diva90:


My dear, it's all about CHOICE! It's never been a crime to keep both names. It's a different thing if the woman doesn't want to bear her husband's name at all and would prefer to go by just her family's surname

What reason would make you make such a ridiculous choice? Abi the thing no funny to you?

OK, whenever I need to confide in someone, I'll pick my mum over you. Shikena!

See men fighting over their poverty-ridden names. This problems arises when there is no fame, prestige, or wealth attached to the said name cos I have never seen the actress..Caroline Ekanem asking this question when she married Dangote abi Danjuma junior. So, any woman that is bearing the name of a struggling broke ass man needs to be applauded for their solidarity in the struggle, it is a sign of good faith in you not cos you are the next thing after slice bread or because you paid 20naira as her bride price.

Men stop whining, be successful and women will be struggling to bear and propagate your name.

Acidosis:



Nigerian women sha. The only thing YOU ALL love about this latest trend is the "-"



Just the hyphenated names, and nothing more!

Na ordinarily "-"

I'm also SURE that over 70% of ladies who do this engage in the act NOT because they love their father's name soooooo well (na lie!). It is mainly to "appear" as a married woman.

Na wa! To my future wife, if it is "-" you want, go and use it At least to appear married on the Social Media, and send signals to predators!


Even women whose surnames are Ajanaku , Gorimapa will claim love for father's name. Iffahear!!

They don't love their dad, they just pretend to.

When it comes to sending money home, their mum gets the most of it, if not all. When Daddy complains, they tell him that they have paid him his own share by adding his name to their hubby's name.

SirVintageCock:
See men fighting over their poverty-ridden names. This problems arises when there is no fame, prestige, or wealth attached to the said name cos I have never seen the actress..Caroline Ekanem asking this question when she married Dangote abi Danjuma junior. So, any woman that is bearing the name of a struggling broke ass man needs to be applauded for their solidarity in the struggle, it is a sign of good faith in you not cos you are the next thing after slice bread or because you paid 20naira as her bride price.

Men stop whining, be successful and women will be struggling to bear and propagate your name.

If the girl's surname says she is the daughter of Dangote, Otedola or Adenuga, then she can add the name to your poverty-strickened name. At least, it will help the guy.

But why add another poverty-strickened name to an already poverty-strickened one?

Na devil send am?

bloodyBLOGGER:
To tell you the bitter truth, Your reasons are silly and belong in the garbage.

You claim you want to help keep your father's name cos he didn't give birth to a male child. I ask, won't the name still did off when you die? Or will you tell your husband that the children you have together must have your father's name attached to his own name just as you have it in yours? Are you aware that even ladies with brothers still want to carry their father's name? It's all a matter of follow follow.



Marrying your husband and bearing his name alone doesn't equate to you forgeting your father. Every reasonable man will refuse it, even a reasonable dad will advice his daughter against such.

Still clinging to your father's name is equivalent to your husband still confiding in his mum instead of you or better yet bringing her into the house.

Just because Hollywood and the media promotes it doesn't mean it has become normal. It is as abnormal as it comes.

seriously u sound too ignorant, I'll just leave it at that cos your level of ignorance is way too overboard. everyone has their freedom to bear whatever name he/she wants and everyone is entitled to his or her opinion. mine is my name will remain the same till d last

bloodyBLOGGER:
What reason would make you make such a ridiculous choice? Abi the thing no funny to you?

OK, whenever I need to confide in someone, I'll pick my mum over you. Shikena!

Whatever! Every body must not buy into your opinion! When you marry a wife, if you do, hold a gun to her head and tell her not to try it. You might as well encourage her to completely cut away from her family since you have 'paid' her bride price. It's unfortunate that men like you fail to understand that marriage is not the end of a woman's life and does not completely cut her ties to her own family

diva90:
Nothing wrong with that. So far as you have your husband's surname too. You can be identified with both names eg. Kate Adekunle-omoare ... Adekunle is maiden name , married name is omoare. A lot of women do same these days

Yeah, daz me! We had a mutual agreement to keep my maiden name after marriage, not a big deal.

SWITANN:





assuming my name is Olu funmi,it has been like that for so many years. I met my heart rob,got married then I become Ade-Olu funmi. I can be from a home that has only females as children,I also want to carry on my father's name and the honour that comes with bearing the name. just because am getting married to another man doesn't mean I should forget the one that gave birth to me (cos two people make a baby). so holding on to one's last name after marriage is not wrong and a grown ass man who loves his wife would accept. only the proud ones will refuse.

the history of maiden name retention after marriage is steeped in feminism and has caused many a good woman a loss of face.


now,you say you want to retain your fathers name after marriage but you forget that if your mother had kept her maiden name,you'll be faced with a challenge as to how to deal with three names(your father's,your mother's and your husband's) . imagine if four generations down the line adopts this method,imagine how cumbersome a name will become all in the name of feminism;


also,what if your kids keep only their father's name,as is expected of them,won't your aim have been defeated?

geez18:

the history of maiden name retention after marriage is steeped in feminism and has caused many a good woman a loss of face.


now,you say you want to retain your fathers name after marriage but you forget that if your mother had kept her maiden name,you'll be faced with a challenge as to how to deal with three names(your father's,your mother's and your husband's) . imagine if four generations down the line adopts this method,imagine how cumbersome a name will become all in the name of feminism;


also,what if your kids keep only their father's name,as is expected of them,won't your aim have been defeated?

my aim was not for my children to bear my last name,it is for everyone to use whatever last name we want. we have that freedom and I focused on ladies last name after marriage. I know some guys that bear their mothers last name, too much emphasis is being put on a female's last name after marriage. I say everyone is free to do what they want and keeping ones last name shouldn't be frowned upon.

SWITANN:







my aim was not for my children to bear my last name,it is for everyone to use whatever last name we want. we have that freedom and I focused on ladies last name after marriage. I know some guys that bear their mothers last name, too much emphasis is being put on a female's last name after marriage. I say everyone is free to do what they want and keeping ones last name shouldn't be frowned upon.

anyways,goodluck with that!

geez18:

anyways,goodluck with that!

yeahyeah

SWITANN:




yeahyeah

where are you from?

diva90:


Whatever! Every body must not buy into your opinion! When you marry a wife, if you do, hold a gun to her head and tell her not to try it. You might as well encourage her to completely cut away from her family since you have 'paid' her bride price. It's unfortunate that men like you fail to understand that marriage is not the end of a woman's life and does not completely cut her ties to her own family

And who says kicking against her use other father's name alongside mine will cut her from her family? Did it cut our mummies from their families?

Stop this copy-cat syndrome.

opeaceo:
What's in a name anyways?? I'm sure if the op is married to a Rothschild or an Oppenheimer, she would be singing a different tune

That's what I was asking myself; what is in a name?

SWITANN:
I for one don't see anything wrong in a lady wanting to keep her last name after marriage,the same reason a man would want to keep his father's name is the same reason why a woman wants to also. So she shouldn't be denied that chance. I would also like to keep my last name after marriage.
pls is it bad or good? COMMENT!!!

Very nice

Artistree:

Yeah, daz me! We had a mutual agreement to keep my maiden name after marriage, not a big deal.

What name will your kids bear?

SWITANN:


my aim was not for my children to bear my last name,it is for everyone to use whatever last name we want. we have that freedom and I focused on ladies last name after marriage. I know some guys that bear their mothers last name, too much emphasis is being put on a female's last name after marriage. I say everyone is free to do what they want and keeping ones last name shouldn't be frowned upon.

You still haven't educated us on the exact reason(s) why you want to keep your father's name.

Does the name open up doors for you, or you just feel it's cool to have hyphenated names?

geez18:

where are you from?

ANAMBRA

Acidosis:


"I am my own woman", so why insist on the father's name?


I will give you 10 reasons why a woman MUST drop her father's name, after you must have mentioned only ONE reason why a woman should retain her father's name aside PRIDE.

Just name 1, I will give you 10.

The truth is you all have absolutely no reason to retain the name aside Pride and of course, to prove the status of " Mrs Independent BUT married ". Why marry when you're independent? Why depend on daddy's name if you're truly independent?

No one will tell her to drop her father's name when she marries a wealthy man...she will change names faster than the speed of light.

SWITANN:



ANAMBRA

but you live in the west? schooling?

geez18:

but you live in the west? schooling?

yeah I school in the west

SWITANN:







yeah I school in the west

ok

SWITANN:







yeah I school in the west

ok

is it not funny that keeping your name is "follow-follow" syndrome but changing it isn't?

And then you're a proud person if you don't change but then part of the reason men complain against it is "they want you to be proud to bare their surname".

It is feminism if you don't change but not chauvinistic if you do?

All your reasons for wanting to keep your last name are fit for garbage but changing your name "because your mama did it" is sane?


Anyhow, such topics are important but at the end of the day, it's a decision you make with said hubby.

Adaeze003:
is it not funny that keeping your name is "follow-follow" syndrome but changing it isn't?

And then you're a proud person if you don't change but then part of the reason men complain against it is "they want you to be proud to bare their surname".

It is feminism if you don't change but not chauvinistic if you do?

All your reasons for wanting to keep your last name are fit for garbage but changing your nabe "because your mama did it" is sane?


Anyhow, such topics are important but at the end of the day, it's a decision you make with said hubby.

Marriage as a union is follow-follow syndrome anyway.


Why are girls of nowadays so bothered about marriage?

That our moms got married is not enough reason for nowadays women to get married. But if they so choose to go ahead, they've got no choice but to stick with the rules. Last time I checked, men still pay bride price, and dowry.

Whatever rocks your boat...... As long as you and your spouse are in agreement...

Acidosis:


Marriage as a union is follow-follow syndrome anyway.


Why are girls of nowadays so bothered about marriage?

That our moms got married is not enough reason for nowadays women to get married. But if they so choose to go ahead, they've got no choice but to stick with the rules. Last time I checked, men still pay bride price, and dowry.

Girls get married for so many reasons Mr but "because mama did" or the "follow-follow" syndrome is NOT one of them. And you're right about the choosing part, it is a choice to get married and also a choice to change names.

And then, they must not stick to any unwritten rule especially when you gain or lose nothing from the "rule"(in MY opinion). Or is there a law somewhere or a bible portion you want to show me?


Lastly, no one can own a human being apart from said human. That said, bride price is not a transfer of ownership or "buying" another human being(ie slavery). The very fact that you bring it up insinuates that you think it is. So, if you want to buy a human, you better pay her whatever amount she wants.

Adaeze003:


Girls get married for so many reasons Mr but "because mama did" or the "follow-follow" syndrome is NOT one of them. And you're right about the choosing part, it is a choice to get married and also a choice to change names.

And then, they must not stick to any unwritten rule especially when you gain or lose nothing from the "rule"(in MY opinion). Or is there a law somewhere or a bible portion you want to show me?


Lastly, no one can own a human being apart from said human. That said, bride price is not a transfer of ownership or "buying" another human being(ie slavery). The very fact that you bring it up insinuates that you think it is. So, if you want to buy a human, you better pay her whatever amount she wants.

Bride price is paid to the woman's father (family). Once the payment is made, the father's name becomes history. That's the norm and it will remain for as long as men still pay bride price.


The psychology behind this trend is meaningless. I've mentioned it earlier that "hyphen" is the only reason many women follow this path.

If indeed you want to emancipate women to retain their father's names, they should stick with the name after marriage and not attach some hyphens as though the husband is wedded with the father.

Acidosis:



Bride price is paid to the woman's father (family). Once the payment is made, the father's name becomes history. That's the norm and it will remain for as long as men still pay bride price.


The psychology behind this trend is meaningless. I've mentioned it earlier that "hyphen" is the only reason path.

If indeed you want to emancipate women to retain their father's names, they should stick with the name after marriage and not attached some hyphens as though the husband is wedded with the father.

Bride price has nothing to do with change of name. Maybe it does to you but not to everyone(obviously).

Oh, I'm all for no hyphen, keeping the name as it is with no change whatsoever. But some people want the hyphen, some people want to change. It is greatly the woman's decision to make.

But life is easy you know? I say this allot, you get to marry just ONE person legally so marry someone who doesn't mind changing. Easy as pancake don't you think?

Because flinging your unwritten rule in everyone's face isn't working.

Adaeze003:


Bride price has nothing to do with change of name. Maybe it does to you but not to everyone(obviously).

Oh, I'm all for no hyphen, keeping the name as it is with no change whatsoever. But some people want the hyphen, some people want to change. It is greatly the woman's decision to make.

But life is easy you know? I say this allot, you get to marry just ONE person legally so marry someone who doesn't mind changing. Easy as pancake don't you think?

Because flinging your unwritten rule in everyone's face isn't working.

The so called unwritten rule is longstanding, so it shall continue to stand.


I have only one mission on Nairaland's family section: to depopulate the coven of feminists, and discombobulate their camps.

It is sad that those who preach feminism on this forum do not practise such in real life and in their homes, however, they derive pleasures in misleading the susceptible ones who only come here to read and learn.

If I can reduce their camps by 50%, even God will be happy with me.

Adaeze003:


Girls get married for so many reasons Mr but "because mama did" or the "follow-follow" syndrome is NOT one of them. And you're right about the choosing part, it is a choice to get married and also a choice to change names.

And then, they must not stick to any unwritten rule especially when you gain or lose nothing from the "rule"(in MY opinion). Or is there a law somewhere or a bible portion you want to show me?


Lastly, no one can own a human being apart from said human. That said, bride price is not a transfer of ownership or "buying" another human being(ie slavery). The very fact that you bring it up insinuates that you think it is. So, if you want to buy a human, you better pay her whatever amount she wants.

The reason why women bear the mans name and not the other way is because the man takes all the giant strides in most marriages..... He woos the lady 99% of the time, proposes to her 99% of the time, pays her dowry 99% of the time ( in African marriages). Brings her to live in his house 90% of the time.... You see where am headed abi? No be follow follow, its just one of the unwritten rules of life.... Whoever pays the piper dictates the .......