Hello Nairalanders, greetings to you all. How are you? I trust that everything is going on well with you all.

Today I would love us to talk about the role of the husband in pregnancy. I’ll be writing from MY experience as a husband to a pregnant wife.

Before we go on, below are some key points:

1. I’ll be writing from the perspective of a Christian though this piece is NOT limited to Christians,

2. I have arranged this work into three parts. Each part represents a trimester,

3. Parts II and III would come up later,

4. The intention of the writer is to share thoughts with fellow fathers-to-be (and fathers) as well as to educate the general public.

PART I

Amongst the numerous reasons for marriage is procreation. It is the dream of every man and woman to have a child (or children as the case may be). I remember those days when I was much younger. While my mates discussed football, wrestling and martial arts; while they concentrated on their careers and how to make millions in the future, I sat and fantasized on how to be a husband and a father at the earliest possible time. Not that I didn’t share the same interests as my friends but the fact is that, perhaps, there is nothing I want more than being a “family man”.

The statement, “darling, I’m pregnant”, often times, marks the beginning of the path of pregnancy. However, I think “WE are pregnant” is better because it makes obvious the fact that responsibilities in pregnancy are to be shared and not necessarily limited to the wife.

So, your darling wife is pregnant and there are celebrations everywhere. The atmosphere is saturated with celebrations and jubilations. Your shoulders are raised and your expectations are high; perhaps you may have bought the pregnancy test strips to confirm, confirm, and confirm again. Maybe you are itching to observe your first ultrasound scan to see your baby (or babies), to hear that tiny heart in your wife’s womb beat rapidly. You just can’t wait to hold your tender baby in your hands. I understand the joy because I’ve been there; it is truly a period of extended euphoria.

Fathers-to-be must note that pregnancy is a phase that one must pass through before the arrival of a child. There is no shortcut; it is impossible to jump from the time of conception to the time of delivery. Between these two defined times are lots of activities, lots of dos and lots of don’ts. If all the laws are abided by, it is almost certain that the end would draw smiles on your faces.

Certain changes in pregnant women are physiological and expected; some are temporal while others may be permanent. Let us see some of these changes:

CHANGES YOUR WIFE MAY UNDERGO WHILE SHE IS IN HER FIRST TRIMESTER

1. Tiredness: This is one of the first changes observed in pregnant women. This is physiological and psychological. Ordinarily, the presence of a foetus in your wife’s womb imposes stress on her body. The relationship between the mother and the foetus is analogous to what is observed in commensalism where one organism benefits from the other without causing harm to the host. The foetus relies on the mother for nutrition, defence (about 70-80%, or more), eradication of wastes, etc. This is an extra stress on the mother because her body, originally, is programmed to cater for itself alone but now, the game is changed as there is another entity within to provide for. Disturbances of the hormone, progesterone, during pregnancy is also associated with fatigue.

Your wife’s psychology may also be a contributing factor to her tiredness. She is aware she is pregnant. She thinks of the “pregnancy” and the associated risks, she thinks of the pains of labour. Never underestimate the things women hear and read when it comes to pregnancy. The information she is exposed to may instil fear in her and fear is stressful while stress is tiring!

2. Loss of Appetite: This could be frustrating to the husband. The things you know your wife likes, those things you always get her as you return home may become repulsive rather than appealing. My wife was a fan of gizzard. Gizzard was almost always present in our stews but now, things have changed. The sight of gizzard can kill her appetite for an entire day! Things are that bad.

3. Mood Swings: This is very important because if not well understood, it could cause problems in your home. Your wife may switch from one mood to the other in a matter of minutes. 10:51AM: Happy! 10:52AM: Unexplained sadness. 10:53AM: Angry! 10:54AM: Leave-me-alone! The list is endless.

4. Return of Appetite: Yea, you read that right. Mr. Appetite may actually return to the Kingdom of Pregnancy in this story. And this time around, he may come HEAVY. Later in the first trimester, your wife’s appetite may return. Sometimes, my wife eats her dinner in three phases – Dinner Phase 1, Phase 2, and Phase 3. I’m not talking about multiple eating of small bits of food, no. That appetite scares me sometimes.

5. Food Craving: Of all the changes associated with pregnancy, I find this one the funniest. My mother-in-law once told me that in one of her pregnancies, she always traveled a journey of about 20 minutes in search of agidi. Funny, isn’t it? This is true in most pregnancies. Before now, my wife’s best soup was Afang Soup but now, she can go any extent to get her newly found love – Okra Soup! She doesn’t care about meat or fish. All she needs is her okra, palm oil and some spices and food is ready. She is that serious with the soup.

6. Sleep: The body refreshes itself when we sleep. You should expect a lot of this in the first trimester of your wife’s pregnancy especially if she has a lot of free times. I love to watch my wife sleep. Sometimes, I sit next to her and watch her thorax rise and fall in response to her breathing. How peaceful!

7. Restlessness: You may call this sleeplessness. Your pregnant wife may spend about an hour in search of a “comfortable sleep posture” as she rolls from one side of the bed to the other. Sometimes, her breathing may be disturbed too. This may be due to the fact that her consciousness may have taken over the autonomic control of her respiration. When we consciously breathe, it is almost impossible to conduct gaseous exchange at the right rate and amount. It is also tiring to consciously breathe in and out repeatedly. This is why respiration, majorly, is regulated at the autonomic level.

8. Weight Gain: Most times, there is a significant gain of weight in pregnancy. In the first trimester however, weight gain may not be obvious but this does not mean that it is absent. There is a visible enlargement of body components. Your wife’s habits and genetic composition may influence her weight gain.

There are many other changes that I may not have listed above. This is why you should comment and share your thoughts because the list of changes associated with pregnancy knows no end; it varies from woman to woman.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

As a husband of a pregnant wife, there are specific roles you must play. Your wife needs support – all kinds of support – and she needs it real bad! It is not enough to get her pregnant and wait for the day of delivery. An ideal husband is a husband that follows his wife through pregnancy, step by step and from stage to stage.

In my next post, I would take you on a ride through some important roles a husband must play in his wife’s pregnancy.

….to be continued.

Nice trial but topic treated severally

Thank you OP

Nice

nice one my guy, u forgot to mention increase libido in pregnant women

Nice thread so informative.. following steadily. God bless u op. N congrats in advance

@ Tonye001, this is fun, nice read ! Kudos !

THE ROLE OF THE HUSBAND

In my initial post, we established the fact that the husband must play certain important roles in his wife’s pregnancy. We are going to take a look at some of these roles in this section:

1. A good Christian husband should pray and thank the Lord for successful conception. During sexual intercourse, sperm cells from the male are deposited into the environment of the female reproductive tract where they swim upstream to fertilize the egg if the time is right. There are many factors that may impede fertilization; these factors could be from the husband or from the mother. Sometimes, even when both parents are healthy, fertilization may not take place at all for some unexplained reasons. Other times, the fertilized egg (the zygote) may not persist. Things are that crazy. When my wife first broke the news, after the initial jubilation, we settled and thanked God for the gift of fruitfulness. We also prayed for the success of the pregnancy as well as for safe delivery. We are still praying.

2. A good husband MUST register his wife’s pregnancy as soon as possible. I hear many people say they waited for about three months before they registered in a hospital. I think this is unsafe. Immediately the pregnancy is confirmed in a laboratory, I think the next step is to ensure that your wife is registered in a good hospital. Forget about what they say about the inaccuracies of the test strips. Register as soon as you can! People may say you are being too anxious but what’s their business? If anything goes wrong, the same people would come up to ridicule you! And when you can, try and attend antenatal with your wife.

3. A good husband must ensure that his pregnant wife takes all her drugs as prescribed by her doctor. Yes, be her reminder. Ask her again and again whether she has taken her drugs. Whenever you can, make her take it in front of you. Most women are scared of drugs. Some of the frowns they wear when they swallow tablets can scare the living daylight out of a kid!

4. A good husband must make sure that his wife takes ONLY drugs prescribed by her doctor. Trust me, you and your wife cannot afford to take any drug your hands can reach. You don’t want to go down that lane. The damages you may meet may be irreversible. To add to this, it is important that you know the name of EVERY drug prescribed by your wife’s doctor. Some hospitals are fond of dispatching tablets in unlabelled envelopes. Do not let your wife swallow anything that bears no name! if you are unsure, call her doctor and confirm. Also, ensure that you document every drug she takes all through her pregnancy. This is important.

5. A good husband must make room for some excesses of his pregnant wife. We are already conversant with the changes your pregnant wife is undergoing. You must make room to accommodate these changes. You should not pick offense when she teleports from one mood to the other like Noob Sibort. You must not pick offense when she does almost nothing at home. You must understand that these changes are beyond her control.

6. Fruits, fruits, and fruits! Yes, you must ensure that your wife gets enough fruits. Your wife and your baby cannot do without them. Bananas. Oranges. Mangoes. Water melons. Pawpaws. Pineapples. You must buy these for her.

7. A good husband must monitor his wife’s health status. You must not wait for antenatal days. Ascertaining the vitals of a subject needs no special skill. These days, you can even get an automatic sphygmomanometer to check your wife’s blood pressure as regularly as you please. You can even get combination test strips to monitor her urine for proteins and glucose whenever you can. Doing this may help you detect an abnormally early thus, increasing the chances of treatment.

8. A good husband must ease the stress on his wife! That lady is going through enough stress already. You must help her wherever you can. You must fold your sleeves and dive into that kitchen and do the dishes, prepare the meal, sweep and mop, do the laundry, etc. This shouldn’t be a big deal. Remember, if you don’t, the stress on your wife may be too much and this may cause a breakdown. Na you go still spend money for hospital o.

9. A good husband must ensure that his wife takes enough rest. Yea. Allow her to rest as much as she can. Identify anything that may deprive her her rest and take responsibility of that thing. When she is asleep, put her phone on silence. Take some of her calls. Turn the TV volume down.

10. You must ensure that your wife does moderate exercise. Something as simple as walking down the street is enough, nothing too stressful.

11. It is your responsibility to ensure that your wife gets adequate nutrition. Your wife may have unreasonable cravings. Things that if not checked, may harm her. Things that contribute little or nothing to her body. You are the boss of the house. This is the time to exercise your powers. You must say, ”no”, sometimes. You should also try to come up with new, healthy things that may engage her taste. This is for her good.

12. Just like the vibration of a pendulum, your wife’s appetite may be shifting from one end to the other. This is the time to upgrade your style. Dance along with her appetite. Be creative. Your wife is already used to the dishes “around”. How about bringing those dishes “that are not around”? As a Port Harcourt boy, I know there is nothing new about Egusi Soup, Afang Soup, Ogbono Soup, Native Soup, etc. From my perspective, Bitter Leaf Soup, Ofe Owere, Ofe Nsala, etc are all new. I had to learn how to cook all these from Nairaland (https://www.nairaland.com/70692/recipes-some-igbo-soups). This thread was created by Alert on August 6th, 2007. It worked for us.

13. Trust me, no one wants Malaria to come knocking this time. It is your responsibility to protect your wife. Keep those blood-thirsty mosquitoes away. Use insecticides. Use mosquito nets. Use anything you know that can keep mosquitoes away.

Husbands, we have all learned today. I pray we all can put these to practice.

Feel free to share your thoughts and ideas.

Congratulations.

May the Lord be with you all…

Dyt:
Nice trial but topic treated severally

Thank you but this is a very sensitive topic. It can never be too much..

Weldone op. Wish other men would read and learn. Congrats in advance

I'm so proud of you OP. You are a very supportive husband.

I wish your wife safe delivery. God bless your home.

Chai! see better husband material 5000 yards

chinnelle:
Chai! see better husband material 5000 yards

Lol

Nice one Op. Your fellow men need to be taught abeg. A lot of them are clueless about these things.

Thumbs up op. I pray I get a very nice n caring future hubby jst like u

What a lovely, supporting and understanding write up! Seriously, men need to understand that pregnancy is another phase of women's lives and men need to be supportive and caring. Men ure doing yourselves so much good if can do what d op has written. It is well with our homes.

Beautiful thread OP

God bless your home

Nice thread, especially for the first baby... But I'm telling you, by baby no 3+... All the niceties go out the window lol...

You're both grateful to have a full night sleep once the other children are in bed!

Running after the kids is a full-time exercise.

I'd say more but I think it's self-explanatory

Wow.... I wish more men will learn, unlike my former neighbour who doesn't care if his wife is tired, restless or hungry, aal he wants is food on the dinning table any he's hungry.

My husband is trying but sometimes him dey escape, him go say "baby abeg jst try help me cook today na"

It's really nice when you have a supportive husband when you are pregnant.

Wow.... I wish more men will learn, unlike my former neighbour who doesn't care if his wife is tired, restless or hungry, allhe wants is food on the dinning table any he's hungry.

My husband is trying but sometimes him dey escape, him go say "baby abeg jst try help me cook today na"

It's really nice when you have a supportive husband when you are pregnant.

lastnogood:
Nice thread, especially for the first baby... But I'm telling you, by baby no 3+... All the niceties go out the window lol...

You're both grateful to have a full night sleep once the other children are in bed!

Running after the kids is a full-time exercise.

I'd say more but I think it's self-explanatory

Lolz... Only time would tell o...

Thanks anyway...

anthoniaz:
Wow.... I wish more men will learn, unlike my former neighbour who doesn't care if his wife is tired, restless or hungry, allhe wants is food on the dinning table any he's hungry.

My husband is trying but sometimes him dey escape, him go say "baby abeg jst try help me cook today na"

It's really nice when you have a supportive husband when you are pregnant.

Funny....especially @ your husband...

Once the husband is supportive (and present) and the wife is cooperative and submissive, the whole walk could be soooooo sweet and smooth...

#Teamsupportyourwives...

totally agree

pretydiva:
Thumbs up op. I pray I get a very nice n caring future hubby jst like u

love ya post , op

TONYE001:


Funny....especially @ your husband...

Once the husband is supportive (and present) and the wife is cooperative and submissive, the whole walk could be soooooo sweet and smooth...

#Teamsupportyourwives...

Yeah.

TONYE001:
Hello Nairalanders, greetings to you all. How are you? I trust that everything is going on well with you all.

Today I would love us to talk about the role of the husband in pregnancy. I’ll be writing from MY experience as a husband to a pregnant wife.

Before we go on, below are some key points:

1. I’ll be writing from the perspective of a Christian though this piece is NOT limited to Christians,

2. I have arranged this work into three parts. Each part represents a trimester,

3. Parts II and III would come up later,

4. The intention of the writer is to share thoughts with fellow fathers-to-be (and fathers) as well as to educate the general public.

PART I

Amongst the numerous reasons for marriage is procreation. It is the dream of every man and woman to have a child (or children as the case may be). I remember those days when I was much younger. While my mates discussed football, wrestling and martial arts; while they concentrated on their careers and how to make millions in the future, I sat and fantasized on how to be a husband and a father at the earliest possible time. Not that I didn’t share the same interests as my friends but the fact is that, perhaps, there is nothing I want more than being a “family man”.

The statement, “darling, I’m pregnant”, often times, marks the beginning of the path of pregnancy. However, I think “WE are pregnant” is better because it makes obvious the fact that responsibilities in pregnancy are to be shared and not necessarily limited to the wife.

So, your darling wife is pregnant and there are celebrations everywhere. The atmosphere is saturated with celebrations and jubilations. Your shoulders are raised and your expectations are high; perhaps you may have bought the pregnancy test strips to confirm, confirm, and confirm again. Maybe you are itching to observe your first ultrasound scan to see your baby (or babies), to hear that tiny heart in your wife’s womb beat rapidly. You just can’t wait to hold your tender baby in your hands. I understand the joy because I’ve been there; it is truly a period of extended euphoria.

Fathers-to-be must note that pregnancy is a phase that one must pass through before the arrival of a child. There is no shortcut; it is impossible to jump from the time of conception to the time of delivery. Between these two defined times are lots of activities, lots of dos and lots of don’ts. If all the laws are abided by, it is almost certain that the end would draw smiles on your faces.

Certain changes in pregnant women are physiological and expected; some are temporal while others may be permanent. Let us see some of these changes:

CHANGES YOUR WIFE MAY UNDERGO WHILE SHE IS IN HER FIRST TRIMESTER

1. Tiredness: This is one of the first changes observed in pregnant women. This is physiological and psychological. Ordinarily, the presence of a foetus in your wife’s womb imposes stress on her body. The relationship between the mother and the foetus is analogous to what is observed in commensalism where one organism benefits from the other without causing harm to the host. The foetus relies on the mother for nutrition, defence (about 70-80%, or more), eradication of wastes, etc. This is an extra stress on the mother because her body, originally, is programmed to cater for itself alone but now, the game is changed as there is another entity within to provide for. Disturbances of the hormone, progesterone, during pregnancy is also associated with fatigue.

Your wife’s psychology may also be a contributing factor to her tiredness. She is aware she is pregnant. She thinks of the “pregnancy” and the associated risks, she thinks of the pains of labour. Never underestimate the things women hear and read when it comes to pregnancy. The information she is exposed to may instil fear in her and fear is stressful while stress is tiring!

2. Loss of Appetite: This could be frustrating to the husband. The things you know your wife likes, those things you always get her as you return home may become repulsive rather than appealing. My wife was a fan of gizzard. Gizzard was almost always present in our stews but now, things have changed. The sight of gizzard can kill her appetite for an entire day! Things are that bad.

3. Mood Swings: This is very important because if not well understood, it could cause problems in your home. Your wife may switch from one mood to the other in a matter of minutes. 10:51AM: Happy! 10:52AM: Unexplained sadness. 10:53AM: Angry! 10:54AM: Leave-me-alone! The list is endless.

4. Return of Appetite: Yea, you read that right. Mr. Appetite may actually return to the Kingdom of Pregnancy in this story. And this time around, he may come HEAVY. Later in the first trimester, your wife’s appetite may return. Sometimes, my wife eats her dinner in three phases – Dinner Phase 1, Phase 2, and Phase 3. I’m not talking about multiple eating of small bits of food, no. That appetite scares me sometimes.

5. Food Craving: Of all the changes associated with pregnancy, I find this one the funniest. My mother-in-law once told me that in one of her pregnancies, she always traveled a journey of about 20 minutes in search of agidi. Funny, isn’t it? This is true in most pregnancies. Before now, my wife’s best soup was Afang Soup but now, she can go any extent to get her newly found love – Okra Soup! She doesn’t care about meat or fish. All she needs is her okra, palm oil and some spices and food is ready. She is that serious with the soup.

6. Sleep: The body refreshes itself when we sleep. You should expect a lot of this in the first trimester of your wife’s pregnancy especially if she has a lot of free times. I love to watch my wife sleep. Sometimes, I sit next to her and watch her thorax rise and fall in response to her breathing. How peaceful!

7. Restlessness: You may call this sleeplessness. Your pregnant wife may spend about an hour in search of a “comfortable sleep posture” as she rolls from one side of the bed to the other. Sometimes, her breathing may be disturbed too. This may be due to the fact that her consciousness may have taken over the autonomic control of her respiration. When we consciously breathe, it is almost impossible to conduct gaseous exchange at the right rate and amount. It is also tiring to consciously breathe in and out repeatedly. This is why respiration, majorly, is regulated at the autonomic level.

8. Weight Gain: Most times, there is a significant gain of weight in pregnancy. In the first trimester however, weight gain may not be obvious but this does not mean that it is absent. There is a visible enlargement of body components. Your wife’s habits and genetic composition may influence her weight gain.

There are many other changes that I may not have listed above. This is why you should comment and share your thoughts because the list of changes associated with pregnancy knows no end; it varies from woman to woman.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

As a husband of a pregnant wife, there are specific roles you must play. Your wife needs support – all kinds of support – and she needs it real bad! It is not enough to get her pregnant and wait for the day of delivery. An ideal husband is a husband that follows his wife through pregnancy, step by step and from stage to stage.

In my next post, I would take you on a ride through some important roles a husband must play in his wife’s pregnancy.

….to be continued.

From your posts, it is obvious that you adore your wife. She's the Centre of your Universe. God bless your home and God will help you keep being a good husband

''He who finds a wife, finds a good thing''...

A man must never fail to acknowledge his wife every time he gets that good thing...