My name is Epiphanus,i once reside with my family somewhere in Enugu,but i leaved with my aunty in kogi state,my family is a catholic family,but for my aunty she got no choice.

Am a writer and a singer,i leaved with my aunty since i was 11,but sometimes i feel like a catholic,you know catholic has great respect for reverend,but this incident changed that view.

Am a writer,i have sold my novels in some schools in enugu and kogi and that made me some kind of a celebrity,yes local celebrity for now.

Although this conversation is a bit funny but it was a bit irritating and annoying when it happened.

I came home to Enugu around July,just after my neco examination and my brothers started worrying me to go to confession,they told me that there is a probablity that every boarder had stolen at least once, which is true.

I came to confession arena,although the queue was much but i manage to exercise patience until it got to my turn,within me i know the only sin i did was lying because am a talkative and all talkative's are liars,so i waited extra 90 minutes before it got to my turn(thank God for that).

After the usual recitation
ME: father i have lied many times and i have stole things too,i came to ask for forgiveness for also the ones i dont remember.

FATHER:when was the last time you came for confession?

ME:About six monthes ago

FATHER:And you are telling me that you just lied and stole for the last six monthes

ME:Are you the God?are you the one to predict my sin?

FATHER:You dont fight?

ME:You wan make kids take me do football?my bone no strong na

FATHER:You don't jealous people who are richer?

ME: do i look like a woman?

FATHER: You don't chase girls

ME(angry):whats wrong with you,am always shy around girls,how can i be a womanizer probably a girlizer.

FATHER:I have been watching you,i have seen you with difference type of girls,i saw your hands around their waiste.

ME:Reverend,you too corrupt,those are my cousin sisters,i never toast a girl.


FATHER:Am giving you 3 chaplets for that,say the chaplets 3 times.

ME:When was the last time you sinned against the lord?

FATHER:I cant remember.

ME:You are a great liar but you have a matured female cook,am giving you 5 chaplets for that.


I STORMED OUT OF THE CHURCH VIBRATING WITH ANGER WHILE THAT PRIEST KEPT LAUGHING.