brownie10:
For people who think I am ignoring the real problem while focusing on the other girls, let me tell you this.
I was the woman who believed in being classy. No touching of your partner's phones. No unnecessary anything.

If you recall earlier, I said there was a single incidence I should have investigated.

Well, I got some anonymous calls and texts and this was before the wedding.

This person wanted to talk to me and show me some proofs 'that something was going on between them' as the person put it but no, I waved it all off. I believed whatever discussion i would be having would be between my fiance and I. That I had no business with her but rather it is with him I have business.

So I was very cold with this person on the call. Because I sounded so put-together and even jeered at her, this person dropped the call angrily but still proceeded to send text messages.

It was my man I called and darn, did all my coolness drop. He denied of course. He denied and told me that was the case of a hater who was pissed because he had been flaunting me on social media. Even some of his own called me and told me there was nothing to fear.

If only I had been like some smart women who give a listening ear to the other party. But no more o. I hold the two of them responsible. My husband moreso. But I am reserving the names Ill call him to his hearing and he will hear every single one!! As for them, Ill call them whatever I deem fit here. Since they are not available.

keppyy:
You took an oath in church and it says "Till death do us (you and your hubby) part"...

That's an oath before the sacred altar of God and the world...

Whatever you feel like doing, please do but note that divorce is not an option...

fellis:






SMMFH

charles316:


I have read all fem29 wrote and found nothing absurd in it. Do you guys (u and flyca) want her to advice the op to leave her marriage? All these happened before they got married.

We all have our bad past. What will your future husband do if he finds a tape of that your ex putting his D!ck inside your vaginer and you moaning like a goat? I'm sure you will say that it all happened before marriage. Or are you two virgins?

focus7:
whatever happen, do your best to win your man to yourself. Don't pick up a fight with, sought out a way with him to break away from the ladies outside . What my wife did then was that first, she didn't pretend not discover something, two she was willing to make it a secret between us and it is till date except that am sharing it now, third she was ready to reason, understand and assist me come out. She call the ladies not quarrel with them but counsel them and make them see the consequent. But most importantly she ensured she didn't lose me to them, she team up with me.

senier007:

Well like I said earlier we choose how to live and how to live it, what may be seen private to you might not be seen as "private " to another person, the only road to succesfull marriage is to always ask for permission not to be sniffing around looking for something that you don't even know how to handle it, take for instance your wife checked your messages and saw tones of text from other woman not a single reply from you, how do think she will take it? Majority of women will think you were flirting with all the women, if you said no she will ask you how did they manage to get your number? As if it's a rocket science to get number and in actual sense those women are looking for way to get into your life but u shut them up in your own way by not replying them. Keeping secret is bad in any relationship same as sniffing into ones private things without permission, if there is nothing private in marriage why is your wife not aware of your bank acc digits? Am yet to see any man that will indulge all his secrets to his wife, including his worthness. I will advise women and men to be patient with their partners and never have the notion that you own your partner, a wise husband will always try to keep his wife away from depression, sadness by keeping things he did but in the past and present that will hurt her private in as much as she will be safe from not knowing.

kandiikane:


Oh ok, redeeming qualities cancels out the fact that he is a cheat? Nice one! I see you, as long as he is looking after me, he can phuck as many women as he likes, I will just pretend to give him a slap on the wrist.. Should have just said it, instead of beating about the bush.

Stillfire:


That's the average Nigerian female mentality. You are only doing yourself a disservice by participating in conversations with resilient, die-hard masochistic women. They would soon start quoting the bible to argue why you should die in pain. The bible says God will not give us what we cannot bear/handle. Nigerian women can handle pain, hurt, disloyalty from their men , that's why God gifts them all three in their marriages.

fem29:


I hope you are not referring to me

brownie10:


my only choice would be to check into a hotel. but as it is, ill be at work tomorrow and he'd come embarrass me there with apologies or wait after work and follow to know where i am.

SirShymexx:


Fem Fel, I just read the thread now and initially I wasn't going to post a comment. However, you're much more bigger than these blinkered chicken heads - don't drag yourself down to their level. The prepubescent mongrel who quoted you with unwarranted insults doesn't even know anything about life - she's a teenager. While the rest are just bitter hags who can't find a man.

Learn to ignore them - it's not worth it. These pillocks just want to force their miserable lives on everyone, and they can't reason beyond their nostrils and accept the fact that everyone was cut from different clothes and raised differently, in different environments, with different experiences. So outlook to life is always going to differ.

bellong:
When you should confront your demon, you are here crying foul.

I don't know what you want from people, to cry with you?

Nonso23:
Saturday night drama

Well marriage is for better for worse and besides technically he didn't cheat on you.
He wasn't married when these sexcapades were recorded na
He only fornicated and that is a matter between just him and his God.
If it were adultery then he is answerable to you -- if he wants to be sha

Just keep being the loving wife you have always been. Your reward is in heaven.

fem29:


Thanks my Ijebu bro , we may not always see eye to eye, but u got my back.

The OPs husband no try sha. I don't know how she can continue the marriage after seeing all that

njokusboy:
Let it be clear 0p, you can just divorce ur husband and move on with your life....
Or you can forgive him and pretend it never happened and hope he's repented...


One last thing, seek a marriage counsellor with experience, most women here have never had to deal with a cheating spouse before or are even single.. they have no valuable advise to render, they won't even be able to advice themselves if they were in your shoes... Am assuming your story is true, they don't have the answers you seek here...

SirShymexx:


Lol. I don't even care about the story cos I don't care about other people's stories/relationships/marriages on here. There are always three sides to every story - the two involved (one story each) and the truth. So making judgement and trying to advise folks is always silly, when you don't know everything involved. And from personal experience, getting third parties involved in relationships always mess things up further. Regardless, I like what you said about professional help cos with that, both sides would be able to tell it as it's with no holds barred.

Anyway, I gatts look out for my Ijebu Queens. I'm the wayward son of an Ijebu merchant (on these sides) and I don't like seeing my women get into unnecessary fights. For me, shooting slugs at disrespectful fvckers is my therapy and fun cos I'm built for the comic relief I get off it.

Just keep doing you. You're a big woman with a good heart, a decent family, and kids - don't let these internet frauds get into ya head. You have got some little chic who can't even afford to buy her own panties getting involved in what's out of her depth. And other folks who're more or less synonymous with internet homo thugs - thinking they run a gang on here. Don't waste your precious time on them - a lot of them are sociopaths and they need fresh air in the real world. Don't waste ya time on folks like that.

Happy Sunday, my Ijebu sister - and shouts to all the great dads and husbands out there on this father's day.

I'm out!

brownie10:
In the other video, the girl comes into view wrapped in our towel. He asks her if she was ok and she sat beside him and nodded. Next, he pulled off the towel and they started. Almost 27 minutes of different styles and positions (just like the first).

Then she lay on the seat with the towel over her breathing heaavily like the PIG she is. Dirty pig with dirty armpits!!

When she was getting dressed, he asked her to chill a bit, that he wanted to go pick up some things from town that instead of dropping her and coming to the house and leaving again, that they should both leave at once. That since she had closed from work. I didnt hear her reply.

But wait for this. The basta! took his phone and dialed me! Telling me he called to check on me and I should let him know when I get home.

Hmmmmmmnnn, be still my poor heart.

Acidosis:
No surprises here


Most women marry strangers. They want to know his attitude and personality in SHOPRITE, BEACH, OZONE, & KFC.

Stillfire:


You know we Nigerian subservient wives have to plot and weakly present our case to the husband after serving him a whopping meal. You don't just go and 'confront a man.' I just hope she does not channel the anger to the housemaid or gateman in the meantime.

Nonso23:


Ehmm
First of all, I am a Nigerian and more importantly. I am a Nigerian Man.
Remember this song "to be a man is not a day's job..."
Na her papa house we dey go straight. I must get a refund for my bad investment.

Seriously though, I know the last thing I would do is bring the matter here for strangers to dissect. First thing first, She must give me an explanation, (why brownie10 hasn't requested for one from her DH still baffles me) whether I will continue with the marriage or not afterwards should be clear by now.

I don't do mushy mushy love o. My love dey calculate balance sheet and socioeconomic viability.

funlord:

What kind of" _stupid, half baked, african magic tried and tested story is this?" In fact I wish you ill op! This is toilet material!

Acidosis:
No surprises here


Most women marry strangers. They want to know his attitude and personality in SHOPRITE, BEACH, OZONE, & KFC.

bukatyne:
Trust NL male hypocrites to be here

See How lessons on forgiveness and vow keeping are flying left, right centre.

I am trying to remember who coined the phrase... never make a hoe an housewife. Who would be kind enough to remind me?

Is This not a case of don't make a dog a husband

Bloody bloody hypocrites

@OP:

The first step is confronting your husband. Anyhow you like.
Perhaps This talking here helps you better.

Goodluck with whatever decision you make.

Cheers.

brownie10:


My relationship with him was very OK up till today. We pray together most times. He is caring. He opens doors sometimes, he pulls out chairs sometimes. He sometimes even cooks when Im at work for us, because though he is better paid, he has wayyyy more time than i do. Just last evening, he came to pick me after work and we went for a date.

Even now, he has gone out to get some things for the house. He was on my neck that we should go together but I just asked him to go ahead while I cook. He could sense something was amiss as he turned and asked me if something was wrong just after he stepped out of the door. He wears his wedding band proudly.

Acidosis:
No surprises here
Most women marry strangers. They want to know his attitude and personality in SHOPRITE, BEACH, OZONE, & KFC.

Stillfire:


That's the average Nigerian female mentality. You are only doing yourself a disservice by participating in conversations with resilient, die-hard masochistic women. They would soon start quoting the bible to argue why you should die in pain. The bible says God will not give us what we cannot bear/handle. Nigerian women can handle pain, hurt, disloyalty from their men , that's why God gifts them all three in their marriages.

5minsmadness:

Very true words right there!

They have no problem going to these places but will open threads of hypocrisy when the man tells them to "come to my house"

brownie10:


If this story is a lie. Then may this happen to me and may this be my portion.

But if it is not, then may this evil befall you a 1000 times over. May you know the kind of pain I am currently feeling! MAy you cry for help and no one comes to your aid!

AMEN!!!!