I know when a man and a woman get married, they are expected to be faithful to each other and any act of infidelity is a ground for divorce.

However, being married to one woman/man does not cut off all attractions to others. The question is how to handle such attraction so that it doesn't result to infidelity.

The purpose of this thread is to seek the opinion of Nlders on how best to handle your attraction to other people such that it doesn't destroy your marriage. And to know how you folks feel when your partner begins to show their attraction to others in your presence. For instance, let's take a scenario where a guy and his young wife are watching a movie featuring say Tonto Dike and the guy keeps admiring her back side or those sexy lips of hers , or let's say it's a movie featuring Ramsey Noah, and the lady keeps admiring him, how would you feel/react under such circumstance where your spouse is openly showing attraction for another?

I feel comfortable, I be spirit ni

Na just mere admiration now.

Lmao... I always find it hilarious watching the reaction of women whose spouses deliberately compliment another woman's beauty in their presence - you can almost see her skin fluster from blood rush while desperately trying to act unfazed.

Women just don't like it, no matter how hard they try to pretend it doesn't matter...

crackhaus:
Lmao... I always find it hilarious watching the reaction of women whose spouses deliberately compliment another woman's beauty in their presence - you can almost see her skin fluster from blood rush while desperately trying to act unfazed.

Women just don't like it, no matter how hard they try to pretend it doesn't matter...

lol..you are right bro.

brito:
I feel comfortable, I be spirit ni

sarcasm

kent79:
Na just mere admiration now.

All acts of marital infidelity begin with mere admiration.

I am jst one indifferent wife/mother
Infact ehn I call on him to see how hawt she is even if I know he's seen her before me
Let's give her a lift na

It depends on how the person goes about it.
There's no person that doesn't admire someone of the opposite sex once in a while.
Dropping a passing comment on how pretty or handsome one actor or musician is, won't ruin anybody's marriage.

But acting fixated on them,always talking about them or how you wish you can have them in the presence of your wife or husband (believe some folks are that xtupid) will surely cause feelings of inadequacy in your spouse.
The simple message behind those comments is that you consider your spouse second place and is only settling with them because you weren't 'lucky' enough to be with your crush.

Hmm wisdom is profitable to.........finish it

dytbabe:
I am jst one indifferent wife/mother
Infact ehn I call on him to see how hawt she is even if I know he's seen her before me
Let's give her a lift na

Absolutely NOTHING!
I am sooooooo immune to such pettiness!
Open marriage is the best rememBA?

donpeey22:
I know when a man and a woman get married, they are expected to be faithful to each other and any act of infidelity is a ground for divorce.

However, being married to one woman/man does not cut off all attractions to others. The question is how to handle such attraction so that it doesn't result to infidelity.

The purpose of this thread is to seek the opinion of Nlders on how best to handle your attraction to other people such that it doesn't destroy your marriage. And to know how you folks feel when your partner begins to show their attraction to others in your presence. For instance, let's take a scenario where a guy and his young wife are watching a movie featuring say Tonto Dike and the guy keeps admiring her back side or those sexy lips of hers , or let's say it's a movie featuring Ramsey Noah, and the lady keeps admiring him, how would you feel/react under such circumstance where your spouse is opening showing attraction for another?

My husband thinks isha cesay of CNN and Tamron Hall on MSNBC are very attractive women and I refer to them as his babes
Means absolutely nothing to me.if he acknowledges a beautiful woman on the street ,doesn't bother me one bit,I will join and concur that the girl is indeed beautiful.
I am that confident in myself
Why should I be bothered about a woman on a TV Screen or a stranger passing by?
I have my own eyes kwa
Life is too short to be bothering about frivolous stuff

I'm indifferent to such. I even show him when he doesn't see sef.

Wendy80:
I'm indifferent to such. I even show him when he doesn't see sef.

Thank you
Me too rofl
I know he likes big boobs and when we pass a girl with big boobs either of us may make a comment and I will tease him about it

I couldn't care less

babyosisi:


Thank you
Me too rofl
I know he likes big boobs and when we pass a girl with big boobs either of us may make a comment and I will tease him about it

Mine likes big bom(thank God I have) so I show him when he doesn't see on time.
Some wives trouble demselves unnecessary.
Eyes must see.

babyosisi:


My husband thinks isha cesay of CNN and Tamron Hall on MSNBC are very attractive women and I refer to them as his babes
Means absolutely nothing to me.if he acknowledges a beautiful woman on the street ,doesn't bother me one bit,I will join and concur that the girl is indeed beautiful.
I am that confident in myself
Why should I be bothered about a woman on a TV Screen or a stranger passing by?
I have my own eyes kwa
Life is too short to be bothering about frivolous stuff

wow! Really?! Honestly, there's always this feeling of jealousy that comes with one's partner admiring another person. It is natural and I think it's better for one to just hide the feeling instead of flaunting it to the partner.

donpeey22:
wow! Really?! Honestly, there's always this feeling of jealousy that comes with one's partner admiring another person. It is natural and I think it's better for one to just hide the feeling instead of flaunting it to the partner.

Every sensible man would know not to dwell on that conversation but leave it at the innocent humor level
I have absolutely no Problem with my man voicing out that another woman was beautiful

donpeey22:
wow! Really?! Honestly, there's always this feeling of jealousy that comes with one's partner admiring another person. It is natural and I think it's better for one to just hide the feeling instead of flaunting it to the partner.

admiring is not the same thing as lusting after.

cococandy:
admiring is not the same thing as lusting after.

sorry, I actually meant to say lusting after.

babyosisi:



Every sensible man would know not to dwell on that conversation but leave it at the innocent humor level
I have absolutely no Problem with my man voicing out that another woman was beautiful

Not actually voicing out that the person is beautiful but desiring to have the person

cococandy:
It depends on how the person goes about it.
There's no person that doesn't admire someone of the opposite sex once in a while.
Dropping a passing comment on how pretty or handsome one actor or musician is, won't ruin anybody's marriage.

But acting fixated on them,alway his talking about them or how you wish you can have them in the presence of your wife or husband (believe some folks are that xtupid) will surely cause feelings of inadequacy in your spouse.
The simple message behind those comments is that you consider your spouse second place and is only settling with them because you weren't 'lucky' enough to be with your crush.

Hmm wisdom is profitable to.........finish it

You are absolutely right Lorrie!

donpeey22:
Not actually voicing out that the person is beautiful but desiring to have the person

He is allowed to make jokes like that with me doesn't bother me
I have no reason to believe he has or will act on it and I am secure in myself

I also make jokes about how sexy ultra rich men are and it doesn't bother him

babyosisi:


He is allowed to make jokes like that with me doesn't bother me

Hmmm. Like seriously?!

donpeey22:
Hmmm. Like seriously?!

Very serious
I have been out of town a few nights and when we spoke last night he asked what man was keeping me warm over there
And I said you don't wanna know the rugged cowboy I have in here
The teases and jokes and humor are part of what attracted us to each other in the first place
I guess it may not work for some uptight folks

babyosisi:


Very serious
I have been out of town a few nights and when we spoke last night he asked what man was keeping me warm over there
And I said you don't wanna know the rugged cowboy I have in here
The teases and jokes and humor are part of what attracted us to each other in the first place
I guess it may not work for some uptight folks

Okay! That's an expensive joke shaaa ooo! But to each his own.

cococandy:
admiring is not the same thing as lusting after.

This is true but if it's just someone on TV he is lusting after then should it even be a big deal. Many people have celebrity crushes but how many of us will ever actually meet them and then get a chance to act out those feelings.

donpeey22:
Okay! That's an expensive joke shaaa ooo! But to each his own.

LOL. You sound so possessive. Please marry accordingly or you might run mad

soulglo:


LOL. You sound so possessive. Please marry accordingly or you might run mad

Hmmm. I am one hell of a jealous lover oooo.

soulglo:


This is true but if it's just someone on TV he is lusting after then should it even be a big deal. Many people have celebrity crushes but how many of us will ever actually meet them and then get a chance to act out those feelings.

well...to me admiration is allowed.
Saying how pretty some TV ladies are doesn't count as offensive to me because I say that too about some cute male actors.

Lust on its own is a natural thing that catches most of us unawares.
But If he finds himself lusting after a babe,he better not keep dwelling on those feelings especially not in my presence.

Saying it once is enough. Repeat it and I'll give him the evil eye.

I Had an ex who was so hung up on Megan Good that he started seeing her in me.
I don't even know if there's an inch of resemblance between me and the lady but he thought so obviously because he was subconsciously using me to make up for not having her. He kept harping on it. And the way he would rush any movie she acted and get so lost in it? Hmmm
Plus Plenty Pictures of her in his phone and laptop too. His own celebrity worship of her was too much.

Most uncomfortable date I ever had.
Was I going to try to be Megan Good?
Or accept that I'm like her to please him?

The thing Didn't last jare.

There is a difference between crushing on celebs or passerbys you probably would never meet and crushing on your acquintances

Admiring and complimenting beautiful acquintances is part of normal relationships

cococandy:
well...to me admiration is allowed.
Saying how pretty some TV ladies are doesn't count as offensive to me because I say that too about some cute male actors.

Lust on its own is a natural thing that catches most of us unawares.
But If he finds himself lusting after a babe,he better not keep dwelling on those feelings especially not in my presence.

Saying it once is enough. Repeat it and I'll give him the evil eye.

I Had an ex who was so hung up on Megan Good that he started seeing her in me.
I don't even know if there's an inch of resemblance between me and the lady but he thought so obviously because he was subconsciously using me to make up for not having her. He kept harping on it. And the way he would rush any movie she acted and get so lost in it? Hmmm
Plus Plenty Pictures of her in his phone and laptop too. His own celebrity worship of her was too much.

Most uncomfortable date I ever had.
Was I going to try to be Megan Good?
Or accept that I'm like her to please him?

The thing Didn't last jare.

This is more like an obsession. Lust on steroids