for what he had done to me. I wanted him to hurt like I had been hurt. I also knew that somehow I had to let go of my pain and forgive him or I would be trapped for the rest of my life. God and I began to work through every painful, horrifying moment of that memory.

Months passed, and the day came when Dan asked me to speak at all five worship services of our church. When I asked him what the topic was, he smiled and simply said, "Forgiveness." I knew what God was up to, and being the mature and godly woman that I was, I became furious with Him. "That man does not deserve forgiveness, Lord" I ranted.

My Father whispered, "Neither do you, child." But I was still angry. "Lord, he is the one that hurt me," I cried. "I think it is only fair for me to wait for him to make the first move. And then he needs to come crawling on his hands and knees, begging for my forgiveness!"

The choice to forgive

In the silence, I heard the words of the Great Physician, a voice I have come to love so much, "Aren't you glad I didn't wait for you to come to me?" I suddenly realized I had a choice to make. I could hang on to my anger and bitterness, making that evil man my jailer, or I could choose to forgive him and set myself free!

But I just couldn't forgive him on my own, so I did what David did. I cried out to God.

Psalm 40:1-3a (NIV) says, "I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit; out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God."

As I wrestled with the choice to forgive, I learned several life-changing truths:
If we make the choice to forgive, God will supply the forgiveness.
There should be no limit to our forgiveness because there is no limit to His.
Forgiveness is not a feeling or an emotion. Forgiveness is a deliberate choice.
Forgiveness is our greatest need, and God's greatest gift.
For some reason, the holidays seem to intensify old wounds, resurrect old hurts, and magnify old longings. We must deal with old pain before we can truly live today and tomorrow. While we cannot change the past, we can change our response to the past and dictate the power it has over us.

If our greatest need had been information, God would have sent an educator. If our greatest need had been technology, God would have sent a scientist. But because our greatest need is forgiveness, God sent a Savior, Jesus Christ, who is calling us all to a higher place, a place of forgiveness. The choice is ours to make. Today, we can choose freedom by choosing to forgive.




Mary Southerland is the Stress-Buster, helping women manage stress and experience joy in their daily lives. A former women's ministry director, Mary works in the trenches with pastors' wives and ministry leaders. She also encourages and motivates thousands of women through her speaking ministry, her online Bible study, Light for the Journey, and as a member and co-founder of Girlfriends in God.

Mary provides a variety of CDs, MP3 downloads, and a new, e-Book Bible Study, God's Answer to Stress, that can be used for personal or small group teaching. Her books include: Hope in the Midst of Depression, Sandpaper People, Escaping the Stress Trap, and Experiencing God's Power in Your Ministry . She also writes for Crosswalk.com and is a frequent radio and TV guest. Mary is director of women's ministry at Westside Family Church in Lenexa, Kansas, where her husband is the lead teaching pastor.

@earTHMama: « #4 on: Today at 01:36:35 AM »

Olodo; Did you read the questions at all?. Where did I say i practice fervently what i preach or that I am holy?. It's only fellow olodos like you that will laugh loud and fart uncontrollably because comprehension is an integral part of the problem from where they emanate. The only language they understand is massacre.

Where did I go wrong? First the header gave the content away. If you an atheist or something like that, I may read it to be sure that you are not posing your entry only as a rhetoric to those who say they belief.

But you, Funmi say that you are a christian. The last I check, all christians say that they are trying to be Christlike. And they claim that the Biblical Christ was the most forgiven. Now, Funmilay, aburo, NeoWoman, Dominatrix and Mistress Funmilayo, HotFunmi, RedHotChic, lol (some sick "Chick" may think that i am coming on to you. Te truth is Noooooo), arent you trying to emulate Jesus? Considering that you are not married yet. At least thats what you said. Jesus did not marry. So you emulated him in that quarter. Thats a bad place for you to emulate him. Rather you should on the subject of "Forgiveness!"

Afterall, you started it. And it is the season. Thats what you claim. Even though history shows its mre like Spring time! Thats my parable. I hope people with keen eyes can see where i am leading our "Whip in hand" woman. lol.

So Funmi, Iwo gon ni Olodo. In this case Olodo rabata because you brought about something you will not even do, while you are expected to be the first to do it.

@JJYOU: Aunty e, is not serious. I am trying to teach her something. Truth.

.

But you, Funmi say that you are a christian. The last I check, all christians say that they are trying to be Christlike. And they claim that the Biblical Christ was the most forgiven. Now, Funmilay, aburo, NeoWoman, Dominatrix and Mistress Funmilayo, HotFunmi, RedHotChic, lol (some sick "Chick" may think that i am coming on to you. Te truth is Noooooo), arent you trying to emulate Jesus? Considering that you are not married yet. At least thats what you said. Jesus did not marry. So you emulated him in that quarter. Thats a bad place for you to emulate him. Rather you should on the subject of "Forgiveness!"

You are overly interested in my private life. That is one proof that you are targeting to see my pant but it aint gonna happen even in jupiter. You were the person that emulate s Mohammed by marrying multiple wives. Which other ways are you trying to emulate in his life apart from amassing women for your old tired butt.

Afterall, you started it. And it is the season. Thats what you claim. Even though history shows its mre like Spring time! Thats my parable. I hope people with keen eyes can see where i am leading our "Whip in hand" woman. lol.

So Funmi, Iwo gon ni Olodo. In this case Olodo rabata because you brought about something you will not even do, while you are expected to be the first to do it.

@JJYOU: Aunty e, is not serious. I am trying to teach her something. Truth.

I am not the quintessential christian either way you look at it but i try everyday to live like one. Forgiveness is one big doctrine that haunts christianity and that is why muslims have been massacring them in Nigeria and middle east.

@earTHMama: « #8 on: Today at 06:07:33 PM »

You are overly interested in my private life. That is one proof that you are targeting to see my pant but it aint going to happen even in jupiter. You were the person that emulate s Mohammed by marrying multiple wives. Which other ways are you trying to emulate in his life apart from amassing women for your old tired butt.

Noooooooooooooooo! I already have my choices in women. You are like a nice that I do not have. I am old, compared to you. But not tiring about me. I have no need for anything from you. We are all humans. Thats is the commonality.

Why is it that a simple conversation is amounting to "interest?" Noooo. again sis. And to the many wives; I can only go up to four. Mine is complete. lol. Emulating Muhammad (AS) in forgiveness and in simple and pure acts of kindness. Oh; in worship, too.

How do you emulate Jesus in worship, Funmilayo? lol.


[Quote]
I am not the quintessential christian either way you look at it but i try everyday to live like one. Forgiveness is one big doctrine that haunts christianity and that is why muslims have been massacring them in Nigeria and middle east.
[/quote]

You forgot the Christians and Jews and others lived their best lives under the Muslims; in Europe's andalusia, etc, under the last Othoman empire in Turkey. And the Muslims did not kill off the Hindus and the Sikhs of India, either. And I, Olabowale, a Yoruba Muslims never have hurt a Christians, even though Ijebu Ode is a Muslim city. And no one can deny that. Yes, I did not lived there. But both Ibadan and Lagos are authentic Muslim cities too.

Aburo, your argument falls flat.

Noooooooooooooooo! I already have my choices in women. You are like a nice that I do not have. I am old, compared to you. But not tiring about me. I have no need for anything from you. We are all humans. Thats is the commonality.

Why is it that a simple conversation is amounting to "interest?" Noooo. again sis. And to the many wives; I can only go up to four. Mine is complete.

You don't sound like you are satisfied with what you have at home. Are you hungry for more sugar honey?. Don't get diabetes because you can't get enough sugar from women.

lol. Emulating Muhammad (AS) in forgiveness and in simple and pure acts of kindness. Oh; in worship, too.

How do you emulate Jesus in worship, Funmilayo? lol.

By their fruits, we shall know them. Unless you are about to prove here that womanizing is great because that is the only emulation of mohammed i have seen in you.

You forgot the Christians and Jews and others lived their best lives under the Muslims; in Europe's andalusia, etc, under the last Othoman empire in Turkey. And the Muslims did not kill off the Hindus and the Sikhs of India, either. And I, Olabowale, a Yoruba Muslims never have hurt a Christians, even though Ijebu Ode is a Muslim city. And no one can deny that. Yes, I did not lived there.

Why are you guys massacring christians then in Nigeria over a simple doughnut?

But both Ibadan and Lagos are authentic Muslim cities too.

No, Lagos is not. Lagos is an authentic Christendom. Ibadan can be 50/50.

@earTHMama: « #10 on: Today at 01:20:57 AM »

You don't sound like you are satisfied with what you have at home. Are you hungry for more sugar honey?. Don't get diabetes because you can't get enough sugar from women.

Aburo, enu e pooju! Lol. I am very satisfied with my women. There is no desire for sugar or honey, especially from you!



[Quote]
By their fruits, we shall know them. Unless you are about to prove here that womanizing is great because that is the only emulation of mohammed i have seen in you.
[/quote]

I am almost sure there is no man in Orile kingdom, where you have your blood in Yorubaland, with a single wife, except that everyman has more than one wife! Listen, I am entitled to up to 4! I have the appetite and all the acutrements for my taste. I like prime ribs, yet I love rough meat, while I will not neglect chicken, and fish is also in my alley.

I emulate Muhammad (AS), also in good perfume, good clothing and other things. I would not tell you the name of my perfume, because I dont want you to want it for your milk man, who does not care for the Cow! Lol.

I asked you to tell me anything you emulate Jesus in. All you did was tap dance around it. Oh, I forgot. You emulate Paul, who started the 3 godheads belief. By the way I emulate Jesus in many things, just the same way I emulate Muhammad!



[Quote]
Why are you guys massacring christians then in Nigeria over a simple doughnut?
[/quote]

Aburo. I live in New York City. Dont ask me about Nigeria, because I will not give you a firsthand information. By the way, the Christians among the Palestinians are not been massacred, and they are allowed to worship in this "Christmas holiday."


[Quote]
No, Lagos is not. Lagos is an authentic Christendom. Ibadan can be 50/50.
[/quote]

Evidently, you dont know anything about these two cities. Let me add Abeokuta, Ikorodu, Epe, and others like Ilaro to the Muslim cities and town from Yorubaland. Did I mention Ijebu Ode, and many Ijebu towns with their traditional Baloguns. How about Oyo, Ilaro, Oshogbo, Ogbomosho, Ede, and others?

You that I ignore Ekiti, where KarmaMod is from. I know she is a Keferi.

Aburo, enu e pooju! Lol. I am very satisfied with my women. There is no desire for sugar or honey, especially from you!

Please stop lying. You know your member is bowing down and up anytime you hear Funmi.

I am almost sure there is no man in Orile kingdom, where you have your blood in Yorubaland, with a single wife, except that everyman has more than one wife! Listen, I am entitled to up to 4! I have the appetite and all the acutrements for my taste. I like prime ribs, yet I love rough meat, while I will not neglect chicken, and fish is also in my alley

.
Orolu kingdom. My family are a bunch of born again christians and they don't practice polygamy.

I emulate Muhammad (AS), also in good perfume, good clothing and other things. I would not tell you the name of my perfume, because I don't want you to want it for your milk man, who does not care for the Cow! Lol.

Lmao, did Mohammed wear perfume in his days?

I asked you to tell me anything you emulate Jesus in. All you did was tap dance around it. Oh, I forgot. You emulate Paul, who started the 3 godheads belief. By the way I emulate Jesus in many things, just the same way I emulate Muhammad!

I emulate Jesus by staying against polygamy

Aburo. I live in New York City. don't ask me about Nigeria, because I will not give you a firsthand information. By the way, the Christians among the Palestinians are not been massacred, and they are allowed to worship in this "Christmas holiday."

Ask around about what your muslim brothers are doing in Nigeria. You don't have to be there.

Evidently, you don't know anything about these two cities. Let me add Abeokuta, Ikorodu, Epe, and others like Ilaro to the Muslim cities and town from Yorubaland. Did I mention Ijebu Ode, and many Ijebu towns with their traditional Baloguns. How about Oyo, Ilaro, Oshogbo, Ogbomosho, Ede, and others?

Show me stat. I thought you didn't know anything about Nigeria. You are a New Yorker, remember?

You that I ignore Ekiti, where KarmaMod is from. I know she is a Keferi.

Being a born again christian, you are required by God to forgive and forget. 

First off, the ". . . and forget part" sounds a bit like a stretch. No one is required to forget.

Plus, does the Hebrew God really forgive, let alone, forget?
.

@earTHMama: « #12 on: Today at 07:21:27 AM »

Please stop lying. You know your member is bowing down and up anytime you hear Funmi.

Thats french? I dont understand you. You lost me. And i dont know why I should lie to you? I dont even know you! lol.
Does the milk man who does not tend to the cow knows that you speak this much Swahili? I hope he is a Nigerian. pity him though. Someday, with all your dominatrix energy, you make him take a second seat to you. You should marry him, since you are looking for someone docile enough to dominate. He is right there with you.

Abi, you they fear the advantage you enjoy now over him, will be lost when you become a wife? The operative word is "WIFE!" Take the plunge. Okay?


[Quote]
Orolu kingdom. My family are a bunch of born again christians and they don't practice polygamy.
[/quote]

Sorry. I write Orile all the time. Oju ti ndoju agba. lol. I guess I need glasses.
But its not only your family that inhabits Orolu Kingdom, Funmi. Oniro niwo Omode yi. I saw Oyinbo woman in the Picture. Obviously, she is not from you family. Unless you are from Australia, the outback where she came from.

You should know better that polygamy is the twin brother of African men. All men all over the world, as a matter of good information. Except others, eg Europeans exchange more than One wife for One wife and many Outside Flings.


[Quote]
Lmao, did Mohammed wear perfume in his days?
[/quote]

Laugh a likkle bit. Yes there were many perfumes in the days. How do you think muslims are wearers of perfumes? And we shave our hairs, too. You know nothing about nothing, Funmi.


[Quote]
I emulate Jesus by staying against polygamy
[/quote]

Was he even married? A confirmed bachelor he was. Just like John (AS).
Iro lonpa. Ti enikan ba da owo lue nsinyin, you will jump, spring to every command he gives. You have a price girl. And its not that high, either. Under 5M. Am sure. LOL.

Where is Osisi? I want her to see how I am throwing a kinda shticks to RedHotChic of Orolu Kingdom. LOL.


[Quote]
Ask around about what your muslim brothers are doing in Nigeria. You don't have to be there.
[/quote]

Your argument here I will use it against you, in a minute. Nigeria is large. If every event blamed on religious rift, then I wonder if Christianity should not be blamed for the Civil war: Ojukwu and Gowon are Christians! LOL. Ogbon agba.


[Quote]
Show me stat. I thought you didn't know anything about Nigeria. You are a New Yorker, remember?
[/quote]

Except that I lived in those cities. I know them well. I often get good information from them. In my days, they were Muslim cities. I know they have not became Keferi cities. Allah will not let it happen, except if they have increased in bad deeds.

Thats french? I don't understand you. You lost me. And i don't know why I should lie to you? I don't even know you! lol.
Does the milk man who does not tend to the cow knows that you speak this much Swahili? I hope he is a Nigerian. pity him though. Someday, with all your dominatrix energy, you make him take a second seat to you. You should marry him, since you are looking for someone docile enough to dominate. He is right there with you.

Abi, you they fear the advantage you enjoy now over him, will be lost when you become a wife? The operative word is "WIFE!" Take the plunge. Okay?

say the truth and shame the devil. You got it all hots for me but it's a pity i ain't feeling ya.

Sorry. I write Orile all the time. Oju ti ndoju agba. lol. I guess I need glasses.

Or you can get one of your wives to read for you. You got how many wives now? 3 or 4 ?

But its not only your family that inhabits Orolu Kingdom, Funmi. Oniro niwo Omode yi. I saw Oyinbo woman in the Picture. Obviously, she is not from you family. Unless you are from Australia, the outback where she came from.

Of course there are polygamists there but you said before it's every man that is into it. Polygamy is UnGodly and evil.

You should know better that polygamy is the twin brother of African men. All men all over the world, as a matter of good information. Except others, eg Europeans exchange more than One wife for One wife and many Outside Flings.

Just like Nigerian men love to cheat. Shall we accept it because cheating is like a brother to them? You need Jesus badly.

Laugh a likkle bit. Yes there were many perfumes in the days. How do you think muslims are wearers of perfumes? And we shave our hairs, too. You know nothing about nothing, Funmi.

Did Mohammed also wear love-vendor suits like a mack daddy?. Why was he into perfumes? body odor or halitosis?

Where is Osisi? I want her to see how I am throwing a kind of shticks to RedHotChic of Orolu Kingdom. LOL.

She is celebrating xmas with her HUSBAND and children. Leave her alone and the least you can do is wish her a happy xmas in the xmas thread. You are very virile Ola. Your potency can intoxicate a woman. what a libido.

Your argument here I will use it against you, in a minute. Nigeria is large. If every event blamed on religious rift, then I wonder if Christianity should not be blamed for the Civil war: Ojukwu and Gowon are Christians! LOL. Ogbon agba.

Was the war political or religious?. How many civil wars have we had in Nigeria and how many religious wars ? do the math.

Except that I lived in those cities. I know them well. I often get good information from them. In my days, they were Muslim cities. I know they have not became Keferi cities. Allah will not let it happen, except if they have increased in bad deeds.

Now you are conversant with Nigerians cities?. For your information, a lot has changed since you left Nigeria 30 years ago. Go home.

Aburo, I do go home. InshaAllah I will be there in March. I will spend at least six months or so. lol. You are a funny girl.

Aburo, I do go home. InshaAllah I will be there in March. I will spend at least six months or so. lol. You are a funny girl.

6 months?. Are you going to leave your wives dry like that for 6 months?. How will you take care of your sexual needs at home if you don't have another mistress lined up for you? Odiwka risky!

Odikwa risky? Whats that?

Zainab does not live in USA. She comes. And she goes. She has a live of her own. And remember I am entitled to 4. I have not married up to 4, yet. Although line up. And America is not the only country on earth. I am not sedentary. Noo.

Odikwa risky? Whats that?

Ask your ibo wife

Zainab does not live in USA. She comes. And she goes. She has a live of her own. And remember I am entitled to 4. I have not married up to 4, yet. Although line up. And America is not the only country on earth. I am not sedentary. Noo.

You are smart not to try that polygamist BS in the states cos your ass will be in jail by now. You have a line up? Am I in your wish list?

Sometimes this section is a battle field of different religions and beliefs that show hate towards who doesnt believe the same as them

I wish we could just get over our differences in religion and just be kind to one another. After all in all religions, no matter which one you believe in or follow - all teach about LOVE and none of them say to be hateful.

Peace