Since yours truly has been on forced holiday thanks to my yeye employer, I have become an avid church goer, I woke early for morning mass and went despite signs I had a bloated tummy, of course I looked out to ensure that yeye tolotolo which terrorises me hasn't come out yet, I bolted out and away to church I went, I soon settled down on my favourite pew hoping to be alone thanks to people who arrive such events without bothering to brush their mouth and they intend to sing every song loudly, my joy was quickly extinguished by an elderly man who joined me, all through the mass this man kept plucking his nose and playing with the resulting crude he dug up, I eyed him repeatedly in disgust but he looked away, as a Catholic I knew he must be joking if he thinks I will give him any peace of the Lord, I promptly ran out during the period to ensure I returned during communion and this man brought out his hand to shake me, I looked at him and said Never, the moment I looked away he forcefully shook me and left a trail of grime on my palm, I shrieked in horror, I didn't wait to quarrell with him, I ran out, running fast to go home and wash my hands, not soon had I exited the church gate did I see her, I have chyked her many times before and she rejected me, I ran and shook her hand, before she could say jack I touched her on her hair, shirt etc cleaning my hand with style and saying hello meantime, we baded off and I noticed she kept smelling herself and feeling weird, not soon had I got home, she sent me a stink text message of how she found out Wat i did, as she met someone who observed the whole incident, how do I apologise to this dame, I am hoping to score on an FWB level

Hmm this one is strong!

Story for the gods

You're so funny, couldn't stop laughing.