Please Dont Let This Computer Kill Me!

I've just acquired a brand new Dell CPx Laptop, Vintage Circa1998, so powerful that is 64mb/10gg. Guess I must be at least the proud 4th owner.

The only problem is its so slow that it does not run Word and Excel XP well, even when they are the only programs installed not counting Windows Media Player. also, I use this excellent machine to browse from Starcom with magnificient results. I website per night.

I tried to reload windows, but the software could not boot the speed machine, I downloaded All the window updates, and now Windows alone is occupying 2 point something gig of the harddisk.

Question:

How do I make it run faster so my family would stop laughing at me?
Please help before me or the Machine comit suicide.(One of us must kill the other, N60,000 is no joke).

No Long Things Pleeeese. You know I'm not YET a whiz.

Love to all Nairalanders.

Get more ram first unless its windows 98 u are installing.

Thank you, where? is Do It Yourself thing?

It's probably too old to be able to accomodate much more ram. It's time to throw it away.

Seun,
you wan make the pal commit hara kiri (either to himself or the computer). If nothing else works, at least im get  'museum' showcase.

Haba my bros Cade, who you ask before you purchase 64Mb/ 10 Gb machine (thought dey no dey make these kin things again).

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64mb/10gg.yeeeeeeeeeeeepaaaaaaa!
I'm still laughing , when i'm through i'll make my post. No vex o

una still dey discuss this 'computer' - the threads never pass him 10 Gb, abi una wan take style kill di broder.

bros Cade, jus go find the person wey collect ya 60K and give am back the yeye calculator wey him sell to you.

Ugwumba:

una still dey discuss this 'computer' - the threads never pass him 10 Gb, abi una wan take style kill di broder.

bros Cade, jus go find the person wey collect ya 60K and give am back the yeye calculator wey him sell to you.

True talk! Where did you buy that calculator? 64MB? Even with 512MB here sef i still beat myself up sometimes when the laptop takes it into his head to be slow!
Dont throw it away o! Put it up in your household museum!

How do u browse with that playstation? In fact starcomms sef dey gba igbakugba!
Anyway when u talk say na 60k u buy am i conclude say the problem is inhouse as they say "charity begins at home". Come over i have 1 kain lappy like that with 32mb ram / 600mb hdd for sale (just 50k)

On a more serious note. throw the scrap away. Dont try upgrading the processor because your system need a total overhaul aka reincarnation. Do put ferrari engine on a volkswagen bettele o. It could be suicidal.

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Others have given you good advice. That lappy is just too slow to do anything. Now, if a laptop is having problems running ordinary MS Word, it's time to move on. It's probably "fairly Used" because it cannot be used. If you really paid 60,000 naira for that thing, which is a little over $400, you should run to the seller and get your money back. That's straight up "daylight robbery". New Entry level Dell laptops (512 megs ram. 40 gig HD, 15.4 screen, etc. ) can be got for about $450. I just bought one to bring home for my sister in a few weeks. With a couple of upgrades, it only cost me $489. 

I see the prices paid for laptops/electronics/phones  out there, and I just wished some of the companies on this end will sell/ship to Nigeria. Unfortunately, a lot of them just will not. A lot of US based ebay sellers will not even allow you to bid if your address is in Nigeria. Obviously there are several reasons for this such as,  lack of credit system, fraud, inability to validate transaction, etc.

The only reason ebay sellers wont ship to nigeria is FRAUD, at least naija get credit card now. Go to http://expo.live.com and the second cool listing is a warning about Nigerians.
Excerpts
just a heads up our Scam Artist friends have found expo as well. I know they were playing with Craigslist recently along with ebay and all the other sites. The scam I came across is the one where they,

Tell you they will use their Western Union Money Order to pay
Tell you they will use their Fedex account to ship
Offer advice on how Western Union will verify the shipment prior to releasing payment.

If you follow through they send you a label with a Nigerian postal address. The email they send you is not from customerservice@firstdatacorp.com which is the valid western union customer service email address (mine was from firstdatacorp@mail.com).

Also note that these user's in fact may be from your hometown and not from Nigeria or any country, city, or state, they claim

Cade:

Please Dont Let This Computer Kill Me!

I've just acquired a brand new Dell CPx Laptop, Vintage Circa1998, so powerful that is 64mb/10gg. Guess I must be at least the proud 4th owner.

The only problem is its so slow that it does not run Word and Excel XP well, even when they are the only programs installed not counting Windows Media Player. also, I use this excellent machine to browse from Starcom with magnificient results. I website per night.

I tried to reload windows, but the software could not boot the speed machine, I downloaded All the window updates, and now Windows alone is occupying 2 point something gig of the harddisk.

Question:

How do I make it run faster so my family would stop laughing at me?
Please help before me or the Machine comit suicide.(One of us must kill the other, N60,000 is no joke).

No Long Things Pleeeese. You know I'm not YET a whiz.

Love to all Nairalanders.

Cade, my sincere advice to you would be install Linux, preferably Ubuntu and then install the XFCE window manager. Other than that, throw it away.

The recently released Ubuntu would not work well on 64MB, to run the live CD requires 256MB and the installation is done via running the live cd. I think he should just install windows 95 or 98. It would work perfectly well

my advice to u is to confirm if the laptop can be upgraded(i.e. increasing the RAM to 256MB and getting a HDD of atleast 40Gb).Some laptops dont even run well on 128MB. If it can be upgraded go ahead and do the upgrading, else keep that laptop out of sight because its as good as a 386 machine. But the person wey sell am to you really wound you. When did you become a nairalander? You should have told the house about the laptop b4 paying 4 it. We would have adviced you to to go for it; any way its already late. Let us know b4 you buy the next laptop oo. Just take heart.

@ topic 

Dell is always bad news.
Can you give us the specs?

Also you said its brand new and you just bought it, Return it if its giving you too much headache.

man that laptop is a fraud. return it to the man and negotiate a refund or the frustration 'll kill you. am sure my phone's processor is faster than its.

Hello CADE,you said it is a Dell CPx Laptop, Vintage Circa1998 with 64MB,10gigs.I have fixed and upgraded a system worse than yours, very successfully.You need to answer the following questions,

IS THE PROCESSOR FAN WORKING?
DOES YOUR 10 GIG HD MAKE CRACKING NOISES?
DOES THE BOTTOM SIDE HEAT UP AFTER SOME MINS?
DOES WINDOWS SHOW ERRORS FREQUENTLY?