Faithte:
Please a friend of mine needs advice on this.

Her story:-

I’m a young lady, I leave with my 2 Cousins, a Niece and Nephew (both of them belong to my Cousins)
My Eldest Cousin which I leave with, some months ago traveled for another cousin’s child dedication and came back very ill, she was treated medically, but no improvement occur.
She was then taken to the Church for prayers. While in the Church, Sister, Niece and Nephew visited but I wasn’t allow to visit.

When I finally had the opportunity to visit, I was told she was no longer in the Church, but then I notice that her Niece and Nephew were still visiting her even though her Sister was with her in the Church. Finally, she came back the following week, looking so ill, few days after she was back, I was told to leave her house, I left for my Pastor’s house without moving my things yet. She then called my Pastor to tell me to come and move my things.


after work I went to see her, this was late in the night, she insisted I move my things that night, I told her it wasn’t going to be possible cos it was late, that she would have to give me till weekend. I have pack my things and left their house, now staying with my Pastor. Before I left, I ask her if they told them in the church that I’m responsible for her illness? No answer was given to this question. After all effort done to no avail, she was then taken to the village, just few days ago I receive a call that she is dead.

My question now is, should I pay her Sister, Niece and Nephew a sympathetic visit, to console them? I once ask a close sister of mine this same question, her advice was that I shouldn’t go to their house again, because the deceased drove me out while she was alive, why should I go now that she is dead? She advice I can always sympathise or console them whenever we come in contact with each other but never to visit them at home to prevent causing more problem for myself. So please friends in the house what should I do, I’m kind of confuse……………..

Richy4:

Was your friend allowed into the house without paying rent, water bill electricity bill? Or was she paying?

Was there a cordial relationship between the two before her illness?

If the the answer was yes, that she was living in her house for free and there was a cordial relationship before her illness, I suggest she should not forget the past. it is not easy to harbor someone for free even when it was a close relative.

She should not go to that house because she was no longer welcomed, but she should try and attend the funeral. she must go with a trusted person as a pillar and support or shoulder to cry on.

I believe there will be insults but for the sake of the past relationship she had with her.It is called last respect



Yes it was a cordial relationship. They are both cousins. While leaving in the house, she assist in paying the bills. such as NEPA, water, purchase of gas when due, contribution towards feeding and even assist in the house rent.

But if you were paying the bills and there was no love between you, it will look as if you came to mock. just stay were you are and pretend as if you did not hear the news.