I was 19 in my second year of University and I felt inadequate, my self –esteem hadn’t risen much from my early teenage years. I had decided to stop raving (aka partying, clubbing) as it wasn’t bringing me a boyfriend, every rave was the same and I felt empty. My best friend at University was the most dedicated Christian I had ever met, we had both decided to stop raving to focus on our respective faiths. We were very close course mates, work mates and flatmates but she was Christian and I was Muslim.

It was never an issue, sure we debated but we were respectful enough that we never crossed lines and it never affected our friendship. I was a very confident Muslim, was adamant that there was nothing I would want more than to die as one going to paradise. I would speak with soo much passion and conviction that, those in limbo with their faith couldn’t help but give Islam a second thought. That all changed in one night. It was the month of Ramadan and I was feeling extra spiritual. I was at University and I had an early night.

I found myself in a waiting room alongside my best friend and two of my friends. I was soo scared!! I looked around at my friends and they were soo calm and I was the only one shaking and frantically worrying about my mother as we were waiting for the roller coaster to take us to the place we were to be judged. I woke up full of fear and not wanting to go back into the nightmare. I knocked on my friends door scared to sleep, telling her the dream I had, completely baffled that my subconscious wasn’t as confident as my conscious self. I told my mum about the dream, she brushed it away telling me not to worry that she has dreams like that all the time. So I pushed it to the back of my mind, shuddering at the thought. After having religious based conversations with friends I began to question things about my Islamic faith that I had never considered, why wasn’t the signs to watch out for in the last days in the Qur’an like it was in Bible’s book of Revelations? Why couldn’t I pray to God whilst on my period what if I really needed him at such times? Why did I have to learn another language to speak to God – after all he’s Omniscient?!

I questioned these silently and would pore over my Qur’an trying to find the answers. Me and two friends were up late at night talking about dreams, the conversation switched when my friend turned to me and said “You never talk about that dream that you had”. I was taken by surprise and lost composure asking why she would bring it up knowing how it made me feel. She pushed and told me that she felt the dream was significant and that I should come to her church, no obligation but she felt if I got nothing from it at least I would enjoy the music and would never have to go back if I didn’t like it.

For me, I had been to many churches, going to faith based primary and secondary schools, having Christian friends and members of my extended family so it wasn’t new to me. In fact I would leave the church programs determined to be a better Muslim! The next day was Sunday, and when I woke up I suddenly felt apprehensive and regretted agreeing to go to church. I told my friend who reassured me again that I’d be fine. I went back to my room and said to God, “I’m going to this place today, whatever you want to show me I pray you show it to me”.

I had never prayed like that before. When we got outside the church I felt like I couldn’t go in, and suddenly felt emotional and overwhelmed. So I got myself together, slightly embarrassed I entered. The praise and worship songs were familiar from my days at school, I closed my eyes and tried to hold back the tears that were fighting through. When the praise and worship ended, I quickly wiped away the tears hoping no one had seen. Before the service closed there was an altar call, “Of course you’re not going to get up” “Why would you even think of getting up”’ this was the argument I was having with myself.

When the service closed I stood up pictured myself running out of there, but my legs didn’t cooperate with my brain. I stood there rooted, and I ....

For The Concluding Part, Click here: http://idreamzmedia.com/it-all-started-with-a-dream/