Hi everyone am new in this forum. I have a story which I have been putting together for sometime now. I want the chief editors and everyone to help me assess it before submittion to my publisher. God bless u

This content is strictly author's possession. Reproduction by any unauthorized person is prohibited and will be dealth with. GOD BLESS U

Rachael Ogbonna is a 16 year old girl. She was born into the family of Mr and Mrs Ogbonna. They had other children making a total number of five children (3girls n 2 boys). She is the second child and the most favorite child of her father because of her intelligence. At a tender age of 5,she could read books meant for primary 4 students. Her father, who was a civil servant and her mother, who was a trader vowed to send her to school with every penny they had because of her intelligence. She was obedient, kind and because of these traits, she was loved by everyone. This caused envyness by the other children who always felt they were neglected. They made life miserable for her by preventing her from reading and giving her their own share of housework and always beating her at the slight mistake. Yet, she did not allow these treatments to deter her from achieving her goal.


Richard Ebong was a 20 year old guy who was from a very rich family. They were so rich that they wined and dined with the president of the country every day. Due to this lifestyle, he grew up to be a pompous and arrogant snob who thinks that no one is up to his standard. He was also a very intelligent boy. At a tender age, he could draw diagrams of tall buildings and always telling his parents that his ambition I sto be an architect. His parents sponsored his dream and decided to send him to a Nigerian university so that he can mingle with other students who are not up to his standard. Less I forget, his parents are God fearing Christians who on seeing their only son's behavior decided that he will study in a Nigerian university to experience the hardship other students go through. Being an intelligent student, he wrote jamb, passed and was admitted in THE UNIVERSITY OF BENIN, UGBOWO to study medicine and science. On the day if his departure to school, his mother decided to advise him
Mum: " my son, please don't join bad gangs ooo. U no dat our family is an influential one. Please don't put us to shame"
Richard: "Mum, u no I have always been a good boy, I will not change my behavior"
Mum: ok my son, I love you
Richard : "I love you too mum
Dad: Ehhh, can u guys enter the car now, its already late
Richard and Mum: " ok"
They dropped him at school and made sure he settled down before leaving him. Richard who was very tired laid down in his three bedroom apartment and slept off

Racheal wrote Jamb the same year and gained admission into THE UNIVERSITY OF BENIN, UGBOWO. Her parents could not afford the money required for the admission and so she had to forfeit it. She got a job as a teacher and continue to work in order to save money for admission the next year. After working for nine months, she got her jamb form, passed and gained admission into the university. On the day of he departure, she met her mum crying in the living room and her dad consoling her
Racheal: " Mummy, wat's wrong with u? Y are u crying?
Mrs Ogbonna: "Am crying because am happy and am also sad". Am happy because you have gained admission and I am sad because I will miss you
* other siblings hiss*
Racheal: " mummy, u don't have to cry, I promise I will be a good girl and make you proud "
Mrs Ogbonna: " Dats my daughter ". Hugs her. I love
u
Racheal: I love u too mum
Mr Ogbonna: let's go Racheal so that I can come back early
Hugs mum*

Will post when I see comments to continue

Nice story. I dey follow u bumper to bumper. Abeg update. Waiting...

Tanks for encouraging me jaytoy

Fantasticks:
Tanks for encouraging me jaytoy

you welcome... Oya i done carry my zobo and gala ooooo carry my chair join for update ooooo. Oya dey throw am in. I dey wait

THIS EPISODE IS DEDICATED TO MY FIRST COMMENTATOR. JAYTOY

After arrival at the university of Benin campus, Racheal settled in the female hostel and due to the stress of the journey, she slept off.
"Oh, my GOD, its 7:30am, I am already late for my first lecture", Racheal lamented. She hurriedly took her bath and entered the shuttle bus going to her department. As she was entering the class, she heard a loud voice saying,
Lecturer: young lady, who gave u the audacity to enter my class!
Racheal: Am sorry sir, I slept.........
Lecturer interrupted*

Fantasticks:
THIS EPISODE IS DEDICATED TO MY FIRST COMMENTATOR. JAYTOY

After arrival at the university of Benin campus, Racheal settled in the female hostel and due to the stress of the journey, she slept off.
"Oh, my GOD, its 7:30am, I am already late for my first lecture", Racheal lamented. She hurriedly took her bath and entered the shuttle bus going to her department. As she was entering the class, she heard a loud voice saying,
Lecturer: young lady, who gave u the audacity to enter my class!
Racheal: Am sorry sir, I slept.........
Lecturer interrupted*

oooooooo too short. Y na? U wan give me heart attack ni? No worry pple go soon fall in. Dont get discouraged my dear. There are some ghost readers but in due time pple will comment na u go even tire. My mb go soon dey exhaust oooo

Lecturer: Go to the back of the class. I am pardoning u because u are a fresher. Don't come late to my class next time.
Racheal: Thank u sir, God bless you sir. She quickly took a seat without interrupting the class.
" Ahhh, Thank God for today" she thought.
After lectures, she proceeded to the school library for registration. On her way, she accidentally colided with someone
Racheal: "Oh my GOD! Please am sorry. It wasn't intentional"
Richard: Am sorry too. I was not concentrating. Am very sorry". Helps her to pack her books.
" My name is Richard Ebong, may I no ur name"
Racheal: "My name is Racheal Ogbonna"
Richard: Wow! Dats a nice name. Am pleased to meet you
Racheal: Same here
Richard: can I have ur contact?
Racheal: ok, 07045......,
Richard: Ok tanks, I will see u around
" Hmm, that babe is really beautiful, see her packaging. I must wow that babe ooo. Omotorewa!" Richard thought

On getting to the house, she was so exhausted that she forgot to freshen up. She slept off.
TELEPHONE RINGS
Racheal: who is calling me? Ooooo
Reluctantly picked the call
Racheal: Hello! Who is on the line?
Richard: Its the guy that collected your number on your way to the library.
Racheal: " ok, how are you doing?
Richard: Am ok n u
Racheal: Am fine
Richard: I just wanted to say hi because am new here and I want to be ur friend
Racheal: am also a new student, I am studying medicine and surgery
Richard: Wow! Am studying the same course. Dats good
Racheal: ok
Richard: Just wanted to know how you are doing. We will talk later.
Racheal: ok, no problem bye
Richard: bye
" y did this guy call me at dis time of the night? I hope he is not planning something " she thought
Richard was so excited after the call. " Plan A executed, I must date that babe" he thought and went to bed.
After lectures the next day, she heard somebody calling her
"Hello,hello"
Rachea-:"Am sorry, please may I know you?
Janet: my name is Janet and am a new student. May I also know u
Racheal: My name is Racheal.
Janet: I liked the way you answered questions in the class. Can I be ur friend?
Racheal: Yes u can
Janet: I stay at Ekosodin.
Racheal: I stay at Ekosodin as well.
Janet: Ok then, lets go home together
They left

Richard watched her throughout the class that he did not concentrate on the teachings of the lecturer.
" This girl is beautiful and intelligent. Perfect combination. Just exactly what I need " he thought
On his way home, he stopped at the school canteen to buy some refreshments when he saw his best friend, Gbenga who attended the same secondary school with him.
He shouted. " Gbenga,Gbenga "
Gbenga turned to see his friend Richard from secondary school.
"Oh my gosh, wat are you doing here? He said
" I was admitted into this school this semester" Richard
replied
"It's been a long time" he said
" Yes, wat course are you studying " Richard asked
" Civil engineering " he replied
" Wow! That's nice, am studying medicine and surgery "
" its a good course, welcome to uniben "
"Tanks bro"
" ok then, we will meet later, bye"
"Bye"

To be continued tomorrow. Expecting to see ur comments. Looking forward to it

Nice one,

kul....even tho it seems u are rushing it

Snowangel4:
kul....even tho it seems u are rushing it

Ok. Just posting the initial parts. The action has not yet begun

Snowangel4:
kul....even tho it seems u are rushing it

Tanks darling. I appreciate

CuteChiluv:
Nice one,

Tanks dear

THIS UPDATE IS DEDICATED TO MY READERS. CHILUV AND SNOW ANGEL. TANKS FOR THE ENCOURAGEMENT. WILL POST NOW

Racheal received a call on getting to the house. *GRRHHH! Phone rings*
"Hello Richard, how are you doing" she said
"Am alright and you"
"Am ok, how was lectures today" she asked
"It was cool"
"Ok" she said.
Richard said "please Racheal, can you do me a favor?
" wat's it about? If its within my power, I will do it"
"Ok, can we hook up this weekend? I mean can I take u out on a date?
" hmm, ok when will that be?
"This Saturday if you are free"
"Ok then, see you. Bye"
"Bye"
Richard ended the call feeling fulfilled. "Ah! Thank God she agreed. I like her and I want to have her as my woman. I must have her"

In Rachael's house, Janet came to visit her friend. She knocked
" hello, who is there?
"It's me, Janet"
" hey, come in. Welcome to my house "
" its cool"
" Tanks "
They talked about general things, their studies, their lives and so on. It got to a stage that they started talking about relationships.
" are you in a relationship?
" No, but there is a guy asking me out"
" who is that? Maybe I know him"
" His name is Ebong Richard, he is in our department "
" oh! The tall handsome guy. Yes, I know him. He is a very good person. I like him. Consider his proposal "
" I will think about it "
" ok, I have to leave now, I have a date with my boyfriend"
" who is that?
" his name is George Clinton,. He is our class rep"
" ok then let me not keep you, bye. Tanks for visiting. I really enjoyed your company"
" you are welcome, see you in class. Bye"
" Bye"

The last update for the day. Coming up. Watch out

Grrhhhhhh! Racheal stirs up from sleep.
" oh my GOD, who is calling me at this time of the night?
" hello "
" hello dear, good morning"
"Good morning. Oh! It's u Richard. Am sorry, I was sleeping when you call came in"
" ok, I just wanted to talk to you,. Am feeling lonely and I can't sleep cos am eager to hear ur voice "
" hmm, ok"
" so can I ask you a question?
" ok, go ahead"
" do you have a boyfriend?
" hmm, no"
" I hope you are not lying to me"
" am not lying "
"Ok, I believe you"
" y did you ask?
" nothing, I just wanted to know "
" ok"
" please don't forget our date on Saturday "
" I won't "
" I will pick you up by5pm. Is it ok by u?
" yea, its fine.
" alright angel, go back to bed. Goodnight!
" same, tanks"
" least I forget, thanks for picking my call at such a late hour"
" u are welcome "
" if you hadn't picked, I don't know what I would have done. I can now go to bed in peace.
" hmm, ok. U are welcome "
" goodnight "
"Goodnight"
" hmm, I think this guy really likes me, lets see how it goes " she thought after ending the call and went back to sleep.
I WILL BE UPDATING TOMORROW PLEASE LEAVE UR COMMENTS SO THAT I CAN KNOW MY ERRORS. GOODNIGHT

following.....

Nice story keep it up... Following

wazupguy:
following.....

Tanks dear. Please don't hesitate to comment if you notice any error.

Weirdman:
Nice story keep it up... Following

Tanks dear

Am dedicating this update to my new commentators . Weird man and watzup. Tanks for commenting

She woke up on Saturday morning and started cleaning the house. She washed her clothes, cleaned the house and washed the plate. After she finished, Janet arrived.
" Babe, wetin u get for house?
" see you, long throat. Na jollof rice and fish I cook oooo.
" No wahala, I dey hungry "
After eating, Janet said, " Babe, wahala dey ooo"
" wetin be dat"
" Na my guy ooo, he checked my watsup chat and found out that I was chatting with Collins, the guy wey dey toast me, and found out that I have accepted to date Collins and I have been collecting money from him although we haven't had sex"
" Ahhhhh! Babe wetin u do no good ooo. Y u go do dat kind thing? Ok now wetin u want make I do now?
" Abeg I want make you help me beg am. I love George and I don't want to lose him. Please I can't afford to lose him "
" babe, u no say u love am, u come dey cheat on am. Babe, make I yarn u the main matter, wat u did was wrong? It was really really w

nice story

Hmmmmm...NYC stori

She woke up on Saturday morning and started cleaning the house. She washed her clothes, cleaned the house and washed the plate. After she finished, Janet arrived.
" Babe, wetin u get for house?
" see you, long throat. Na jollof rice and fish I cook oooo.
" No wahala, I dey hungry "
After eating, Janet said, " Babe, wahala dey ooo"
" wetin be dat"
" Na my guy ooo, he checked my watsup chat and found out that I was chatting with Collins, the guy wey dey toast me, and found out that I have accepted to date Collins and I have been collecting money from him although we haven't had sex"
" Ahhhhh! Babe wetin u do no good ooo. Y u go do dat kind thing? Ok now wetin u want make I do now?
" Abeg I want make you help me beg am. I love George and I don't want to lose him. Please I can't afford to lose him "
" babe, u no say u love am, u come dey cheat on am. Babe, make I yarn u the main matter, wat u did was wrong? It was really really wrong. Please don't do it next time oo. No wahala, I go follow u go see am. Maybe wen he see me, he go accept ur apology"
" tanks dear, when should we go?
" On Sunday. Cos I have a date with Richard today"
" No wahala. Tanks babe"
" come on, wat are Friends for? Don't mention "
"Ok"
They continued chatting. After a while, Rachael's phone rang. Grrrrrhhhhh!
" Babe, Na Richard dey call so oooo"
" pick am naaa"
" Hello. How are you doing?
"Am ok n u"
" Am fine"
" ok"
" how is everything?
" everything is fine "
" ok. Am missing you oo"
" hmmm. Ok ooo"
"I hope you are getting set for our date"
" yea"
" ok then, see u at 5:00pm. Bye"
"Bye"

[quote author=Fantasticks post=42389585]She woke up on Saturday morning and started cleaning the house. She washed her clothes, cleaned the house and washed the plate. After she finished, Janet arrived.
" Babe, wetin u get for house?
" see you, long throat. Na jollof rice and fish I cook oooo.
" No wahala, I dey hungry "
After eating, Janet said, " Babe, wahala dey ooo"
" wetin be dat"
" Na my guy ooo, he checked my watsup chat and found out that I was chatting with Collins, the guy wey dey toast me, and found out that I have accepted to date Collins and I have been collecting money from him although we haven't had sex"
" Ahhhhh! Babe wetin u do no good ooo. Y u go do dat kind thing? Ok now wetin u want make I do now?
" Abeg I want make you help me beg am. I love George and I don't want to lose him. Please I can't afford to lose him "
" babe, u no say u love am, u come dey cheat on am. Babe, make I yarn u the main matter, wat u did was wrong? It was really really w[/quote
Sorry it was an error. I have posted the complete version