o boy ruin the relationship is d best.
I dey your back

SSpeter:
I know this might not be totally right but at least it will make me feel great. Egbon wants to get married in march and automatically I will become the best Man. But I don't want him to get married to her. It is not because of her but the dad.

It all started back in 1998 my dad was having a court case with our supposed in-law over our house. The house was sold to my dad by the late late brother of our supposed in-law. That was even before my dad got married. We have lived in that house for more than 10yrs. My siblings and I were born there. After the death of the brother in 1998 he dragged my dad to court saying his brother was only a benefactor and does not have the legal right to sell the building and their late father made him the executor of His properties according to the late father's will. My parents were partners in business and their office was located at the ground floor of the building where we lived. Their goods were also stored there (plumbing equipment).

Prior to joining the plumbing business, my dad was into commercial inter-state transport services after suffering heavy losses he auctioned what was left and joined my mum in the plumbing business. A year later he was in court with our supposed in-law. The legal battle started in December. Egbon travelled with an aunt of mine who had won a visa lottery the previous year. My sisters were older than the guys. they were already in boarding school. I was the king of the house. My dad suffered many embarrassment at the hands of our supposed in-law. He dragged the case for some years money meant for business ended up in legal battles. My dad had to borrow to pay suppliers. He couldn't not order for new materials anymore and the business eventually collapsed. Extended families gave their support until 2003 when a lagos high court handed our supposed in-law victory

My dad wanted to appeal the judgement but his lawyer told him to get an apartment with whatever he has left. Although my parents thought they hid everything from us. Perhaps my sisters didn't notice because they were not always home but I saw my mum cry severally. I saw the fears in my dad eyes. I listened to their whispering at night I knew we were doomed. Our supposed In-law sold the house to a bank. The bank gave two weeks to evacuate. But before the notice expired they brought sledge hammer and started destroying the building with our properties in it. My dad tried to protest but he was beaten and arrested. For the first time I saw our "Supposed In-law" that day ordering the boys to destroy everything. My dad was later released days after. I went to live with my cousins. My sisters also went to live with my other cousins.

In 2006 I wrote a mail to Egbon I narrated all that happened to him and he vowed he was going to ensure that they payed for it dearly. Few years later, I got admission into the university my parents embraced christ; But I still feel bitter. How time flies, my sisters are both married and it's just me preparing for the life of a bachelor; Until recently my brother told me his plans of getting married, I noticed it because he has visited us more than usual last year and had extensive discussions with my parents. But whenever He came back He still promised my dad that he will never forget all that happened. My dad told him that was in the past but I know what my brother was capable of doing as regards family.

He brought his supposed girl friend (I believe that is all she will ever be) to the house last christmas everyone welcomed her but immediately I set my eyes on her, she looked like the man that was giving orders to tear down our house. I asked her for her surname, when she said ****US, I knew she was the daughter of our long time enemy. When they left, my mum and dad begged me that I shouldn't say anything. That they have forgiven him. She invited my parents and I during the new year but I declined. I have also told my brother I can't be his best man. He thought am joking cos it was via mail. My brother had assured me severally whenever I told him what became of us after then that incident and he told me "I will give up anything to deal with the Man that messed with my family". I guess I will have to tell him the whole truth. But my parents keep calling me every single day to beg. "Saying I should not bring him misery. That they were happy he decided to bring home a cool headed lady".....But I just can't let it go. Unless my brother and I will decide not to be brothers anymore because I will never go to his house if he marries her. I will never associate myself with him or anything that has to do with him.

I have finished typing the truth I want to send the mail to him...I don't know why I am hesitating (I guess my parents will forgive me sooner or later) but he has to know the truth!!!!....i can't dine with my enemy!.....I don't want to see her dad face again....never...I hope am doing the right thing....i think I am.....perhaps I am...

c'mon matured man don't do dat.....

godoluwa:
God bless you bro

Lol

Oga boss

o boy ruin the relationship is d best.
I dey your back

When someone shows you their true colour my bro pls never try painting another,for you do avoid frustration strongly advise your brother not to marry her.for someone to be as wicked as that ahn!

Bro tell your Egbon, let him know what he is getting into and let him deal with in his own way. If your in-law wants peace he is going to make sure the wedding takes place at all cost, honestly this is his time to lose.

tell your brother

Please, forgive and tell your brother in a lovely manner in a way he could reason along with you and resolve the issue. It's better to let him know now than after the marriage

What if your parents died in the process of this trauma with the supposed inlaw.....guy tell your brother to call it off with the daughter of the wicked man it is pay back time. She may get a better man but that one no concern u abeg

Whether your brother is going to marry her or not is his decision not yours, but I believe your brother should be aware. It is better he knows what happened between the families before the marriage, then he can choose if he can be an in law to the family that almost ruined his family.
Tell him, but don't tell him with the intention of him calling off the wedding, tell him so he can be aware and he can then make his own decision...

MY ADVICE...

raziboi:





c'mon matured man don't do dat.....

matured? do you understand the meaning of maturity? if you are married, you will understand what marriage means & the need for op to tell his brother right now. @sspeter, please tell your brother & if he decided to marry the girl, let him have his way.

Vengeance is best served cold...I'm with u all d way.

holusormi:
Follow your heart !!! As far as this case is concerned you cannot be wrong .... On the flip side however , if you decide to tell your brother and ignore what your parents said , what happens if he still marries her ? Anybody who goes on a journey of revenge should dig two graves ...

Although if na me , I go tell am ooo.... Yeah am badt like that !!!

But IDK sha

see ur big lips like pomo.

It is only ur brother that has d final say to dis case now.reason is that he is d one getting married to d lady in question here.u will definitely tell him and it won't stop d marriage.just let him kw that u r nt telln him to stop his relationship with d lady but to let him kw d truth.if he decides to marry her,it is nt ur problem. Whether u tell him today or later in life. surely d cat will be led out smhw one-day. Is either u take dis truth to ur grave or u feel ur mind. Also I will advice u to pray so it won't come to d worst where by it will back fire smhw. I pray God gives u wisdom and guide ur hrt becos no 1 can advice u now. It is jst u alone can do dis.

Bros telling ur bro is the best! But there are two things to this, he may not see anything wrong with the girl since she was not the one that treated ur parents that way. Definitely, ur bro is not dumb and shud be old enof to take decisions on his own. All these people wey don stay for abroad no dey reason like us for naija ooo. So e fit marry am eventually or not but make e no dey like say e no dey aware na Y I said u shud let him know.

Creamish:
Why is it that children pay for their parent's sins?

The holy book said it.

SSpeter:
I know this might not be totally right but at least it will make me feel great. Egbon wants to get married in march and automatically I will become the best Man. But I don't want him to get married to her. It is not because of her but the dad.

It all started back in 1998 my dad was having a court case with our supposed in-law over our house. The house was sold to my dad by the late late brother of our supposed in-law. That was even before my dad got married. We have lived in that house for more than 10yrs. My siblings and I were born there. After the death of the brother in 1998 he dragged my dad to court saying his brother was only a benefactor and does not have the legal right to sell the building and their late father made him the executor of His properties according to the late father's will. My parents were partners in business and their office was located at the ground floor of the building where we lived. Their goods were also stored there (plumbing equipment).

Prior to joining the plumbing business, my dad was into commercial inter-state transport services after suffering heavy losses he auctioned what was left and joined my mum in the plumbing business. A year later he was in court with our supposed in-law. The legal battle started in December. Egbon travelled with an aunt of mine who had won a visa lottery the previous year. My sisters were older than the guys. they were already in boarding school. I was the king of the house. My dad suffered many embarrassment at the hands of our supposed in-law. He dragged the case for some years money meant for business ended up in legal battles. My dad had to borrow to pay suppliers. He couldn't not order for new materials anymore and the business eventually collapsed. Extended families gave their support until 2003 when a lagos high court handed our supposed in-law victory

My dad wanted to appeal the judgement but his lawyer told him to get an apartment with whatever he has left. Although my parents thought they hid everything from us. Perhaps my sisters didn't notice because they were not always home but I saw my mum cry severally. I saw the fears in my dad eyes. I listened to their whispering at night I knew we were doomed. Our supposed In-law sold the house to a bank. The bank gave two weeks to evacuate. But before the notice expired they brought sledge hammer and started destroying the building with our properties in it. My dad tried to protest but he was beaten and arrested. For the first time I saw our "Supposed In-law" that day ordering the boys to destroy everything. My dad was later released days after. I went to live with my cousins. My sisters also went to live with my other cousins.

In 2006 I wrote a mail to Egbon I narrated all that happened to him and he vowed he was going to ensure that they payed for it dearly. Few years later, I got admission into the university my parents embraced christ; But I still feel bitter. How time flies, my sisters are both married and it's just me preparing for the life of a bachelor; Until recently my brother told me his plans of getting married, I noticed it because he has visited us more than usual last year and had extensive discussions with my parents. But whenever He came back He still promised my dad that he will never forget all that happened. My dad told him that was in the past but I know what my brother was capable of doing as regards family.

He brought his supposed girl friend (I believe that is all she will ever be) to the house last christmas everyone welcomed her but immediately I set my eyes on her, she looked like the man that was giving orders to tear down our house. I asked her for her surname, when she said ****US, I knew she was the daughter of our long time enemy. When they left, my mum and dad begged me that I shouldn't say anything. That they have forgiven him. She invited my parents and I during the new year but I declined. I have also told my brother I can't be his best man. He thought am joking cos it was via mail. My brother had assured me severally whenever I told him what became of us after then that incident and he told me "I will give up anything to deal with the Man that messed with my family". I guess I will have to tell him the whole truth. But my parents keep calling me every single day to beg. "Saying I should not bring him misery. That they were happy he decided to bring home a cool headed lady".....But I just can't let it go. Unless my brother and I will decide not to be brothers anymore because I will never go to his house if he marries her. I will never associate myself with him or anything that has to do with him.

I have finished typing the truth I want to send the mail to him...I don't know why I am hesitating (I guess my parents will forgive me sooner or later) but he has to know the truth!!!!....i can't dine with my enemy!.....I don't want to see her dad face again....never...I hope am doing the right thing....i think I am.....perhaps I am...

You see, that's what I keep saying.
It's a small world. Someone said to me one day, "you'll never meet 'them' again." I laughed 'cos I have seen life more than the aged.
I try as much as I can to be unbelievable nice to a fault.

Listening to Make Am by Patoranking.
#I shall say nothing here. I reserve my comments.

OP, you weren't directly hurt.

SSpeter:
a Yoruba adage

OP: You can have a bad wife but NEVER settle for bad in law.

Tell him but if he chooses to marry her stil show your support...na him go marry her nor be you

This is quite a dicey as well as delicate matter.In my humble point of view, I believe breaking egbon's relationship (worse case scenario) is less disastrous than allowing impending fracas in/ between two families. Do the needful and tell your bro what he needs to know and let him go right ahead and decide for himself, after all, a lion( intending father in-law) cannot give birth to an ewe (supposed girlfriend) .

Story for the gods!

Op tell us the aftermaths of ur delimer oo.. Will really wil like to learn.. Nd also all the best

I think your brother shld know that the truth about the lady's family. It's up to him to decide if he still wants to go ahead with the marriage. Even if both sides decide to forgive the truth needs to be known and understood by them all. Vengence is for God.

themilanway:
Call a family meeting that involves your parent,married sisters and your brother.

Tell every one present your findings about who the girl in question is and ask them to verify your claim from your parents.

Tell your brother to his face that you won't be part of his marriage to the girl but that doesn't change or stop your love for him.

Also let him know that you are not making decision for him regarding whether he marry the girl or not,you are only setting the record straight for posterity

May good reasoning and wisdom guide you

Gbam!

Attn SSPeter

Carry on. In fact that marriage must not hold.

MISSCONGENIALITY:
So u people have allowed his village people to use u as a weapons of destructions abi? Daris God oo

we're just telling him the truth

Broz, all I can say is Let go nd let GOD. Forgive her nd her family. God has vindicated u nd ur family.

lofty900:
I support you 100%. I'll do the same if I were in your shoes. Forward the mail to your brother before he makes a terrible mistake

please how's he making a terrible mistake? is the girl her father? who knows she might not have been born when the incident happened, the old testament said the sins of the father should be visited onto the children until the 4th generation, but Christ came and told us old things have passed away and all things have become new.

I have no problem with him telling the brother about what her father did to his family, what I have a problem with is the manner in which he will tell the brother cos from his write up Supra he's heart is still filled with hate and unforgiveness. What e should be telling him is to tell the brother calmly an let the brother know the family has forgiven her family and moved on and that he just wanted him to know shekinah, cos them go still jam theirselves on their wedding day, Family to Family

emmyw:
You Better Summarize This Write Up

i tell you mehn... ano even sabi wetin ady find for other pipu family business sef.. abi na me go be the MC of the day ni? abegi...

what if after doing everything your brother decides to let go and forgive how would you feel...

Goridoe:


i tell you mehn... ano even sabi wetin ady find for other pipu family business sef.. abi na me go be the MC of the day ni? abegi...