lecturerdabo:
Op, I feel lyk slapping that ur guy ryt now!

Bt wait! D problem is dat he bedded ur sis abi? Wat about other random gals u don't know?

Maybe I will advice u to kil dat bi. Ch of a sister(I will become ur sister after dat)

Na who holy pass?

I know I'm sounding insensitive, yea its intentional!!

I know u ar seriously bruised, yes!

But pls
NEVER THROW THE BABY WITH THE BATHING WATER!!

Listen to your sister,

find out why she decided to come clean after four years, she may know more than you think about that spouse of yours

Now to save face, your guy will claim your sis wants to blackmail him with the incident between them. That is not to say ITS NOT HER INTENTION! I don't know!!

Find out if you can manage this two people for the rest of ur life cos their part will continue to cross if the marriage should hold!

Convince yourself that your guy will not relapse(he might cheat again) bt be sure he will never bed ur sister again if you are not convinced....

QUIT THE RELATIONSHIP.

UR sister will always be ur sister no matter what!

He was silly to sleep with your sister just because you stepped out to the market! What if you travel? I'm in d north east for 5months now and my wife is nt panicking haba!!

What happened to self control

PresVA:
It's now Op's fault abi? She should go around shielding every "wayward" girl from his guy? Cos the guy has no control abi?

Op, Asides the betrayal 3yrs ago, has he shown any tendencies of a cheat?

You guys have really built a lot together, breaking up will be so hard... but then living with the memory of your 'husband' fcking your sis may be harder
This is a decision you alone can make, you know how psychologically strong you're. ..

All the best

Nori:
Its a very messy situation, pls move on with your life it's not worth the stress. Your just 24 years old you will meet many other men that haven't slept with your sister.

ennyhola:
Funaab?

dorocent:

PS; I was in total shock to read the comment from @dorocent (not picking on you) but you want the OP to go ahead and marry her BF that just betrayed her but when it was your turn with the same scenario you left your GF after she betrayed you with your friend? You couldn’t accept your GF back but you want someone else in the same scenario to accept their BF back? IT’S ALWAYS GOOD TO GIVE AN ADVICE THAT YOU KNOW YOU CAN ACCEPT IF SUCH HAPPENS TO YOU AND NOT GIVE ONE THAT YOU KNOW YOU WOULD NOT ACCEPT YOURSELF. (No offense; hope none taken).
bro u didn't knw d full details of my story. Lemme summarize it fr u. After I found out abt it. I confronted her n my friend. She said she wnts him jux bcux den, d guy has hux (his late dad's hux). To me, I fink she tinks she cn easily marry him (desperate lady) cux den I still leave in my fmily hux. Wen I had d discussion wt my frd as well, he said I shud 4gv him dat she ws all ova him.(I undastood him n told him, woman cnt cum btw us cux of d friendly luv we hv s childhood frds)

BACK TO D TOPIC
Is d op still luv her bfrd, why cnt she move ahead wt him? Bsyd she said it was done 3yrs back. Apart frm dat, dey hvnt had issues of such. Guy anybody fit fall fr temptation...
In 2face voice, NOBODY HOLY PASS OOO. Hope u see reasons wt me. Luv conquers all. Tnk u

prettynerd:
tnks everyone for taking ur time to reply, actually heard her side of the story, she said it was consensual, her current boyfrnd had to force her to confess to me after she confessed all her sexcapades to him which is the condition for him to marry her, she didn't even want me to know at all, she even called my fiance ( if i can still call him dat) and was quarelling with him for telling me, she said there was no emotions involved, she was just having weird fun and seduced him cos she thought we won't last too, i've never done anything to hurt her before o, only that i get angry with her a lot for living a careless life, the worst part is that she did same thing to two of my aunts husband. I feel she needs help mentally, but she still behave very normal only for this unveiled secret, STILL SHOCKED!

byvan03:




Your sister is wayward, agreed. These men are blameless to you? Forgive this guy but give the marriage thing a break till you are convinced you are over it or can live with it for the rest of your life.

prettynerd:



they are guilty as well, as far as i'm concerned they are all to blame for lack of self control and respect for themselves, i've already given the relationship a break

prettynerd:
tnks everyone for taking ur time to reply, actually heard her side of the story, she said it was consensual, her current boyfrnd had to force her to confess to me after she confessed all her sexcapades to him which is the condition for him to marry her, she didn't even want me to know at all, she even called my fiance ( if i can still call him dat) and was quarelling with him for telling me, she said there was no emotions involved, she was just having weird fun and seduced him cos she thought we won't last too, i've never done anything to hurt her before o, only that i get angry with her a lot for living a careless life, the worst part is that she did same thing to two of my aunts husband. I feel she needs help mentally, but she still behave very normal only for this unveiled secret, STILL SHOCKED!

prettynerd:



they are guilty as well, as far as i'm concerned they are all to blame for lack of self control and respect for themselves, i've already given the relationship a break

prettynerd:
tnks everyone for taking ur time to reply, actually heard her side of the story, she said it was consensual, her current boyfrnd had to force her to confess to me after she confessed all her sexcapades to him which is the condition for him to marry her, she didn't even want me to know at all, she even called my fiance ( if i can still call him dat) and was quarelling with him for telling me, she said there was no emotions involved, she was just having weird fun and seduced him cos she thought we won't last too, i've never done anything to hurt her before o, only that i get angry with her a lot for living a careless life, the worst part is that she did same thing to two of my aunts husband. I feel she needs help mentally, but she still behave very normal only for this unveiled secret, STILL SHOCKED!

Onegai:


Prettynerd, this poster asking you to forgive and plan your marriage, did not take his own advice when his girl slept with his friend (he broke up with her and kept his friendship). Remember, most people will do opposite of whatever they advise you to do.

Now, let's talk about your wedding day! You, smiling beside your groom, beaming to take pictures, your sister wearing family asoebi and standing beside your man to join in the picture....

Or will you tell her not to attend the wedding because of the fact she and your man has sex whilst you were dating? How about when babies come, is she still going to be allowed to visit? What if your mum says she should join her to do the omugwu, will you start having panic attacks every night your "darling husband who could not hold his body for the short time you want to the market", goes to the toilet? What if the kids are older and you need to travel wihout them and mum is not available and she asks "tell your sister to stay, na"? And you panic again?

Can you live like that? For the rest of your life? If you can live with this and get over it, sure.

All I know is, the longer I held onto stuff, thinking whatever was out there was worse, when I eventually or go, things were always better. Different but better. Fear of the unknown keeps one back. But people have been in your situation and gone on to marry the man.

Take some time off from relationship, listen to what your sister said happened that day, switch off your phones afterwards and THINK. You're already giving him an excuse: your sister is wayward. Ignoring the fact that wayward or not, he had NO justification to sleep with her. What next, every single friend of yours looking attractive will be accused of trying to seduce him? A lot of married women are like that, "don't send my husband birthday greetings, you're yellow/pretty/busty/have arse/etc" and end their friendships because of it.

Will he be so understanding if you slept with his father? Yes, there are plenty cheating fathers out there, why not take a chance with his?

He sampled your sister and may be even tasted you that night or the next, high-fiving himself in congratulations (thats how guys are, sexual prowess is something they cheer themselves on). Did he even use a condom? You and your sister have shared everything: a womb, food, toys, clothes, a man. How nice

cococandy:
what a monster girl.

Good decision to leave the relationship.

I don't even know what to say about those guys. So anyone that tempts them will succeed in sleeping with them? No self control? Even nieces-in-law and girlfriend's sister. I doff my cap.

InformedLola:
Prettynerd, just read your Mar thread about your wayward sisters. If the one involved with your fiance is the 18 year old, that means she was only 15 when the incident occurred.

If this is correct, then your fiance is a rapist, pure and simple. This is statutory rape!! If this was a well structured country, we would have been talking about a court case here.

Please forgive the girl, she was a baby. She's still a baby in fact and needs strong guidance. Don't think twice about leaving that man.

crackhaus:
Am I the only one who found this funny?

prettynerd:
tnks everyone for taking ur time to reply, actually heard her side of the story, she said it was consensual, her current boyfrnd had to force her to confess to me after she confessed all her sexcapades to him which is the condition for him to marry her, she didn't even want me to know at all, she even called my fiance ( if i can still call him dat) and was quarelling with him for telling me, she said there was no emotions involved, she was just having weird fun and seduced him cos she thought we won't last too, i've never done anything to hurt her before o, only that i get angry with her a lot for living a careless life, the worst part is that she did same thing to two of my aunts husband. I feel she needs help mentally, but she still behave very normal only for this unveiled secret, STILL SHOCKED!

nnamdibig:
Forget all these people telling you to leave the guy. Come to think of it, what if they never opened up to you? This is not the time to trade blames, it happened 3 yes ago.
Ask yourself, has this guy been faithful all these while?
Mind you, your sister that did all that will soon get married even when her fiance knows all this. Just forgive her and our man and move on. its challenges like this that will really show whether you guys love each for real.

TV01:
At all, more uninformed than funny though.

Can I raise you one please? A man is not allowed to lay a finger on his wife, even if he finds her in bed with another man on top, but a woman can kill her sister, just because she slept with her - at the time - casual boyfriend?

I repeat, generally, a womans sexual history is more important to a man, than a mans is to a woman.