SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN

1. Take off clothing and place it in a sectioned laundry hamper according to lights, darks, whites, man made or natural.

2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If husband is seen along the way cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom.

3. Look at womanly physique in the mirror and stick out belly. Complain and whine about getting fat.

4. Get in shower. Look for facecloth, arm cloth, loin cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

5. Wash hair once with Cucumber and Lamprey shampoo with 83 added vitamins. Wash hair again with Cucumber and Lamprey shampoo with 83 added vitamins.

6. Condition hair with cucumber and lamprey conditioner with enhanced natural crocus oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.

7. Wash face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten minutes until red raw.

8. Rinse conditioner off hair taking at least 15 minutes to make sure that it's all come off.

9. Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it waxed instead.

10. Scream loudly when husband flushes toilet and water loses pressure and turns red hot.

11. Turn off shower.

12. Squeegee all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mould spots with Tilex. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of small African country.

13. Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel.

14. Check entire body for remotest sign of spots. Attack with nails and or tweezers (if you can find them).

15. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If husband is seen, cover up any exposed areas and then rush to bedroom to spend hour and a half getting dressed.

SHOWER LIKE A MAN

1. Take off clothes while sitting on bed and leave them in a pile.

2. Walk naked to bathroom. If wife seen, shake knob at her while shouting "Way Hey!!"

3. Look in mirror and suck in gut to see your manly physique.

4. Admire size of knob in mirror, scratch bollocks and smell fingers for one last whiff.
Get in shower.

5. Don't bother to look for wash cloth, don't need one.

6. Wash face.

7. Wash armpits.

8. Laugh at how loud farts sound in the shower.

9. Wash bollocks and the surrounding area.

10. Wash arse, leaving hair on soap.

11. Shampoo hair but do not use conditioner.

12. Make Mohican hairstyle with shampoo. Pull back curtain to see self in mirror.

13. Piss in shower.

14. Rinse off and get out of shower. Fail to notice water on floor because shower curtain outside bath for whole shower time.
Partially dry off.

15. Look at self in mirror, flex muscles and admire size of knob (Charlie) again.

16. Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on floor.

17. Leave bathroom light and fan on.

18. Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, grab knob, go "Yeah baby" and thrust pelvis at her.

19. Put on yesterday's clothes

chioya don born anoda pikin

pomade who tell u?

LOL, dis is so not true, newais even if it was I prefer d man's version, more cost-effective and less time consuming.

chioya its gud to go on holls o, i bet dis are ur experiences, but u didn't say anytin bout d babies nw, where u keep dem all d while

hmmmmmmmmmmm
let wait for another 2 months
they will reveal themselves

@TYTY
wat do u pple want my babies for oooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,leave me naaaaaaaaaaaaa

maybe for ,

more grease to ur elbow then

@mykali
u too madam mykali
@shola
dey send u,

hmmm

do women really do all that much to bathe. well, i know i dont but it looks like there are people who do.

i can say the part about men is partially true.

@poster. do you really do this?

yes she does d female part, witnessed d male part & soon to xperience d pikin part

hmmm

hmmmmm²

Na wa o.

real wah

lola take style buy new pant na, this wan don hear am for thread and needle hand

she go manage am till next aswani market, if u don get new bail, make u call her

i go try. lola too like okrika i no know why

ass wey too big, na their problem be dat

flat bottom tytyrayol ow u dey

omo i too ploud, no pant wey no dey wear me

but nuttin 4 moi to pat or fiddle with

not necessary, so far u av somtin to use as ue table

i luv springy buuts makes its more fun wen u get bounced

hire lola for dat den

i dont lyk 2nd hand babes

u mean 2nd hand citizens?

romade:

i dont lyk 2nd hand babes

oooo not lola, lola is ochara, tear rubber

so her bla bla bla sabi tear rubber?