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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / A Lesser Evil: A Wife Who Can't Cook Or A Wife Who Can't Manage The Home (4121 Views)
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Re: A Lesser Evil: A Wife Who Can't Cook Or A Wife Who Can't Manage The Home by Stillfire: 1:45pm On Sep 22, 2015 |
Both husband and wife are to manage the home-front, unless the wife is not contributing anything financially. Then she can take sole control of home. In this day an age a man should be equipped with such 'homely' skills as well. It is very attractive and depicts him as a quintessential gentleman. 1 Like |
Re: A Lesser Evil: A Wife Who Can't Cook Or A Wife Who Can't Manage The Home by gidjah(m): 2:28pm On Sep 22, 2015 |
I am more organised than swt heart,but she can cook ,so whenever i return to meet a fairly ruff home, i just tell her,'honey,this thing shouldnt be here, that on should be there,..bla bla bla and she adjust.she is improving though, this gives me slight BP ATIMES |
Re: A Lesser Evil: A Wife Who Can't Cook Or A Wife Who Can't Manage The Home by MMotimo: 2:40pm On Sep 22, 2015 |
@ Topic The lesser evil is a woman who can't cook, I say this after almost 20 years of marriage. When I was growing up, my Mom would mandate you to be in the kitchen while she was cooking so we could learn. Most of the time, I stayed with her because I had no choice but the only thing I could really cook well by the time I got married in my 20s was stew. Till today, I still cannot cook plain white rice right without the aid of a rice cooker. My husband grew up with househelps who did the cooking and could not cook at all when we got married but we were alright because neither of us ever took the whole cooking thing as holy grail and we both had jobs so going to eateries when necessary was not a big deal. In the early part of our marriage before we left Lagos, I simply raided my Mom's freezer on weekends, we "visited" my maiden home or we ate out. From the beginning, a tidy home has always been higher priority for us, so has financial management. My husband excels in the former because he is one of those people whose brains cannot cannot function if the environment is untidy (we are never dirty) and I'm better with the latter because of what I learnt watching that same Mom (ironic that was not her emphasis). I improved on cooking after marriage and today, I cook the Naija dishes I like (I admit to our simple tastes) better than most people I know. As far as I am concerned, only my Mom cooks most of those dishes better than me. I finally learnt to cook well after marriage when she would visit our home. I did it in a coded manner, inviting her to cook "that your efo riro" egusi, fried rice, etc while I made secret notes to try later. Even with my greatly improved cooking skills, there are still days when we and our kids have cereal and milk for dinner or we buy takeout or we have bread and stew, or food without meat if we've run out. We like food but there are no rules as long as hunger can be satisfied. Ability to cook is overrated, keeping a clean house and financial management beat that skill any day IMO. The other home management stuff were my strengths from day 1 because those were the skills I imbibed quickly without being forced. I spent many Saturday mornings trudging Iddo, Balogun, Idumota, Gorodom, Jankara, etc with my Mom in search of bulk bargains and I can still find my way around those areas. Till today, I am still a good bargain shopper - that skill alone has saved our marriage tons of money we have diverted to other things. In the end, it depends on the spouses and whom they are attracted to. My outlook would not have worked with a different kind of man and vice versa. By the way, cleaning is a good way to keep fit as you grow older and you refuse to workout - that is what my husband tells me when I complain about the kids not doing enough chores around the house. His lack of rotundness would appear to confirm that. 5 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: A Lesser Evil: A Wife Who Can't Cook Or A Wife Who Can't Manage The Home by Jamean(f): 8:55pm On Sep 22, 2015 |
naijacutee: the wife is an Architect and does minimal consultant engagements from time to time. |
Re: A Lesser Evil: A Wife Who Can't Cook Or A Wife Who Can't Manage The Home by Jamean(f): 9:00pm On Sep 22, 2015 |
Kimoni: in a case where you don't get an exclusive package, which of the 2 is sacrosanct |
Re: A Lesser Evil: A Wife Who Can't Cook Or A Wife Who Can't Manage The Home by Jamean(f): 9:09pm On Sep 22, 2015 |
MMotimo: this is just fantastically real. people are not just being honest, house upkeep beats cooking now and later. Just like the way were brought up, it was instilled in us to lay our beds, arrange our clothes and keep the house tidy. my parents believes cooking can come anytime but for an adult to learn to be arranged is almost impossible. I have friends so I know what I am talking about |
Re: A Lesser Evil: A Wife Who Can't Cook Or A Wife Who Can't Manage The Home by Nobody: 10:58am On Jun 09, 2016 |
Before I had my first baby, I was almost OCD clean. I always wanted everytin to be orderly,even while heavily pregnant. After my first child, I realized everytin doesn't hv to be perfect all the time cos my baby needed me MOST of d time. Besides that motherhood kind of adds to a laidback attitude. Now, i like this comment. God bless you! |
Re: A Lesser Evil: A Wife Who Can't Cook Or A Wife Who Can't Manage The Home by davidif: 8:46am On Dec 13, 2016 |
naijacutee: What?!?!?! Cooking and cleaning outsourceable tasks? How old are you again? Please tell me you also have a family and children cos this statement is so naive it's not even funny. You must be assuming that house helps are readily available and are affordable to a lot of people and they simply are not. Secondly, the cooking and cleaning services you talk about are highly expensive and are financially imprudent for most families. Being a great parent requires one to be financially prudent; being able to live within ones means and being able to provide for your family and not spending money on things that can be done at home. Lastly, you assume that parenting and home management (including cooking) are mutually exclusive and separate from each another when they are not. They are all part of parenting. Parental responsibilities require you to be able to actually manage YOUR HOME! Its being able to provide a safe, clean and conducive environment for your family. That's called being a great parent. |
Re: A Lesser Evil: A Wife Who Can't Cook Or A Wife Who Can't Manage The Home by davidif: 8:48am On Dec 13, 2016 |
Kimoni: Gbam! |
Re: A Lesser Evil: A Wife Who Can't Cook Or A Wife Who Can't Manage The Home by davidif: 8:54am On Dec 13, 2016 |
MMotimo: Yay!!!!!!!!! |
Re: A Lesser Evil: A Wife Who Can't Cook Or A Wife Who Can't Manage The Home by Anfieldboss: 5:17pm On Jun 06, 2017 |
A wife who can't cook. It's easier to learn how to cook than hygiene. |
Re: A Lesser Evil: A Wife Who Can't Cook Or A Wife Who Can't Manage The Home by davidif: 11:08am On Aug 10, 2017 |
Jamean: See question, that's like asking me to chose between been robbed or being kidnapped? |
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