I just have a little challenge and it's killing me softly, am writing this from a weak and depressed mind, am a young lady in her early 20s. Sometimes last year, I began to love my very good friend...we've been friends for over 3yrs now before we started dating. The relationship grew very strong in love........to cut d long story short, a month into our dating, my friend opened up and told me he has a girl he is planning to get married to very soon, he started that he wants to get married to her not because he loves her but because he has dated her for over 5years, that am d person he truly loves..... I was so disappointed and heartbroken, I just couldn't figure out y he never told me he had a lady already all through d years we've been friends before we got into a relationship and became so serious with each other, and before I became comfortable and so intimate with him. This has caused a lot of tears and pains for me....am not crying or feeling bad because he is my first date or because we got so intimate, am down because I think I have been used and fooled...my sincere love for him was abused and taken advantage of..I tried avoiding him(because his wedding plan is on) but he still comes close saying even though he can't quit d other lady to marry me, he still wants to have me as a friend. I have become so confused and weak...I love him and he claims he loves me too, if I want to judge from some of his acts, I will say he loves me(he doesn't buy me gifts and gives me money sha, but I love him, I am comfortable with him)... Young mummies in the house, please help me with words of encouragement.... I don't want to go through this feelings(hurt and hatred) this year, whenever I see him and d lady, my mood changes, it tells clearly that am not happy. I want to get over all that has happened but dunno how, I don't want to live a depressed life. Thanks for your advice in anticipation.

This situation is way too big for advices..

Chai! This confusion pass me

Stay away from him for sometime.
Tell him to give you space cause the more you see him,the more you fall in love with him.

okerekeukachi:
I just have a little challenge and it's killing me softly, am writing this from a weak and depressed mind, am a young lady in her early 20s. Sometimes last year, I began to love my very good friend...we've been friends for over 3yrs now before we started dating. The relationship grew very strong in love........to cut d long story short, a month into our dating, my friend opened up and told me he has a girl he is planning to get married to very soon, he started that he wants to get married to her not because he loves her but because he has dated her for over 5years, that am d person he truly loves..... I was so disappointed and heartbroken, I just couldn't figure out y he never told me he had a lady already all through d years we've been friends before we got into a relationship and became so serious with each other, and before I became comfortable and so intimate with him. This has caused a lot of tears and pains for me....am not crying or feeling bad because he is my first date or because we got so intimate, am down because I think I have been used and fooled...my sincere love for him was abused and taken advantage of..I tried avoiding him(because his wedding plan is on) but he still comes close saying even though he can't quit d other lady to marry me, he still wants to have me as a friend. I have become so confused and weak...I love him and he claims he loves me too, if I want to judge from some of his acts, I will say he loves me(he doesn't buy me gifts and gives me money sha, but I love him, I am comfortable with him)... Young mummies in the house, please help me with words of encouragement.... I don't want to go through this feelings(hurt and hatred) this year, whenever I see him and d lady, my mood changes, it tells clearly that am not happy. I want to get over all that has happened but dunno how, I don't want to live a depressed life. Thanks for your advice in anticipation.

Don't be friends with him. You say he loves you how? How has he shown love to you sneaking to get married, never bought gifts for you breaks your heart, does not really care about your feelings he still wants to hang around and get whatever he can get from you please tell yourself how this man has loved you yet made minimal investment in the relationship. No need to hate him its a waste of emotions that will keep him important if you want to get over him you want to be indifferent to him you start by cutting contact and living your life enjoyably. The pain is part of it but if you stay steady and learn more of who you are and what you want he will soon become a dot in your life. You will be fine.

All the best.

My dear, there's nothing you can do than to wait for time...with time you will get over it...time heals, but for now, you will still be feeling hurt, that's human feelings for you...we are wired like that...just give it time, meanwhile, i can occupy that vacuum he has left in your heart