Wikipedia defines rape as a type of sexual assault usually involving sexual intercourse or other forms of sexual penetration against any person without the person’s consent. Rape is as old as humanity itself, an act that has been perpetuated against humans (mostly women) by their fellow men.

It has been discussed and considered for ages from many different angles and perspectives. Rape has been examined as a gender issue given that significant amount of violence against women and girls border on rape. Its application as a weapon of war has also come up prominently as topics for discussion by the UN, Amnesty International and other international and local Civil Society Organizations. It has also been assessed as a cultural affliction in some societies and much more, but in all of history, rape is and has been known and observed by humanity as a heinous act unleashed on humans by humans.

In Nigeria today, rape statistics though largely inaccurate due to under reporting of cases and lack of actual data taking are unforgivably high and the numbers are growing at a rate that could make anyone believe it has become beautiful. According to a survey conducted by the CLEEN Foundation released in 2013, the South -east region interestingly has the lowest incidence rate in the country with one in every 100 women (quite a dangerous figure for a lowest rate); the South-west and North -west regions both have statistics of one in every 25 women – four percent each; the North-central followed with three per cent – one in every 33 women polled, followed by the North-east – 6 percent. With 10 percent incidence of rape or attempted rape, the South-south region ingloriously is the rape capital of Nigeria.

The main reason why rape has become beautiful in Nigeria today, to such an extent that it seems to have come to stay is simple, it is because people get away with it, period. The level of sexual assault in Nigeria will increase in the next few years because the systems for handling such issues in Nigeria are designed to promote it. It is essentially designed to blame the victim and not the offender; it functions to reward the oppressor with more impetus to repeat his or her crimes with more tact and vigor.

If the average rape victim summons courage to walk into a police station in Nigeria today to report the evil done to her (its usually a her), some of the first questions or responses she will likely get from so called security operatives (including female officers) will come in forms such as:

What were you doing with a boy in a room or by the street corner? What were you wearing? Or how won’t you be raped look at what you are wearing and so on and on and on….

For me such questions express the height of stupidity employed in addressing the issue and why it’s a long way from reduction/eradication. The mindset in itself is treacherous and far worse than the act. Blaming a woman for rape on the account of her dressing is as stupid and callous as blaming a shop owner for his stolen goods, asking him why he showcased them for people to see. It is as wicked as blaming a robbery victim for having money, phones, cars or other valuables that could be stolen or a murder victim for having life that could be taken. Under this mindset, a larger percentage of energy is spent on trying to prove the victim is guilty of her own rape, leaving little or no room for the perpetrator to be punished.

If indecent dressing is responsible for rape then why was it not rampant in the old days when our great-grand parents walked around nearly naked. Yes in most modern day Nigerian towns and cities today, there was a time when women walked unaccompanied to the stream, farm, market and every other place bare-chested with their beautiful, succulent, attractive breasts and thighs totally bare and open and yet rape was not rampant then. It was largely because the traditional justice system in the past though quite crude was very effective. In some communities in those days, to think of raping a woman was as good as literally planning to loose your genitals, your life or total banishment from the land and in almost all cases, no one went unpunished.

If indecent dressing is the excuse for rape then why are minors being raped rampantly everyday in Nigeria? What possibly can a 2 or 4 year old girl do or wear to appear sexually attractive to a man. But we’ve spent so many years blaming matured rape victims for rape while letting the perpetrators get away and now little children are the new target and we are shouting. We still haven’t stopped the blame game anyway, we have just changed to blaming the parents of the children, and I ask, when will the evildoer ever get blamed for his evil? I do not imagine that parents shouldn’t be doing more to protect their children, but if a man is murdered in cold blood, will you blame the man for being kill-able or his parents for giving birth to a child that could be killed or will you hold the murder responsible.

What of the issue of marital rape, for so many people (including many women interestingly) it does not even exist, even in the dictionary. So many people believe that any manner or type of sex a married man has with his wife is absolutely legal. After all if a man bought his wife with a bride price, he has the constitutional right to do whatever he wishes with his property/tool. A farmer has the right to milk his goat anytime or season he pleases, it is no one’s business. The irony is that the law protects women from battery by their husbands, why shouldn’t it protect them from being raped by their husbands? If a man can beat and kill his wife why can’t he rape her?

Rape has become beautiful in Nigeria today not just because we have progressively moved away from our values of old, but because we have unconsciously built a society where the victim is guilty once she speaks up, where we systematically enable rapists get away and walk as free as constitutional layers while looking for their next prey.

Much should not be expected from security agents and judicial officers responsible for prosecuting rapists because apart from being ill equipped and ill trained technically, emotionally and socially, they are also part of the larger society that has learnt to blame the victim and therefore reflect such mentality within the system.

Everyone must speak up against rape, yes; men, women, children, natives, foreigners and most importantly victims and their families. We must all speak up with the mindset and perception that channels every bit of resources at destroying the perpetrator. Victims of rape should not live with the mindset of “no one wants to give me justice”, they should rather live with the mentality of “let someone try stopping me from getting justice”.

If our collective mentality does not change, then the new Sexual Offenses Bill passed by the national assembly which gives a fraction of "mock-able hope" to victims of sexual assault will be as useful or as useless as the Freedom of Information (FoI) Act. An Act which even years after being signed into law to protect information seekers and managers, we still see journalists being beaten to pulp by police men at public offices and institutions and almost no one has been punished based on the provisions of the act. It is not about having good laws, good laws do not enforce themselves; and with the mentality of the law enforcers skewed, all the laws in the world will not make any difference.

Parents should never raise their children (both boys and girls) to believe that aggressive jealousy is a sign of love. If a girl is raised to find aggression from the opposite sex attractive, then she will most likely grow into a woman who will not just be abused in future, but will also accept it. Likewise if a boy is raised with the same notion, he may grow into a partial or serial wife beater or rapist.

Rape must be made ugly in Nigeria, but first, the mind set must change.

A victim is a victim and not an offender.

http://www.mybeautifulnigeria.com/why-rape-has-become-beautiful-in-nigeria/

HMM

When rape is beautiful

1. When you follow a guy to his house or hotel room after he had spent some cash on you. What were you thinking would happen when you follow him.

2. When you wear your skimpy and rock a guy at the club and he offer to give you a lift back home.

3. When big cars dey drop you off and you no send for area boys, then you wear bumshort to buy indomie across the next street at 11pm.

4. When you visit a guy who have been begging you for it. (not the ones like me who have reached an understanding with the partner)

5. When you are a choirister or prayer warrior and everyone else have tasted the couchie except Bro Emma then you want to have a relationship with Bro Emma with the rule "No sex before marriage"