quivah:
Nigerians are hypocrites .. gosh!!

so you men can't stand a cheating spouse but won't blink twice before putting your deak in every Sandra ruka outside marriage... so you know how exactly it hurts to be cheated on but you just don't care so far you ain't the victim..weak a.s.ses

this same people asking the op to kick her out will tell the 'victim' to exercise patience if it was the other way round.. gosh! most of these men are irritating!

@op its rare seeing a Nigerian man like you ...but its just sad, the other men think you are weak.. its your life, your marriage... but honestly, the woman no try..after a NIGERIAN man forgave your cheating a.s.s , you still went back.. talk about, cheating is in her DNA the ball is in your court.


I wonder why I haven't seen the 'pray, maybe you are not Doing things right, dress sexy, take her out, red boxers,divorce should be the last resort' crew.. oh! maybe cause he's a man!

even @dinachi dropped the divorce card without his usual 'check yourself, you are the reason she cheated' note he do drop if women were the victim thumbs up

only women are to take sh.its

Madam no long story, if she can't stand a cheating Hubby, she should pack out.
AIDS is no respecter of Gender you hear.

georgementday:
Reason with her and if she refuse to change,go ur seperate ways. The worse tin dat can happen to a man is livin wth a cheatin wife

Sorry but cheats don't change!! take it from me,
@OP the more you confront her all you will get is tears, remorseful petitions, lies and more lies, you would only force her to fake and lie more and more to you.
I went through a similar thing, i thought i could save her, but alas bro' got more and more sophisticated in he lies.. It will get to a point you have to make one of two hard choices:
1. Pretend you don't see whats happening while praying that maybe she changes (mind you this change will only come if something severe hits her that is something life threatening TRUST me when i saw Lord Jesus laying hands on a cheat wont change her)

OR

2. Walk away: every fibre of your bein tells you this is the right thing to do, but its always the hardest for people who are married to or dating a cheater!!

i have always taken the time to explain to victims of cheating partners and i will do so again now!!if your partner cheats walsk away!!! staying only hurts you or the person!!! I wish i could make this all poetic by telling you that you can always forgive but that would be a lie, two things you never forget in life, the day you loose your parent and the day you discovered that your partner cheated on you!!!!

So do yourselves both a favour and split because staying would make you hold your self to unrealistic standards by having to act all forgiven;y mature when inside you are dying , worst still are the random thoughts that pop into your head occasionally like, woow is this how she kissed him too? did she hold him like that too, did she make love to him differently? you see while you can oride yourself for being ever so forgiving you just cant stop these thoughts, even if u fast for 100 days and nights.

You need time to heal from such emotional trauma and the best medicine is a clean break.

That is really gonna be hard for a man to swallow but I bet at this momemt in ur life is the point u need the strength from God and alot of prayers! I have an uncle who went through the same experience but do u knw wht he did...he practically changed over night did the nicest things to his wife, jst like d moments when he was courtin her if not better.one of those days he took her out on a candle light dinner in an expensive restaurant, bought her red roses had them play her favourite songs, whispered into her ears and said 'I know wht you have been doin but pls be careful' cos he still loved her.from that momemt she broke up her extra marital affair cos she was not even getin this type of romance from the relationship. Many people will go the extra mile to protect what they have jst soo that d relatiionship may sustain.Your son is too younger to understand what seperation or divorce is.It is obvious you still love ur wife, if your thinkin of havin ur pound of flesh by seein someone else you will do alot of damage to ur marriage...muster the courage to forgive her, as men our ego plays tricks on us but I belive we can conquer it.May God help us all!!!!

BREAK- UP

firstEVA:
I feel for you, but pls forgive her since you have the heart to, you have put your child as your major consideration and I believe you're doing the right thing, have a heart to heart talk with her on why you're still staying back in the marriage, she will change for good. A united home is always better for children.

For where? I hope una know a flirting woman? From the story, this is the second round of her flirting. That kind of woman is only interested in the pleasures abi sweetness arising from sex, the joy and other benefits from the new man. She will never change. I move round this country especially because of this election, I know what am talking about. This woman should be allowed to go. Any where these women are gathered, their first area of concentration is the sweetness of civilisation about modern societies. They discuss that live these days is dependent on how much one can enjoy, especially when it come to love affairs. They claim that there is no point tying oneself since live is damn too short etc. Nor be one pekin them get? No problem. Let this woman leave and go her own way.

If you still love her, beg her to stop cheating and don't continue reading this.


















Ok, now that you are still reading I have two options.

1. Set a trap, catch her red handed and then file for divorce. When the time comes to talk about child custody, her promiscuity has already given you a good chance of getting custody because she has already proved she is irresponsible. Even if she gets custody, you will be asked to pay child support until the child is old enough to decide who he wants to live with. Don't worry, most of them always choose their fathers when they are 18 because the few times you will spend together, there will be no spanking or scolding just fun times that mummy always cuts short.

2. Set her up and blackmail her into leaving quietly without the child.

If you choose to play tit for tat, na you go tire o! E go reach where your eyes no go fit take am again.

A cheating wife is a MURDERER. Men can cheat on their wives without killing them! Women find it difficult to cheat on their husbands without killing their husbands!! Stay there and keep asking what you are supposed to do until she finally kills you!!!

SagePerv:
She cheated on you and she's still into it but yet, you do still want something to do with her?


--- I admire your heart.

Na death dey hungry the guy! Aids calling.

my advice to you, cut her loose and let her go cos she will cheat on you again.I had the same issue 3 years ago, I forgave her and took her in again because of my son, I truly forgave her. About a month ago I found out she was still communicating with the same person and both of them expressing love for one another again.I confronted her yesterday and she is not even sorry, so tonite she will leave my home for good.
Don't put yourself thru the kind of torment I put myself thru,let her go, you deserve better.your son is grown now he knows you.let her go and enjoy the peace of God. plenty of good women out there.

Amusaopeyemi:
Leave her instead.
Don't score points by cheating on her, doing so is immature.
If she catches you first, she'll turn the table around and believe me it'll be in her favour. We ladies could be so deceitful.
I believe in forgiveness but in this case I don't think forgiveness can work, she forgot her vows. "For better for worse, in sickness and in health, till death do us part" are not mere words. A cheating wife is capable of killing her husband.

I love your OT....Golden!!

82sarahluv:
My wife has cheated on me during a tough time for us. We got back together 2 months ago, but I found out she is still in touch with him. Should I leave her, or have an affair of my own? We have a 5 year old son - this is why I'm not able to consider leaving her easily.
Thanks to all of you who have not jumped on the 'having my own affair' part. I only added this as an option because, her having an affair completely shattered my confidence as a man and is affecting my personal and professional life. I have considered an affair as a way to prove to myself that I can still have a partner if we separate. But now I realize how silly that is. I'm going to try talking it out with her again and resolve this like a man, and hope that will restore confidence in myself.

she left you when things were tough and came back? why did she come back? is she being maltreated where she went to?

most times when things like this happen, she has the tendency to leave you again when the opportunity arise, think it deep. if you feel you want her because of your child, hmmmm, u fit lose your life ooo.

i believe any married woman that cheats on her husband and still does even after the husband knows , can KILL the husband!!!!

Iyalasisi:
me seff dey wonder say shey dis kain good hearted man still dey...

but u no tell dem say u cheated on mi
and I still forgive u cos of ma kind heart

kunmis1:




but u no tell dem say u cheated on mi
and I still forgive u cos of ma kind heart

joker! Our own case different nao

runnazz:


I love your OT....Golden!!

Thanks but what is OT

.

82sarahluv:
My wife has cheated on me during a tough time for us. We got back together 2 months ago, but I found out she is still in touch with him. Should I leave her, or have an affair of my own? We have a 5 year old son - this is why I'm not able to consider leaving her easily.
Thanks to all of you who have not jumped on the 'having my own affair' part. I only added this as an option because, her having an affair completely shattered my confidence as a man and is affecting my personal and professional life. I have considered an affair as a way to prove to myself that I can still have a partner if we separate. But now I realize how silly that is. I'm going to try talking it out with her again and resolve this like a man, and hope that will restore confidence in myself.

smh.. I can't believe I'm reading this. Well, that's what good men go through. Hehehe you considered having an affairs to prove you can still have a partner? Are you kidding me? I think inferiority complex have eaten so deep into you. Ofcourse you are a man and you can have as many partners while married and even more women sniffing around you when you are single again.
Your wife have noticed that you are not a womanizer and believes you doesn't have the courage to talk to other women, that's why she's busy sleeping around with no fears that another woman may take her place. Worst is that you seperated and came back together yet, she's still seeing him. Two things- either she used juju on you or she is the one feeding you.

Please, you need to get a DNA test on that boy you think its your son, stop having sex with her so you don't kill yourself with STD. And stop eating her food cos she is soo into the other man that she may kill you and free herself for good since you doesn't want to let her go.

Wake up oga!!!

Divorce her already

use magun.

Amusaopeyemi:

Thanks but what is OT

You r welcome..i meant (OT)orientation as in your attitude, beliefs,feeling as relating the topic

Why waste time talking to her?....her head is set that way. Divorce her. Doesn't matter how much you talk or what she promises... the only change would be for her to cover her escapades very well. You can hang around if you want until you are tested HIV positive.... or until you find out the next child is not yours. Who knows...maybe the one you think is yours is not.... go get a DNA test done...pronto.

holluwai:
Is she from Benin?

Its not ideal you go tribalistic on an issue like this.The last time I checked Men and Women all over the world cheat on their partners.It has nothing to do with race or tribe.Its just the mindset of some individuals to cheat and feel cool about it and has nothing to do with emotional state of mind or finances.

Iyalasisi:
joker! Our own case different nao

haaaaaaa! u cheated wit four men , baby

now u r saying our own is deferent
diaris......

firstEVA:
I feel for you, but pls forgive her since you have the heart to, you have put your child as your major consideration and I believe you're doing the right thing, have a heart to heart talk with her on why you're still staying back in the marriage, she will change for good. A united home is always better for children.

. Aunty do u cheat in ur marriage too( if u are married) and if u don't what will u advise ur brother who love u so much In this situation? My sister hypocricy is crazy what u can't take don't wish or do it to others. @ OP my brother, though it is the last resort to divorce, u may live the rest of ur life an unhappy man if u maintain this relationship. U are not a man enough if u retaliate, and it will not make the worse thing better. So leave her and face a new life. For me dont just let me catch u, that day I catch u, you are going back to ur mum without my children. Shikena.

Na wa o but I had an experience like this but don't go into any secret affair cos na double wahala u wan cause yourself o, I kno wat I am saying o, let her be , allow her to go , she needs to go out and enjoy herself and after she leaves it's left to u to decide having another woman but be careful cos I dis women sef, their case dey God hand o

82sarahluv:
My wife has cheated on me during a tough time for us. We got back together 2 months ago, but I found out she is still in touch with him. Should I leave her, or have an affair of my own? We have a 5 year old son - this is why I'm not able to consider leaving her easily.
Thanks to all of you who have not jumped on the 'having my own affair' part. I only added this as an option because, her having an affair completely shattered my confidence as a man and is affecting my personal and professional life. I have considered an affair as a way to prove to myself that I can still have a partner if we separate. But now I realize how silly that is. I'm going to try talking it out with her again and resolve this like a man, and hope that will restore confidence in myself.

boss, pls dont have an affair coz two wrongs make no ryt. Its best to leave her if she doesnt want to change...

Amusaopeyemi:
Leave her instead.
Don't score points by cheating on her, doing so is immature.
If she catches you first, she'll turn the table around and believe me it'll be in her favour. We ladies could be so deceitful.
I believe in forgiveness but in this case I don't think forgiveness can work, she forgot her vows. "For better for worse, in sickness and in health, till death do us part" are not mere words. A cheating wife is capable of killing her husband.

'Who who judges without mercy shall be judged without mercy'
And you are a woman?
Please make sure you leave your husband when he decides to cheat on you.
op,have a talk with your wife and build your home and dont destroy it.

sleekch1c:


'Who who judges without mercy shall be judged without mercy'
And you are a woman?
Please make sure you leave your husband when he decides to cheat on you.
op,have a talk with your wife and build your home and dont destroy it.

Rubbish!

dont have an affair,let her continue to see your faithfulnes & dedication to her, i know its difficult but its the best, ignore her cheating,pretend you dont see it, with time she will come to her conclusion that she has been making fool of herself & hurting you,she will wonder what kind of man you are,she will fear & come to beg you sincerely & love you back especially when who shes cheating with disappoint her.

Give her time,she will come to her senses soon but be very careful with her in terms of healthwise she may have contacted, dont joke with your life.

Goodluck & God gives you the grace to endure.

but some women sha!!!!

Fast and pray mister! Fast and pray! Find nice boxers, look good, get rid of your pot belly, mouth and body odour!! Love her more and more. Before you know it, at a speed of light, she will change. Fiam!!!! Dnt divorce her o. Your children will suffer in the hands of a wicked step mom. You dnt know what the next woman has in store for you or have you forgotten what time it is? Its the period of scarce good wives. No woman is a saint so make your marriage work and water your garden. The grass looks greener on the other side but all that gllitters isnt gold.

your best option is to leave, man up and get over her.

82sarahluv:
My wife has cheated on me during a tough time for us. We got back together 2 months ago, but I found out she is still in touch with him. Should I leave her, or have an affair of my own? We have a 5 year old son - this is why I'm not able to consider leaving her easily.
Thanks to all of you who have not jumped on the 'having my own affair' part. I only added this as an option because, her having an affair completely shattered my confidence as a man and is affecting my personal and professional life. I have considered an affair as a way to prove to myself that I can still have a partner if we separate. But now I realize how silly that is. I'm going to try talking it out with her again and resolve this like a man, and hope that will restore confidence in myself.

take your child from her and ditch the bicch! All the stupid talk is already pissing me off, once a woman has the tendency to cheat you can't remove it from their blood,

I want to ask 2 questions...

1. What is the cause of the initial (temporary) Spratton?
2. Before you got estranged, had she been promiscuous? Or have you had a reason to suspect her then?

Please do respond. Thanks.