I am some 36 year old lady who is supposedly married to a 'born again' brother. Here goes my story: I come from a broken home and hence made a vow when I was young, I would date no one until after my university studies. This vow I kept til my 3rd year in the university. I gave my life to Christ by end of my first year at the University. By the second year, I had already grown more committed to the xtian teachings and had subsequently gone deep into all the normal rules 'born again' xtians were to keep i.e. dont be unequally yoked with unbelievers etc. So by my 3rd year in the university, I met this brother in Lagos through his girlfriend who introduced him to me. His girlfriend and I were members of the same fellowship while he was in another fellowship. Shortly after the introduction however, he changed church and started coming to the fellowship I attended with his girlfriend. He asked to be paying me visits at home which I agreed to as we brethren often paid one another visits anyway, including the pastors of the church and I saw nothing wrong in it. His girlfriend knew where to meet him sometimes when he had forgotten about their appointments. In the process of coming to sit at my house, we got talking about several issues including sharing my fears of marriage and the kind of man I would like to marry with him. There were times he tried to get personal i.e. offered me some gifts and I refused, seizing those opportunities to ask him what he really wanted from me and he denied having any erotic thots towards me, so I was trusting, believed him and soon let the suspicions rest.
About a year after I had met him though, he sent me a letter throu his brother explaning how God had shown him in a trance I was his wife. I accepted his proposal even thou I did not like him and was not attracted to him in anyway, thinking perhaps God wanted to test my resolve not to have a boyfriend until after my studies against His own will and becos they always preached to us to surrender everything about us to God. I had my doubts about him nevertheless as he was an exact opposite of whom I said I would marry. I took a counsel from another supposed 'born again' xtian sister who told me her pastor sees visions to help me pray about him and the reply she came back with was positive, so this drew all my initial fears away and above all, my mother accepted him and encouraged the relationship.
I gave this brother after this all my best. He comes from  a poor background and had no job for more than 6years after graduation. His problem automatically became my mother and I. He ate his meals at our place, got money to spend and move around from us and my mother took him to all her known contacts for job placements which he never scaled through any interview thou.
My problem with this brother now is since we married (almost 10 years now), with the many opportunities that have come our way, I have never seen him save money. He is ever broke and goes about either selling things at home or borrowing from pple all over. If he sees money on me, he causes trouble and says I have been using him to save money (he sometimes pays the house rent, but everyother thing left is my responsibility including providing for our 2 kids). He is a very laid back person in xter. He prefers to sit on youtube and watch films rather than find something meaningful doing with his time. Everywhere he has been opportuned to work in the past, they always end up chasing him away becos he is very quarrelsom. This was the same tougues speaking brother that was even annointed a pastor in our fellowship then. He never allowed me get angry for a second before begging me and chased me all over to my distant university to the remote state I was posted to for my NYSC. At the slightest provocation, he shouts I should pack my things and leave him alone. He started making that his national anthem since the 2nd year of marriage becos he asked me for money then and I told him I had none. He went straight to my mother and chanted that anthem to her.
I feel like leaving now becos he recently became violet also. There was a time I had an arguement with him and he resorted beating me up in front of our visitor. There is basically no humiliation I have not experienced from this guy.
Now I feel this 'born again' thing has really misled me. I remember all the things I ought to have weighed this brother's marriage, proposal then on assuming it was a worldly proposal with not xtian sentiments i.e. one or two of his siblings are mentally unbalanced and his family are really wreached and there are nine children with two of his siblings dying in quick succession etc
I feel trapped now becos all the years I have worked, I pumped all the money into this man believing like the xtian sister told me he shall be a successful man. I don't have savings, I cant go back to my mum cos she leaves with my step-father (her husband). My dad is no go area becos he warned me about this guy and I refused to heed his advise thinking he was judging his future on the basis of the guy's background.
I need your advise all as am practically running crazy.

i alwayz say be careful about this born again this, born again dat and visions by them

if you r tired, leave b4 u die

Wow! I read the whole thing!

Since you have kids, it may be difficult to consider divorce.

Swallow ur pride, forget your fears and go to your Dad before it's to late. You have kids, and while your mum might be anxious to help or ask you to sit tight, you know better. if he's started beating you, trust me when i say your dad will support you fully. You strike me as a sensible person, so I'll say this, use your head. The answers that we want from God, he gives us WHEN WE PRAY TO HIM. Don't let people deceive you! In essence, even though ur decision might seem like a tough one, you will know in your heart that it's the right one. The person you've described is not a Man and deserves the opportunity to find out what he wants from life, on his own! some people are used to leaching of others but some learn to be different,  he hasn't seen the support of marriage as an avenue for growth so you need to move on, or in the next 20 yrs you'll be telling the same story. You deserve a second chance, with the hope that you've learnt that things in life are'nt always clear cut, and we always need to think and make decisions with (1) God, (2) our Head and lastly (3) our Heart.

I should also point out, that you could leave this guy and it will be the wake up call he needs to be successful, but that has nothing to do with you staying, cos you could stay, and he will continue to be useless. Life isn't fair but we all get our piece of the pie, eventually, and not from the avenues we expect.
Good luck and God bless!

This is another product of wrong doctrines and practices. I am also a christian, but I can never allow any vision or dream to direct/ulter my life. What is the guarantee dat the vision came from God?

Now, what will I say? If u are still a professing christian, then divorce isn't d best option, but seperation is strongly adviced cos of physical violence. Go back to ur dad, ask for forgiveness and let him step in.

Take heart dear sista. I cant tell u things will be easy, but there is hope. God bless!

Hun, i agree with ezinne1212, swallow ur pride and go to your dad before this man ends up hurting you, or even killing you. you need to put urself and ur kids as a top priority, you have done all u can for this man you call ur husband, u owe him nothing, but u owe ur kids the right to be alive. don't let any man take that away from you. you need to leave before it is too late, i've heard too many stories about women who stick to men that beat them up and just use them, all in the name of he will change, and hunny that ain't gonna happen, once a man has a chance to hit u, he always will. and u need to get out before he hurts u or you snap. please. this is really serious

I really don't know what the problem exactly is with so called professing christians.Does being a Christians prevents us from using our Heads?I have said and would always say that no man or any woman is particularly meant for any man or woman.If you didn't get married to this man, some other pewrsons would have been married to him and you also would have been married to some other persons, and ultimately, both of you would have been happen not married to one another.
Within christendom, particularly penticostal churches, there is an existence of monumental deception or frauddulent marriages.You would see a lazy brother seeing vision that God told him to marry a very hard working sister,also you would see a very lady sister who never took time out to develop her self academically seing revelation to get married to a man who had worked so hard to develop himself.In the past finding your partner in the church you worship works real good but these days, it is the highest form of marital fraud ever seen.
In your situation,I can not ask you to leave your husband neither can I ask you to stay.When your dad was warning you, you took his advice for granted.your common sense also told you but you refused to listen,Now you have to be the one to take up ur own decision.People just don't learn,,,Truly as the saying goes, a broken relationship is better than a broken marriage.Am sure you would be wishing you did not get married to this guy now.Next time and everything you do in life, use ur head first then you could ask God for help in prayers.Don't ever under estimate what your head tells you again.

thanks you all for all those wonderful pieces of advise. I feel not so alone anymore with them coming in.

With kids involved, I know it's not easy. However, you can not continue to live like this. I believe he has passed the boundary when he laid his hands on you. he is no longer a man. He obviously does not respect you, especially considering all you have done for him.

Personally I am always suspicious of this "Born again" thing. A lot of people just do it for cover up. And all that vision they they are telling you about is just plain crap! Okay, you are a devoted Christian. However, you should not let that prevent you from using common sense and making prudent decisions.


Best of luck to you.

@Poster

Sorry my sister. This is a hard one, but luckily all the replies you have recieved are sensible, intelligent ones. Please take the advice you have been given. I am also pretty sure that you knew what to do before posting and just needed clarification. Well you have it.

Your husbands attitude is one that appears to have been bred from a careless upbringing. He is in a very comfortable situation, one that most men and women would be very happy to be in. He is so ungrateful to the point where he can physically assault you rather than be thankful to you for putting up with this situation for 6 years.

Even without the hand-outs given to him by you and your mother all these years, physically assaulting you is just disrepectful and completely unacceptable. And in front of visitors, ?? What is that??

Make yourself a plan first

a) Where are you and the kids going to live, and how will the three of you be catered for:
b) Start saving every penny of money you can, he may start arguments with you, but you are on a mission, so keep focused on that
c) Make a quick list of emergency friends:places that you and the kids can go to if things get out of hand
d) Please talk to your mum and dad, ask your mum about the best way to approach your dad. Dont worry about how he will behave at first, he will get over it. Just make sure he knows that you are not just upset about your husbands behaviour, but also worried about the safety of you and the children.


For your own piece of mind, and your kids too, you must seperate yourself from the situation, dont wait for something life-threating to happen before you do something about it.

Peace.

.

You see where these over the top useless Born again fake Christians get you! They act like they are sinless.

Look lady I suggest you run to Daddy ASAP he will be angry and say I told you so but at the end of the day he loves you because you are his child.
I laughed and almost cried when I read the bit about him beating you up infront of a guest is this guy deraged?

At the end of the day we can talk but its your decision.

I wish you all the best.

tpia:

mistake #1


mistake #2

Yeah, you were right it was a mistake. i guess i was such a fool becos i had newly given my life to Christ and the teachings were like so very different. we were told we born agains think alike and are the ones that would make heaven while the rest are sinners and unbelievers. also taught to us was the need to be dead to the flesh and do the will of God. So you can imagine how all these teachings convinced me an average born again is like me with the same beliefs system, heavenly bound and a saint. i never knew pple could be that desperate as to start faking all these and even using thé name of God to woo girls. then what with all those tougues speaking. committment to the things of God and church titles he had. Honestly with all those, I thot he was a good xtian and so I believed such a 'saint' must definitely be hearing from God.

tpia:
Dont know if this is a mistake or not, but you're the one marrying him, not your mom

.

But my mum is a graduate and had chased guys away from me in the past. she also was very particular about the kinds of company my siblings keep with pple of the opposite sex, so of course i thot if she would accept the 'brother', it means he was not as bad as my flesh was telling me. i still feel she misled me becos her acceptance finally sealed the whole deal and i allowed the brother to grow on me. meanwhile, like i said, my father was against it from the very onset. but for the fact that i lived with my mother and not my father and the two of them had a strained relationship anyway, i held more allegiance to my mother and so i listened to her advise more. also becos i felt my father had not always been there for me.

tpia:
Everyone makes different mistakes in life, and I'm not trying to make you feel bad for marrying him, but surely there was something you saw and liked about him initially regardless of the born again sisters and pastors egging you on. And who was this girlfriend you mentioned? Did he dump her for you? Besides, mistake or no mistake, there are kids involved now.

believe me when i said i never did like this guy. i agreed to his proposal purely on xtianity grounds and nothing more. i thot as a xtian, doing the will of God was more paramount than wanting to satisfy your own fleshy desires. and with all the other prophesies and my mother's and siblings acceptance, that sealed it more for me. i also thot afterall he is a graduate and he is not handicapped in anyway i.e. meaning it is not exactly my taste, but he is not the worst either becos of the above reasons i have just highlighted. and of course i learned to tolerate him becos he was always running after me, and always ready to say sorry and beg me at any sign i was hurt or unhappy. so i thot, if he could be this humble and like me so much, why not just stick him and grow to like him in return?
as to his then girlfriend, he actually did dump her for me. when i asked him why, he told me the or pastor was he that advised him the girl was not fit for him and he should so look for another (the girl had no schl cert at that time while he was on the verge of rounding off his programme at unilag). although they come from the same state (delta) and share similarities of background.

tpia:
May I also ask why you're suddenly fed after 10 years of marriage? Has he been beating you before or is it a one time thing in which case you may want to try to see if your marriage can be saved though it looks hard.

the hitting is a recent development. maybe it just started becos i changed my attitude to him recently too. i put up with all his readiness to use the bible to deceive me for the first 6 years of marriage and readily believed anything he said. but after all those prophesies and promises of his never came to pass, i started questioning if God could actually be speaking to him as he says. and then this xteristic traits portrays contrary to what he professes. of course i wised up and stopped believing his lies nor give him my money. tension naturally built up as a result and the aurguements became more as i told him; enough of those bible quotes and let me for the first time use my head as am a graduate for God sake. that was when it started. the first time he hit me was in 2007. he did it again in 2008 and living in europe, the neigbours heard the shouts and called the police ( we eventually pretended to them it was a mere auguement and they left). but it is 2009 now and he seems to be growing wider.

tpia:
And you know many people will see this:

tpia:
and say it runs in the family. Thats no reason to stay with an abusive man, but make sure you weigh the situation carefully and prayerfully if possible.

exactly why i have stayed in it this long. i really wanted my own story to be different and i know it would have been if the born again thing had not misled me. i so kept my self and never had a boyfriend until i met him. he remains my first date til now. i kept my self til marriage. i feel hurt, this is my reward for all those years of denying myself.

tpia:
if you knew all this before getting married then it shouldnt matter too much now. At least its been 10 or so years and the main danger according to what you said here, is the man himself not his siblings or his poor family.

i made reference to his family becos with all these xter traits, now i understand why the family is like that. loads of his siblings are also like this and only a handful are doing well. his brother was a top management staff in a financial institution for years and the moment he resigned his appointment, he was exposed. all the flashy livesyle could not be maintained and he had to move out of his gbadada estate duplex to a one room apartment somewhere. my hubby was even the one sending him money to feed until now i heard he is gotten another employment. how could one had earned millions in salary for several years and saved nothing, but went from grace to grass in less than a year without employement? does this not show it is a family thing? this is just and example, but most of them are this way.
they were not so apparent things in his family before i married him becos this particular brother of his was doing fine and he fact used to pass on his cars (as a man. staff, his official cars eventually become his once he is promoted and given another) to his brothers. he in fact was a beneficiary of such a gesture shortly before i married him. also he had another brother doing so fine and working with diamond bank. then two others of his siblings were at d university; one reading law and the other pols science then. so i just sized them up to mean althou they come from a very wrechead beginning, but they seem to be growing. it was after i married him that the short lived success of his eldest brother became exposed. the other one supposedly doing law at unilag had been rusticated but lived on campus anyway to fool his family he was studying and the truth was only known years after he claimed to have graduated! etc

tpia:
Have you sat him down to ask how the marriage can be saved, or if he himself wants a separation. If he's fooling around outside then you may have to start considering your options.

someone that results to shouting if you try to talk to him in any way? i can't hold an intelligent conversation with him for that is where the violence or arguement starts and the moment you have a view contrary to his, automatically the shouting and abuses start!

ravenesque:

@Poster

Sorry my sister. This is a hard one, but luckily all the replies you have recieved are sensible, intelligent ones. Please take the advice you have been given. I am also pretty sure that you knew what to do before posting and just needed clarification. Well you have it.

Your husbands attitude is one that appears to have been bred from a careless upbringing. He is in a very comfortable situation, one that most men and women would be very happy to be in. He is so ungrateful to the point where he can physically assault you rather than be thankful to you for putting up with this situation for 6 years.

Even without the hand-outs given to him by you and your mother all these years, physically assaulting you is just disrepectful and completely unacceptable. And in front of visitors, ?? What is that??

Make yourself a plan first

a) Where are you and the kids going to live, and how will the three of you be catered for:
b) Start saving every penny of money you can, he may start arguments with you, but you are on a mission, so keep focused on that
c) Make a quick list of emergency friends:places that you and the kids can go to if things get out of hand
d) Please talk to your mum and dad, ask your mum about the best way to approach your dad. Dont worry about how he will behave at first, he will get over it. Just make sure he knows that you are not just upset about your husbands behaviour, but also worried about the safety of you and the children.


For your own piece of mind, and your kids too, you must seperate yourself from the situation, dont wait for something life-threating to happen before you do something about it.

Peace.

there it was the thing i actually call my greatest mistake came in. born againism actually made me ignore all i needed to have considered before agreeing to his proposal saying all those things are worldly and fleshy considerations. but we should be heavenly and not canally minded, but dead to the flesh!

now i realise, being born again does not change a man's attitude and upbringing. it is totally false and a big falacy. the family you come from is one of the determinants of the kinds of traits/attitudes you as a person have.

My sister,i read ur story and i did wept for you because i cannot imagine what you are going tru, Anyways it is too late to cry over a spilled milk.I will not endorsed divorce no matter what because what God has joined together let no man should put asunder. Take all this burden to God in prayers ,do not seek friends (born again or not ) and pastor to pray for you , Go on your knees yourself and seek God face for solution. .All advise and counsels of human never works when it comes to marriage for reasons no one can explaines. Do not let this evil behaviour of this brother make faith withers in God. It is o.k to let your daddy knows what you are going tru as theis will lift ur mind when you share a problem. Cheeers

Girl, beleive me when i was in school, i attended this so called bornagain fellowship and beleive they showed me sege, The things that happen their honey? God forgive me. i cant even begin to mention them here.

The bible says "by their fruits (character), you shall know them not prophecy, title, position or tongues. A man that could not save, get a good job, he was oh so unbalanced in some ways and yet he deceived you. I dont blame you dear at all because when i was there i made some mistakes too because i was very naive. I beleived everythig they said but thank God i escaped the marriage thing.

My sister has a friend who was dating this so called brother, he speaks in tongues, preaches and does almost everything but he showed her sege. He was stingy and he used to  report her to every body in church whenever they have a misunderstanding. He so much defamed her that she had to leave the church. Do you know the worst  part, he left her and started asking my sister out not knowing my sister knew everything that was going on (my sis used to attend the church too but left because of these vision thing because it caused a lot of drama and tore so may friends apart. at times seven people will say they saw one sister in a vision, i wonder if God will show one person to seven guys)

Myy sister so much lashed him that he could not come back.

please, please and please for those that are not married yet, be extremely careful about this vision thing, it has caused so much damage .

My dear, if the battery continues ( a bornagain beating his wife, i fear) , i will advise you plan your strategy and leave with your children. Beleive me, you may say , you have children but it is if you are alive that you can take care of your children, dont let him kill you before your time. If he dosent continue to batter you , then you can pray to God to change him. I beleive he will see you through.

Dear Superjet,
you have been through a lot.sorry dear. I do understand where you are coming from because i was also surrounded by a number of christian sisters in university, who made strange comments like yours- "not liking someone yet believing it is the will of God", it sounds ridiculous to someone(including me) who has not been in these type of christian settings before.

So you have made a huge mistake.Give yourself some time to CRY, heal, trust God and move on. I am sure you will find loads of advice regarding how to pick up yourself and move on in the family section. In addition spend time getting to know yourself again.what do you like to do-sports, music, dance etc do those things well, they will make you happy and keep your mind occupied, you will heal faster that way also. Remember that you can only make yourself happy, no one else can do that, once you are happy, your chilren will be happy. Life is only once, dont continue to live a gloomy life.

warm regards

when it was time to choose a man, you knew he was no good for you but chose to follow what that "pastor", fellow sister and other christians advised you on,
so follow your faith and accept your predicament and believe that it was gods choice. 10 yrs down the line, you are looking for answers. go to church, pray and pray some more. if you stuck by that man for +10yrs already, a lifetime with that looser is not going to be a problem for you.
to each their own

@poster

dont blame d pastor,sisters in the lord,and d church,blame urself for d mistake u made,did the church force u to marry,or does being a born again xtian make one dumb and foolish?if u claimed to be a born again xtian why DIDNT YOU,I MEAN YOU SEEK THE FACE OF THE LORD AND SEE IF HE WAS THE ONE FOR YOU,please spare me madam

tHE CHURCH D PASTOR MY TINY ASS,since others claimed dat he was urs.why didnt u find out by urself since u r also a born again xtian like them

a born again so he claimed,ur spirit rejected him,still u went ahead to marry him,r d pastors or sister in d lord going to be d ones living wt u?r u getting married to them?why didnt u ask other pastors instead of going thru d short cut like using a sister,since u wanted them to confirm if he's urs,u sit down there person do rubbish msg for u,u come dey make noise,story
im a born again my self,i have my pastors,dat did not make me stupid when i was choosing,when i met my man i knew immediately dat dis was d person i wanted to spend my life wt,i did not wait for any pastor or friend to give me d go ahead,i prayed myself and got the good feelings i wanted and dat made me do ahead in d first place

enoff of d pity u r getting from dis thread abegiiii as if u r d only born again xtian

Ameo no 1,

Take it easy, she has been thru enof already and what she is getting here is not pity, its advice.

I f a child goofs, you use one hand to spank him and the other to bring him back, we are allhumans and we all make mistakes. She did not delibrately enter into it. I pray that God sees her through it all.

sparta like i care?

infact she shouldnt blame any pastor or whoever d whole blame is on her,so if her pastors or sista in d lord tell her that God said she should kill her enemies or drown in a river she will right?afterall it is a vision from God

100% of wat hapened is her fault,she has d whole blame,let her carry it alone and stop sharing it to pple

like seriously i dont care if u pple see me as rude,i really dont care,smone has to tell her the bitter and hard truth,and im not going to put sentiments into all dis,i will say it black and white as it is


if a child goofs like u said,yes we spank,shes still on d spanking stage for now

amebo no1.:

sparta like i care?

infact she shouldnt blame any pastor or whoever d whole blame is on her,so if her pastors or sista in d lord tell her that God said she should kill her enemies or drown in a river she will right?afterall it is a vision from God

100% of wat hapened is her fault,she has d whole blame,let her carry it alone and stop sharing it to pple

like seriously i dont care if u pple see me as rude,i really dont care,smone has to tell her the bitter and hard truth,and im not going to put sentiments into all dis,i will say it black and white as it is


if a child goofs like u said,yes we spank,shes still on d spanking stage for now

good you dont care. she is the victim of the slow poison religious nigerian man that  use religion and God to abuse, deceive and manipulate men/God. how do you blame a 26yrs old for not being smart enough to discern a god using man?   we are living in the last days and deception is everywhere.

amebo no1.:

@poster

dont blame d pastor,sisters in the lord,and d church,blame urself for d mistake u made,did the church force u to marry,or does being a born again xtian make one dumb and foolish?if u claimed to be a born again xtian why DIDNT YOU,I MEAN YOU SEEK THE FACE OF THE LORD AND SEE IF HE WAS THE ONE FOR YOU,please spare me madam

tHE CHURCH D PASTOR MY TINY ASS,since others claimed dat he was urs.why didnt u find out by urself since u r also a born again xtian like them

a born again so he claimed,ur spirit rejected him,still u went ahead to marry him,r d pastors or sister in d lord going to be d ones living wt u?r u getting married to them?why didnt u ask other pastors instead of going thru d short cut like using a sister,since u wanted them to confirm if he's urs,u sit down there person do rubbish msg for u,u come dey make noise,story
im a born again my self,i have my pastors,dat did not make me stupid when i was choosing,when i met my man i knew immediately dat dis was d person i wanted to spend my life wt,i did not wait for any pastor or friend to give me d go ahead,i prayed myself and got the good feelings i wanted and dat made me do ahead in d first place

enoff of d pity u r getting from dis thread abegiiii as if u r d only born again xtian

i cant believe you actually said that. the english say there goes i but for the grace of God. we are all human beings and the best of us can be deceived. pls have mercy and show compassion. thanks while at it.

@ superjet, please chill and begin to seek Gods face to help you out of this.  he knows what no NLder will ever know. may His mercies help you.

talk to your parents about this as soon as possible. it is not as bad as you fear

like i care again jjyou

a nigerian man dat used religion and she did not bother praying about it since "he said he saw in a trance dats shes his wife,when pple fall into d ditch wt their eyes opened,i dont waste time in telling them dat

if dis poster had left this born again thingy i wouldnt even have bothered posting like dis

the problem i have wt her is :she should stop blaming it on any pastor,dis girl claimed to be a born again,watever happened to her praying to God for answers

if she had not laid too much emphasies on d pastor issue and if she did not claim to be soo much into born againism then,i wouldnt have even bothered,but calling one pastor into d matter,when she herself did not bother going to find out by herself or praying is not a good excuse

let her leave any pastor or sister or aunty alone and accept thefact dat the mistake came from her alone

exactly why i have stayed in it this long. i really wanted my own story to be different and i know it would have been if the born again thing had not misled me. i so kept my self and never had a boyfriend until i met him. he remains my first date til now. i kept my self til marriage. i feel hurt, this is my reward for all those years of denying myself.

I feel very bad for you That's what happens when you care too mcuh about what society thinks. They are NOT in the marriage WITH you so if they said "well like mother like daughter", what do they know? They dont know your story. They only yarn dust from what they see outside and you should never let that make decisions for you. When your neighbors called the cops, you should have let him stay in prison for a while to wise up before eventually bailing him out. Shio.

Well the most you can do now is go and talk to your father. Stay with him with the kids, maybe then you have peace to sort things out. The fact that he would hit you esp in front of visitors is so sad esp since he's a good for nothing.

Dont understand all these pressured marriages to people one doesnt even like. not even attracted to. It's so sad and I blame our society since they make these women feel like they HAVE to join this institution to get respect. So pathetic

jenny, I believe she titled it "Her biggest mistake" not my "pastor's mistake" or "my mom's mistake". She said it herself that s=he wanted to believe and she didnt heed to her father's advice

What more do you want?

amebo

I still think you should take it easy on her. You sound as if you her perfect and you know it all, sorry no insults intended. If Adam the first man could goof and God provided a way out thru Jesus Christ , i dont think you should be this hard.

amebo no1.:

like i care again jjyou

a nigerian man dat used religion and she did not bother praying about it since "he said he saw in a trance dats shes his wife,when pple fall into d ditch wt their eyes opened,i dont waste time in telling them dat

if dis poster had left this born again thingy i wouldnt even have bothered posting like dis

the problem i have wt her is :she should stop blaming it on any pastor,dis girl claimed to be a born again,watever happened to her praying to God for answers

if she had not laid too much emphasies on d pastor issue and if she did not claim to be soo much into born againism then,i wouldnt have even bothered,but calling one pastor into d matter,when she herself did not bother going to find out by herself or praying is not a good excuse

let her leave any pastor or sister or aunty alone and accept thefact dat the mistake came from her alone

you know u care. nawao for you why you dey change name like say na wrapper? anyway chill she is not the greatest sinner. she made mistake which anyone can make facing good for nothing nigerian men. she believed a lie bad but it aint the end of the world.i have ben taking in before by bible quoting people so i know how easy it is to fall for these people.

have compassion of her as the bible enjoined you.

sparta:

amebo

I still think you should take it easy on her. You sound as if you her perfect and you know it all, sorry no insults intended. If Adam the first man could goof and God provided a way out thru Jesus Christ , i dont think you should be this hard.

when did i say im perfect,ive made my own mistakes and ive accepted them,i cant blame it on one man or dad


adam goofed and God sent jesus,did adam get the punishment he deserved or not?was he solded or not,or when he made d mistake God patted his back and said "well done my son,i know its just a mistake"

DeReloaded:

jenny, I believe she titled it "Her biggest mistake" not my "pastor's mistake" or "my mom's mistake". She said it herself that s=he wanted to believe and she didnt heed to her father's advice

What more do you want?

if u read thru u will see dat she carried a lot of blames to her pastor and born "againism"

the topic is quite different from the main post

and i dont want anything from her,i just gave my own opinion,i must not agree wt u pple must i?

jeez

It's not about agreement. I would think you'd know that I or all people dont give a damn on who agrees with me. Most people dont.

I just dont see what she's supposed to gain from your post. Obviously it's her mistake since she's the one that has to deal with the dude now abi?

and yea it's VERY possible for things like this to happen. people falling for "visionaries" is very common esp nowadays in naija.

DeReloaded:

It's not about agreement. I would think you'd know that I or all people dont give a damn on who agrees with me. Most people dont. 

I just dont see what she's supposed to gain from your post. Obviously it's her mistake since she's the one that has to deal with the dude now abi?

and yea it's VERY possible for things like this to happen. people falling for "visionaries" is very common esp nowadays in naija.

same here,i really dont care if anybody sees anything wrong wt my post or not,i post wat i feel like posting

wat did she gain from listening to her pastors and friends,nothing,so i dont want her to gain anything from my post,anyways she wouldnt cos ive not said "I SAW IT IN A TRANCE" like the others

when pple make mistakes wt their two eyes opened,i dont call it a mistake,their eyes were opened,but they refused to see

she has made her bed,so let her bleeping lie on it

.